


Cut one off

by Annerp



Series: To Change his fate [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bottom Loki (Marvel), Bottom Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes Is a Good Bro, Character Death, Childbirth, Established Relationship, Flirting, Fluff and Smut, Frigga is a Good Mom, Hydra (Marvel), Jotunn Loki (Marvel), Loki (Marvel) Feels, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, M/M, Magic, Mpreg, Non-Graphic Violence, Oral Sex, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Pregnancy, Racism, Self-Hatred, Sex, Shameless Smut, Shapeshifting, Sick Loki (Marvel), Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Stubborn Steve Rogers, Top Loki (Marvel), Top Steve Rogers, Violence, frostshield - Freeform, steve is a good husband, stoki - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-15
Updated: 2019-02-23
Packaged: 2019-03-05 00:50:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 59
Words: 93,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13376607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Annerp/pseuds/Annerp
Summary: An old enemy resurfaces with a new weapon.





	1. Chapter 1

 

Chapter 1

  

Loki stands, contemplating the front door of his and Steve’s Brooklyn home. It is brown and simple and oh so boring. His first instinct had been to repaint the entire house green with black and gold trim when they first moved in, but he deferred to Steve on that issue, when the blonde pointed out that none of the other houses looked like that and it was better to keep a low profile. They settled on beige, much to Loki’s dismay, with a muted green trim. But this door… that is another matter all together and has bothered him for the past 2 years, since buying the place.

He hopes his husband will approve of the carved wooden door he commissioned. If nothing else, he knows Steve will appreciate the runes, copied from his blades. Loki plans on bespelling them to work as protective wards on the structure of the home.

The corner of his mouth quirks up when he reaches for the ornate handle, thumb settling on to the latch. He can feel the warmth in the Asgardian gold that he had it made of. When he showed it to Steve, the soldier rolled his eyes, but dutifully installed it before settling into his favorite chair, a duplicate of the one from the cabin, much to the gods chagrin, and pulled Loki into his lap. He spent a good amount of time in Steve’s lap and other various positions, hoping that the chair may break so he could replace it with one to his liking, to no avail. But the chair did prove quite useful, giving him just the right angle so that when Steve thrusts up…….

He shakes his head, knowing where that train of thought is going and eagerly pushes down the latch, swinging the door open. The living room is dark, which on its own isn’t surprising, especially if Steve is out with Bucky again, but the low humming that he senses rather than hears is off putting and unusual enough to set his nerves on edge.

Cautiously he steps further into the house, casting a faint illumination in the palm of his hand to give him a quick look around. The relief he feels at seeing Bucky sitting on the couch quickly dissipates as he steps forward. He frowns as the light sputters between one step and the next before winking out completely. The faint humming increases and he can feel his stomach twist uncomfortably. Something is very wrong here. He reaches out and clicks on a lamp.

“James?”

The soldier lifts his gaze, but says nothing. Posture stiff, expression….. Loki isn’t sure what he is seeing.

“James, where is The Captain?”

The god almost misses the quick shift of Bucky’s eyes to the left, before they settle back on him, “we went out on a lead. Had a little trouble. Steven asked me to come get you as soon as you came back from Asgard.”

Loki glances surreptitiously to the side, taking in the shadows, darker than they should be and is barely able to suppress the frown that he feels forming on his lips. Steve knows he was on Vanaheim, not Asgard. “And you were with him? He personally told you to come get me?”

Bucky stands up, movements precise and mechanical and the feeling of unease increases as Loki observes his friend. He has seen these mannerisms before, at a Hydra base in Keiv and again on Asgard.

Bucky’s voice is flat, “yes, he did.”

Loki tentatively reaches out with his magic to confirm that his counter programming is still in place within the soldiers mind. He feels a moment of fear, when he is unable to reach his magic. It is there, but pulls back, just out of his grasp, rendering him unable to use it. That alone is enough for Loki, even without the other clues…… James….. The Captain….. Steven……. Asgard….all wrong. Without his magic to confirm that Steve is still the trigger to counter act the Winter Soldier programming, Loki will have to just hope that he is not wrong.

“Take me to him,” he says.

Bucky doesn’t reply as he walks to the door and waits for Loki to follow him out. The solider leads him to a black 4 door sedan parked a block away. Loki notes that the humming does not diminish as they get farther from the house, telling him that the cause is coming from Bucky himself.  As the soldier drives out of the neighborhood and heads towards the interstate, Loki doesn’t miss the gray SUV that follows behind. He has to assume the occupant or occupants were the ones that were in his home. It is no matter to him. Those men forfeited their lives, the moment they stepped foot within his home.

Loki takes quick stock of his situation. He is, for the moment unable to reach his magic, Steve is missing, possibly captured, Bucky may or may not be ensconced in the Winter Soldier programming, he is being taken into unknown territory to face an unknown threat. However, he has his blades, always concealed on his person, he is a highly skilled hand to hand fighter and extremely motivated to get to his husband. And if that means killing everyone who stands in his way with his own 2 hands, all the better.

They drive for 3 hours in silence, before Bucky pulls off the interstate and turns down a gravel road. The SUV keeps its distance, but the dusty road gives its position away. Loki gives a grim smile as Bucky brings the car to a stop behind a building, making only a minimal effort to keep them out of sight.

The soldier opens the trunk and pulls a hand gun out. He checks the clip before sliding it in his jacket pocket. He grabs a rifle and checks that as well.

“He’s in there,” he says as he points the gun towards the large cement block building to their right.

“Let us not delay then,” the god responds. He decides to take the direct approach and walks straight to a side door, figuring that if they wanted him dead they would have already made a move.

The door is locked, but a shot from Bucky’s handgun is enough to get it open. Within the first few steps, Loki can feel the increase in the humming and his stomach begins to roil at the sensation. His limbs almost feel sluggish the further he moves into the building. Bucky moves to the front and turns down a side hallway. He passes by several doors before stopping in front of one.

“In here.”

When he makes no move to go in, Loki reaches forward and tries the door. To his surprise it opens easily. He flinches back from the loud buzzing sound, but surges forward when he see’s Steve crumpled on the floor unmoving, his shield laying a few feet away. He can feel it immediately, the effect of where ever that buzzing is coming from and he looks back at Bucky in a panic.

“What is this?”

The soldiers eyes grow wide and his skin starts to prickle into goose bumps as the temperature plummets. “Magic suppressor, stronger than what I have on me. Shit Loki, you’re blue.”

“I take it my programming is still in place,” Loki responds, ignoring Bucky’s comment. He can feel the changes in his body and when he raises his hand, he can see the deep blue of his species covering his skin.

Bucky tears his eyes away from his friend. He glances at Steve who is still slumped on the ground then quickly looks out in to the hallway. “Yeah, they tried to put me under as soon as Steve went down. We don’t have much time, they’ve been monitoring my movements. Are you ok to fight?”

“Just don’t touch me. The cold will burn your flesh.” He looks back to his husband, “what did they do to him?”

“Soon as we got in here, he said he wasn’t feeling right. I’m guessing from the suppressor. We got into a scuffle and he took a shot to the leg. They hit him with a dart of some kind and then this buzzing started. He went down hard Loki.” The soldiers focus is still on the hallway, “here they come.”

Loki thinks quickly, without his magic, he cannot erect a shield to protect them. He reaches into his coat and wraps his hand around the handle of one of his blades, hoping the unique properties of the vibranium will be able to withstand the freezing temperature of his touch and lets out a relieved sigh when it holds. He grabs Steve’s shield and places it on his arm. He is severely weakened, but not helpless. He has his blades, his lovers shield and he can wield this bodies attributes as a weapon. He will destroy them all.

“Stay back. I’ll handle this.”

“Loki, there’s at least 50 of them in this building. You can’t take them all on alone. We need to get Steve and get out of here. We can come back later with more firepower and when you can use your magic.”

“Guard him. Kill any that get past me.”

The god raises the shield in front of his body and steps out into the hall, where he is met with a hail of gunfire.

“Dammit Loki!” Bucky turns to Steve and pulls him towards the back corner of the room where there is another door inset into the wall. There is no handle on this side, but he doesn’t let that stop him.

He grabs the rifle and aims where he thinks the hinges should be and fires as he tries to ignore the screams coming from the hall outside.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

 

Chapter 2

 

Steve jerks awake just in time to see Bucky plant his booted foot in the center of a door at the back of the room they are in. He can hear shouting outside the room mixed in with intermittent gun fire, punctuated by pained screams.

“What’s going on?” he asks Bucky as he tries to get to his feet.

The soldier turns to his friend, moving quickly to help him up. Steve flinches at a particularly loud scream, followed by a thud.

“So, uh, that would be Loki.”

Leaning heavily against a wall, Steve asks, even though he is afraid he already knows the answer, “what is he doing?”

“If I had to hazard a guess, I would say, he is tearing this place apart.”

Steve sags down the wall until he is seated, dropping his head low.

Bucky knows the magic suppressor is making Steve weak and so he turns back to the door he kicked in. There is a room beyond, filled with computer equipment and sitting on a table in the center of the room is a large machine that is the source of the incessant buzzing. He pulls out his hand gun and empties the clip into it, until the buzzing stops. The small suppressor is already laying in pieces in the other room, so Bucky hopes Steve will recover enough to be able to get out under his own power.

“Did that do it? Can you still feel it?” he asks Steve.

“Yeah, that did it. Thanks Buck. Just give me a minute to clear my head.”

“No problem, I think Loki’s got it pretty much under control,” he ventures based on the eerie quiet that has settled over the building. “So, um, have you ever actually seen Loki in his Jotun form?”

Steve narrows his eyes, “no, he isn’t able to make the shift into that form. Why?”

“No reason,” Bucky responds as he see’s Loki standing in the door way.

Steve follows his friends gaze and has to consciously stop himself from reacting when he see’s the god. He wishes he was able to say it didn’t startle him, that he found Loki’s blue skin beautiful, but in truth, it just looks alien. And cold. It is still his husband though. He pulls on his magic to clear the residual tranquilizer out of his system.

The wound in the blonde’s leg will have to wait until the bullet is removed. Getting back to his feet, he limps towards the door.

He isn’t prepared to see the fear on Loki’s features as he practically jumps back into the hallway. “Don’t! I can’t change back. I don’t know what’s wrong.”

“Ok, ok, I’ll stay back.” He stops moving forward, “How were you able to shift this time?”

Loki looks absolutely miserable, “I didn’t do it. They found a way to cut us off from our magic Steve. My magic has returned, but I can’t turn back.”

“Its ok. We’ll figure it out. For now, we need to shut this place down and get out of here. Can you take care of the stuff in that room while I look around?” He gestures back to the where Bucky destroyed the large suppressor.

When Loki says he can and moves out of the way, Steve limps out into the hallway and stops in his tracks when he see’s the carnage before him. “Hey, Buck, you wanna check the east side of the building for me?”

“Yeah, no problem,” he responds. He has seen enough death over the years that he doesn’t react when he see’s the mess in the hallway. He simply turns down the hall and begins to search the building.

Steve swallows hard at the reminder of his husbands power and penchant for destruction especially of those who would cause him harm. Gingerly, he picks his way through the hallway, stepping over bodies as he goes. There is surprisingly little blood and upon closer inspection, he can see signs of frostbite on several of them. One has a large ice shard protruding from his chest that is beginning to melt. There are bullet holes in the walls, discarded guns and even a few knives strewn amongst the bodies, showing these men fought to the last.

From the looks of things, Loki did not spare anyone, but Steve is compelled to check, just in case. As suspected he finds no one left alive. The god was ruthless and efficient in his mission. He knows he should be bothered by it, but surprisingly he isn’t. Not when he considers that they used him and Bucky to try and trap Loki, so they could do who knows what to him.

The god spends his time trying to will his body to return to his normal visage. He turns to the door when Steve comes in, “I found the rest of the suppressors in the lab. Come with me and we can destroy them and get out of here.”

Loki nods and follows Steve back out into the hallway, keeping his distance. The blonde leads him into a lab and they find Bucky downloading files from a computer station.

“I figure we need to see what kinda tech they have. I grabbed a couple of the small suppressors. We should probably have someone look at them.”

“Good idea.” He turns to his husband, “All of this needs to be destroyed.”

“Of course,” Loki responds as he steps up to the nearest table and freezes everything on it with a touch. A small pulse of magic is all it takes to shatter everything into tiny pieces. He moves throughout the lab until everything is destroyed with the exception of the few items Bucky kept.

“I’ll call Fury and he can get a team over here to do clean up,” Steve announces. “I think we’re done here.”

“It would be best if I go on ahead, on my own, that way I don’t cause any harm like this,” Loki says.

“Um, yeah that’s probably a good idea,” Steve tells his husband.

Bucky slaps his hand on Steve’s back, “you go ahead Loki, I’ll get Steve home.”

Loki doesn’t waste any time before opening the way to Yggdrasil and going home.

 

The drive is long and Steve is tired so he rests his head against the window and closes his eyes, trying to tune out the conversation Bucky is having with Natasha on the phone. He ends the call telling her he will stop by with the files and suppressors he saved once he drops Steve off.

Tony Stark would be the obvious person to check out the magic suppressing tech, but Steve’s relationship with the billionaire is still not on solid footing. Hopefully Natasha can find someone trustworthy or at a minimum keep the tech under wraps until they find someone who can check it out.

The blonde tries to let the motion of the car lull him into sleep. He doesn’t want to think about how it felt to have his magic tampered with. He can only imagine how bad it must have been for Loki, whose magic is so much stronger. He will have to make a priority of hunting down any more of this tech that may be out there. For now though he wants to get home, let Bucky pull the bullet out of his leg and crawl into bed with his husband. Except that he can’t do that……. _Damn_.

 

Steve keeps trying not to stare at Loki, but seeing him like this is.... unsettling. The fact that Loki is obviously uncomfortable doesn't help matters. So finally he decides to say something.  
  
"Loki? Do you mind, would you be okay with letting me see you? Like this?"  
  
The look of horror on the gods face is fleeting, but Steve notices it anyway. "Why would you want to look at this?"  
  
Steve moves closer, his intention to sit on the couch next to his husband, but he can feel the cold seeping into his skin before he is a few feet away. He chooses to sit on the opposite end of the couch hopefully close enough to offer some reassurance but far enough to stop him from shivering and shaking. The fabric of the couch is cold against his skin and he begins to figure out a way to casually get back up without offending the god.  
  
"You're my husband Loki, and I love every part of you, even the parts you don't."  
  
When Loki doesn't respond he adds, "please. Do this for me."  
  
Reluctantly Loki stands and begins to shed his clothing. A relief actually as in this current form he finds them stifling and hot. When he is fully revealed he avoids making eye contact as Steve looks him over. Taking the opportunity to stand and get off the couch he takes a step closer. Immediately his skin breaks out in goose bumps, but he is just barely able to suppress a shiver. Calling on his magic he uses it to create a small flame in his hand, then coaxes the heat around his body. It doesn't offer much protection against the cold emanating from Loki, but it is enough. For now. 

Slowly he circles the god, taking in the slight variations in colors on his skin, the raised markings that start on his face and travel down his body. There is something memorizing and exotic about them and while he wouldn't go so far as to say he finds this form beautiful, certainly not in the way he does Loki's other form, he doesn't find it unattractive.  
  
Oddly enough it is the eyes that bother him the least. The color is drastically different, but something about them strikes a chord with him. Maybe he is just reacting to the fear and shame he see's in them.  
  
"What would happen if I were to touch you in this form?" he asks.  
  
"I would burn you. Severe frost bite within moments." The tone of his voice gives away his fear. What if he cannot change back? What if he is never able to be close to his love again?  
  
"And you still can't change back?"  
  
"No. I don't know what's wrong."  
  
"Can we go to Asgard? Maybe your mother or Odin can help you?"  
  
"I cannot do that. Frost giants are still an enemy to Asgard. I am likely to be killed on site should I appear."  
  
That doesn't sit right with Steve, "but surely they would know it was you? And you have your magic. You'd be able to protect yourself."  
  
"Frost Giants are killed on site. I would not be given time to explain. And if I did defend myself? If I hurt someone? My relationship with Asgard is still tenuous unless the All father has use of me. I do not wish to see Odin or the council of elders provoked into rescinding the order of stay for my crimes."  
  
Steve is not ready to give up on this yet. "Ok so what if I went first? And let them know you are coming? So they can be prepared?"  
  
Loki reaches down and grabs his clothes. Steve can tell by his movements that he is angry. "You do not understand! I will not go to Asgard like this!" He straightens and flings his arms out to his sides as he says this.  
  
Steve isn't quite able to stop the involuntary step he takes backwards. "Alright," he says calmly, "we'll figure something out. I'll talk to Strange and see if he knows of a spell. Odin used magic to turn you Aesir. We should be able to use magic to turn you back."

Loki nods his head, not really agreeing, but not disagreeing either. "I'll move my things into one of the other bedrooms in the mean time and you should pull out your winter gear. I know how much you hate the cold."  
  
The blonde’s heart breaks a little, hearing the resigned tone of his husbands voice. "I don't hate the cold Loki. I mean, yeah, it used to bother me a lot, but we've had some really good times too. I've always loved Christmas and with you it's even better. You remember taking walks in the snow, kissing in the rain that time in the park, the time we tried ice skating? All good memories despite how terrible I am on skates." He gives his husband his best smile and is rewarded with a small smile from the god in return. "I'll go call Dr. Strange right now. We'll get this figured out. I promise."

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

 

Chapter 3

 

Steve is hunched over a table, 200 pages into a thick book, when his phone rings. A quick glance at the screen tells him it is Bucky calling. He gratefully takes the excuse to get up and stretch as he answers the call. 

“What’s up?”

“Nat and I were doing some digging. Looks like the World Security Council had been working on some tech to suppress Loki’s magic back since they found out he had been on the helicarrier. They were testing out different methods for awhile. Near as we can tell they had a couple of magic users in captivity they were testing on, mutants according to the notes. I gave the information to Fury to see if there was anyone still being held at the location in the files. His team said the facility was abandoned, but they found bodies.

“Steve, they were just kids. And these bastards experimented on them, then put them down like animals. Every time we think we’ve got them, they just keep coming back.” His voice cracks with emotion as he relays the information.

Steve is shocked and disgusted, even though he knows he shouldn’t be surprised by the atrocities that are committed under Hydra’s regime.

“You remember when Loki got sick a couple of months ago on that raid in Oslo?”

“Yeah,” Steve replies warily. He remembers exactly what happened. The mission had been going well, right up until they actually entered the building. Steve had immediately gotten a bad headache, but Loki….he got downright sick. Vomiting and shaking. He was too weak to continue and so Steve had sent him back outside to watch at the perimeter of the facility, not wanting him to teleport in his condition, until the rest of the team finished up,. By the time they were ready to go, Steve’s head felt ready to explode, but thankfully Loki seemed better, if not pale.

“They were testing,” Bucky tells his friend. “I think they were expecting Loki to be with us this time and when he wasn’t, they disabled you and tried to activate my programming so I would bring him in. It’s a safe bet that they know you have magic Stevie. Even with your badass husband’s rampage, if they sent any data out….” Bucky trails off.

Steve takes this all in for a moment then he asks, “so they wanted you to bring Loki in, using me as bait and you went along with it? Knowing that they had something to counter act his magic.”

The blonde can tell by the huff at the other end of the line that Bucky is insulted, “they were watching me Steve and there was no way I was going to be able to get you out of there by myself. I’m good at saving your sorry ass in a fight, but not that good,” he adds jokingly.

“Yeah ok. At least you’re smart enough to realize that Loki is pretty amazing.” Bucky can hear the smile in his friends voice. “How is he doing anyway?”

“He’s ok. Bored. Not eating enough. Hard to find things that you can eat frozen, you know?”

“Tell him I miss him and that I love him.”

“I will. And how are you holding up?”

There is only a slight pause before Steve answers, “bored, not eating enough, you know? I better get back at it. Thanks for the call Buck.”

 

It has been 3 long weeks since Steve first called Dr. Strange. 3 long weeks staying at the Sanctum Sanctorum so he can study the ancient texts. 3 long weeks of not seeing, talking to or being able to touch his husband and Steve just wants to go home. And today may be the day. He picks up the book he has been reading and takes it over to the table the Doctor is working at, "look at this."  
  
The sorcerer reads over the spell. Then reads it again. "this might work. But it will likely take all 3 of us."  
  
"Odin was able to do it by himself before," Steve objects.  
  
"Odin had the benefit of Gungnir. We have no such artifact. Call Bucky to get in touch with Loki. I'll have Wong prepare a room that we can use."  
  
Steve knows what the Doctor is really saying is Wong will set up a room where Loki's freezing body won't damage anything. He already destroyed his cell phone trying to answer a call from Steve the very first day. So far they have figured out that most fabric and wood is ok, but metal and plastics are off limits.  
  
Steve grins, happy for the first time in weeks, hoping they have found a way to change Loki back.  
  
Within an hour Loki is standing in the room Wong prepared. Steve is practically bouncing on his feet with anticipation. It is hard to be so close to Loki and not be able to touch him. To caress his skin, to kiss every inch of his flesh, to touch him in the most intimate places that he knows so well, to tease and taste and......Steve has to pull his thoughts back together. He can feel his body reacting and certainly doesn't need that as a distraction.  
  
Loki finishes reading the spell from the open book and steps back from the table. "absolutely not."  
  
Steve is sure he misheard, "what?"  
  
"This requires that one of you touch me. We cannot do this. It's too dangerous."  
  
"It's fine Loki. It will only be for a moment. I can do it. With the serum and our magic, I'll heal any damage."  
  
"I said no!"  
  
Dr. Strange has been quietly observing their interaction and speaks up. "There may not be an alternative here Loki."  
  
"I don't care! I will not allow him to hurt himself." He points angrily at his husband who frowns. When Loki turns back to the Doctor, Steve pulls his gloves off, closes the distance between them and grabs Loki's hands. "Strange, we're doing this now."  
  
The Doctor immediately begins to speak the enchantment while Steve pushes at his magic.  
  
"Steve no!" Loki cries and tries to pull his hands away but the soldier holds him tight using his magic to strengthen his grip.  
  
"Do it Loki'," Steve growls.

His hands are already starting to ache and he knows it won't be long before frost bite sets in. Knowing Steve won't give in, Loki opens himself to Strange's incantation and Steve’s own magic. It happens slowly, a lightening of the blue across the backs of his hands, followed by a wave of pale skin that travels over his entire body. Steve heaves a sigh of relief and immediately jerks his hands back. The flex on his fingers when he released Loki almost brings him to his knees. Holding his hands out in front of him, he can see the telltale blackening of his fingertips, the ice clinging to his hands and the bluish tinge that runs from his wrists up under the sleeves of his coat.  
  
Loki is there in an instant, wrapping his hands around Steve’s. Relief comes almost immediately as the black on his fingers begins to recede, but he is still so cold and his body starts to shake uncontrollably. Loki immediately envelopes Steve in his arms. 

“I told you it would be ok,” he stutters.

"Yes love you did. And later we are going to have a talk about putting yourself at risk like that.” Loki turns to the Doctor, "thank you," Loki tells their host before disappearing with Steve in his arms.  
  
Loki takes his husband directly to their bedroom where he quickly strips them both. He has Steve lie beneath the blankets then goes to retrieve several more. Once he has those placed he climbs in the bed and wraps his body around the blonde. It takes a while but Steve’s body does start to warm and he relaxes back into Loki's chest and falls asleep.

It is not surprising when Steve wakes up several times thrashing from nightmares. Each time Loki soothes him, wrapping him back up in the blankets and holding him close.


	4. Chapter 4

 

Chapter 4

 

Loki wakes in the early morning hours, his body hot and uncomfortable. Carefully he moves the blankets over to cover more of Steve and settles back to sleep, feeling only slightly better. Not more than an hour later he wakes again, a light sheen of sweat covering his body and an uncomfortable ache in his belly. He shifts away from Steve and lays on top of the blankets in an effort to cool himself off and tries to sleep again.

It doesn’t work and so he climbs out of bed and heads into the bathroom to take a cool shower. Once he is under the water he starts to feel better, the ache in his belly easing and his temperature at a more comfortable level. Getting out, he dries off and heads back into the bedroom hoping Steve hasn’t woken up, but thankfully the blonde is still sound asleep, although he has kicked off several of the blankets on to the floor.

Loki watches his husband sleeping for a few moments while he contemplates putting on pajama pants, but the longer he stands there, the more he realizes that the room feels stale and uncomfortably warm. So he decides to skip the pajamas and cracks open a window to get some fresh air before laying back down on the bed.

He turns to his side to watch his husband sleep and within minutes realizes he has another problem.

Steve wakes to the feeling of a hand caressing his side. Down his arm, along his hip and back. The soft touch causes his skin to tingle pleasantly in it's wake. He can feel the warmth of Loki's body pressed against him and more, he can feel the telltale sign of his husband’s arousal.  
  
Twisting on the bed until he is facing the god, he is immediately drawn into a needy kiss. It has been too long for both of them. Three weeks is the longest they have been apart since being married and it has felt like an eternity with the fear of possibly not being able to change Loki back looming over their heads. But now, now they are together and they can explore each other once again at their leisure. Except that doesn't seem to be what Loki has in mind.  
  
The gods movements are rushed and impatient as he moves to straddle his husband. He grinds his hips down on Steve's awakening cock until he is satisfied that the blonde is ready, then lifts his hips and takes Steve into his already prepared body. Loki rides him hard, barely allowing the blonde to recognize what is happening and it isn't long before Steve is coming deep within him.  
  
Fully awake now and staring up at his husband, Steve reaches out to stroke along the gods flushed erection trying to pleasure him. Loki pushes his hand away and begins to rock his hips, Steve still inside him and inexplicably still hard. It takes a little longer but Loki is able to coax a second orgasm out of Steve before he finally pulls off and lays down.

He is panting and sweaty, the ache in his belly now a throb. Steve knows Loki still has not come and so he reaches and takes him in hand beginning a slow stroke, the way he knows his husband likes. The god hisses at the contact as though in pain and Steve quickly withdraws his touch.  
  
"Are you ok? I didn't hurt you did I?" he asks.  
  
"I'm fine," is Loki’s terse reply.  
  
The waiver in his voice gives Steve pause and he wants to push at Loki to get a more satisfying answer but the gods hands roaming across his stomach distract him enough to make him forget to ask.  
  
Loki pushes him to his side and slips his fingers down the cleft of his ass, slowly circling his hole. The sensation causes Steve to moan. If this is what Loki wants then he is happy to comply. He loves the feeling of Loki filling him and while he isn’t sure he is capable of another orgasm just yet, the thought of Loki inside of him is still something he very much wants.  
  
The god continues to stroke and tease his opening, never quite breaching him, even after his cock has surprisingly grown hard yet again. When Loki shifts on the bed, moving to all fours, Steve realizes that he means for Steve to enter him again.

“Loki, I thought-“ he is cut off by the look of impatience that Loki casts over his shoulder.

He begins again, “are you okay?”

“I will be, just please….” The god pleads as he arches his back.

“Okay,” he responds uneasily as he presses forward.

Immediately Loki pushes back trying to get more of Steve’s length inside of him. The blonde grips his husbands hips and sets a slow pace, adjusting his angle with each glide forward, trying to find that spot that will hopefully bring him some relief.

Loki whimpers and tries to push back again, but Steve just tightens his grip and continues at his slow pace.

“Steve please….”

“Just let me….. like this…..let me….” He brings one hand up and licks his palm before reaching forward and gripping Loki’s swollen length. The god bucks beneath him and he can’t tell if its from pleasure or pain, but Loki doesn’t tell him to stop so he strokes along his cock.

When Loki lets out a long low moan, Steve knows he has finally found the gods prostate. He focuses his attention there and picks up his pace. Super soldier or not, his stamina has its limits and he feels his orgasm approaching. He holds it off as long as he can, but all too soon his body spasms in pleasure. Steve practically collapses over Loki’s back as he pants. To his great relief he can feel the wetness on his hand as a result of Loki’s release.

Pulling out slowly, knowing that Loki must be sore, Steve flops down on the bed as the god eases himself down onto his side and curls in on himself.

“You wanna tell me what that was all about?”

Loki closes his eyes and pulls in a deep breath taking stock of his body. Despite their bout of activity, he doesn’t feel nearly as hot and the ache in his belly has eased, even if it has not completely gone away.

“Loki?’

“I never meant for you to see me like that.”

“What were you afraid would happen?” Steve asks gently.

The only response he gets is a slight shrug of one slim shoulder.

“Loki, please talk to me.”

The god pulls in on himself a little more before answering, “how can you love me? Now that you have seen the truth of what I am?”

Reaching his hand out, Steve caresses the side of his husbands face, “my love is not conditional upon what you look like. You are so much more than your skin. I love you. All of you. And I want to be with you, always.”

As his body starts to heat again, Loki takes Steve’s hand and places it back on the bed. “And if I had been trapped in that skin? And we were not able to touch for fear of that skin hurting you? What then?”

“We would find a way to make it work. Nothing will keep us apart. Not our fears, not anyone else. Not even death was able to keep us apart. We will always find a way. If nothing else, have faith in me as I do in you.”

“I love you,” Loki tells him, voice wavering just a little. He shifts on the bed and wraps himself along Steve’s body. As the ache in his belly increases, he unconsciously starts to undulate his hips, rubbing against the blondes body.

“I love you too.” He falters when he realizes what Loki is doing. Right now he knows rejecting the god could do more harm than good, but his body is not recovered just yet. “Loki, I can’t…..I need a break, a shower, food……Maybe in a little while…… I’ll go make us some food. Okay?”

Loki closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, “go ahead.”

“Do you want something to eat?”

His hand goes to his stomach as he thinks about the ache in his belly, that is already coming back. Or maybe it never went away. “No, I’m fine.”

Steve frowns, but gets up anyway. His first stop is the bathroom where he showers quickly. When he emerges, Loki is laying on his side, knees drawn up and Steve can see a sheen of sweat covering the gods back. He turns on the ceiling fan before going to make breakfast.

Loki doesn’t come out of the room even after Steve has finished eating and cleaned up the kitchen so he goes back to check on him. He finds the god still on his side, but he appears to be sleeping and so he lets out a relieved sigh and then heads out into the living room.

Hours later, Loki wakes up. He feels slightly better. Not quite so hot and his stomach doesn’t hurt, only feels slightly unsettled, so he decides to get out of bed.

Steve smiles brightly when Loki emerges from the bedroom, freshly showered, “how are you feeling?”

Unconsciously, Loki’s hand goes back to his belly. “Better,” he answers as he moves to sit next to his husband.

“Good. Are you hungry? I’ll make you something to eat.”

The god has one hand on his thigh and the other against his stomach. He can feel the ache beginning to increase as perspiration starts to break out on his forehead. “Maybe some water?”

Ever the doting husband, Steve brings back a large glass of ice water and some crackers in case Loki wants them. The way Loki keeps touching his stomach and the sweating are beginning to worry Steve.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

Loki doesn’t meet Steve’s eyes when he answers, “I’ll admit, I feel a little off today. I’m sure its nothing more than exhaustion.”

“Is there anything I can do to help? Anything that will make you feel better?”

The look Loki gives him, causes a shiver to run down his spine. Something predatory comes into his eyes and Steve only has a moment before Loki is on him. The god kisses him fiercely, pushing his tongue into his mouth.

“What are you doing?” Steve asks as he pulls back as much as he can with the god straddling his lap.

Moving to nip and kiss along his husbands neck, Loki responds huskily, “I would think that would be apparent.”

Steve reaches up and pushes the god back by the shoulders, “what is going on with you?”

He isn’t prepared for the look of shear desperation on Loki’s face. “I don’t know. I just know I need you. I need to be close and feel you. I need…..”

With a wave of his hand, all of their clothes disappear and Loki begins to grind down against his husband. “I need you, Steve, please.”

“Loki, I don’t think this is a good idea.” Even as he says this, he can feel his cock reacting to the friction between their bodies.

“Please, Steve. You love me don’t you?”

“You know I do. But-“

“Then show me. Love me,” the god pleads and the shear desperation in his voice, is enough to break down any resistance Steve had left. Whatever is going on with Loki, he is determined to figure it out, but first he will show the god how very much he loves him.

Circling his arms around Loki’s waist, Steve rises from the couch. The god wraps his legs around his husband as he is carried back to the bedroom and gently laid down on the bed. Steve takes his time, running his fingers and mouth over every inch of pale flesh while Loki shudders beneath him. When he places soft kisses to the flesh on his abdomen, the god closes his eyes and sucks in a breath before placing a hand gently at the back of his lovers head. Steve shifts on the bed and slicks his fingers using the lube from the nightstand and slowly begins to prepare his lover.

He watches every expression that flits across Loki’s face while his fingers work. From the wrinkle of concentration between his eyebrows at the addition of a third finger all the way to the slackening of his mouth from pleasure as Steve works his fingers over the gods prostate. It is beautiful, Loki is beautiful and the soldier cannot stop the way tears prick at his eyes at the overwhelming feelings welling up in him.

When they are both ready, Steve slowly pushes in, one hand cradling the back of Loki’s head. “I love you.”

Loki doesn’t respond verbally. He simply opens his eyes and allows himself to be lost in Steve's blue orbs and the motion of his body. The blonde’s body starts to stutter as he nears climax and he struggles to maintain the rhythm, but Loki doesn’t care. He is right there with him and soon they are both tipping over the edge.

Steve slowly pulls out, but he stays, body laying entwined with Loki’s. The god breathes deeply and slowly, enjoying the feeling of safety and comfort. He can feel sleep pulling at him and is almost ready to surrender to it when Steve speaks.

“Was that……. Are you Ok?”

“Yes, that was perfect.”

“And how do you feel?”

Loki takes a moment to take stock. He notes the lack of ache in his belly, the way his body is not overheated. He feels normal, good, “loved.”

 


	5. Chapter 5

 

Chapter 5

 

When Steve answers the door Bucky breezes in past him and flops down on the couch, propping his feet up on the coffee table.

The blonde rolls his eyes at his friend, “better not let Loki catch you with your feet on there.” He drops down into his chair and puts his own feet up on the table with a grin.

“Speaking of, where is he? I would of thought he would be sticking close to you after all that time apart.” Bucky waggles his eyebrows comically.

Steve can feel the blush spreading across his face as he thinks about the day before. The shear need that Loki had for him.

Bucky can’t help but laugh at his friend, “look at you, blushing like a school girl. Come on Stevie, you’re married. Everyone knows you guys do the deed.”

“Do the deed? Really Bucky? And just because we’re married doesn’t mean I want to talk about our relations!”

“Relations….” Bucky snorts. “Nat and Sam and I talk about your relations all the time,” Bucky laughs again. He didn’t think it could happen, but the blush on Steve’s face gets even darker, which only makes him want to tease him more.

“Remember that time in India? That cheap little hotel? The walls were paper thin. We could hear everything.”

There is no way for Steve’s face to get any redder, so he slouches down in his chair and covers his face with his hands, “everything?”

“E-ver-y-thing,” Bucky responds, drawing out each syllable to emphasize his point. “Last fourth of July, when you two disappeared during your birthday party? I found you on the roof.”

 _Oh my god_. Steve knows exactly what they were doing on the roof. When they came back down, he was grateful that the fireworks were starting so no one would be able to see the dirt on the knees of his pants or notice that he had untucked his shirt to cover the wet spot on the front. “Wait, what do you mean you found us?”

“I went up looking for you and…. Well you know what I saw.”

Steve groans, “and you never said anything?”

“Nah, figured I’d save it until just the right moment.” He doesn’t have time to duck as a pillow hits him square in the face. “Hey, its not like I brought up that time in New Mexico. With the rental car? Thank god for leather upholstery. but even then, none of us wanted to sit in the back seats.”

“Oh god….”

“Nat was pretty impressed with how flexible Loki is,” Bucky cannot stop the fit of giggles that overcomes him when he see’s Steve expression. He is laughing so hard he doesn’t even try to avoid the second pillow that comes at his head.

Steve watches his friend laughing at his expense and cracks a smile, “he is pretty flexible,” he admits, which only makes Bucky laugh even more, as the blonde gets up to grab them both a couple of beers.

When he finally settles down, Bucky turns serious, “how’s he doing?”

It takes a few moments for Steve to answer, “I’m not sure. He’s not blue, so there’s that, but its like he’s sick or something. And he ummmm,” he raises his hand and rubs the back of his neck, “hekeptwantingtohavesex.”

He runs the last few words together, knowing he is only asking for more grief from his friend, regarding his sex life.

“So, have sex with him.”

“I did. But he kept………….”

The flicker of a smile, along with the raised finger to keep Steve quiet until Bucky is able to speak without laughing, irritates the blonde.

“I’m serious Buck. Now he’s just sleeping. Has been since yesterday afternoon.”

“Ok. Did you talk to Strange? Is he having side effects from the spell? Or maybe from being blue?”

“He said he didn’t find anything in the spell book so its possible its from being a frost giant.” Steve sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “The thing is, I just don’t know.”

“Maybe you need to talk to Frigga.”

“I thought of that, but I don’t know how to contact Asgard.” Steve turns his head towards the bedroom. Bucky can see the tightness around his mouth, the tired look in his eyes.

“You can’t get Heimdall’s attention? You are the Prince Consort of Asgard, god that’s weird to say……, I would think he would listen,” Bucky tries to reason.

Steve looks back to the bedroom door, “if he isn’t better by tomorrow, I’ll give it a try.”

 

When Loki wakes the next afternoon, Steve is immediately at his side. He checks his husband over carefully, touching his skin to check for fever.

“How are you feeling,” Steve asks.

The god smiles and tries to answer reassuringly, “I’m fine love.”

Steve isn’t sure he believes Loki, but doesn’t know how to say that without potentially upsetting him.  “How about some food, you’ve got to be hungry.”

He is hungry, but his stomach does a little flip at the though and so he declines and tries to ignore the look of displeasure on his husbands face. “I will take some water though,” he offers to placate him.

Rushing out into the kitchen, Steve gets a glass of water and takes it into the god. He watches as Loki takes a small sip and then sets the glass on the bedside table. He won’t push, but he will keep a close on eye him. “Why don’t we go out to the living room? We can watch a movie or something.”

The slight pause before Loki answers only adds to Steve’s level of concern, “okay, that sounds good.”

“You go on and get comfortable, I’ll be right in with some blankets and pillows.” Steve watches the god get up and walk in to the living room. He takes note of the way his hand gravitates to his stomach, with a slight frown.

Sitting on the couch, with Loki curled up against him is nice. And he is relieved to feel that the god is no longer running a fever, but he still has yet to eat anything and every so often, his hand moves back over his belly.

When the movie is over, the blonde gets up and heats up some soup. He brings it to the living room along with some crackers and sets it pointedly down in front of the god, quirking an eyebrow in challenge. Loki knows Steve is worried about him, and in fact he is worried as well, but doesn’t want to admit it. He reaches out and picks up a cracker, taking a tentative bite. Thankfully, the bland taste and light salt do not cause his stomach to rebel and so he proceeds to slowly eat a handful.

Steve watches him out of the corner of his eye, its not enough, but its something and so he decides to hold off on contacting Asgard, for now.

 

A week later and not much has changed. Loki has mostly been surviving on crackers and chicken broth, with the occasional piece of fruit thrown in on good days. Steve knows the god is not sleeping well and his worry grows each day until Loki stumbles, getting out of bed on the eighth day. Jumping up, Steve helps him lay back down and gets him settled back under the blankets. Once he is sure the god is dozing, he heads out to the back yard, where he calls on Heimdall.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The incident on the roof is described in detail over in "The first of many... Getting Caught." If you are interested.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can a super soldier even have a panic attack?

 

Chapter 6

 

Frigga sits beside the bed in Steve and Loki’s home. She has her hand on his forehead and is trying to use her magic to determine what could be wrong with her son as he sleeps. Steve stands behind her, eyes drawn together in worry.

“I cannot find anything amiss. No illness that I can determine, but he is weakened.” She frowns and withdraws her hand before turning to her son in law. “You said his magic was suppressed?”

“Yeah, it made him revert to his Jotun form.” He can’t help but notice the worried expression that flits across Frigga’s face.

“For how long?”

“About 3 weeks. I went to Dr. Strange and we used a spell to help him change back.” He glances back to his sleeping husband, “did we do something wrong?”

The Queen smiles kindly at the blonde, “no, you did nothing wrong, but I do think it may be best if we take him to Asgard, just so the healers can take a look at him.”

Now the stress of seeing his husband ailing, is coupled with guilt at the thought that he may have inadvertently done something to harm him.

“When did you want to leave?” He asks.

“How quickly can you be ready?”

“I only need a few minutes. Let me pack a bag real quick and call Bucky.”

“Very well, please make preparations and I will keep watch over Loki.”

With a nod of his head, he goes into the closet and retrieves a bag. Throwing in some of his and Loki’s clothes, he then gathers a few more items that he may need or want, since he is not sure how long they will be on Asgard. When he is done, he goes out to the living room to call his friend.

“What’s up Stevie? How’s Loki?”

The blonde takes a deep breath, “not any better. Frigga and I are taking him back to Asgard so the healers can take a look at him.”

Bucky can hear the strain in his friends voice and so he does his best to encourage him. “That’s good. I mean look what they did with my arm. They’ll have him up and around in no time.”

“I’m sure you’re right,” Steve agrees, even though he sounds unconvincing even to himself.  “Any luck finding someone to take a look at that suppressor?”

“Not yet. It’s pretty complicated tech and there are only a handful of people that would even be able to figure it out and even less of them that can be trusted, but Nat’s got another lead she is going to look into.”

“Thanks Buck, I better get going.”

“Yeah, hey, no problem. Take care Steve. See you when you get back.”

He disconnects the call and turns back to the bedroom where he finds Frigga standing in the doorway. “I’m ready if you are.”

“I never asked how you were feeling. Did you have any ill effects from the suppressor? It must have been very distressing for you, so new to your magic.”

“I’m fine. It wasn’t pleasant, but once it came back, I was okay. That’s why I’m so worried about Loki.”

“You’re a good boy Steve. Loki is very lucky to have you.”

Steve blushes and ducks his head, “thank you. But I feel like I’m the lucky one.”

 

This time when the bifrost drops them in the observatory, Steve is able to keep his footing, despite carrying Loki in his arms. The god was roused briefly getting him out of bed, but otherwise has been mostly still sleeping.

They take a carriage to the palace and Steve carries Loki directly to the healers chambers.

“Why don’t you go back to yours and Loki’s rooms and get some rest. I will send for you when there is news.”

“If its all the same to you, I would rather stay here.”

Frigga smiles at the blonde and gestures to a chair in the corner of the room. His refusal to leave does not surprise her in the least and in fact, his devotion to her son pleases her greatly. Steve takes the offered seat and settles in for what is likely going to be a long wait.

 

It is many hours later when Steve snaps back awake, immediately irritated with himself for falling asleep. Frigga glances at him briefly before turning back to the table where Loki is laying. The familiar glowing of the soul forge is suspended above his body as the healers move about looking at different points. After several minutes, she steps back from the table.

“Steve why don’t you go get something to eat. This is still likely to take several more hours at least.”

“I would rather-“

Frigga looks disapprovingly at the blonde and cuts him off, “I would like to get something to eat and I would appreciate it if you would accompany me. “

He knows better than to argue with the Queen of Asgard about this and so he stands and offers his arm to her.  Even though he is impatient to get back to Loki, he quickly realizes just how hungry he is and proceeds to devour a large amount of food. 

When Frigga finally relents and allows herself to be lead back to the healing chambers, Steve can tell that something has changed as soon as they enter. One of the healers points out several places on the soul forge to the Queen, who furrows her brows in concentration.

Without turning around, she addresses Steve, “tell me more about the spell you used to help Loki turn back into his Aesir form.”

Even though he has no idea what he is looking at, Steve moves to stand beside her and recounts everything he can about the spell. Frigga does not speak until he is finished and only then to ask additional questions.

“How did he act immediately after?”

“Umm….. he….ummm…..” his face grows red as he thinks about how aggressive Loki was in bed. “He was running a fever. And um, I think his stomach was bothering him. He kept touching it. And then he wouldn’t eat and started sleeping a lot.”

“And what else aren’t you telling me?” Frigga presses, her expression making it clear that not answering is not an option.

 _Why does everyone want to talk about my sex life?_ “He was aggressive. In bed.” He mumbles the last out as he ducks his head in embarrassment.

She turns her attention back to the soul forge, sparing him any additional humiliation and points at a spot directly over Loki’s abdomen. “This is the cause of Loki’s distress. The spell you used to help him turn back was not complete. Some of his organs remained in his Frost Giant form.”

She can see the guilt as it washes over his features causing his shoulders to slump, “I made things worse didn’t I? I should have brought him to Asgard immediately.”

“You did nothing wrong. I believe Loki’s body would have eventually reverted to his Aesir form, but that may have taken some time, since he has never made the change intentionally.”

Steve reaches a hand up, wanting to brush a strand of hair back from his husbands face, but quickly withdraws it. “So what is causing him to be like this?”

“It would appear that his body is attempting to complete the transformation, but something is blocking it.”

His attention is focused on Loki as he tries to follow the explanation. His eyes keep being drawn back to the image of the soul forge where the healers had been pointing and he begins to feel queasy. He can hear his blood rushing in his ears and his vision begins to swim out of focus as his heart beats faster and faster. He tries to concentrate on what Frigga is saying, but his mind keeps flitting around, replaying the scenes from the last week and a half.

_…..his body is in a state of extreme exhaustion…….._

Steve can’t focus, can’t take it all in. He looks back at Loki’s face.

_…..called for the All Father……Gungnir….._

His eyes skate back to Frigga, but narrow in confusion. _What is she trying to say? Am I having an asthma attack?_

_…….stop the transformation…… may lose……._

_…..babies…._

“What?” For just a moment Steve thinks he heard clearly, but surely that can’t be right. There isn’t time to figure it out as his vision goes black and he hits the floor.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Super short chapter. Just being mean to poor Steve again.

Chapter 7

Steve jerks awake with a terrible smell in his nose. The urge to vomit is overwhelming, but begins to recede almost immediately. He pulls himself up to a sitting position just in time to see Frigga step away and discard what must have been something similar to the smelling salts used on Earth. He can feel his face burn with embarrassment as he pushes himself up to his feet. 

“How long was I out?”

“Only a few moments,” Frigga responds just as the the chamber doors are opened and the All Father steps through, holding his staff in his hand.

The older man steps up to the table where Loki’s body is still laying and begins to look over the images hovering above. Steve can only watch and listen as the Queen explains the situation. At the mention of babies, Odin briefly turns his eye towards his son in law before returning his attention back to Loki. When he addresses Steve, he doesn’t look up.

“Loki’s body cannot stay in this state of transition for much longer. I can stop it using Gungnir, but I am unsure if he will be able to make the change necessary to bear children in the future on his own.”

“And if you change him back to the way he was, what happens to the babies?”

“They will not survive.”

Steve can feel his heart already breaking at the thought of losing these precious lives that he has not even begun to know. 

“And if you do this, we may not be able to have children in the future?” He asks for clarification.

“If nothing is done, the babies will not live and you may also lose Loki.”

“So the babies will die no matter which decision I make? I can either choose to do nothing and they will die as his body eventually makes the change on its own and I may lose Loki in the process, or I can choose to change him now and the babies will……..” He looks around the room and makes his way over to the chair in the corner. He sits and holds his head in his hands. “Our children….,” he cries, “I know the logical choice, but I just can’t tell you to do something that I know will kill them.”

He can feel his dreams for the future slipping through his fingers, 3 kids, someone special, but he cannot focus on that right now. 

It is Frigga who speaks up, questioning her husband, “If you can stop the change, can you not leave him as he is?”

Odin looks at the blonde man. “Would you ask me to keep Loki’s body in its partial Jotun form?”

Steve’s head jerks up and he leaps to his feet to stand directly in front of the imposing figure of the All Father. “Is it possible?” The spark of hope that threatens to take hold is almost overwhelmed by the anger with Odin for not suggesting this possibility in the first place. 

“I can essentially fuse him into this form, but is that what you want? He will not be able to change back and will not be able to shift to his complete Jotun form. He will be trapped in a body that is partially Aesir and partially Jotun.”

“Yes! Of course that’s what I want. If you can save him and the babies, then do it!”

“Very well. Be it on your head, for forcing this upon Loki.”

“Then I’ll be the one to face the consequences, but at least my family will be alive for it to happen.”

The shear determination on the blondes face is enough to convince the All Father and so he raises Gungnir as everyone holds their breath.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really do like Steve, so I'm not sure why I'm so mean to him all the time.

 

Chapter 8

 

The All Father lowers Gungnir back to his side and leaves without saying a word. Steve watches him go before turning his gaze to his mother in law.

“That’s it? Is it done?”

“Yes, there is nothing more to be done here. Loki’s body will need time to recover from the strain it has been under. I would suggest moving him back to your rooms.”

The few healers left in the room begin to shut down the various pieces of equipment. The last being the soul forge where Steve gets one final look at the two tiny spots that he now knows are his twin babies. He gathers Loki up in his arms and exits the room with Frigga right behind him.

The Queen opens the door to their own rooms and allows Steve to carry the god in and gently place him on the bed. Before she goes she offers a bit of advice, “Steve, I know that your decision was made out of love. And Loki will understand that too, in time. Be patient, but be prepared, he will have much to adjust to, as will you. For what its worth, I am grateful that you chose as you did.”

He gives a wan smile and small nod of his head as she slips out of the room. Taking advantage of the opportunity, he strips off his clothing and quickly bathes before dressing in pajama pants and climbing into bed beside his husband. Unable to resist himself, he places a hand protectively on Loki’s lower abdomen just above where his future children are nestled. It doesn’t take long for him to decide that isn’t enough and he carefully removes Loki’s shirt before laying back down with his ear pressed against the gods belly, where he pretends that he can hear twin hearts beating fast and strong.

It is only when the god stirs beneath him that Steve realizes he must have fallen asleep. He sits up and watches Loki blink his eyes open, unable to keep the relieved grin off his face.

“How are you feeling?” he asks when he thinks Loki is alert enough to answer.

“Well enough.” The gods eyes dart around the room as he pushes himself up to sit against the headboard of the bed. “Why are we are on Asgard?”

“You were sick and so your mother and I brought you to the healers.” The flash of panic that crosses Loki’s features causes Steve to rush ahead. “But you’re fine now. Odin, uh, healed you.”

The god narrows his eyes in suspicion at the slight hesitation in Steve’s voice. “What do you mean, he healed me?”

“Well, you remember not being able to shift back after you changed into your Jotun form?”

“Yeeees,” Loki answers with a growing sense of unease.

“Ok, good. And we used that spell to help you change back right?”

“Uh huh.”

“And then you got sick until we brought you here.”

Loki is beginning to lose his patience as his husband keeps drawing this out. Clearly there is something the blonde is hesitant to tell him. “Out with it Rogers. What did Odin do.”

Steve winces at the use of his surname. He knows Loki only uses it when he is truly irritated with him, the only consolation being that he didn’t call him Captain. Taking Loki’s hand, he tries his best to explain, “the spell didn’t fully change you back. A lot of your organs were left in your Jotun form. Your body was trying to complete the change and that was what was making you sick.”

The relief Loki feels at the explanation is short lived as he watches his husband begin to fidget nervously. “What else aren’t you telling me?”

Steve can hear the touch of anger that is creeping into Loki’s voice the longer this conversation continues. “You have to understand, there wasn’t much time. I had to make a decision. If I had him change you back completely, we probably wouldn’t have been able to have kids later-“

“What did you do?” Loki cuts him off, alarm bells ringing in his head.

“He stabilized you.”

“What did you do?” he demands, voice raising as his agitation grows.

“He fused your body so you can’t shift between forms. The parts of you that were Jotun will stay that way.”

Steve can see the horror as it creeps across his husbands face. He doesn’t miss the way the god looks down at his body. And when Loki looks back up at him, the anger in his eyes, causes him to stand up from the bed and back several steps away.

“You made this decision, did this to me, without my knowledge.”

“I had to Loki, our kids-“

“You force me into this mixed up, half bastard form, with no way to change back out of it……. Do you not understand the violation to my body? To my very self?” Loki rises off the bed and stalks towards the soldier. “I had resigned myself to being in this form temporarily to carry your children, I would have done that for you. But you have taken that choice from me!”

“I had to! I couldn’t risk losing you or the babies!”

“If I had been stuck in my Aesir form we could have found another way to have kids Steve.” He runs a hand through his dark hair and tries to take a calming breath. “Do you not see how selfish this was?”

“Yes, I know exactly how selfish it was!” Steve shouts. “I wasn’t willing to give you or our children up. And I would do it again if I had to,” he adds softly as he cautiously approaches the god.

“When we were ready we could have found another way!”

Steve is completely taken aback by Loki’s reaction. He knew the god would not be happy, but this intense anger is more than he ever expected. He takes the last 2 steps to close the distance between them and drops to his knees where he wraps his arms around his husbands waist and rests his head against the spot where those precious lives are cradled.

“I did it for our children. These children. The ones you carry now. I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you or them.” He can feel the tears as they begin to fall. “And I’m sorry that I forced this on you, but what else could I have done?” He doesn’t even try to hold back the sobs as they come. “I couldn’t tell Odin to kill them and that was the only way to make you fully Aesir.” He falls back on to his heels and covers his face with his hands in his grief, “I’m sorry.” No other words come as he succumbs to his tears.

Loki says nothing as he watches Steve cry. He turns his magic inward and there he finds the truth of his husbands words. Two tiny lives, barely more than a spark, but definitely there. His hand immediately goes to his abdomen to rest protectively above them as he moves back to sit on the edge of the bed.

“I think I would like to be alone,” he whispers.

The heartbreak on Steve’s face when he looks up is almost too much, but Loki cannot deal with it right now. He needs time to think, time to process his anger, his fear and maybe even a small sense of wonder.

Steve nods and stands, moving closer just long enough to lean in for a kiss. He tries not to let his hurt show when Loki turns his head and his lips only brush across the gods cheek, but that does not stop him from placing a hand over the one Loki has on his stomach. “I love you. All of you.”

He turns and walks out of the room, closing the door quietly behind himself. Then he heads directly to the room that Bucky uses when he is on Asgard. Not even aware that he is still only clad in his pajama bottoms, he throws himself down on the bed and lets out a wail of despair just before the tears start to flow again.

All his life he had this fantasy of finding out that he was going to be a father. The specifics varied, but the idea was always the same. There would be tears of joy, words spoken of love and excitement for the future and when a sense of calm returned there would be lovemaking to express the depth of emotions shared between them.

Not this, this ugly feeling of fear that he might lose everything. He has to keep reminding himself of his words to Odin.

_“Be it on your head, for forcing this upon Loki.”_

_“Then I’ll be the one to face the consequences, but at least my family will be alive for it to happen.”_

They are alive and until Loki is ready to forgive him, it will have to be enough.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki gains a little perspective.

 

Chapter 9

 

When Steve wakes he is immediately conscious of the fact that it is early morning, based on the light streaming through the open window.  Sitting up in bed, he tries to think about the best course of action. Loki has not come to him or sent word that he should come back to their rooms. He considers seeking out Frigga, but aware of the fact that he is still wearing only his sleep pants and while he may not have been raised a prince, he has enough sense to know not to roam around the palace like that.

In the end, he decides to go back to his own room, but when he finds himself standing in front of the door, he hesitates. He doesn’t want to fight with Loki anymore, but he raises his hand and knocks lightly despite the way his stomach twists. When there is no answer, he uses his magic to unlock the wards used to secure it and quietly steps in.

He isn’t sure what he expected, but certainly not the sight he is greeted by. The room is in shambles. Furniture overturned, books strewn about, pieces of what used to be clothing in shreds on the floor and glass. Broken glass everywhere. For just a moment his heart skips a beat, concerned that Loki has been attacked, but as he takes a closer look around he can see the damage looks deliberate and he knows Loki, and only Loki, is the cause.

The god is not in their rooms and so Steve quickly grabs a change of clothes and heads back to Bucky’s room. He tells himself that he is giving Loki his space and refuses to admit that he is scared to face him. Changing his clothes, he heads out to the training fields hoping to clear his head, or at least distract himself for awhile.

Hours later he is bruised and bloodied, but his mind still turns to his husband and so he makes his way back to their rooms.  Once again he knocks on the door and once again he finds the rooms empty when he enters. Nothing has changed since he was there this morning. He bathes and changes clothes then sits on the bed to wait. This only lasts a few minutes before he gets up and starts to clean up the mess. He rights the furniture, puts away the books and other items that are not too damaged, attempts to use his magic to fix those he can and throws the rest away.

Even after all that, Loki has still not come back and so he gives up and goes in search of the Queen. He finds her sitting in her garden, tossing crumbs to brightly colored fish in a pond.

“Steve,” she greets without looking up.

He takes a few steps forward, “have you seen Loki?”

Frigga smiles and pats the bench beside her, waiting for her son in law to sit before she answers. “Not since this morning. He is angry. Understandably so.”

Steve hangs his head, “I really messed up didn’t I?”

The Queen shifts and pulls him into a hug, wrapping him in her warmth. He in turn, rests his head on her shoulder, much like a child. “You did the right thing. Often times the right thing is not the easy thing to do, but you will get through this.”

“I just want to move past this. We should be happy and celebrating and instead I slept alone in Bucky’s room and now I don’t even know where he is.”

“Life rarely gives us what we want Steve.”

“It gave me Loki,” Steve responds so earnestly that Frigga has to smile.

“Yes it did. But the journey to get to this place has not been an easy one. For either of you.”

They sit in silence for awhile, occasionally throwing crumbs to the fish, watching them surface and splash back under with a flip of their large tails.

It is Steve who finally stands to leave, “I should go. I’m sure you have other things to do than coddle me.” He tries to smile, as his eyes dart to the side, but it comes across as more of a grimace.

Frigga follows his gaze and nods in agreement. “Go to the dining hall. You cannot afford to skip any more meals.”

He starts to protest, but stops at the stern look the Queen gives him. “Yes ma’am. I’ll go right now.”

Once she is sure Steve has left the garden, she calls out, “how long were you planning on standing there?”

Loki emerges from behind a group of hedges and takes Steve’s place beside his mother. “Only until he left. I am not ready to talk to him.”

“Well then consider yourself lucky that he had the grace to leave, when he saw you hiding there. Come, walk with me.”

She stands and leads Loki back into the palace. They walk the halls until they arrive at the great library. Once inside, Frigga leads her son to a back corner where the oldest texts are kept. A large wooden table, ancient from the looks of it, dominates the center of the space. The Queen passes by, trailing a hand over the wood, before pulling one of the large books off a shelf. Choosing to sit in one of the two leather chairs just beyond the table, she opens the book and begins to slowly turn pages, her attention solely focused on the book in her lap.

Loki watches her for several minutes until he can no longer stand the silence. “You understand why I am angry with him don’t you?”

“I understand that you are angry. And that you are directing it towards your husband,” she responds as she continues to turn pages.

“Of course I am! How am I supposed to forget what he did to me?”

“I don’t expect you to forget it. I expect you to move past it.” Still she turns pages, not looking up.

“How? How am I supposed to get past it? He forced this change on me that I didn’t want. And now I am stuck like this! I had no say in the matter!”

Finally she looks up at her youngest son, “No Loki you did not and that is terrible, but your anger is misplaced. If you must be angry, then be angry at Odin and myself for lying to you all these years about who you are, be angry at Laufey for abandoning you, be angry at all of Asgard for the hatred and prejudice that permeates our realm, be angry that we made you hate yourself so much that you cannot accept this change, but do not be angry with Steve for wanting to save you and your unborn children. To Steve it makes no difference that you are Jotun.  All that matters to him is not losing his family.”

Loki is quiet for a moment, then softly he says, “it wasn’t his decision to make. It is my body.”

Frigga stands and holds the book out in front of her, “this book contains a spell that can reverse what has been done to you. With it, I can turn you Aesir and you will no longer be Jotun.”

For just a moment Loki’s eyes flash with hope before they dull again and his hand moves to his belly, “what of the babies?”

“They will not survive.”

“No! I can’t-“ he begins before Frigga cuts him off.

“Yes you can Loki. You can undo this, rid yourself of this part of yourself that you hate.” She pushes the book towards him, forcing him to take it.

“I can’t! I won’t kill these babies! Not just so I…….” he trails off, looking at the book in his hand.

Frigga reaches out and takes the book back, setting it on the table, before pulling him into her arms. “And neither could Steve.”

When Loki steps back, he picks up the book, examining the cover. “This isn’t a spell book.” He flips through several pages before looking back up at his smiling mother. “This is a book of children’s stories.”

Leaning slightly forward she looks at the book, “so it is. You should take it and show Steve, I imagine he would love to read it to your children when they arrive.”

He smiles at the image that comes to his mind, “thank you mother.”

She flashes him a bright smile, before turning serious once again, “I know this is not going to be easy for you, but you must come to terms with who you are, with your heritage. Your children will share this in common with you, but once you hold them in your arms, you will love them unconditionally, as I did when I first held you. And maybe that will help you to learn to love yourself as well.”

 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Loki have a few things to work out.

 

 

Chapter 10

 

Loki returns to his and Steve’s rooms, hoping to find his husband. He is disappointed to see that Steve is not there, but the fact that the room has been cleaned up lets him know that the blonde was there at some point during the day.

The god knows his husband well enough that he can guess where he might be and so he immediately heads to the training grounds. As expected, he finds the blonde sparring. Loki takes a moment to admire the sight before moving out into the open where Steve is sure to see him. As soon as the blonde looks up, he spots Loki and in his moment of distraction, his opponent lands a hard blow to his chest, knocking him off his feet.

Steve stands up and brushes himself off before congratulating his opponent on winning their match. He excuses himself and cautiously approaches the god.

“You are in desperate need of a bath,” Loki tells him, an attempt at levity that falls flat.

Steve can’t help but notice the awkwardness between them, but is relieved that Loki is at least talking to him. “I’ll take that under advisement,” he tries to joke back.

The two men stand there on the training grounds, unsure of how to proceed. Both knowing that they need to talk about what has transpired, but afraid to begin the argument anew.

It is Steve who breaks the silence. “I think I’ll go take that bath now, wash some of this sweat off.”

“Good idea. If you don’t mind, I will accompany you back to our room?” The god offers.

The smile that breaks across Steve’s face gives away the relief he feels at something so simple as going back to their room together.

“Have you eaten?” Loki asks.

“Not much,” the blonde admits as he tries to ignore the hunger pains that erupt at just the thought of food.

“Then I shall go to the kitchens and bring something for us back to the room. You go on ahead and bathe and I will join you shortly.”

Steve takes a chance and leans in to quickly press a kiss to Loki’s cheek before heading to their room, while Loki turns down a side hall towards the kitchen. Once in the room, Steve fills the bath with water and strips out of his sweaty clothes. Even though the warm water feels good on his tense muscles, he rushes through cleaning himself and then dresses in a set of sleep pants and a t-shirt.

When he emerges from the bathroom, he finds Loki sitting at the small dining table with a tray of food in front of him. His stomach rumbles embarrassingly loud causing Loki to smirk. They eat in near silence with Loki pushing the majority of the food towards his husband, mindful of Frigga’s earlier admonishment of Steve for not eating enough.

As Steve finishes eating and pushes the tray of food away, Loki stands and goes to sit on the bed with his back against the headboard. He beckons for Steve to come sit beside him and the blonde goes willingly, hopeful that Loki will forgive him.

“I spoke with mother today,” Loki begins, looking down at his hands. “She helped me to understand why you chose what you did.” He flicks his eyes up to the blonde, before looking back down again. “I realize now that there was no other choice for you to make. And I am grateful that you chose to save our children.”

“Thank you,” Steve tells him, reaching out to take his hand. “I am truly sorry for forcing this on you. I know that you……are not comfortable with your other form.”

Loki chuckles humorlessly, “uncomfortable is a bit of an understatement. I meant it when I said I never wanted you to see me that way. Asgard has long held its hatred of the Jotun close. It is ingrained into my psyche to hate them and those feelings do not simply vanish overnight. That form is a constant reminder of everything I aspired and failed to be as an Aesir prince of Asgard. A reminder that I will never be more than the monster of children’s stories.”

“But you are not a monster. You are the most amazing person that I have ever met. You are beautiful and smart and kind and loving and magic and so many other things. You are everything. You have given me so much, your love, your magic, your very life and now this,” he says laying a hand gently on Loki’s abdomen. “I don’t know how anyone could ever see you as anything other than miraculous.”

Loki reaches a hand up and cups the side of Steve’s face and the blonde immediately leans in to the touch. “Steve, your words are almost enough to convince me, but even you know, it is difficult to forget the truth of who we are.” He withdraws his touch and watches Steve closely.

The blonde can feel the change as soon as Loki pulls his hand back. His lungs feel tight, making it hard to draw in a breath. Looking down, he can see the narrow chest and too thin arms and legs of his pre serum self. He opens his mouth to demand that Loki change him back, but stops himself before he shows just how much of a hypocrite he is.

And he understands. He understands the self loathing. The inability to see beyond your flaws, beyond the perceptions of the world around you. The internalized hatred that cannot be overcome no matter how hard you try to prove yourself.  And even now, 70 years removed from this body, he cannot deny that he still hates it.

Before he can react, Loki leans in and kisses his lips, placing a hand on the back of this head, pulling him in. The god notes the stiffness of Steve’s posture, the way he holds back and tries to draw away. He breaks the kiss, but does not move away, “you are beautiful to me. In all forms, but I can see that you do not believe it to be true.”

He sits back against the head board again. Loki waves his hand and Steve is back in his post serum body, but the tightness in his chest remains and his muscles feel weak. “Now imagine being trapped this way for the rest of your life. To look at you, one would never know what is inside. But you know and you hate it.”

And he is right. Steve does hate it. Loki can see the anguish in his lovers eyes and with another gesture he restores Steve’s health. “Know that I love you, in all your forms, just as I am trying to accept that you love me in all of mine.”

He leans in again and brushes his lips across Steve’s. Once, twice and then again before drawing back. Loki slowly works Steve’s clothing off of his body, pausing to lick and kiss across his warm skin. After pulling off his own clothes, Loki shifts them both until he is laying on top of the soldier.

They take their time exploring each other and if Steve’s breath hitches every time his hands or lips near Loki’s belly, he cannot help it.

Later as he lays pressed against Loki’s side relishing the calm relaxation that comes as his heart rate slows and the sweat from their lovemaking dries on his body, Loki takes the blonde’s hand and places it on his belly, covering it with his own.

“Steve, you’re going to be a father…..”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An extremely sappy chapter, but it had to happen. Loki still isn't ok with being stuck in his part Jotun form, but now that Steve understands where he is coming from, they should be able to work through both of their issues. Maybe. 
> 
> Hopefully next chapter I can get back to the actual plot.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally getting back to the plot.

 

 

Chapter 11

 

Its been a week and Loki is ready to go home. Not that he doesn’t enjoy spending time with his mother, but Asgard just isn’t home anymore. He is tired of being poked and prodded by the healers as they check and recheck his and the babies health. The fact that he tells them repeatedly that he feels fine, apparently has no bearing on their actions. And Steve…. He has been no help at all, so incredibly patient with the testing, which is easy for him, as he gets to just stand there and hold the gods hand.

When they finally decide that he is well enough to travel on the bifrost, he immediately heads back to his rooms with Steve in tow. His bags have been packed for two days and so he figures they can say their goodbyes and be gone within the hour. When he turns the corner to the hallway leading to his rooms and finds Frigga waiting by the door, he knows that is not likely to happen.

She smiles as the couple approaches, “I understand the testing went well.”

“Yes, they said I can go home. We’re hoping to leave right away,” Loki tells her, trying to ignore the way her smile falters for just a moment.

“Yes, I’m sure you’re anxious to sleep in your own bed on Midgard. I had hoped you would stay a little longer. I have missed you terribly and now with this…..” she trails off.

Steve speaks up, hoping to make this easier on both mother and son, “We’ll be back, several times before the babies come, I’m sure. Right Loki?” he looks to his husband for confirmation.

“Of course,” he agrees readily. “I am sure we will have many questions. This is all so new and I doubt there are any doctors on Midgard that can over see this pregnancy, even if I did trust them.”

“And you can always come visit. Help us set up a nursery?” Steve offers, right before his mind latches on to what Loki has said. Loki will need care throughout the pregnancy. Now that he is thinking about it, his mind is racing with questions.

“I would like that,” Frigga responds. “I had wanted to share some books with you about The Jotunheim, but if you can wait until after dinner to leave, I can have them ready so you can take them home.”

Steve turns and is relieved to see Loki nod his agreement.

“We shall see you at dinner then. Thank you mother.”

 

Steve wasn’t sure what he expected, but the four large books Frigga gave him along with the large leather bound one Loki had, were not it. He will have a lot of reading to do. He glances through each one briefly, surprised and pleased to see that the leather one is in fact full of children’s stories. It is this, more than anything else that truly makes this feel real. That one, he takes and places in the room that will be converted from a guest room into a nursery.

That night as they lay in bed, Steve runs his hand over Loki’s abdomen. “This is real,” he says, clearly in awe.

Loki smiles and pulls Steve in for a kiss that quickly becomes heated as it often does with them. It is only a matter of minutes before they are both naked, touching and kissing. When Loki reaches for the lube and begins to prepare Steve, the blonde arches an eyebrow, but makes no move to stop him. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he had assumed that since Loki was carrying the babies he wouldn’t be interested in topping, but clearly that is not the case, much to Steve’s pleasure.

Seeing the unspoken question on Steve’s face Loki tells him, “at some point I won’t be able to do this, so I plan on taking full advantage while I can.” Loki gives his husband a mischievous grin which Steve answers with a smirk as he relaxes back into the bed.

“Then by all means……ahhhh….” He cuts off with a cry of pure pleasure as Loki strokes his fingers across his prostate.

“You were saying?” Loki teases.

Planting his feet on the bed, Steve raises his hips off the bed and begins to fuck himself on Loki’s long fingers. “God Loki……please………”

Hearing Steve beg makes Loki’s already hard cock throb with want. Pulling his fingers out, he grabs Steve by the hips and pulls him forward, pushing his legs up as he thrusts in with one solid movement. The blonde gasps at the sudden intrusion before moaning out his husband’s name.

Loki pulls out and pushes back in quickly, relishing the feeling of being sheathed in Steve’s body. He fully plans on having Steve in this position and any other he can think of until his belly necessitates he stop. But for now….. Loki pushes Steve’s knees up to his chest and shifts forward for leverage as he increases the force of his thrusts. The resulting moan from the blonde sends a pulse of heat to his groin, pushing him closer to the edge.

Working a hand between them, Steve starts to stroke himself in time to Loki’s thrusts. The growl that Loki gives, along with the pulsing warmth of his seed as he comes, is enough to bring Steve’s orgasm on as well.

 

When Steve calls Bucky to let him know they are back, he tries to explain why Loki was sick as best he can without mentioning the babies. This is something he wants to tell his best friend in person and so he invites Bucky over for dinner.

As expected, Bucky is beyond excited and if he is honest with himself, even a little jealous. The couple swear him to secrecy, not wanting too many people to know just yet. Once the general excitement dies down the conversation turns to Hydra and the magic suppressors.

“Was Nat able to make any progress on getting them analyzed?” Steve asks.

“Nothing as of a couple of days ago. She is supposed to stop by when she gets back from where ever she is now. Hopefully she’ll have something.”

Steve gets up and pulls 2 beers and a bottle of water out of the refrigerator. He hands 1 beer to Bucky and the water to Loki before sitting back on the couch and opening his own beer.

“We need to move on this as soon as possible. I don’t like the idea of those suppressors getting in anyone else’s hands, especially now,” he says with a meaningful glance in Loki’s direction. “Even with Loki out of the field for the indefinite future, I don’t want to take the risk.”

The god cocks his head to the side, “what do you mean, out of the field? Surely you don’t expect me to sit idly by like some maiden while you go out and put yourself at risk? Need I remind you that you are also vulnerable to those devices? And that I am stronger and faster than you even without my magic?”

Steve frowns before carefully thinking over his response, “I know you are capable even without your magic, but I am not willing to risk the babies health.” The scowl that comes over Loki’s features lets Steve know that he is not going to get out of this easily. “Look, maybe we should discuss this later,” he offers, casting a glance at Bucky.

“Yes of course,” is the gods terse reply.

Bucky steers the conversation away from Hydra and into safer territory, nurseries and baby names, _‘please tell me you won’t be getting a minivan.’_ And the tension slowly eases.

After Bucky leaves, with another fierce hug to both men, Steve turns to his husband, “I think we should hold off on making any decisions right now about your being in the field. We don’t have any solid information yet to go on.”

He can see that Loki is getting ready to protest and so he pushes on, “I just want to keep you and the babies safe.” Loki opens his mouth to interject, so Steve raises a hand to stop him. “And I know you can do that, but we don’t even know what to expect with this pregnancy. How it will affect you physically, or even how long it will last.”

“I should think the physical would be obvious, my stomach will swell to roughly the size of a beach ball, making my every move cumbersome and tiring,” Loki responds sarcastically.

“Exactly my point! You can’t go on missions like that.”

Loki opens his mouth to respond and then snaps it closed again, eyes narrowing as he realizes his mistake. “Fine, we can wait to make decisions on my going on missions as they come up.”

Steve grins and kisses Loki, “thank you.”

 

Two days later Steve walks out into the living room with a towel wrapped around his waist, still damp from the shower. He freezes in his tracks when he see’s Natasha sitting on the couch casually flipping through a magazine.

“Home and Garden? Doesn’t seem like Loki’s thing,” she says as she lifts the magazine higher.

“Its mine,” he says as his hand grabs for his towel to make sure it doesn’t slip. And how did you get in here anyway?”

“Huh…. It was addressed to Loki Rogers. That’s really sweet by the way. And I came in through the back window. You really should be-“. She is cut off by a very naked Loki walking into the living room.

“Steve, love-“ he stops mid sentence and addresses Natasha. “Widow. Pleasure to see you again.”

Her eyes flick up and down Loki’s body, clearly admiring the view. “Pleasure to see you too,” she smirks then turns back to look at Steve, “both of you.”

“Alright, Loki back in the room.” Steve turns and ushers the god in front of him.

“Hope to see you soon, Romanov,” Loki calls over his shoulder, causing Natasha’s lip to twitch in a smile at the no doubt, double meaning.

 

When the two men return to the living room fully dressed, they find Natasha flipping through channels on the TV. Before they have had a chance to sit she tells them, “I haven’t had much luck finding someone to take a look at those suppressors. There are only a handful of people who would be able to handle it and of those there are even less that I would consider trustworthy. There really aren’t a lot of options.”

“I understand, but we really need to figure out a way to counter act them. The uh….situation has changed somewhat, making it more urgent.”

Natasha narrows her eyes, “oh? And what is that?”

Steve hesitates before answering, “I’m not sure-“

“I’m pregnant. With twins,” Loki announces.

To her credit, there is no visible outward reaction, “certainly didn’t look pregnant from where I’m sitting.”

Loki barks out a laugh and Steve just rolls his eyes.

“You understand why this is more important than ever?”

“Yeah, okay. I’ve got someone, I just wasn’t sure how you would feel about it.”

“Can you trust them?” Steve asks.

“It doesn’t matter if I do, it only matters if you do. I’ll make the call.”

She picks up her phone and dials a number before standing and walking into the kitchen where she talks quietly. When she comes back she hands the phone over to Steve, “I’ll let you explain the situation, then you can decide for yourself.”

Steve takes the phone and holds it to his ear, “hello?”

“Rogers,” the voice greets.

Steve suppresses the sigh that wants to escape his lips before he responds, “Stark.”

 

 


	12. Chapter 12

 

 

Chapter 12

 

“You’re early,” Steve says as he holds the door open for Tony.

“I know, figured I’d spend a little time checking out the neighborhood, but there isn’t much to see, so here I am.”

Steve tries not to take offense at the slight, but he is already on edge and that makes it hard. “It’s a really nice neighborhood, quiet, family orientated.”

Tony raises an eyebrow, “no, I get the appeal, I mean what better place for a super soldier and an alien to live. Speaking of, where is he?”

“Loki’s out right now,” is all the response Steve is willing to give.

“Out huh? Which one of us is it that you don’t trust? Me or him?”

Taking a slow breath and choosing to ignore Tony’s question, Steve leads the way into the living room and gestures for the billionaire to take a seat on the chair next to the couch. “Do you want anything to drink? There’s water, coffee, juice?”

“I don’t suppose you have any scotch?”

“No, sorry,” Steve responds.

Tony waves his hand dismissively and so Steve takes a seat on the couch. He knows there is no good way to broach the subject and so he just dives into it. He pulls one of the smaller suppressors from his pocket and slides it across the coffee table, trying to be respectful of Tony’s dislike of being handed things.

“I was hoping you could take a look at this.”

The billionaire picks up the device and turns it over in his hand several times. “Looks pretty high tech. What is it?” He asks as he pulls a pair of glasses out of his pocket and puts them on.

 _Here we go_ ….”It’s a magic suppressor. Came from a hydra base. I was hoping you could figure out a way to counter act it.”

“So you’re saying you want me to engineer something to stop this from turning off Loki’s magic?” Stark responds looking over the top of his glasses at Steve.

The fact that Tony’s voice has no trace of anger or bitterness in it is encouraging and Steve knows he really doesn’t have any other options, so he pushes on.

“I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important. And you’re the only person I know that can tackle something like this.” Steve hopes appealing to Tony’s vanity will help sway the man.

“I can look it over, but I’ll need Loki to test this out on, think you can keep him controlled long enough for me to do that?”

Steve bristles at the jibe, “you can’t test it on him.”

“How do you expect me to do this then? You want me to do this to help Loki, but I can’t test it on him?”

“Its not just for Loki,” Steve says, lifting his hand, turning it palm up. He pulls on his own magic and a small flame springs to life in his hand. He wishes he had the luxury of laughing at the shocked expression on his former teammates face, but the situation is too serious for that.

“When did this happen?” Tony questions as he shifts forward in his seat, placing the device back on the table.

“On Sanctuary, with Thanos.” Steve curls his hand into a fist, allowing the flame to extinguish.

“And you didn’t think to say anything to your team mates?”

Indignation wells up in Steve’s chest, but he does his best to control it. “We weren’t a team by then Tony and being as I had just died, it wasn’t my priority to inform you!”

“So you wait, what, 2 years to say anything? You didn’t think this was important to share even the last time we talked?”

“No! It’s just…… Look, can we not do this?” Steve hates being put on the defensive, but he needs to keep sight of why he is doing this. “Things are a little more complicated now and I need your help.”

“More complicated than you having magic?”

“Yes.”

Tony waits for Steve to elaborate, but when its clear that no more answers will be forthcoming he sighs, “so more secrets then? Is that how its going to be?”

Steve runs a hand through his short hair and gets up from the couch to pace around the living room. “If you can’t do this, just say so and I’ll find someone else.”

“Of course I can do it,” Tony snaps. “And we both know there isn’t anyone else who can.”

The blonde stops pacing and sits back on the couch hopeful that if he offers the billionaire something he will agree to work on the suppressor. “Ok, um, so, on Sanctuary, when I died. I had been stabbed through the heart.”

Tony flinches and his hand raises up to rub the arc reactor in his chest.

“Loki used the gauntlet to bring me back. But to do it he had to transfer half of his life to me.”

“Which means what exactly?”

“Loki’s just over a thousand years old. He should have lived until he was 5000. But he gave half of that to me to bring me back.”

Jumping to his feet, Tony starts to walk around, “wait, wait, wait. So you’re telling me that you’re gonna live for another 2000 years?”

“And I got some of his magic,” Steve adds.

“Lets put a pin in that for now.” Tony pulls a small tablet out of his coat pocket and begins to tap on the screen. “I’ll have Jarvis set you up for some scans. Should probably see how it affected the serum.” The brunette is focused on his tablet now and Steve can see the excitement on his face.

“Tony. Focus. The magic suppressors…..”

The billionaire flips a hand towards Steve, “yeah, yeah, got it. Magic suppressors. Can you come by the tower next Tuesday?”

“Will you work on the suppressors?”

Tony stops and looks up, his expression slightly put out, “already got Jarvis started on it,” he says tapping the side of his high tech glasses. “So Tuesday?”

 


	13. Chapter 13

 

 

Chapter 13

 

Loki walks in the house and sets the grocery bags down on the table, “Steve?” he calls out.

There is no answer and so he quickly puts the food away before heading into the bedroom. He knows Steve will likely not feel well after spending the day with Stark and so he plans on a nice quiet evening for the two of them.

He stops just inside the bedroom door when he hears a sound that he doesn’t immediately recognize. “Steve is that you?”

The sound comes again and this time it is unmistakable and so Loki heads straight to the bathroom where he finds his husband on the bathroom floor, retching into the toilet. He quickly grabs a washcloth and runs it under some cool water before placing it on the back of Steve’s neck.

“How long have you been home?”

The blonde tries to raise his head, but immediately begins to heave again.

When his stomach finally settles, he is able to answer, “about an hour.”

“Why didn’t you call me? Or have Stark call me? I could have picked you up from the tower. Did you drive home?”

Steve puts his arm across the toilet seat and rests his forehead on it as he takes several steadying breaths. “Tony drove me home.”

“Here, let me help you,” Loki says as he kneels behind Steve and places his hands on either side of the blondes head. He reaches in with his magic, trying to find the cause of Steve’s distress this week. All he can sense is a slight difference in Steve’s inner ear and so he focuses on that. For a month straight Steve has been coming home from Stark Tower sick after working with him on the magic suppressor.

This time is by far the worst and Loki doesn’t know if that means they are getting closer or further away from replicating the technology. As much as he hates seeing his husband in this state, he knows it is necessary if they hope to find a way to counter act the suppressors. Steve lifts his head and reaches a hand back over his shoulder, which Loki takes in his own.

“Thank you,” the blonde says as he shifts back away from the toilet.

Loki removes the cloth from his husbands neck and runs it back under the water as Steve stands shakily on his feet. The god gently swipes the cloth across Steve’s brow and then leads him into the bedroom where he strips him down to his boxers and helps him into bed. Once Steve has settled in, Loki sits with his back against the headboard.

Without opening his eyes Steve tells him, “I think we’re getting close. I couldn’t use my magic at all today. Hopefully Tony will have it dialed in by next week and he can start working on a way to counter act it.”

“That is good love. I hate the thought of you making yourself sick every week.”

“It’s important Loki.”

The god sighs and reaches out and strokes Steve’s hair. “I know. That doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

 

It takes an additional 2 weeks of testing before Tony is confident he has fully reverse engineered the suppressor. And he has a bonus for Steve when he walks back in to his lab at the Tower.

“Great news Capscicle, I figured out what was throwing everything off,” the brunette announces as soon as he see’s Steve. He proceeds to launch into a detailed explanation involving soundwaves, conductivity, base metals and magnetism that Steve zones out on after about 75 seconds.

When Tony stops talking he looks expectantly at the blonde. “That’s…. uh…. That’s great Tony,” he answers.

Tony rolls his eyes, completely aware that Steve took in almost nothing from his explanation. “Ok, but that’s not the best part. J was able to trace back some of the metals to a small subsidiary of Hammer Industries.”

That catches Steve interest. “So you’re saying Justin Hammer is Hydra?”

Picking up a bag of trail mix, Tony pops some in his mouth and begins to chew.  Between mouthfuls he answers, “as stupid as he is, I don’t think he is that dumb. But I do think its very likely that Hydra has infiltrated Hammer Industries. Which means they have access to a lot of their tech.”

“I’ll send Natasha the file on the subsidiary so she can look it over for you.”

“Send it to me too, will ya,” Steve requests.

The corner of Tony’s mouth quirks up, “can you even use a computer?”

With an exaggerated put upon sigh Steve responds, “yes Tony. I can use a computer. I even figured out how to use the TV remote all by myself, but the microwave? That’s just too much.”

“Ha Ha smart guy. Lets get started on this test so I can move on to figuring out how to stop it.”

 

Tony is as good as his word and the information arrives via encrypted file in Steve’s email later that day. Luckily, the days testing didn’t make him sick and he only feels tired as a result. Confident that Tony has figured out the tech, he sits down with Natasha, Bucky and Loki to review the data and figure out their next move.

The company is located in California and ostensibly manufactures pacemakers, insulin pumps and other small medical devices.

“I think Bucky and I should handle this one alone,” Natasha announces.

To her surprise Steve doesn’t argue, but she can’t help but notice Loki’s frown.

Bucky notices it as well. “We need to sneak in and see if we can get a look at their facilities and hopefully get some files. If they are using it as a cover to make the suppressors, there is a strong chance we may encounter some in use.” He looks pointedly at Loki, hoping he will understand the need for he and Steve to stay behind.

Before Loki can say anything, Steve interjects, “I agree. Get it planned. I’d like you to be in California by the end of the week.”

Bucky and Natasha quickly make their exit, not wanting to be there for whatever discussion is surely to take place between Loki and Steve after they leave.

Loki waits just long enough for the door to close before saying anything. “You know I could have gone with them.”

“Yes, you could have,” Steve answers slowly.

“Then why? I thought we were to discuss my involvement on missions as they come up, not just have you make decisions for me.”

Steve stands up and heads into the kitchen where he starts to pull out items to make dinner. “I’m not going either. Its not like I excluded only you.”

The god follows him into the kitchen where he leans against the counter, “well no, but still. I think I could have been helpful. I am tired of sitting here all day feeling useless while the rest of you are working on this.”

The blonde turns to his husband and smiles, “I know. And that’s why I was thinking you and I would check out something else.”

“Oh?” Loki responds, interest peaked.

“In the file there was a billing invoice for equipment for a company in Pennsylvania that didn’t have a shipping manifest tied to it. Figured we can do a little checking on it and if nothing good comes up we could head out there and have a look around.”

Loki grins at his husband, “that sounds great.”

“Don’t get too excited. We’ll have to take some precautions just in case they have any of the suppressors.”

“I know, we’ll be careful. When do we get started?”

“How about we start checking out the company tomorrow and see what we can turn up. I’m pretty tired and was hoping to go to bed after we eat.”

Loki takes the package of meat that Steve is holding out of his hand and sets it down on the counter. “Why don’t you go relax and I’ll make dinner. Afterwards we can lay in bed and start reading another of the books mother gave us.”

 

Steve is propped up on some pillows with Loki pressed against his side, head on the blondes shoulder. Steve is reading aloud about the early stages of pregnancy. When he reaches the end of the chapter he closes the book and reaches over to set it on the side table. Loki sits up and pulls off his t-shirt and scoots down until he is laying flat on the bed and then waits for his husband to lay down as well.

“I want to show you something,” he says.

“Oh? What’s that?” Steve responds.

“I noticed something in the shower today.” Loki takes Steve’s hand and places it flat on his stomach and then glides it down over the tiny, but undeniably there bump.

 

 

 


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki and Steve check out the warehouse in Pennsylvania.

 

 

Chapter 14

 

“Well this is definitely not a warehouse.”

“Would not appear so,” Loki says, “but there’s no reason we can’t go in and have a look around. Maybe get some breakfast?” With a wave of his hand, both of their uniforms transform into regular street clothes.

Steve chuckles, “you’d think I never feed you.”

“Well, it is your fault I’m hungry all the time. Your kids are taking all my energy.” Loki grins and then strides towards the small 24 hour diner and holds open the door, “are you coming?”

With a shrug, Steve follows behind, “yeah, sure, why not.”

Despite being the middle of the night, there are several customers inside the diner when the men walk in. Loki chooses a booth at the back, near the kitchen and restrooms. Steve slides in so he can keep watch on the front door while Loki sits opposite to watch the kitchen. He feels completely comfortable keeping his back to the diner with Steve there.

A waitress comes by and takes their order, not reacting at all to the amount of food both men order. When she walks towards the kitchen, Loki shifts just enough to get a look inside the swinging door.

“So the question is, why would a subsidiary of Hammer Industries be billing a diner in Pennsylvania for medical equipment?” Loki asks, when he turns his eyes back to Steve.

“Unless the food is that bad, I don’t see a good reason for it,” the blonde jokes, causing Loki to roll his eyes.

“I think I’m going to go to the restroom,” Loki announces as he stands up.

“Alright, but be careful.” Steve knows full well that Loki plans on looking around.

“Of course love. I wouldn’t dream of getting myself in trouble.” The god gives Steve a mischievous smile, which causes a pulse of want low in the blondes belly.

“Riiiiiiiiiiiight.”

 

Loki slides back into the booth just as their food arrives. It takes the waitress 2 trips to bring everything and it fills up the entire table. Loki immediately starts eating.

Steve is curious and has to ask, “so, what did you find?”

Pausing with his fork in the air, Loki responds, “there’s a door at the back of the kitchen that leads to an office. In the office is another door that leads to a basement.” He puts the fork in his mouth and chews slowly before swallowing. “Probably worth a look.”

“Think we can get in without being seen?”

Loki gives his husband a mock look of indignation, “are you doubting my abilities?”

With a laugh, Steve replies, “I would never.”

 

Once they finish their meal and pay the bill, Steve heads to the restroom while Loki goes outside. The blonde is just zipping up his pants when Loki appears next to him. He lets his eyes linger on the front of his husbands pants just long enough to make Steve blush. With a laugh, he waves his hand and they are back in their uniforms.

“Someday, I’ll get good enough to be able to do that myself,” Steve tells him wistfully as he washes his hands.

“We can practice if you want. You can already remove clothing, its only a small step to be able to switch them out.”

Steve ducks his head and blushes again, thinking about how he has used the spell to remove Loki’s pants in the past…….

The god knows his husband well enough to be able to guess at what he is thinking about. “If I touch you long enough to teleport us into the office, will you be able to control yourself?” he teases.

“Yes, I can control myself,” Steve pouts.

Loki reaches out and takes Steve’s arm, “pity.”

 

They reappear in a small office behind the kitchen. Just as Loki said, there is a door at the back that opens on a set of stairs. Moving quickly they descend the stairs, pulling the door closed behind them. Steve creates a soft illumination that they use to search the room by.

The room is small, with only a work bench along one wall and a set of shelves beside that. There are a few scattered tools on the bench and some pieces of metal, but nothing that looks important. But in the boxes on the shelves, Steve finds small parts that he recognizes from when Tony disassembled the suppressor they have.

“Looks like they are doing some assembly here, but then what?” Steve wonders aloud.

Loki only hums in response as he continues pulling boxes off the shelves and looking inside. On the top shelf he finds an empty box with an outgoing shipping label affixed. The address is located in Florida. He shows it to Steve who commits it to memory.

“I don’t think we’re going to find anything else here,” Loki says.

“Yeah, I think you’re right. Let’s head out.”

Loki takes Steve’s arm again and opens the way to Yggdrasil. They reappear in the alley way outside, next to their car.

“Let’s go back to the hotel. We can get a little more sleep before we have to check out,” Steve says as he gets in the drivers seat.

“Hmmm….. that lovely hotel room with that big bed and you want to sleep?”

Steve starts the car and pulls away from the curb. Keeping his eyes on the road he asks, trying his best to sound innocent, “what did you have in mind?”

The god looks out the passenger window as he responds casually, “oh, you know, the usual. I figured I’d get you face down on the bed and see how long it takes for the people in the next room to call and complain about all the noise you’re making.”

The corner of Steve’s mouth turns up slightly, while he keeps his eyes steadfastly on the road ahead, “sounds intriguing, but I am kind of tired.”

Loki can’t quite keep the smirk off his face when he responds, “well, lucky for you, I plan on doing all the work.”

“Yes, lucky,” Steve agrees as he drives just a little faster.

 

Much to Steve’s relief, the room next to theirs is vacant and so there are no noise complaints, but not for lack of trying on Loki’s part. He seems to take great pleasure in coaxing every sound imaginable from his husband, but none more so than when Steve utters under his breath, “it feels so good when you fuck me like this,” as he spills on the crisp white sheets.

“Language,” Loki admonishes with a triumphant grin, just before tipping over the edge in release.


	15. Chapter 15

 

 

Chapter 15

 

Loki is sitting on the couch with a laptop on the coffee table in front of him. Steve walks in from the kitchen and leans over the couch to look at the screen.

“Find anything?”

“The address is for a medical supply chain. They sell a lot of the same items that the Hammer subsidiary company manufactures. Seems too much of a coincidence to not be related,” the god answers as he stretches his neck up so Steve can kiss his cheek. “I think Bucky and Natasha should head down to Florida and check it out.”

Steve is surprised that Loki doesn’t want them to go instead of Bucky and Natasha and says as much.

“Too risky,” Loki replies. “We have to assume that this is where the assembled suppressors are being sent. Besides, you have to meet with Stark again day after tomorrow.”

“True, but-“

With a laugh, Loki turns to look directly at his husband, “it would appear you don’t like being left out of the action any more than I do.”

The sheepish smile Steve gives is all the answer Loki needs. “I also have a meeting with the healers tomorrow on Asgard. I was hoping you would go with me.”

A frown creeps across the blondes features, “is everything all right? Are you feeling sick?”

“Merely a check up love. Nothing to fret over,” Loki is quick to reassure.

“Ok good. Are we leaving tonight or tomorrow morning?”

Loki raises an eyebrow, “I guess that depends.”

His voice is full of suggestiveness and Steve knows exactly what that means. The blonde stands up straight and heads down the hall way, calling back over his shoulder, “we’ll go in the morning.”

He pulls his shirt off over his head before he gets more than ten feet away, has his pants unfastened by the time he reaches the door to their room and is completely naked as he lays down on the bed. Loki is standing in the doorway not more than ten seconds later.

 

Frigga greets them in the observatory, pulling first Loki then Steve into a hug. “Look at you,” she beams as she takes in the sight of her youngest son.

“Mother you can’t even see anything.”

“I can tell. You’re wearing your pants looser than usual.”

Steve starts to laugh, but snaps his mouth closed immediately when Loki glares at him. The god is still a little perturbed at the fact that his pants have suddenly become uncomfortably snug in the belly, which necessitated a rushed shopping trip that morning.

Leading them to the waiting carriage, Frigga tells them, “the cooks have prepared an early lunch. We can eat and catch up before going to see the healers.”

 

“Have you decided where the birth will take place?” Frigga asks the couple. “You will need time to prepare.”

Furrowing his brow in confusion he responds, “Prepare? I assumed the birth would take place here. With the healers.”

A look of alarm briefly flickers across the Queens face, “you have not finished the books I gave you,” she concludes.

Steve looks at his husband warily, who seems equally at a loss, “not yet. We just started the last one. Why?”

“I think it would be best if you finish reading the book.”

“Why,” Steve repeats.

“Finish the book,” is the only reply he gets. “If you are done, we should probably head to the healers now.”

Steve can tell a diversion tactic when he see’s one, but he lets it go, knowing that the Queen is not likely to elaborate until she is ready. He will simply have to finish the book quickly.

All thoughts about books are soon forgotten as his attention is focused on the image of the soul forge. The two small dots from before have grown dramatically and the steady beat of his children’s hearts is easy to discern. He tentatively reaches out until his hand is within the image as though he is cradling them in his palm.

“The babies look to be in good health. Another month and we should be able to determine the sexes,” the eldest healer tells them. “How are you faring?”

“Well enough,” Loki answers from where he is laying on the table.

“Any pain?”

“No.”

“Cravings? How is your sex drive?”

“What?” Steve interjects.

Loki just laughs, “are those two questions related?”

The corner of the healers mouth slides up in a smile. “I think you’re doing fine Loki. Make sure you’re eating enough. These babies will be growing extremely fast over the next couple of months. I’ll see you again a month from now.”

Back home, Steve grabs the last of the books that came from Frigga and reclines back on the couch leaving room for Loki to curl up against him. He reads for an hour before his phone rings.

“Hey Buck,” he says in greeting.

“You’re back! How was the visit to Asgard?”

“Good, the check up went well. Loki and the babies are all doing well,” Steve answers. “How is Florida?”

“Just got checked in our room. Forgot what a pain it is to fly commercial. By the way, you’ll be interested to know my name is currently David Johnson,” Bucky chuckles.

“Funny, you don’t look like a David. How are you guys gonna play this?”

“Plan on checking around outside the building tonight, try to scope out any security. Then tomorrow Nat will go in posing as a potential buyer. Once we have the layout, we’ll make a plan to get in and look around. Looking at a few days here at least, maybe a week.”

“Just be careful.”

“Of course. Go take care of that husband of yours.”

 

Steve disconnects the call and is about to pick the book back up to continue reading when he notices that Loki has dozed off. Instead, he wraps his arm around the gods middle, allowing a hand to rest over the babies, kisses Loki’s temple, relaxes back into the couch and closes his eyes.

 

 

 

 


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a companion piece over in The First of Many. Chapter 10 Babies part 1.

 

 

Chapter 16

 

Natasha immediately altered Bucky’s plan knowing that walking in unprepared would only tip them off.  The first thing she did was call and inquire about setting up an appointment to meet with someone from the company, but was told the first available time was almost 2 weeks away. She declined the appointment and said she would call back once she had a chance to review her schedule.  She then reached out to one of her contacts to have him set up a false identity that would withstand scrutiny by the medical company. While that was being done, she set an appointment for a month out and started doing research to prepare.

Progress on the counter measures for the suppressors is slow going and the only thing keeping Steve from being really frustrated is focusing on Loki and the babies. He starts work on the nursery and spends time shopping online with Loki for furniture. They also continued to read the last and by far largest book that Frigga had given to them.

 

The bright spot in all this time comes just after dinner one night when Steve settles onto the couch with Loki laying back against him holding the book for Steve to read aloud.

“Hmmmmm,” Loki hums while shifting slightly.

“Are you ok? Do you need to move to get more comfortable?”

“No, I’m fine, just…… oh… that’s…… interesting….” Loki responds.

Steve furrows his brows as he watches Loki set the book down on the coffee table and place a hand on the side of his abdomen. “Loki?”

The god reaches out and takes Steve’s hand and places it on his stomach directly over where his was a moment before. He isn’t sure what he’s supposed to feel, until it happens. A fluttering below the skin followed by a harder movement.

“Is that….Is that the babies?” The blonde asks in awe.

“Well one of them.”

Steve lifts Loki’s shirt and splays both large hands across his husbands belly. He can feel the faint movements as the babies shift and sometimes kick. He closes his eyes, lays his forehead on Loki’s shoulder, and just feels.

Loki is content to lay like this, but starts to grow concerned when he hears Steve’s breathing start to deepen. The long exhalations against his shoulder only highlight the unexpected dampness on his shirt.

“Love?”

There is no answer and so the god tries to shift around so he can see his husband. “Steve?”

He finally gets turned enough to be able to see Steve’s tear streaked face, “oh Steve, love, what’s wrong?”

“Nothings wrong. Everything’s perfect.”

 

Bucky sits in a vacant office building listening to Natasha talk to the sales rep for Rotech Medical Supply. If he weren’t so painfully bored he would be impressed with her knowledge. She had a month to prepare for her appointment and put it to good use.

Currently she is discussing the possible purchase of some ridiculously named product. Bucky blinks hard and shakes his head, trying to bring his attention back to the conversation on his radio.

He hears her ask to see samples of their products. She also tells the rep she needs to inspect their facility to ensure that products are being handled according to her companies standards for sterility and handling.

The rep responds to her request by saying they will schedule a facility inspection at another date, once they have had a chance to have a more in depth discussion about what specific products and quantities she would be interested in purchasing.

Bucky knows that means they will have to get in the building at night to get whatever information they need. When Natasha finally emerges from the building, he is more than ready to get out of there and back to the hotel so they can examine the images she was able to capture on the tiny camera that was secured to her jacket.

 

The next day Bucky calls Steve to brief him on what they know. They decide that he and Natasha should try to get inside, but that she should also keep her inspection appointment.

“Loki and I are heading back to Asgard tomorrow. We’re hoping to be able to find out the sexes of the babies.”

“So I’ll get to know if I’m spoiling nieces or nephews!”

“Yeah,” Steve smiles, “we’ll have to set up to babysit in no time.”

 

Once again Frigga meets them in the observatory. And once again they go to the dining hall to eat lunch before seeing the healers.

“We finally got to the part in the book about choosing a birthing place. I was hoping to get your advice on that,” Steve says.

Loki gives him a stern look, “I thought we agreed to have the babies at home?”

“No, you agreed to have them at home. I would be more comfortable having them here.”

Frigga watches the exchange and interjects, “given the birthing process, it would be wise to have someone close by to assist in healing if needed. But the birth is meant to be private with only the two of you present.” She looks between them.

Steve looks utterly confused, “wait, how would that even work if there aren’t healers there?”

Frigga frowns at her son in law, “I take it you still have not actually finished the book?”

Steve looks sheepish while Loki just ducks his head. “Not yet,” the god answers.

“You do realize that you will quickly run out of time? Jotun gestation is not quite 9 months and with twins you will likely deliver up to a month early.”

“Yes the healers mentioned that,” Loki says.

“Then finish the book.  I expect you both back here within 2 weeks time, so we can discuss the details of the birth.” Frigga’s tone makes it very clear that she will not tolerate any arguments on the matter and so both men agree readily.

 

Steve is practically bouncing on his feet as he holds Loki’s hand while they wait the few minutes it takes for the healers to set up the soul forge. As always he is immediately awed by the image of his ever growing unborn children.

“They thrive,” the healer tells them after examining the images for a couple of minutes. “Your children are strong and healthy.” Steve beams with pride and squeezes Loki’s hand.  “Their development is actually a little advanced for their gestation, but given their parentage that isn’t surprising.” She looks up at the expectant couple, “it is possible that these babies could arrive even sooner than we thought.”

Furrowing his brow, Steve asks, “sooner than 8 months? Is that bad?”

The healer keeps her eyes on the image of the babies as she uses her hands to manipulate the image, “not if they continue to develop at this rate. I’d like to see you come back every 2 weeks from now one just so we can monitor things more closely.”

Steve looks down at Loki, “well, I guess that works out since we have to be back here anyway once we finish the birthing book.”

The healer jerks her head up, “you haven’t finished the book?”

“Not yet, no,” Loki replies warily.

“But we will. As soon as we are home. That will be our number 1 priority,” Steve hastens to add.

“Yes, see that it is,” the healer tells them sternly before looking back at the image of the twins.  She lifts her hand into the image, “as I was saying before, both twins are developing ahead of schedule. This one here, you can see, he is slightly bigger-“

“He?” Steve interrupts excitedly.

“Yes, he,” the healer confirms. “He is slightly bigger than his sister-“

“His sister?” This time it is Loki that interrupts. “A boy and a girl?”

“Yes, a boy and a girl.”

Immediately Steve’s mind is filled with ideas for the nursery back home, but he tries to keep his focus on what the healer is saying. He knows he must look ridiculous with a huge grin plastered on his face, but he can’t help it. Even the slight concern over finishing the birthing book is overshadowed by the thought of his son and daughter arriving in a few months time.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Progress on the suppressors and a delivery for Steve and Loki!

Chapter 17

 

 _I got the cribs and changing table. They had the ones you liked in stock. They're being delivered this afternoon. Just have them put the boxes in the nursery._  
  
_Thank you love. Will you be back in time for lunch? Should I make something?_ _-L_  
__  
_I have 1 more stop and then I'll be home. I'll bring something back for us. ___  
  
_Thai food please. -L ___  
  
Steve smiles to himself at the request. This will be the third time this week. But he is happy to indulge whatever craving his husband has.  
  
When the gods phone buzzes 45 minutes later, he opens the message to see a picture of a rocking chair. One of the glider types.  
  
_What do you think?_  
  
Loki frowns at the picture. The reviews had been good but it lacks style.  
  
_No -L_  
  
Loki disliked the rocker as soon as he saw it online but asked Steve to look at it anyway. Steve chuckles and sends another picture.  
  
The phone buzzes again and the god looks at the new picture. This one is a much more classic design. Solid wood with a simple design carved into it.  
  
The phone buzzes again.

____

_Please?_

_At least your taste in chairs has improved. Can you get it to match the color of the other pieces? -L_

_Yes. Has to be ordered though. Take about two weeks. Can I have it? Please._

Steve really wants this rocker. It reminds him of the one his mother kept in their tiny apartment when he was young.

With a smile Loki taps out his reply.

_Yes you may get it. And don’t forget lunch. Your children are getting hungry. -L_

_I'm on it. Love you._

_We love you too Steve -L_

_‘I bet he has that dopey grin on his face now’_ , Loki thinks to himself.

And in fact the blonde does as he goes to make his purchase.

Loki puts his phone down and goes back to sharpening his blades. They are without a doubt one of his prized possessions and have been since Steve gave them to him. He takes meticulous care of them, keeping them clean and sharpened at all times.

When the door bell rings 30 minutes later, he takes the blades and his kit and sets it on the kitchen table, just out of sight then uses a glamour to hide his belly. He goes to answer the door, expecting to find the delivery driver. He stops with the door partially open. 

"Steve's not here," he says warily.

“When will he be back?”

Loki has a decision to make, does he simply shut the door in Stark’s face and risk losing his help on counter acting the magic suppressors, or does he bite back his dislike of the man and play nice. And its not an easy decision to make, until he feels a slight kick on his left side where his daughter is nestled. He has the urge to rub his palm over the spot where she lay, but resists and instead sends a wave of soothing magic to both children and pulls the door open to allow Stark in the home.

“He should be back shortly. Please do come in.” He isn’t quite able to keep the snark out of his voice.

As Tony steps in the house, Loki can see the delivery truck pull up outside. _Damn._

“Please have a seat,” Loki tells Tony, as he watches the driver unload 3 large boxes from the back of the truck. The delivery man wheels the box for the changing table up to the door, where Loki waves him in, while trying to ignore Tony's raised eyebrow. The god notes that Tony is walking around the room, looking at everything.

Loki shows the delivery man down the hall to the nursery. When he comes back out, Tony is standing in the kitchen holding one of the gods blades.  
  
Reaching out he plucks the knife from Tony’s hand and carefully wipes it down before placing it back in the wooden box with its duplicate.  
  
"Do not touch those," he warns as he closes the case and puts away his kit.

“I think I saw a little blood on that one. Does Steve know you’re playing with sharp objects?”

Tony jumps when the answer comes from behind him, “considering they were a gift from Steve, I think it's safe to say he would know exactly what Loki is doing with them.”

Loki can’t help but smirk at Tony before turning a bright smile towards his husband who is setting the bags containing their lunch on the table.  
  
The delivery driver takes the first crib to the nursery while Steve addresses Tony, “why are you here?”

“Hey, its good to see you too Steve!” Tony says, voice dripping with sarcasm.

Steve takes a deep breath before responding, “sorry, I just wasn’t expecting you.”

Tony watches the driver go back out for the last box, “clearly. I wanted to let you know, I think I may have made a break through on the suppressor.”

With a sigh of relief, Steve says, “that’s great! When do you think we can test it?”

“Excuse me, can I get a signature?” The driver interrupts.

Loki reaches over and takes the offered clip board, looks over the paperwork and signs his name. Without looking up he casually says, “he’s been testing it since he got here.” He raises his head and looks directly at the billionaire, “haven’t you Stark?”

The delivery man lets himself out, in a hurry to get out of the tension in the room. And he is just in time as Steve whirls around on Tony, “you what! I told you before you can’t test on Loki! Why would you do that?”

“I was planning on testing it on you, but reindeer games was here instead.”

“Don’t call him that!”  “I do live here.” Steve and Loki answer simultaneously.

“Look, the point is, it worked, so, yeah, uh, yay me!” Tony knows he’s in big trouble based on the look Steve is giving him.

To his surprise, it is Loki that steps in on his behalf, “Steve, he’s right, it did work. This is a good thing.”

The blonde turns and pulls Loki into his arms, “I know, I just want to protect you. Are you sure you’re okay? Nothing happened?”

“Everything’s fine,” Loki soothes. “They’re fine.”

"Something you boys want to share with the class?" Tony pipes up.  
  
Steve continues to hold Loki, "No."  
  
“You sure about that? Because I'm fairly certain I just watched someone deliver 2 cribs.”


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and Loki come to an understanding. And Steve puts his foot in his mouth.

Chapter 18  
 

  
Loki can feel Steve tighten his grip just a little more around him as though the soldier is trying to protect his family. The god knows there is no point in lying and frankly he can’t wait to see Tony’s reaction, so he pulls out of Steve’s embrace and removes the glamour revealing his swollen abdomen.

“Holy shit, I take it you are not adopting then.”

Loki snorts out a laugh.

Tony just looks at the men, “so that’s what you were hiding from me? Is there anything else? Any other secrets that might be important?”

“I’m not from around here,” Loki deadpans.

Steve turns to his husband, “that isn’t helping Loki.”

The god just shrugs his shoulder, then winces and puts his hand on his stomach at a particularly strong kick from one of the twins. Tony’s mouth drops open as he watches.

“Jesus Steve! You let him go on missions and fight like this?”

" _He_ is standing right here and Steve doesn't decide to _let_ him do anything,” Loki snaps.

“And how is this even possible? You're a man. Wait. You are a man aren't you?”

With a put upon sigh, Loki responds, “yes Tony I am a man. Nothing gets by you. Also, I’m not human.”

"Right.” Tony looks to Steve. “So when can we expect these little bundles of homicidal maniac to arrive.”

Steve visibly bristles at the comment but Loki just rolls his eyes and intervenes. "In 3-4 months."  
  
"You don't know for sure?”  
  
“Super soldier”, he says pointing at Steve, “not human,” he points to himself.  
  
Shaking his head Tony says, “I don't get how this is biologically possible.”  
  
“It just is. Let's move on. To answer the rest of your lingering questions; a boy and a girl, no we don't have names yet and no we will not name one of them after you,” Loki tells him.  
  
“Awwwww.... I was already liking the thought of little Anthony Rogers.”  
  
“No!” both men answer at the same time.  
  
“Tony,” Steve says rubbing a hand across his eyes. “The suppressors?” he prompts.  
  
“Yeah back to that. I actually didn't intend to test it on Lokes-“  
  
“Don't call me that,” the god interrupts. He turns to Steve, “you either.”  


“As I was saying, I didn't intend to test it on _Loki_. I have the original magic suppressor with the new anti suppressor as well. I was expecting you to answer the door. Figured I could get a better test result this way without you skewing the results by knowing it was coming. So hey, no harm no foul right?”  
  
“No harm no..... do you know what you could have done! It was one of those suppressors that caused this situation in the first place!” Steve waves his arm towards Loki's stomach.  
  
The blonde doesn't notice the tightening around Loki's jaw or the narrowing of his eyes.  
  
“Look, I'm sorry. No matter how much I dislike the guy I wouldn't have knowingly put children in danger,” Tony half way apologizes.  
  
“Again, the _guy_ is standing right here,” Loki complains.  
  
Steve looks from Loki to Tony, “yeah and I think you should apologize to him,” he says pointing to his husband.  
  
“No need," Loki cuts him off. “ _He_ is going to excuse himself from this conversation so the two of you can discuss this _situation_.” Loki turns and walks down the hallway where he goes into the nursery and shuts the door.  
  
Steve watches Loki walk away, a look of confusion on his face. He can't help the feeling that he missed something. He turns back to Tony and gestures to the couch before sitting down on the chair.  
  
Surprisingly, the billionaire does take the offered seat. Steve looks back over his shoulder towards the hallway. "I wish you could just be happy for me."  
  
“I wish I could be too, but you know what he's done. That hasn't changed.”  
  
“Yeah I do know. I know he was raised to fear and hate his own people and he was lied to his entire life. I also know he was tortured by Thanos before being sent here. I know he was under Thanos control and was meant to bring the Chitauri to take over the earth for him and I know he broke free of his control.”  
  
Tony's expression hardens at the mention of torture as images of Afghani caves flash through his mind.  
  
“I also know the good he has done since then. How many lives he has saved even if no one else knows. And I know he makes me happy.” Steve looks back over his shoulder again. “Our life.... when I first woke up I would have never dreamt of this, but here we are. And it's right Tony. I don't need you to be happy for me, but I would like it. I don't expect you to be friends with Loki, but I would like if you could find a way to work together.”  
  
Tony has been uncharacteristically quiet the entire time Steve has been talking. The only indication that he has been listening, the occasional shift of his eyes towards the hallway.  
  
Finally he clears his throat. “You never told me any of that before and it wasn’t in Shields files.”  
  
“He doesn't like people to know, but I can't deal with this constant tension anymore. There's too much at stake.”  
  
“Right. So I'm gonna get out of your hair,” he stands up from the chair and walks towards the hallway, “but first I'm gonna go talk to crazy pants for a second.”  
  
“Tony....” Steve sighs at the billionaire’s retreating back.  
  
Tony knocks on the nursery door and then pushes it open.  
  
“Steve, I'd really rather not talk right now,” Loki says from the floor where he is currently assembling the changing table.  
  
“Not Steve,” Tony responds.  
  
“Stark, I'd really rather not talk right now,” the god repeats.  
  
“Noted. I'm going to leave the anti suppressor with you. It's range isn't far. Only a few feet, but at least it's something until I can improve on it.” He pulls the small device out of his pocket and tosses it to the god who catches it easily before slipping it into the pocket on the front of his shirt.  
  
“Look, I think we may consider calling a truce,” Tony offers.

Loki doesn't respond, just picks up the next piece of the table and begins to screw it together.  
  
“Loki you’re making me be the bigger man here and I'm extremely unhappy with this turn of events.”  
  
Putting the pieces of the table down, Loki looks up, “let me make myself perfectly clear. First of all, you will never be the bigger man between us.” There is a slight curving up at the corners of the gods mouth when he says this that almost immediately disappears. “And secondly, I still haven't forgiven you for the way you treated Steve when he quit the Avengers or that stunt with the pictures years ago. You almost cost me everything then and if you ever do anything to harm me or my family again, I will kill you. Without a second thought and without any regrets and I will smile as I take one of those lovely blades, that Steve gave me, and gut you like a fish before strangling you with your own entrails.”  
  
Tony takes in Loki's expression and he has no doubt that the god is completely sincere. “Also noted,” is all he responds before turning around and going back into the living room.  
  
He finds Steve in the kitchen heating up the now cold Thai food. Tony tells him "normally I would suggest a nice bottle of wine to accompany reheated food and an apology but hey its your life.”  
  
“Apology?”  
  
“Yeah, you know, for blurting out that the magic suppressor put you in _this_ _situation_ ”, Tony replies with air quotes in the appropriate place. "Even I know that was a bone head thing to say in front of your pregnant, crazy, alien husband.”  
  
Steve’s mouth drops open and he looks back down the hallway as Tony heads to the door and lets himself out.

  
_Damn_.  
  


 

 


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Loki finally get to the end of that baby book and Bucky has more information on the suppressors.

Chapter 19

 

Steve takes the food he was reheating and sets it aside. Running a hand through his hair, he lets out a deep breath and tries to figure out how to fix his latest screw up. He didn’t mean to upset Loki and certainly didn’t mean to imply that he is not happy about the pregnancy, far from it in fact. Starting his family with the man that he loves is a dream come true. And maybe that’s what he needs to remind Loki of.

As he approaches the nursery, he can hear the god talking to himself through the slightly open door.

“….more important to talk to Stark than to come check on me. And here I am sitting on the floor, all fat and uncomfortable trying to put this stuff together. Stupid instructions don’t even make sense.”

The blonde moves to lean against the wall just outside the room, listening to his husband grumble to himself.

“Who writes these things? I mean really. Your father wanted to put all this together, but you know what? I’m going to do it myself, just so he can’t. Leaving me sitting here alone. Maybe I should call your uncle James and have him come help me and your father can go spend time with Tony Stark, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, asshole.”

Steve rests his head back against the wall and continues to listen. He knows he shouldn’t, but he actually finds the gods complaining kind of amusing. He can hear Loki shifting pieces around in the room.

“I could have gone to Asgard and had these pieces commissioned for you. Like I did the front door………that I never picked up.”

It goes quiet in the room and Steve can only imagine what Loki is doing in there. He moves so he can see in, where he finds Loki sitting with his back against the wall, knees drawn up as far as his belly will allow, head resting on his arms.

“….. _situation_ … what’s that supposed to mean? Like this was some kind of accident. Well, you’re not an accident. So don’t think that. I may not be a good father to you, but you will be loved.”

“Of course you’ll be a good father,” Steve tells him as he pushes the door all the way open. “Why would you think otherwise? I’m the one that can’t keep from saying stupid stuff.”

The god squeezes his eyes shut, but doesn’t lift his head. “I don’t know how to be a father to them. My own….. I don’t know what I am supposed to do.”

Steve carefully steps over the pieces of the changing table until he is able to sit next to his husband and put an arm around his shoulder, pulling him in close. “You don’t have to know what to do. I know I don’t. And I never meant to make you think I didn’t want this. I do want this, these children, with you. They were not an accident. They were a surprise and that’s very different. An accident, that’s something you didn’t expect and don’t want, but our babies, they are a surprise….. something you didn’t expect, but when it happens, it brings you such joy.”

He pulls Loki just a little closer, until the god unfolds his knees and turns his body to wrap his arms around Steve’s waist. In turn, Steve wraps his arms around Loki’s shoulders and buries his nose in the gods hair. “And you bring me so much joy. Look at what you are doing for me, for us. These babies are already so loved. And you, even when I think I couldn’t possibly love you more, you’re giving me this gift, this wonderful amazing surprise and I realize that I can never possibly hope to be worthy of any of it.”

Steve pulls back slightly and uses his fingers to lift Loki’s chin to look in his eyes. “You have given me everything Loki. Your love, your life, your magic, you give me purpose and now you are giving me these amazing little lives. And I’m just…..” his voice catches as his throat constricts, “I can never be, can never do enough….”

Loki lifts one hand and grips the back of Steve’s neck, bringing their foreheads together. “You are enough, Steve Rogers, you have always been enough. You are my world.”

They sit in silence on the floor holding each other close until Loki needs to move to get more comfortable. “Why don’t I go get you a chair and reheat your food and you can read the baby book to me while I finish assembling all this?” Steve asks.

“Thank you love, but you may have to help me up off the floor,” Loki responds with a wry smile.

“It will be my pleasure.”

 

An hour later Steve is working on the second crib as Loki finally gets to the last section of the book. After 2 pages Steve drops the screwdriver he is holding, “that can’t be right. I can’t do that!”

Loki reads the page out loud again and once again Steve denies what he is hearing. He can tell Steve is upset, but Loki himself has already made up his mind about the birth, he’ll just need a little help to get Steve to agree. “I think we need to speak to mother,” Loki tells him, “right away.”

“Yeah, good idea. Read the rest and we should probably move our trip to Asgard up a couple of days and go first thing in the morning.”

 

Steve is quiet as he makes dinner, his thoughts returning again and again to what they read in the book. It is very clear to him now why Frigga was so insistent they finish it. He goes through the motion of plating up the food for them both as if in a fog. Even when he sits down at the table across from Loki he eats as if on autopilot. He is finally pulled from his stupor by the ringing of his phone.

It’s Bucky and he has news, so Steve puts the call on speaker. “We got in the medical warehouse. They definitely have the suppressors there, but it looks like they have several different versions. They are kept off the regular list of inventory and it looks like they only have 1 buyer.”

“And who is that?” Loki asks.

“The US Government. And all the invoices we found were signed for by General Thaddeus Ross.”

Steve rubs a hand over his mouth, “that’s not….. I wasn’t expecting that. Do you think he’s working with Hydra?”

“Its possible, but we also know Hydra has their hooks in everywhere and so they could have someone on his staff that’s funneling them the tech. It may not be Ross himself.”

“Ok, so where do we go from here?”

“Nat and I both think we need to try and figure out why there are different versions of the suppressors. Then find out where they plan on using them.”

Steve tells Bucky, “I agree. Any thoughts on how to check the different versions? Do you think you can get a couple out without it being noticed?”

“I honestly don’t know. There was a lot of security in there. I think they’d  notice if any turned up missing. We got a few pictures, but that’s it. We’re gonna have to work the government angle and see if we can find out what Ross was using them for.”

“Ok. Can you guys get a plan together on that? Loki and I are going to Asgard again tomorrow, I want to go over options when we get back,” Steve tells his friend.

“Yeah, of course. Talk to you when you get back.”

 

When Frigga opens the door to her sitting chamber, she finds her younger son and his husband standing there. Steve has the large book clutched against his chest while Loki carries a long box tucked under his arm. She inclines her head slightly and steps aside to allow them in.

“You must have finished the book then,” she says as she gestures to a couch for them to sit down.

Steve holds on to the book, but Loki places the box on the table in front of him.

“Now that you understand, have you chosen a location for the birth?” The Queen continues.

“The birth will take place at our home on Midgard following Jotun customs,” Loki responds.

Steve’s expression conveys his unhappiness with this decision, “I am not comfortable with this. What if something goes wrong?”

Loki turns to his husband, “Steve, it will be fine and I would much rather it be this way. It just seems right.”

“We will need to leave for Jotunheim soon so you can prepare,” the Queen tells her son in law. “Have you chosen a blade?”

Reaching forward, Loki opens the case on the table, “actually we have chosen two.”

Frigga beams as she looks over the runes carved into the gleaming metal. “Oh, Loki, these are perfect.” She turns her attention back to the blonde, “Steve, I know you are worried about the children being born at home, but Loki will be more comfortable and it will be private for the two of you, as it should be. But, if you prefer, I can be on hand, at your home, with a healer should the need arise.”

The frown on Steve’s face deepens as he looks at his husband, “And what if I mess up? What if I hurt you or the babies or worse?”

“How did you expect them to come out Steve? I hardly have the required anatomy to have them naturally.”

“I assumed a healer would be doing the cesarean, not me.”

“My body, the Jotun parts of me, were made for this. And so, you will learn, and when the time comes, you will deliver these children into the world and it will be perfect.”

Steve can tell he is not going to convince Loki to change his mind about this and so he resigns himself to the fact that he will use Loki’s own blades to cut him open and deliver their babies.

 

 

 


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is off to the Jotunheim to prepare for the birth, while Loki makes plans with Bucky and Natasha.

 

Chapter 20

 

Steve is cold. So cold his teeth chatter and his muscles ache despite the layers of clothing and furs he is wrapped in.

“Your magic, Steve. You mustn’t forget to use your magic to warm yourself,” the Queen reminds him.

He only nods, unwilling to remove the wrap from his face to facilitate any other response. He tries again to pull on his magic and thankfully it responds this time, even if only weakly. It has only been 4 days. 4 days of traveling on Jotunheim, moving towards the mountains to the north from where the bifrost deposited them. How Frigga knows where to go, Steve isn’t sure and doesn’t have the energy to ask.

When they finally stop for the night, he shrugs his pack off and winces at the loss of even the small amount of warmth it provided across his back. He moves as quickly as he can to gather up wood from the area to start a fire, knowing that his muscles will start to seize as they cool down from lack of movement. It is crucial to get a fire going immediately.

The Queen opens her own pack and begins to pull out items that can be easily heated over a fire and eaten. She keeps a close eye on her son in law as he works. She can see the exhaustion in his movements, the constant freezing temperatures sapping his strength. Despite this, he is stubborn, refusing to allow the Queen to gather wood herself, denying her offer of some of her own furs for warmth, not even allowing her to use her magic to help warm him. But more than that, even though he has not said as much, she knows he has not slept since that first night, when he woke up on 3 separate occasions, screaming in terror from dreams of the ice that once took his life. Frigga suspects this plays a large role in his refusal to accept any comfort that may allow him to sleep again.

Loki had warned her of Steve’s fears and that he may do something foolish, just like this. Tomorrow they will arrive at their destination. It is here that Steve will learn how to safely deliver her grandchildren into the world. And so tonight, she will ensure that he sleeps and that it will be blessedly dreamless.

 

“Tony got me in touch with his friend Colonel James Rhodes. He is going to see what he can find out about the governments use of the suppressors. That may take awhile though,” Natasha tells Bucky and Loki.

Loki only looks thoughtful, while the soldier responds, “we really need to try and figure out what is going on with those different suppressors, but I can’t figure out a way to get them out of the lab without someone noticing.”

All three of them are silent while they eat and think over the possible options. At least 2 of them are. Loki’s thoughts dwell on his husband, as they have almost constantly since he left with Frigga several days ago. He forces himself to turn his attention back to the issue of the suppressors and has a thought.

“If we can’t get any of them out, what if we got someone in to look at them?”

Setting her now empty plate down, Natasha considers Loki’s question. “It would have to be Stark and he’s not really good at stealth. Getting him in and out would be an issue. And if we had to do it several times, that’s too risky.”

“True,” Loki responds as an idea takes shape in his head, “but you could get me in once right? And once I’ve seen the inside, I could teleport in and out, taking Stark with me as many times as he needed. He could even ostensibly remove a couple of devices for examination in his labs for a few hours and then return them the same night.”

Bucky quirks an eyebrow at Natasha, “this could work. It may be our best option, but only if you are physically able to do it. Steve would never forgive me for letting something happen to you while you’re all big and-“

“Do not finish that sentence Barnes!” Loki tells the soldier. “What do you think?” he asks, turning to Natasha.

“At this point, I think its our only option,” she responds. “I’ll call Stark and set it up.”

 

Steve wakes in the morning and is surprised to see Frigga already up and heating breakfast over the fire. For the first time since arriving, he isn’t freezing and so he knows she is using her magic to keep them both warm. He is grateful for the respite, but feels a little embarrassed that his own magic is not strong enough to consistently do it for himself. The fact that he also slept and didn’t dream of the ice lets him know that the Queen has used her magic for more than just keeping him warm.

“Before you get upset, Steve, you should know that we will be arriving within a few hours travel and you need to be rested and ready. I want you to conserve your magic, which means you will stop being so stubborn and allow me to keep us both warm.” She gestures to their breakfast and waits until he has taken some and begun to eat before getting any for herself. Steve will need to be able to draw on all his resources when they reach their destination and it is her duty to ensure that he is able to do so.

 

Frigga had been right and they reached the base of the mountain within 2 hours and another 3 has them standing at the entrance to a large cave. It is dark inside, any light from the outside disappearing within the first few feet. Creating a small illumination, the Queen gestures for Steve to lead the way inside. The blonde estimates they are about 50 feet in when the cave turns to the right and then immediately to the left so that they can no longer see the entrance.

They walk for another 10 minutes before the cave turns to the right once again and Frigga holds her hand out to stop Steve.

“Stay behind me. Let me make the introductions,” she tells her son in law.

"Should I be ready for trouble?"

“No. Jolnir is...it has been some time since we have spoken.”

She walks around the final corner and into a room roughly 12x20 feet. There are shelves with leather bound books, a desk with chair, all very simple in design, almost crude in construction. Steve trails behind the Queen, several steps back, but at the ready in case of danger.  
  
Sitting at the table is a Jotun man, reading from one of the leather bound books. Even seated, Steve can see that he is tall and lean, with a thick main of silvery hair that is in stark contrast to the deep azure of his skin. When he hears them enter, he looks up. His features remain blank as he looks at the Queen.

“Frigga.” the man inclines his head in greeting.

The Queen responds in kind. “Jolnir, it has been too long.”

“Yes. Last I saw you, you were here seeking knowledge. Have you come for more?” he smiles warmly at her, with a slight twinkle in his eye.

Steve shifts on his feet feeling too warm wrapped in his furs inside the cave. Jolnir’s eyes flick behind Frigga, noticing Steve for the first time.

“What have you brought me? A sire for training?” Steve is sure he saw a pleased smile flit across the man's face.

“Yes I have.”

Jolnir rises and circles slowly around the soldier, looking at him appraisingly.

“Interesting. He is human…. and yet so much more.”  He stops once again in front of the blonde. “A bonded sire!” he says. And this time Steve cannot mistake the smile. “He is new to his magic.”

“Yes, he is, but he is a fast learner.”

Jolnir addresses Steve directly, “what is your name?”

“Steve, Steve Rogers.”

“Steve.... how much time before Loki is to give birth?”

Frigga covers her mouth to hide the smile on her face as she watches Steve’s eyes widen in surprise.

“Uh, we're not sure because there are twins. We were told they will likely come early. So maybe 2 months.”

“Well then, you have arrived just in time. Come with me we should eat and we will talk.”

Steve just looks at the man.

“You are hungry, are you not?”

“Yes," Steve responds. And god is he hungry. The meager meals they have been eating while traveling have not been enough to sustain his over active metabolism. Which is yet another cause for his exhaustion. Jolnir turns and walks through a door way in the back of the room, pulling aside the curtain covering it for Steve and Frigga to follow.

When the three are seated at a small dining table, each with bowls of steaming stew in front of them, Jolnir starts to talk.

“Among the Jotun it is custom for the sire to deliver the children of their bearer. I have trained sires for millennia to do just that. Kings and paupers alike all must be trained.” He looks to Frigga with a question on his face. The look on her own face is solemn as she gives a small nod, indicating for Jolnir to continue.

“Just over a thousand years ago, a sire came to me for training. He was not bonded to his bearer and it was clear he only sought the training to mollify his subjects. Near the end of his time here he approached me..... I am not proud of the choice I made..... but I am not sorry either.... I wanted to seek more knowledge. Wanted to know what it was like to be a bearer so I could better train the sires.” Jolnir once again looks to the Queen before continuing.

“He did not know I was with his child when he completed his training. It was months later and time for the birth was drawing near, that word came of the death of king Laufey’s heir during childbirth. He blamed his trainer. He blamed me. I was forced to flee and so I went into hiding, knowing that not only was my life at risk, but also that of my unborn child, a bastard heir to the Jotunheim throne. I delivered my child without the aide of a sire. By now, the Jotunheim was at war with Asgard. And so I took him, my son, and left him where I knew he would be found and would be safely away from Laufey.”

The man searches Steve’s expression, trying to determine his response to his revelations. He knows the look of shock is the best he could expect, given his story.

“I no longer train sires, Steve Rogers, but for my son’s sake, I will make an exception for you.”

 

 


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a companion piece over in The First of Many. Chapter 11 Having a Breakthrough.

Chapter 21

 

Natasha pulls into the parking garage beneath Stark tower and parks the car. Loki takes a moment to put his glamour back in place to hide his stomach and steps out of the car just after she does. Driving in, Loki gawked up at the hideous building with the billionaires name on the outside, but made no remark. Natasha pulls out a flat card from her pocket and inserts it into a key slot beside the elevator door nearest where she parked. The doors slide open and she steps in with Loki right behind her. 

"Good afternoon, Ms. Romanov. Sir has instructed me to allow you and your guest access to the penthouse conference room. He will meet you there in approximately 10 minutes."

"Thank you Jarvis," Natasha responds as she looks to Loki to gauge his reaction to the AI. The god doesn't react at all to the disembodied voice. Steve had actually told him about Starks invention some time ago and so he was anticipating it. 

The elevator opens up on a large room with hallways leading in opposite directions. Natasha takes the one to the left and leads Loki to a door that she again uses her key card to open. Inside there is a large conference table with 10 chairs around it. One wall is completely made of windows and overlooks the city below. Loki immediately moves to the expanse of glass and looks out. He stands with feet slightly apart, hands clasped behind his back, knowing he strikes an imposing figure, even if it does make his lower back ache from the added weight of the babies. 

Natasha moves to stand beside him. Her eyes scan the sky. "How are you feeling?" She asks.

"I am fine."

She glances up at him with a raised eyebrow, "are you sure? You look tired."

"Please do continue with your flattery," the god responds wryly before sighing. "I suppose I am a little tired. I miss Steve. I do not sleep well when we are apart. And the children are restless. I think they have grown accustomed to hearing his voice at night."

"Are you saying Steve talks to your belly?" Natasha asks with a twitch of her lip.

Loki turns to smile at her, "would you expect anything less from him? He is already a wonderful father to the twins." He reaches a hand up to place it on his belly, but stops, knowing it will disrupt the glamour.

Natasha notices the hesitation, but says nothing. 

“And how are you holding up?” the god asks her.

“What do you mean?”

“With this situation. Being in the middle. Acting as go between and negotiator between former team mates. I would imagine it would grow rather tiresome very quickly.”

She looks at Loki through the reflection in the glass, “I’ll admit, its not something I would choose to do, but for right now, its necessary."

“I am willing to take steps to ease some of that burden if I can. For Steve’s sake.”

“Oh?” Natasha is surprised by Loki’s statement and wonders to herself just what the god is willing to do.

“Don’t get me wrong. Anything I may do is for purely selfish reasons. When the babies come, Steve will be quite busy with them and I would hate for him to be distracted worrying about relationships with teammates, former or otherwise. So you see, if there is something I can do, I would be willing to consider it, in the interest of keeping Steve’s focus on the children,” he explains with a playful lilt in his voice.

The corner of Natasha’s mouth quirks up in a smile, “uh huh, terribly  selfish of you.”

Loki’s voice turns more serious, “he shouldn’t have to be worried about any of this. He deserves some happiness and a chance for a normal life, so much more than I could ever give him.”

Natasha turns to look at the god, “Loki, I don’t think his life is ever going to be normal, but I know he would never give any of this up. He is happy, but I’m sure it would be nice for him to come home and find out you were able to work with Tony and not kill him.”

The god meets her eyes and pitches his voice just a little higher to ensure it can be heard, “I suppose you are correct. And in the spirit of working together, I have decided that I will not throw Stark out of these very high windows, tempting though it may be.”

Out in the hallway, Tony has been listening to the conversation between the spy and the god. There is a softness to Loki’s voice when he speaks of Steve and the babies that the billionaire would not have expected and it leaves him feeling off put. Loki is not turning out to be the man Tony thought him to be.

He rounds the corner and comes into the room, “Natasha, good to see you,” he greets before turning his attention briefly to the god.

Loki doesn’t miss the lack of greeting directed at him. He does not respond to Tony, simply turns away from the window and watches the billionaire drop down into the chair at the head of the table and prop his feet up on it.

Tony pastes a smile on his face, “so where do we get started on this?”

Natasha sits in the chair to Tony’s right and Loki gratefully sits next to her, relieved to get off his feet. 

“Loki and I went in last night so he could get a look around. He’s got a good understanding of their security system and the layout of the room. Once you get in, he’ll be able to show you what you can and cannot touch to avoid setting off any alarms.”

She looks over at Loki to see if he has anything to add. He remains quiet though and so she turns her attention back to Tony. “I think for the first time you should probably just get a feel for the place, see what they have and maybe figure out what you’ll need. After that, Loki should be able to get you in and out several times without arousing any suspicion.”

“And explain to me again, why Loki is taking me in alone.”

The god’s lip twitches in amusement, “afraid I won’t honor our truce?”

“I’m just saying that sometimes accidents happen and who would know better if I didn’t come back in one piece.”

Loki huffs out a breath, “first of all, if I wanted to hurt you, I can certainly think of more creative ways of doing it than making it look like you were injured on a mission. Second, I will not go back on my word, we have a truce and I am a man of honor. And third, this is too important to let our issues interfere with our goal.” He doesn’t miss the way Tony raises his eyebrows when he says he is a man of honor, but chooses to ignore it. “And as for why it has to be only you, I am only able to carry one person with me when I teleport.”

Tony glances at Natasha then drops his feet to the ground and claps his hands together, “then lets get started.”

Loki stands and walks over to Tony, placing a hand on his arm, “this can be a little disconcerting the first time so lets try something small first, it won’t do to have you vomiting all over the place.” And with that, they disappear, only to reappear seconds later at the other side of the room.

“Whoa! Jarvis, did you get that?” Tony exclaims.

“I did sir. I will begin analysis of the data immediately.”

“Great J!” Tony turns back to Loki, “lets go.”

With a nod to Natasha, Loki takes Tony’s arm again and they are gone an instant later. When they arrive in the lab with the suppressors Tony immediately pulls a pair of gloves out of his pocket and puts them on along with a pair of yellow tinted tech glasses. “You getting all this Jarvis?”

“Recording in progress,” the AI confirms.

Before Tony can touch anything, Loki leads him around the room, pointing out the security measures. “No cameras in this room?” he asks.

Loki responds, “there are three, but I am able to cast an illusion to hide our presence. Similar to the device the Widow used for the same effect when she first came in.”

It only takes minutes for Tony to look over the entire room. “There looks to be 4 different devices here. I’ve got some preliminary scans,” he says tapping the side of his glasses, “but we should probably come back when we have more time so we can slip a couple out so I can look them over in my lab.”

“If you are ready then?” Loki says, reaching out to take Tony by the arm.

 

Two nights later, Tony is working in his lab while Loki stands off to the side watching him.

“You can sit if you want,” Tony offers, pointing to a stool at the end of the workstation.

“Thank you, but I find those cause extra strain on my back.”

Tony looks up from the device he is working on and runs his eyes over the gods form. “I keep forgetting you’ve got Capscicles progeny growing in there.” He turns back to his work, “why do you keep it hidden all the time? Aren’t you proud to be Steve’s baby mama?”

“His what?”

“Baby mama…it’s a term….slang…you know what, never mind.” Tony flaps a dismissive hand in Loki’s direction.  The god only shrugs in return.

“I use the glamour so that any who see me do not know. Even here, in your building, I cannot risk being seen. It is too dangerous so only a few trusted people actually know about the twins.”

“Awwww, I’m touched to know you trust me Lokester,” Tony says with mock sincerity.

Loki rolls his eyes at the tone and the name, “I trust you about as much as you trust me. But Steve and the widow trust you and that is enough, for now. Assuming you do not attempt to call me that ridiculous name again.”

Tony opens a drawer at his work station and pulls out a bag of trail mix.  He takes some and pops it in his mouth, chewing thoughtfully, “so what am I supposed to call you?” he asks as he holds the bag out to offer some to the god.

Moving closer, Loki reaches into the bag and takes a handful, “I suppose you could call me Prince of Asgard, or God of Mischief, or if you absolutely insist, you _can_ call me by my given name, Loki.” He smiles a bit too sharply and pops the trail mix in his mouth.

“I’ll take that under advisement Rock of Ages,” Tony grins, pleased with his own wit. “I’m going to turn this one on so why don’t you go out to the living room. Can’t have Steve kicking my ass for hurting his favorite Norse myth or his half super soldier half alien offspring. I’ll have Jarvis call you back in a few minutes when its all clear.”

Loki nods, right before he snatches the bag of trail mix from the billionaires hand and makes his way out of the lab.

 


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

 

 

Jolnir’s cave is lit by the fire and a few lanterns placed around the space. Steve uses this light to work by. He grips Loki’s blade in his hand and runs it across the flesh of the animal laid before him. Working with Frigga and the Frost Giant he has learned to use his magic to control the blood flow to ensure minimal mess. The first few times, he had to gut Jolnir’s kill outside in the cold because of the mess, but now he feels confident about doing it indoors. Once he is done, he will give the meat to Jolnir to cook for the night and to cure any excess for the future when it is too harsh to venture out.

He doesn’t particularly like the task, but he understands the reasoning. He will need to be able to control blood loss when he delivers the twins. He does however enjoy working with the animals Jolnir brings to him to heal. Usually. The exception being the large deer like creature that kicked him in the ribs and the small animal that looked like a cross between a rabbit and a cat that had bitten him, drawing blood. But even those mishaps were a chance to learn.

Steve spends most of the day working on his magic and reading texts relating to Jotun anatomy. He was honestly surprised to see such sophisticated and technical writings, but knows now that his opinions were based on unfair assumptions regarding the people of the Jotunhiem. He has hope that maybe someday he will be able to share everything he has learned with his husband.

The real silver lining is that he is learning greater control of his magic and he cannot wait to share with the god what he can do. Once Steve has completed his task, he takes what is left of the carcass, which is not much as Jolnir is loath to waste any part of the animal, and takes it outside the cave and disposes of it. He walks the distance to the cave entrance, only stopping long enough to call up his magic to shield him from the biting cold.

When he is safely back inside and Jolnir has the meat roasting over the fire, the frost giant tells Steve that it is time for him to learn the last steps for the delivery.

“You must be able to actually cut into Loki and safely remove your children. I am confident that you have the necessary skills with the blades and can adequately control blood loss and heal him as needed. However, the hardest part is actually doing this to your loved one.”

“I don’t know how I’m supposed to do it. Cutting up an animal that is already dead is one thing, but this is different. We’re talking about my family.”

“The only way to prepare for this is to practice. We will start tomorrow morning.”

 

Tony Stark stands in his lab looking over the schematics for the magic suppressors that were found in the facility in Florida. It has been a week since he gave the newly improved anti suppressor back to the god, who is sitting in an office chair a few feet away.

“Each one of these operates on a different frequency, but I don’t know what they are targeting.  I can try to use the same process as before to counter act it, but I don’t know if it will work without testing it. Problem is, I would need people to test on, but I don’t know who.”

Loki is idly swiveling the chair back and forth with his feet as he listens. He stops moving and looks up when he remembers something that may be of use. “There was a facility, Fury went in. The World Security Council had some mutants who could use magic, using them for testing. At the time we didn’t know there was more than one kind of suppressor. “

“What happened to the mutants? Maybe we can talk to them and get some information,” Tony suggests.

Shaking his head Loki responds, “they killed them. There wasn’t a lot of information on the facility and nothing at the actual site other than the bodies.”

“Okay…….” Tony thinks, tapping a pencil to his lips. 

“Might I suggest contacting Charles Xavier at the School for Gifted Youngsters?” Jarvis offers helpfully.

“Good idea J. Get the Professor on the line.”

 

The conversation is short, ending with an agreement for Loki and Tony to meet the Professor at the school the next day.

 

Steve has just finished cleaning Loki’s blades and stares down at Jolnir. “I don’t know if I can do this.”

“You can and you will,” Frigga speaks up from behind him. “Jolnir has been doing this for centuries so the risk is minimal.”

Swallowing hard, Steve nods his head without turning around. He tries to relax his grip on the knife in his hand and steady his nerves.

“Just cut along the lower abdominal wall,” the frost giant coaches and so Steve takes the blade and makes the first incision directly into Jolnir’s side, swollen to roughly the size of a pregnant belly through use of his own magic.

He is not prepared for the amount of blood that begins to pour from the wound. Dropping the knife to the table, Steve pulls on his magic to search for the artery that he must have severed. He does not notice the lack of reaction from the queen behind him. It only takes him a moment to find the artery and to coax it back together, stopping the flow of blood.

“Keep going,” Jolnir tells him from the table.

Steve draws his eyebrows together, “I can’t. I could have killed you.”

“Keep going!” the giant insists, grabbing the knife with his own hand and thrusting it towards Steve to take.

Reluctantly, Steve raises the blade with one hand while using the other to open the incision and see inside. With one swift move, he slices through what would be the amniotic sac if Jolnir were truly pregnant. He knows the next step of the process and so he steels his nerves and delicately reaches in. When the time comes for the actual birth, he will be pulling the babies out before setting to work on helping Loki close his wounds.

When he pulls his hand back, he immediately focuses on knitting skin and muscle back together.  It is easier, aided by Jolnir’s own magic.

“You did well,” Frigga praises.

Steve turns to his mother in law, “no I didn’t, I almost killed him,” he says gesturing to the bloody mess made of his clothes and the floor. His stomach is sick with the thought of making the same mistake with Loki.

Jolnir gingerly sits up on the table, “you did fine. I was never in any danger. Your cuts were true. Now you know you can react if something does go wrong.”

“Wait, so that was a test?” Steve doesn’t know whether to be relieved or angry.

“Yes, and you passed,” Frigga responds. “Go clean up. I’m sure Jolnir will want to rest overnight so he will be ready to try again tomorrow.” And in fact the frost giant has risen from the table and is slowly making his way back to his sleeping area.

“Tomorrow?” Steve asks.

“Yes, you did well, but you are not ready yet.”

Steve frowns.

“I know you are anxious to get home,” the Queen tells him. “Soon. You are almost ready.”

 

Steve steps back from the table and sets the blade aside. Brows furrowed in concentration.

“You did well Steve,” Frigga praises from beside him.

He can’t quite muster the ability to smile at the compliment as the reality of the situation has set in. In a few short weeks he will be delivering his twins. And now he realizes just how completely unprepared he is. The only experience he has with babies are the ones that were thrust into his arms for pictures back when he was selling bonds during the war.

“In two days time, you will return to Asgard. Your training is near an end. You have done well Steve Rogers,” Jolnir tells the soldier as he takes Steve’s offered hand and pulls himself up to a sitting position.

 

Pulling the car into the circular drive in front of the school, Tony looks over at Loki, “its kind of weird to see you like that, knowing underneath….” He says gesturing towards the gods seemingly flat stomach.

Loki smiles and looks down at his belly. He opens the car door and only struggles a little to get out. Outside the door of the school is a man in a complex looking mobile chair. Tony pulls two duffle bags from the trunk of the car and gestures for Loki to follow as he heads to the door.

“Mr. Stark,” the bald man greets.

“Professor Xavier.”

The professor looks to Loki expectantly who holds out his hand, which the professor takes and shakes with a welcoming smile on his face.

“Loki Rogers,” the god says with his most charming smile, ignoring the quiet snort at the mention of his last name, from Tony at his side.

As they are being led to their rooms by a young woman with a white streak in her chestnut hair, Tony leans over and whispers, “Loki Rogers?”

The god just grins in amusement.

 

 

 

 


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

 

Professor Xavier listens intently as Tony explains the situation with the suppressors and their hope to be able to work with any magic users that reside at the school.

“You want to test these devices on the students? I’m afraid I cannot agree to allowing you to experiment on them.”

Tony frowns in response, while Loki’s expression remains completely stoic. As soon as he stepped foot on the grounds, he threw up a mental shield at the probing he felt in his mind. Based on the looks the Professor keeps giving him, Loki is certain, he is the one trying to skim his thoughts.

“Professor, if I may suggest, we would like the opportunity to speak to some of the students who are able to use magic. It is possible that they may be willing to assist us. It is not our intent to experiment on anyone. We simply wish to ascertain the types of magic that are being targeted so that we can develop a means to counter act them.” The god shifts in his chair, trying to ease the pressure on his back. “I’m sure you can agree that our success would have a beneficial effect for your students. And of course, Tony would be happy to provide the anti suppressors once they have been developed.”

With a slight nod of his head, the Professor responds, “very well. I will speak to some of the older students and allow them the chance to decide for themselves. If there is nothing else, lunch will be served in the common room soon if you wish to partake.” He gestures to the door to indicate that the conversation is over for the time being.

Tony stands to exit, but before Loki can maneuver himself out of his chair, Charles stops him. “Loki, if I may have a word with you? In private?”

“Certainly,” the god replies as he settles back in the chair. Tony heads out and closes the door so the two men can talk.

“What is it you wish to know about me?” Loki asks without preamble.

“You are very powerful, but you’re not a mutant.”

“Correct,” Loki responds, not ready to volunteer information.

“What exactly are you?”

“Did you not get enough in your brief glimpse into my mind?” Loki questions.

“Very little, in fact,” Charles answers calmly, despite the sharpness of Loki’s tone.

“Good. I would advise that you do not attempt to look uninvited again. You will not like what you find.”

For a moment Charles doesn’t say anything. He can feel the power that this man possesses. If he were a mutant he would be beyond a class 5 and yet his power is held closely in check. He does not give off the feelings of instability and bare restraint that most powerful mutants have as they attempt to control their powers. Loki is trained and disciplined. That along with what Charles was able to get from his mind completely fascinate the professor and so he decides to be completely honest.

“We don’t get many visitors here at the school. Whenever we do, I make a point of finding out everything I can about our guests before they arrive. Interestingly enough, there is very little information about you available. In fact, I was only able to find a few references to someone named Loki. This person had had ties to Captain Steven Rogers. Since you are here with Tony Stark, who is a former associate of Captain Rogers, and you gave your name as Loki Rogers, I think its safe to assume you are the same person,” the Professor concludes.

Loki flashes a toothy smile. “And what else?” He asks, curious to just how much the man has figured out.

“Your children will be very powerful. Their minds are quite active. Even now, with you blocking me, I can feel them reaching out.”

The look that flashes across the gods face is brief, but unmistakable. Pride. “Yes, they are quite anxious to be born. Only a few more weeks. I’m sure you can understand my desire to deal with these suppressors quickly.”

“Although I am sure I already know the answer, may I ask, is Captain Rogers the father?”

With a grin, Loki drops his mental wards for just a moment.

To his credit, the Professor keeps his expression neutral. “I see.”

“Steve is currently preparing for the birth. I expect him back soon,” the god volunteers.

“Thank you Loki. I will speak to some of the senior students and staff and see what we can do to help you.”

 

A day later, Loki is sitting in Professor Xavier’s office with 3 other magic users; Wanda Maximoff, Betsy Braddock and Illyana Rasputin.  Loki sits back and allows Tony to explain the magic suppressors and the effect they had on the god’s magic. No mention is made of Steve or the children.

All three women agree to help and plans are made for the three mutants to travel to Stark Tower along with Dr. Hank McCoy who specializes in mutant studies. The decision is made to wait for one of the schools instructors, Jean Grey, to arrive back at the mansion in hopes that she may also be willing to help.  
  
In the two days that they wait, Tony spends hours working with Dr. McCoy. The mutant shows him his research and in exchange, Tony offers advice on upgrading the tech in their "danger room". Their working relationship is easy and productive and leaves Loki feeling at a bit of a loss on how to spend his time.  
  
He ends up splitting his time between shopping online and watching the students train. He finds their various skills and abilities intriguing in their vastness. He even sees a bit of himself in many of the mutants as he watches them strive to control their powers and struggle with a sense of self loathing bred from a society that views them as something to be feared and hated.  
  
He briefly wonders how things would have been different for himself if such a support system had been in place on Asgard. That line of thought leads the god down a path he would rather not explore and so he decides to take a walk around the grounds and into the surrounding wooded area.

The grounds are beautiful and Loki enjoys the peacefulness as he wanders aimlessly. In a small clearing, he stops to rest on a stump. He drops the glamour and rests his hand on his belly, turning his attention inward towards his son and daughter. The only thing missing is Steve.

 

The house is quiet and the only light comes from the lamp on the table to the side of the couch. Steve closes the door quietly behind himself, hoping not to wake Loki despite his excitement at seeing the god after all this time apart. He places his bag on the floor beside the couch and makes his way down the hallway towards their bedroom.

The door is slightly ajar and so he pushes it open the rest of the way. Even in the dim light, he can see the bed is empty. His first feeling is disappointment, the second is worry. He reaches into his pocket and fishes out his phone. Naturally the battery is dead, so he sits on Loki’s side of the bed and plugs it into the gods charger. Steve powers on his phone and dials. The phone rings 5 times before going to voicemail.

“Leave a message.”   _BEEP_

“Hey Loki. I, uh, just got back. Not sure where you are. Hope you and the babies are okay. Please call me as soon as you get this. I love you.”

He hangs up the phone and glances at the clock. Its almost 2am. After a short internal debate he calls Bucky. The soldier answers after the 2nd ring.

“Steve?”

“Yeah, hey, sorry for calling so late. I just got back and Loki’s not here.” He picks at the edge of the gods pillow, trying to push down his concern. He can hear murmuring on the other end of the line for a moment.

“Its fine. Loki’s been with Stark for a couple of days at the Xavier School for the Gifted? I think that’s what its called.”

“What are they doing at a school?” Steve asks as he tries to stifle a yawn, suddenly feeling his exhaustion now that he is on his own soft bed.

“They’re following a lead on the suppressors. Nat said Tony figured out there are four different ones that were probably being used on different mutants and magic users. So they went there to follow up.”

“But why would they go to a school?”

“Oh, it’s a school for mutants,” Bucky answers.

Steve can tell by his voice that he is close to falling asleep and so he decides to end the call. If Bucky isn’t worried then he will just have to be patient and wait for Loki to call him back.

Steve runs a hand down his face, feeling the scratch of the beard that grew in while he was gone. He knows he needs to sleep, but he really wasn't planning on spending the night alone. With a sigh, Steve stretches out on Loki's side of the bed. He uses his own pillow, and hugs Loki's tight to his body breathing in his scent. It takes awhile, but he finally drifts off to sleep close to 3am.

He jerks awake just after 6am and scans the still dark room.

"Loki...." he breathes as he surges up from the bed and closes the distance between them.

"Steve, love...." Loki murmurs against the blondes neck. “I got your message.”

 

 

 


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

 

Loki wakes to the sun streaming through the window, Steve’s chest pressed against his back, one of the blondes hands splayed across his belly and the babies shifting around restlessly. He places his own hand on his stomach next to Steve’s and smiles as he reaches out to the children with his magic. He is rewarded with a series of flutters punctuated by kicks. The bed shifts behind him and he feels a soft kiss on his shoulder.

“Morning,” Steve says and Loki can hear the smile in his voice.

“Good morning love.”

“Have you been awake long?”

“Since your children woke and started moving around.”

Steve chuckles and glides his hand over his husbands stomach, “you two settle down in there,” he says playfully.

Immediately Loki is kicked in the side, hard.

“Whoa, okay. Sorry for that,” the blonde apologizes.

“I do believe they missed hearing your voice and are merely excited to have you back. As am I.”

Steve hums in response, “I missed you too. And you,” he adds enunciating towards Loki’s belly.

Once again, the babies start to kick excitedly. “Ok, I think that’s enough of that,” Loki decides. “Now you have to get them to relax and maybe go back to sleep.”

Raising up on one elbow, Steve asks, “and how am I supposed to do that?”

Loki looks over his shoulder, “well, what you did before seemed to work.”

For a moment Steve just looks confused, until Loki turns back around and shifts his hips back. The blonde grins when realization dawns on him. “I can do that.”

He rolls away long enough to grab the bottle of lube from the bedside table and then presses against Loki’s back again. Hours earlier it had taken them several attempts to find a position that was comfortable for the god and they eventually found that this worked best.

Steve moves Loki’s hair and begins to trail wet sucking kisses along the gods neck and shoulders. It takes some maneuvering, but he is able to slick his fingers and start working the god open. When he pulls back he can see the newly formed marks on his husband’s pale skin. Those, along with the ones he left earlier give him a sense of possessiveness that he quite likes as he slowly glides into the gods tight heat. He moulds his body to Loki’s and begins to gently rock his hips. In response, the god starts to undulate his body. Steve takes his hand and runs it over the swell of Loki’s belly before dipping lower and griping the gods cock.

They move slowly against each other, relishing the intimacy of the position, taking their time to enjoy this moment. Loki’s hips stutter as he spills in Steve’s hand which causes the blonde to find his own release just a few seconds later. They lay this way, still joined for several minutes, neither one quite ready to move.

Eventually Steve pulls back after placing one last kiss on the gods shoulder.

“I think I’ll take a shower. You try to get a little more sleep,” he says quietly as he gets off the bed, hoping to not excite the babies again.

Loki merely nods, as he yawns. It is only now that Steve notices just how red and irritated Loki’s shoulder is under the slight bruising from love bites. “And I think I need to shave,” he adds noting that the scratchiness of his beard could not have felt good on the gods skin.

Again Loki nods sleepily and Steve smiles to himself as he heads to the bathroom.

It’s only 30 minutes later when Loki’s phone beeps with an incoming text message.

The god rolls carefully over, which gets harder to do with each passing day. He grabs the phone from the bed side table and checks the message.

_Where are you_

It’s from Tony. Loki briefly debates going back to sleep, but he knows there is work to be done.

 _Steve is back-L_   He sends

_Great. Bring him along. The girls will be at the tower in an hour._

Loki grins before responding. _We have to get dressed first-L_

_First of all EW. Not an image I need in my brain. Second hurry up_

I _can send you a picture if you like. Steve is quite something to look at.-L_   He types out as he wanders into the bath room where he finds Steve at the mirror getting ready to shave.

_No!_

But its too late. Loki has draped his arms around Steve’s neck from behind and snaps a picture of the two of them in the mirror. He sends it with a laugh. With a quick kiss to the side of Steve’s neck, Loki goes to the shower and turns on the water. He pulls a fresh towel out off the shelf and tests the water, making small adjustments until he is satisfied. Steve watches Loki in the mirror as he steps under the spray. The blonde is tempted to join him, but knows that would be counter productive and likely uncomfortable for the god in his current condition.

Steve turns his attention back to the mirror and starts to shave. When he has almost finished, he turns around and calls out to Loki, “what do you think?”

Loki wipes the water from his face and looks at his husband through the glass door.

“Absolutely not!” he laughs at the thick mustache still on Steve’s face.

“Yeah you’re right. I can’t pull this look off.”

 

Loki and Steve appear in the penthouse living room of Stark Tower approximately an hour later. Immediately Jarvis greets them.

“Good afternoon Mr. and Captain Rogers.”

Steve snorts out a laugh, “thank you Jarvis.” He turns to Loki, “I never realized just how weird that sounds. I don’t think anyone has ever called us that before.”

Loki just rolls his eyes, “is Tony in the lab?” he asks the AI.

“Sir, is currently on the roof with his guests. I believe he is showing them the view.”

“Thank you Jarvis. Please inform him that we are here and will be waiting in the lab.”

“Of course. I will power up your work station. And incidentally, I took the liberty of ordering some of that trail mix you like. You will find it in your lower right hand drawer.”

Loki grins at the look on Steve’s face, a mix of shock and confusion. He follows along when Loki takes his hand and leads him to the elevator and selects the floor for the lab.

“Since when are you and Tony such good friends?” He asks when the elevator starts moving.

“Should I be insulted that you doubt my ability to get along with him? Because I feel like I should be insulted,” Loki pouts.

“No! Its not that! Its just I know how he can be…” Steve stammers causing Loki to laugh. The blonde is saved any more embarrassment when the elevator doors open and Loki pulls him by the hand into the lab.

The god leads him directly to a workstation with a touch sensitive holographic computer screen and wireless ultra thin keyboard. He opens the drawer Jarvis indicated and pulls out a bag of trail mix with a triumphant smile. Steve grins and shakes his head as he watches Loki tear into the bag and start eating, his mannerisms reminiscent of a certain billionaire, playboy, philanthropist.

Three hours later Steve is sitting in a corner, playing a baseball game on his phone while Tony and Loki stand shoulder to shoulder in front of a screen full of data charts.

The god reaches his hand into the display and manipulates the images, “if we filter out this frequency we can start to isolate the others. I think once Jarvis has the girls range of magic catalogued, we should start testing.”

“Agreed. It’s too bad Jean wasn’t able to come in for testing too,” Tony comments without looking away from the display. He reaches up and moves some of the data around.

“It would have been beneficial to have her here, but Professor Xavier seemed to feel it was necessary to send her back out. We have enough to work with.”

Both men are silent for a few moments, the only sound coming from Steve over in the corner, completely engrossed in his game.

“So, Tony, let me ask you something,” Loki says as he turns to the billionaire. “If you didn’t want me to text you a nude picture of Steve this morning, why did you open it and look?”

The god smirks as he watches Tony’s cheeks color slightly. “Shut up and get back to work,” he tells Loki, who just laughs.

 

 

 


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

 

“You know, you don’t have to do this if it’s too much,” Loki says as he squats beside Betsy in the bathroom. He has her hair pulled back in one hand and is rubbing circles on her back with the other. “There is no shame if you need to stop.” Loki doesn’t say it, but they both are thinking about Illyana. She stopped the testing after 3 days when she passed out and blood started trickling out of her ear. Wanda so far has been largely unaffected by any of the suppressors.

She lifts her head and looks at him with watery eyes, “no, its ok, I can do it. And I think I’m ok now. Just a little tired.”

Loki hums at her, “Steve was much the same way when he underwent the testing.”

“Steve? Captain America has magic?”

“He is no longer Captain America, but yes,” Loki reminds her. “He has only had magic for a few years now, and it is something we do not often reveal.”

“Wow. So he did this too? So the first anti suppressor could be built?”

Betsy shifts back and stands. Loki stays on the ground, unhappy to admit that he is getting to the point where he will have to start asking for help getting back up. He inhales a deep breath and braces his hand on the toilet rim to push himself up. If Betsy notices, she doesn’t say anything.

Loki washes his hands and sighs at his reflection in the mirror before turning back around, “you will find out soon anyway.” He waves a hand and removes the glamour hiding the pregnancy.

Betsy grins, “I knew something was going on. How much longer? It can’t be that long, you’re-“

“Huge… yes, I know,” Loki cuts her off wryly. “Still a few more weeks to go. Twins.”

“Is it ok? Can I touch?” she asks tentatively.

In general Loki doesn’t let a lot of people touch him, besides Steve and certainly not his stomach, but he likes Betsy and so he allows it with a nod of his head.

Reaching out, she places her hand just off center to the right, directly over where his daughter lay. “Hello.” Loki can feel the child shift and push back against his abdominal wall.

“I think she likes you,” he says with a smile and Betsy answers with a smile of her own.

 

“Hey Rhodey, whats up?” Tony asks as he glances at the projected image of his friend while he continues to manipulate the most recent data from Betsy and Wanda’s testing.

“Did you see the news?”

“Noooo….. was I on there? Pretty sure I’ve been behaving fairly well lately.”

“Not this time Tony. There was an attack this afternoon during a budget meeting featuring your friend General Ross. No real injuries, but I thought you should know.”

Loki walks over with the mention of the General.

“Can’t say I’d be heartbroken if something happened to him,” Tony quips.

“Right, but he was asked to come in for questioning about misappropriated funds. I had a buddy of mine looking into those suppressors and whatever he saw triggered an inquiry.”

“Is there any video of it?” Tony asks.

“Yeah, I just sent it over.” There is a noise behind the Colonel and he turns his head to look. When he turns back to the screen he says, “I gotta go. Higher ups are calling an emergency security meeting.”

“Later Rhodey. Thanks for the info.”

Tony disconnects the video call. “J, you have that video cued up?”

“Of course sir.” Loki could swear the AI sounded insulted by the question.

The first few minutes of the meeting are uneventful, right up until the committee starts to question General Ross about a $54,000,000 expenditure that does not appear in the department budget. Ross starts to explain about a level red project. It is clear that the committee members have no idea what a level red project is and one even goes so far as to question if such a thing even exists.

Ross spends the next several minutes detailing what he calls the mutant and enhanced being threat. Loki and Tony can both tell that some members of the committee agree with him. He then tells them that this level red project was established as a way to counter act those dangerous elements.

“He’s distracting them from the fact that he took the money, by playing on their fear,” Tony comments as he taps a pencil against the palm of his hand.

“And its working,” Loki responds as he points to 2 of the 6 committee members that are nodding their heads in agreement with the general.

One member of the committee, a middle aged woman with her dark hair pulled back into a bun, tries to bring the topic back around to the missing money. “The issue here is not whether or not mutants and enhanced beings are a threat, General Ross. The issue is whether or not you used misappropriated funds to pay for a program that was not approved by the United States Army.”

“This type of unreported funding goes on all the time. These types of programs and black ops have to be paid for somehow. And don’t sit there and act like you don’t know its happening. It happens all the time, because you need it too. You need people like me to make sure these programs and operations _can_ happen, to keep America safe!”

“So General Ross, are you in fact admitting to misappropriation of United States Army funds in order to pay for an unauthorized and unreported project?”

The general shifts in his seat and opens his mouth to answer. Before he can speak, a young man in an unadorned uniform rushes down the aisle and grabs the female committee member, twisting her arm behind her back. His other hand is around her neck and glows a bright red. Instantly there are dozens of weapons pointed at him.

“Shit,” Loki curses under his breath as he watches Ross pull one of the suppressors out of his pocket and activate it, causing the young man to drop to the ground. “Call your friend Rhodey back and find out where this kid is being held. I’ll call Steve. He needs to see this.”

 

Bucky and Natasha are sitting in the living room of Steve and Loki’s Brooklyn home watching the video of the attack.

“Something doesn’t feel right about this. Its too much of a coincidence that this kid shows up just as Ross is going to admit to taking the funds,” Natasha remarks when the video is over.

Bucky nods as he adds, “And why would he go after her and not Ross. That kid didn’t do himself any favors by attacking the one person on the committee that was the most likely to bring Ross up on charges. And now he has the justification to keep building the suppressors. Its too neat. I don’t like it.”

“There’s no way it’s a coincidence. That kids name is Marcus and we pulled him out of Kiev when we raided the Hydra bases there. He was originally  from Texas, but was slated for the Winter Solider program. How he ended up inside that budget meeting, I don’t know, but I think we need to find out,” Steve says.

Loki comes in the living room with a glass of milk and a handful of cookies and sits next to his husband, “the only way we can get any answers is by getting to Marcus. He’s being held at Fort McNair in DC.“

Steve reaches over and snatches one of the cookies from Loki, “we need to get in and get Marcus out without being seen. Nat, get us a copy of the plans for that base and have Rhodey narrow down where he’s being kept. Loki, you’ll need to get back to the tower and work with Tony on getting the rest of the anti suppressors completed. We’re going to need them when we go in. Bucky, you and I will work up options for getting in and out. We need to be able to move quickly.”

 

 


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki hasn't been completely honest with Steve.

Chapter 26

 

The hotel bar is dimly lit and with only a couple of patrons, makes a good place to meet up after a mission, even if it is just reconnaissance. Tony has finished all the testing on Wanda and Betsy and is working on building the actual devices, which he doesn’t need Loki for and so they decided now was a good time to take a look around the base and surrounding area in DC. Bucky and Natasha are already sitting in a booth, both with a drink when Steve and Loki approach.

Steve is trying to decide between staying for a drink or going back to his and Loki’s room. One glance at his husband is all it takes to make him decide. “Let’s call it a night. We can get up early in the morning and start going over everything,” Steve announces.

With a smirk Bucky turns to him, “oh I know what that means. Steve’s anxious to get Loki alone in their room.”

“Well, yes. We are both very tired,” Steve responds keeping his face completely straight even though he fully understands what Bucky is trying to imply. The fact that he is correct makes it that much more difficult.

“Come now Barnes, don’t try to deny that you and the Widow will be indulging in your own post mission pleasures,” Loki teases.

To his credit, Bucky’s expression only registers surprise for just a second before he settles on a look of false indignation.

Natasha’s expression doesn’t change at all. “What gave it away?” she asks.

Steve grins, “I’ve known Bucky long enough to have seen that post sex daze after a date.”

“I do not get dazed!” Bucky insists.

Finally a flicker of a smile from Natasha, “yeah you do.”

Steve chuckles and looks at Natasha, “and don’t let him fool you either, he likes a woman to take charge, if you know what I mean.” He is rather proud of himself for only blushing a little when he says that.

“Hmmm,” Loki hums beside him, “judging from Bucky’s expression, I do believe she has already figured that out.”

“Why are we talking about my sex life?” Bucky asks, causing Steve to laugh so hard he has to hold his side.

Natasha slides out of the booth and looks at Bucky, “come on Barnes, maybe this time I’ll even let you be on top,” she says, which only starts Steve to laughing again.

 

Steve and Loki walk side by side in silence to their room. Loki works the lock and holds the door open for Steve to enter. The god follows behind and locks the door. When he turns around Steve is standing by the foot of the bed.

“The glamour, take it off.”

Loki immediately waves a hand to comply. He knows that Steve doesn’t like the glamour that Loki uses to hide his pregnant belly when they are in public, even though the blonde understands the necessity.

Once Steve see’s his husband without the glamour he is immediately at his side, running a hand across the taught skin. He can never get enough of this. “How do you feel? Are you tired?”

Loki smiles and covers Steve’s hand with his own, shifting it slightly until the blonde can feel the insistent kicks of their son. “They are restless.”

Steve knows it is hard for Loki to sleep when the twins are very active. “Come, lay down.”

He helps Loki off with his clothes and then assists him in laying on the bed. As his belly continues to grow to accommodate the twins, these simple tasks get harder and harder to accomplish on his own.

Steve sits on the edge of the bed and pulls off his boots, then begins to work on the rest of his clothes.

“I don’t think I can go with you to get Marcus out,” Loki tells him reluctantly.

Immediately Steve turns and looks the god over, running a hand down his side, as his heart beats wildly in fear. “Is something wrong? Is it the babies?”

“No, nothing is wrong. Your children are taking up too much room and sapping all my energy. I simply cannot do this with the birth so close.”

Steve knows this must have been extremely hard for the god to admit. And so he doesn’t push the issue, despite the fact that this throws off their plans for getting Marcus out. “Okay, I’ll talk to Bucky, we can look at one of the other options for getting him out.”

“You don’t have to. Charles Xavier has an associate, former associate,” he corrects, “that can shape shift. She can go in my place. Her name is Mystique. I’ll call Charles and have him get in touch with her.”

“Ok, yeah that might work. For now, I want you to rest. We’ll talk about this in the morning.”

“I’m sorry Steve, I really thought I could do it. I know you were counting on me and I let you down.” The god has curled into himself on his side, as much as his stomach will allow and Steve immediately presses his body against his husbands back.

“You didn’t let me down. I’m glad you said something. There is nothing more important to me than you and our family,” Steve tells him as he wraps his arm around the god and cradles his belly.

Loki does not respond, he is concentrating, trying to sooth the children. He was completely honest that they have been restless, but he has not told Steve that most of his energy is now going to keeping them calm. They are anxious, ready to be born, even though it is not yet time.

Steve can feel the babies shift and move under the gods skin. “They really are active tonight. Do you need me to….. um….. do you want me….. to….. help?” he asks awkwardly.

Loki squeezes his eyes shut and nods his head, “yes.” The word is spoken as a whisper and for just a moment Steve can see just how tired the god truly is.

Getting off the bed, Steve retrieves the bottle of lube from their travel bag, sets it on the nightstand and then lays back down. “I know this has to be so hard on you. And you’ve been doing this all alone, but I promise you, I’m going to do everything I can to be a good husband and father.”

“You already are more than I could ever ask for, more than I deserve. Our children are lucky to have you.”

Steve frowns and moves just a little closer to the god. “Not just me, you’re already such a great father to them. Look at what you are doing. You’re taking such good care of them already.”

With a wave of his hand Loki removes the last of his glamour, revealing the dark circles under his eyes and the gaunt look of his face. He turns his head back towards his husband just enough for Steve to get a look. “No, I am not.”

“Oh Loki,” Steve is shocked by the gods appearance. “Why didn’t you say anything? What can I do?”

Loki turns away from Steve, not wanting Steve to see him like this any longer than necessary. “There is nothing you can do. Most of my energy is spent trying to keep them calmed. It is too soon and it becomes harder everyday.”

“I’ll help you, anyway I can. Just tell me what you need.”

“I don’t know what I need.”

Steve can hear the sadness and uncertainty in the gods voice. “Then just tell me what you are feeling.”

Loki thinks for a moment, deciding how much to reveal to the blonde, but ultimately he is too tired to hold anything else back. “I feel fat and my body hurts. Human women do this all the time and yet here I am not able to handle it.”

Although Steve wants to stop the god right then, he keeps him mouth shut hoping to get a clearer picture of what Loki is going through.

“I’m tired and overly emotional and I can’t even get up off the floor without help now. The only way I can sleep is to get you to have sex with me so they settle down and I don’t know how you would even want to with me looking like this. I have no idea how to take care of babies and what if they hate me?”

Steve has to interrupt now, “First of all, you don’t have to ‘get’ me to have sex with you. I have a hard time resisting you.  I want you all the time.” He shifts his hips forward enough for the god to be able to feel his arousal. “Just the idea of being able to make love to you is enough to get me excited.  And second of all, our children could never hate you anymore than I could!”

“What if I…… what if I am unable to love them as I should?” the god cries.

“How….. why would you even think that? They’re your children. Of course you’ll love them.”

“What if….. what if they don’t look like you? What if they come out looking like me?”

“Then they would be stunning. Just like you. With black hair and green eyes-“

Loki jerks his head around to look at Steve as he gestures with his hand and brings up a glamour of his Jotun form. “No, I mean like _me_.”

Steve doesn’t even pause, “then they look like you. And they will be perfect.”

The god doesn’t respond. He just intertwines his fingers with Steve’s over his stomach.

“Tell me what you need. Let me help you,” Steve begs.

“Tell me you love me.”

“I love you,” the blonde replies readily.

“Tell me you will never leave me.”

“I will never leave you. Not even death could keep us apart. And even if I am away, I will always come back to you.”

“Promise me that if they come out Jotun, you will take them to the All Father so he can fix them.”

Steve frowns and pulls his hand back so he can raise up to look directly at the god. “Loki….. I can’t promise you that….”

 

 

                         


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27

 

Steve paces the hallway outside of Queen Frigga’s sitting room, waiting for her to finish with her current appointment. He and Loki were to travel to Asgard to meet with the healers again for a check up, but the god remained at their home in Brooklyn at Steve’s insistence.

“Steve!” The Queen greets with a smile that quickly fades when she see’s her son in law is alone. “Where’s Loki?”

“At home. I don’t think it’s a good idea for him to travel at this point,” the blonde explains.

Mouth turning down slightly, Frigga steps aside and waves Steve into her sitting room. “Is he not well?”

Steve has to think for a moment about what to tell her. He doesn’t want to alarm her unnecessarily, but he also wants to make sure she understands just how concerned he is. “Loki’s… he’s struggling. I’m not sure how to help him.”

“The time draws near. You will need to stay close by.”

And that’s just it. Steve’s heart skips. The timing. It is just so bad. He needs to be by Loki’s side, but he is also very aware of the pressing need to deal with Ross and the suppressors, preferably before the babies are born. In the end though, there is no decision to be made. Steve’s first and only priority is his family, everything else takes a back seat. And even though the suppressors represent a danger to all of them, the more immediate concern is the health of his husband and children. He will simply have to trust that Bucky and Natasha can handle Ross.

“Steve?” the Queen questions, drawing him out of his thoughts.

The blonde smiles at her, “of course, I’m not going anywhere after this. Will you come, to check on him? I would like to make sure he and the babies are physically ok.”

The Queen beams, “please prepare a room for me. I will finish up any business that I must and will stay through the birth as planned.”

Steve didn’t realize just how much tension he had been holding, until he felt it rush out of him, leaving him feeling drained. When the bifrost deposits him back in the open field he and Loki usually use when traveling to Asgard, he immediately pulls out his phone to call Natasha to explain yet another change in plans.

He has the briefest flash of guilt for calling Natasha and not Bucky, but right now he needs to hear her steady voice, seemingly devoid of judgment or emotion. He knows exactly how hard it was for Loki to back out of the mission, now that he is doing the same thing.

“And you’ve spoken to Mystique right?” he asks.

“Yes, we’re meeting up tomorrow to go over details.”

“Good. I’ll send over a couple of names of people that can take my place-“

“Steve! Stop. I’ve got this. Stop worrying. Bucky and I already had a contingency in place for this,” Natasha tells him, hoping to ease some of his concerns.

“You did?”

“Of course we did. What do you take us for? Amateurs? How do you think we got a hold of Mystique so quickly.”

“Oh,” Steve responds lamely.

This time he can hear the emotion in her voice, the smile and the fondness, “go take care of your family Steve. We’ll take care of this. And if you’re worried, I bet Stark has ultra sound equipment. I’m sure you could persuade him and Banner to take a look at those little ones for you.”

“I was kinda thinking about that too. I’ll call him now. Thank you. And tell Bucky I said hi.”

Ending the call, he gets in his car and makes the drive home, anxious to get back to Loki. As he pulls in the driveway, he calls Tony and finds out that, sure enough, he does have ultrasound equipment, including a smaller portable version, and he would be happy to make the drive out to Brooklyn that very day.

 

Steve finds Loki sitting in the large leather chair that he claims to hate so much, with his feet propped up on the ottoman. He has pillows tucked in on both his sides and his head is tilted back resting against the back of the chair. The blonde knows that he is not sleeping, merely trying to conserve energy. It helps, not having to maintain a glamour, even the small one that he used so Steve wouldn’t see how tired he is.

“How was Asgard?” the god asks without opening his eyes.

“Good. Frigga will be here in the morning. She’s going to stay until the babies are born, she’s bringing one of the healers as well, just in case.”

Loki hums his displeasure. “A healer is not needed. You already know what to do.”

Hoping to not upset his husband, Steve keeps his voice soothing and calm, “yes, I do. And I’m sure everything will be fine, but I, and your mother,” he hastily adds, “will both feel better with a healer here.”

“You worry too much Rogers,” Loki says with a flit of his hand.

Steve knows, just by the use of his surname, that Loki is irritated, but at least he seems willing to acquiesce for now.

“Tony’s going to come by later with Bruce. He has this machine, thing, that they can use to see the babies, check up on them.”

Loki opens his eyes, “they are fine. Impatient though.”

“And how are you doing?”

The god smirks, “I’ve been better. After they are born, you get to take care of them all by yourself, while I take a vacation.”

Steve chuckles and bends down to kiss the god as he walks into the kitchen to find them both something to eat. After lunch, Loki reaches his hand out so Steve can help him out of the chair. Leading him by the hand, Loki takes Steve into the bedroom. The god releases his hand and Steve immediately starts to pull off his clothes. He doesn’t miss the bottle of lube that is already sitting on the nightstand next to the bed.

 

Afterwards, Steve reclines against a pile of pillows while Loki sits between his legs and leans back against the blondes chest. Steve runs his hands over the gods stomach while he talks softly to his children. He tells them of all the places he will take them to see, of their extended family that is ready to welcome them, of teaching them magic and watching baseball games. As Loki’s breathing evens out and Steve is sure the god is dozing, he tells his children about their father and how very much he loves him. And long after his legs have gone numb and his naked skin starts to chill, he continues to hold the god, letting him sleep for as long as he can.

 

It isn’t enough, but Loki was able to sleep for 5 hours while the babies were quiet and Steve is grateful for that. Now he stands off to the side in one of the guest bedrooms, watching while Tony and Bruce set up a portable ultrasound machine. Loki sits on the edge of the bed, waiting until they are ready. He doesn’t like to lay flat on his back for long if he can help it, due to the weight of the babies pushing on his organs.

When the 2 scientists are done, Loki lays back and Steve moves to sit next to him. It takes a few minutes of staring at a fuzzy looking screen before anything recognizable becomes apparent, but when it does and he is able to see his sons face, Steve squeezes Loki’s hand and grins.

Bruce takes some measurements and looks at both children’s hearts. “Are Asgardian babies larger than human ones?” He asks.

“No, they are essentially the same,” Loki answers. He does not explain that the children are not Asgardian.

“Hmmmm….maybe it’s the serum,” Tony comments as he looks over Bruce’s shoulder at his notes.

Steve feels a sudden knot of apprehension is his stomach, “maybe whats the serum?”

Bruce is quick to reassure the father to be, “nothing bad! They’re just big. A lot of times twins can be a little smaller than a single baby would be, but these 2 are pretty big. As a matter of fact, they look full term and fully developed.”

Tony starts to put the equipment away as Bruce hands Steve a towel to wipe Loki’s stomach with. “Have you given any thought to names yet? Or have you decided to go with Anthony and Bruce? Bruce doesn’t make a very good girls name. Ok so maybe Bruce and Antonia. What do you think Loki?” Tony rambles.

“No!” Steve and Loki both answer in unison.

 

 


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here we go...

 

Chapter 28

“Frigga is here, and the healer,” Steve tells his husband when he pokes his head into the bathroom where Loki is taking a shower. He looks over Loki’s body appreciatively, “do you need any help in there?” He’s only half joking.

The blonde has always found the god’s body an incredible turn on and he will be happy to have the lean muscular body back from before, but there is something primal and intense that comes over Steve when ever he looks at Loki like this. An overwhelming urge to protect and possess all at once. Most of the time, he is able to resist and helping quiet the babies so Loki can sleep everyday, sometimes more than once a day, usually allows him to relieve his urges, but sometimes, its more than he can handle. And over the last few weeks, it has become increasingly intense as the time for the birth draws near.

“I think I can manage. I am not so feeble as to not be able to wash myself,” Loki responds with a grin as he turns towards the door where he see’s Steve palming his cock through his jeans. “Oh….. I’m not sure mother would appreciate being left waiting out there.”

“I’ll be quick,” Steve responds as he pulls his shirt over his head and unfastens his pants.

Loki rolls his eyes, “how romantic. Hurry up and get in here.”

 

When Steve emerges from the bedroom with wet hair Frigga can’t help but snicker at her son in law who ducks his head and blushes. “I take it Loki is feeling well right now?”

“Uh…..”

“Loki is feeling just fine, thanks to Steve,” the god answers for his husband with a cheeky smile, as he enters the living room and sits on the leather chair.

Frigga isn’t fooled for a moment though. She can see the dark circles and the way her sons features are sharper underneath the glamour he is using. She watches as the blonde arranges pillows around Loki and lifts his feet up on to the ottoman, fussing about until he is sure Loki is perfectly comfortable. 

“Celia, tell me what you see,” Frigga says, over her shoulder to the healer that has been standing unobtrusively by. 

She approaches and kneeling down, she raises her hand, looking to Loki for permission to touch him. The god nods his head and so she splays her palm across his stomach. She closes her eyes and moves her hand around, feeling from different angles before standing back up and addressing the Queen. “Their time is very near. I would say no more than a week, if even that.”

“A week?” Steve gasps. Suddenly feeling like he is not ready at all.

“If that,” the healer confirms. “It will be soon.”

“Thank you Celia, you may adjourn to your room until called upon,” the Queen dismisses before turning to Steve.

“Are your blades ready?”

“Yes. I mean, everything is ready, I just…..” Steve swallows and looks at Loki with wide eyes. 

“It will be fine,” the god tries to reassure his nervous husband.

 

Bucky is sitting with Steve in the blondes office/studio. They usually meet in the living room to discuss missions, but with Frigga and Celia staying, Steve felt it would be best to talk where they had more privacy.

“Natasha spoke to Stark’s friend and he said Marcus is scheduled to be transferred to a new location while they wait for his hearing. We need to move up our time table.”

“When is he being moved?”

“Day after tomorrow.”

“That doesn’t give you a lot of time. It may be better to hold off,” Steve advises his friend.

“Normally I would agree, but there’s something going on here that doesn’t make sense and this may be our only chance to get to Marcus before Ross makes him disappear. There isn't a new location listed for him, so once he’s moved off base, I don’t see him living much longer.”

Intellectually Steve knows Bucky is right, but he doesn’t like the idea of moving up the timetable, especially after both he and Loki had to drop out of the mission. “What’s your plan?”

“When they do the transfer, Mystique will go in as one of the guards. She’ll make sure it looks like he escaped on his own. With any luck, we’ll be long gone before Ross even realizes whats happened.”

“That seems like an overly optimistic simple plan,” Steve says.

Bucky nods in agreement, “it is. But I figure its less to go wrong this way.”

“I would feel better about this if I were going.”

“So would I, but once we grab him, they’re gonna know, so its best that you aren’t there. Ross already has a hard on for you and Loki.”

“Yeah and this will put a target on your back too.”

Bucky grins, “whats he gonna do to me that hasn’t already been done?”

Reluctantly Steve agrees, “I want an open com line to me the entire time.” 

“You got it. Now, I’m gonna go say hi to your mother in law….”

 

Steve is sitting in his office with his phone on speaker listening to Bucky and Natasha banter back and forth as they wait for Mystique to let them know she is safely inside. Loki is resting in their bedroom. Steve hopes he is sleeping.

In the back ground, he can hear a muffled explosion, followed by Bucky, “what the hell was that?”

Steve can hear Natasha, “Mystique isn’t responding.”

“Shit.”

“Buck, whats happening?”

“Not sure. Stand by.”

………..

The few moments before Bucky comes back on the line are excruciating. 

………..

“We’re gonna make a grab for him while the focus is on the explosion.”

“Negative. Find Mystique and get out of there,” Steve orders as he turns his head towards the door to the office, fairly sure he can hear Loki or his mother in law moving around. The noise coming from the phone line increases as Bucky and Natasha make their way into the building amongst the chaos and so Steve takes the phone off speaker and puts it to his ear.

“I said get out. That’s an order!”

Steve can feel a tightening in his chest as he listens, unable to help his friends. His heart is racing and he feels like he can’t breathe. “Buck, you need to get out of there,” he pleads.

He hears a loud noise down the hall in the direction of his bedroom, but keeps his focus on the more pressing issue. Steve jumps up from his chair as he feels his airway constrict, on the verge of a full blown panic attack. 

There is a short burst of gun fire and then silence. Steve waits, not wanting to distract his friends. His breath is coming in short bursts and his vision starts to blur.

Bucky comes back on the line, “we need an extraction. Natasha’s down.”

“I’ll get you out buck. Don’t worry.”

His first thought is Loki, but the god can’t teleport in his current condition. And his own magic is not strong enough. He has to think. Without Loki what are his options? Not Stark, too visable. Maybe Betsy or Wanda? But there isn’t time. He can’t think clearly. He needs to focus to…..A sharp pain in his chest almost brings him to his knees.

Bucky’s voice comes over the line again, “Steve! Focus! You’re panicking. Get me Frigga.”

“What?” He wasn’t aware he had been talking out loud.

“She’s our extraction. Put her on the line now!”

Steve jerks the office door open to find the Queen. She is sitting on the couch, brows furrowed, looking over Steve’s shoulder, down the hall.

“Bucky needs help!” 

Frigga’s eyes flit briefly to his face as Steve thrusts the phone into her hand. “He……,” The blonde jerks his head around to look back down the hallway where the Queens attention has been focused, “Oh god…..”

He dashes back down the hallway to his and Loki’s bedroom. Behind him he can hear Frigga, “Bucky, tell me where you are….”

Throwing open the door, he finds the god laying on the floor clutching his belly. 

“Steve…. Somethings wrong.”

And he can feel it. He can feel his daughter panic, could feel it all along, but only didn’t realize. Its his son, struggling to stay alive. He scoops Loki up in his arms and lays him on the bed before grabbing the blades from atop the dresser.

Steve needs to get the babies out now.

 

 


	29. Chapter 29

 

Chapter 29

Frigga watches her son in law retreat down the hall as she listens carefully to Bucky’s description of his location. She quickly consults the map he had left with her the day prior to make sure she knows exactly where he is. It is dangerous for a mage to teleport to a place they have never seen before, but in this situation, Frigga knows it is worth the risk and if anyone is to be successful at it, it would be her.

She appears at the base of a stairwell. Bucky is crouched down, gun drawn while Natasha leans heavily against the wall from where she sits on the floor. 

“Take her,” Bucky says as he pushes to his feet and fires off 2 rounds down the stair way. 

The Queen doesn’t question, simply bends to lift the smaller woman up, “I’ll be back,” she tells the soldier as she disappears. 

“Celia!” She calls out, laying Natasha on the couch. The healer is there in an instant checking over Natasha’s injuries. The most obvious being a bullet wound in her lower right abdomen. 

Once the Queen is sure Celia has control of the situation, she transports herself back to Bucky.

It has only been minutes, but when Frigga steps in the stairwell, she finds it empty. Calling up a cloaking spell she moves down the stairs listening for any sounds that may indicate where Bucky may have gone.

Two flights down, the railing is bent and broken. Another one and she can see a dent in the metal door leading out of the stairwell along with a smear of blood. Frigga pushes open the door an inch and looks down the hallway. There are several people rushing around at the end of the hall, but no one notices the door open or close. She makes her way down the hallway until she comes to what looks to be a command center.

“General Ross wants him transported to the Raft within the hour,” a gray haired man in a military uniform says.

“Yes sir.”

“Get him sedated and then on the helicopter.”

Frigga frowns to herself, knowing she doesn’t have a lot of time to find Bucky before he is taken off the base. She waits just long enough to see if she can get any information on where Bucky is being held, but no more is said on the matter and so she heads back out and begins to search. As she moves through the base, her thoughts keep returning to Loki and Steve.

  
Steve opens the case for the blades, then grabs the small kit they put together for the birth from the bathroom. Looking at it, suddenly it seems entirely inadequate, but there is nothing to be done about it now and so he takes it back in the bedroom and lays it next to the blades. Loki watches his husband in silence while he tries to direct as much energy as he can towards his ailing child. 

_Ok, you can do this. You trained for this_. The blonde tries to reassure himself.

To his son, he thinks, _Come on, just hold on for me ok?_

Steve goes over Jolnir’s instructions in his head. _First step….. use the spell to decrease the pain of your cut…….._

……..

………

… _.its not working. What am I doing wrong…._..

“Loki can you help me? With the spell.”

“There isn’t time. Just do it. Get them out.”

“But...” Steve starts to protest.

“Now Steve. He’s dying. Do it now.”

He knows Loki is right and so he picks up the blade. “I love you.”

Loki only nods his head.

_Feel for the muscle, find the space in between. Angle the tip down. Push in. No more than 2 inches._

Steve looks up at Loki when he pushes the blade into his side. The only reaction is a low noise in the back of his throat and a tightening around his mouth as he closes his eyes. 

_Its ok. He can take it……. Loki is strong….._

_Check your cut. Make sure you are between the muscles. Push the blade back in and draw it across the edge of the muscle. No less than 8 inches. No more than 12. Give yourself room to work._

There is a pained moan from the god as Steve glides the blade through his flesh. The blonde heaves a sigh of relief when very little blood wells up at the wound. He spares another glance at Loki, who has his brows furrowed in concentration, eyes still closed.

 _Pull the skin back with one hand and use the blade in the other to pierce the membrane surrounding the child. There will be a mess of fluids_.

And there is, but Steve is ready, Jolnir was thorough in his training.

 _Reach in….don’t be squeamish….. just do it._

“Alright, I’m gonna…..I’m gonna get him out.”

Loki jerks his head in a nod of acknowledgement, eyes focused straight ahead. Steve pushes his hand into his husbands side and he feels his child for the first time. He maneuvers his son until he can guide the head to the incision. And there he is, Steve’s first glimpse of his first born. 

_Blue_ ……

He looks worriedly up at Loki, but his eyes are now squeezed tightly shut.

“Get him out Steve,” he says through gritted teeth.

_He’s blue…._

_Carefully guide the head out and the rest of the body will come easily……_

_Shhhhh….. its ok….its ok sweet heart… your brother is fine….I’ve got him….._ Steve tries to convey reassurance to his panicking daughter.

_He’s beautiful….._

_He’s not breathing!_

_Use the blade, cut the cord…._

_Its around his neck… get it off…_

Steve discards the blade and grabs a blanket from the kit then wraps his son in it.

“Loki take him. He’s not breathing. I have to get her out.” 

He thrusts the baby into the gods arms and carefully reaches in for his little girl. He misses the way Loki refuses to open his eyes, even as he takes the child, but he can hear the whimper followed by a choked off sob that escapes the gods mouth. The lack of a babies cry is heart breaking, but Steve pushes that thought away as he feels a tiny hand.

It is only a matter of moments before he has his little girl out. He can only take a second to appreciate her delicate features before she begins to scream.

“Shhhh…..shhhhh… its ok little one,” Steve coos. As he watches, her skin starts to take on a bluish tint while thin lines, reminiscent of Loki’s own Jotun markings, begin to become visible across her face.

Steve keeps his eyes on his daughter as he grabs the second blade to cut her cord. “Loki?”

Quickly, he wraps his little girl in a blanket and even though he is afraid, he dares to look at his husband. Steve isn’t sure if he should be encouraged or disheartened by what he see’s. Loki has pulled open the blanket swaddling their son and has his forehead touching the child’s chest. Steve can see his lips moving as he works his magic on the small body.

Steve gently lays his daughter on the bed and tries to focus on the gods body and not on the tiny bundle screaming on the bed beside him or on the silent one Loki has in his arms.

“I’m gonna…..I have to get out the rest….” He glances at Loki who gives a barely perceptible nod of acknowledgement. Reaching in once again, Steve removes any last vestiges of afterbirth before pulling on his magic and working to knit Loki’s body back together. It is harder than he anticipated without the god to help him, but he keeps his focus, only sparing occasional quick glances up.

The work is painstaking and taking too much precious time, but Steve keeps at it.

“Loki?” 

Keeping his eyes on his work, he reaches out a hand to gently rub his daughters chest, hoping to offer her some comfort as she continues to cry. 

“Loki please..... What’s happening?” he can hear the near panic in his own voice and tries to control it.

Over the sound of his daughters cries, he hears Loki suck in a breath, followed by a gasp and then the sweetest thing he has ever heard in his life, as his son takes his first breath and lets out a wail. 


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30

 

Steve finishes working on Loki’s incision and takes a moment to just breathe before he scoops his daughter up in his arms. After a few moments, her crying begins to subside, turning into a series of whimpers and hiccups. He watches in fascination as the blue coloring slowly fades and the Jotun markings on her face begin to recede, drawing down her neck and under the blanket she is wrapped in. 

Chancing a look up at his husband, Steve see’s Loki staring down at the baby in his arms, brows furrowed together, with a frown on his face. 

“Whats wrong?” Steve asks cautiously.

“I can’t feel them,” the god responds quietly. “Not like I could before….it is disconcerting. They are here and I am grateful. And yet….it is as though I have lost something.” He turns his head to look at Steve, “I am sorry. It is incredibly selfish of me-“

“No. It’s not selfish. You carried them and nurtured them all these months. Or course it would be hard to have that connection suddenly taken away.” Steve shifts to sit beside Loki, angling his little girl so the god can get a look at her. “Are you okay? If I take her and clean her up? I’ll be quick and then I’ll take him so you can rest.”

“Yes, of course. I’ll be fine.” 

Steve isn’t entirely satisfied with the tone of Loki’s response, but he is hoping it can attributed to exhaustion. Standing, he takes his daughter into the nursery to grab clothes, blankets and diapers in his free hand, then goes back into the master bathroom where he runs a couple of inches of tepid water into the sink. Gingerly he places the baby in the water and begins to clean her up. This is his first chance to really look her over. She has wispy blonde hair and when she opens her eyes wide at the feeing of the wash cloth on her skin, he can see her startling green eyes, so very much like Loki’s. There is no longer any trace of the bluish tinge or Jotun markings and Steve takes a moment to ponder that before he lifts her and gently dries her off. Once he has her in a diaper and some clothes, he wraps her in a fresh blanket and takes her back out to Loki.

“She has your eyes,” he announces with a grin, as he steps back into the room.

The god looks up from where he has been staring at their sons chest, exposed where the blanket is pulled open. He gives a wan smile in response. 

“How is he doing?” Steve asks, indicating their son.

“I do not believe he will suffer any ill effects from his ordeal.”

“Good… that’s good,” Steve responds with relief. “If you wanna trade, I’ll get him cleaned up too and then you can rest. I’ll have Celia take a look at him, just to be sure.”

Loki looks from the baby his is arms, up to the bundle in his husbands arms, before his gaze settles on Steve with a glare. “You do not believe me?”

“What? No! Of course I do. I just thought….. It scared me Loki. That’s all. We could have lost him.”

The gods expression softens, “I know, but we didn’t. He is here, they are here,“ he corrects, “healthy and happy. You did well Steve.”

Smiling proudly, Steve reaches out to switch babies with the god. “We did well. Look at them Loki, they’re perfect.”

Loki doesn’t respond, only gives a strained smile.

Steve takes their little boy to get him cleaned up. When he unwraps the blanket covering him, the blonde can finally see what Loki was looking at. Like his sister, the blue has faded from his skin, but his Jotun markings did not completely recede. Across his chest and belly he bears the intricate lines of his Jotun heritage and when Steve gently turns him over, he finds more across the babies back. Like his sister, he has a fine smattering of blonde hair, but unike her, he has bright blue eyes. Steve finishes washing and dressing his son before taking him back into the bedroom. 

“I believe this little one may need to feed,” Loki informs him as he steps back in the room. 

“Ok, um, can you handle them both for a few minutes while I get them bottles?”

“I certainly hope so or else we will be in a great deal of trouble,” the god tries to joke weakly.

Taking that as a good sign, Steve lays the baby on the bed next to Loki and leans in to kiss the gods cheek, before heading out and closing the door behind himself.

The first thing he sees when he comes into the living room, on his way to the kitchen, is Natasha laid out on the couch with Celia kneeling on the ground at her side. Steve heart lurches at the sight of the blood covering the Widows discarded shirt. 

“What happened?” He asks, rushing to her side.

“We were ambushed,” Natasha tells him through gritted teeth as Celia pushes lightly on the wound in her side.

“Where’s Bucky?” He asks looking around. Then adds with alarm, “Where’s Frigga?”

“Frigga went back for him. They haven’t come back.”

Mind racing with worry, Steve start to process what he needs to do. A babies cry coming from his room, jolts him out of his thoughts and he heads into the kitchen where he pulls out a can of formula and bottles from a cupboard.

“Oh Steve….. the babies,” Natasha breathes. “Are they…..” Steve looks back at her, brows furrowed. “Are they okay?”

“Yeah, they’re good.” He turns back to making the bottles while his mind continues to work through options and scenarios for Bucky and Frigga not being back yet. He wants to go to the base and find them, but even if the babies were not just born, he knows that would be a mistake without planning and preparation. And now…. Now his first priority are his children and even though he knows Bucky and Frigga would both understand that, it still makes his chest ache. 

He takes both bottles and returns to his room, trusting Celia to take care of Natasha. Opening the door, he finds Loki sitting up against the head board with a baby laying on the bed on either side of him. He has a palm splayed across the chest of each child, rocking them ever so slightly side to side. Steve can see his eyes moving back and forth between the babies as a small smile plays at his lips. Leaning against the door frame, Steve takes a moment to just enjoy the sight of his little family.

“Are you planning on just standing there?” Loki teases without looking up.

Steve just chuckles in response, grateful that Loki’s mood, or at least his tone, has improved. Pushing off from the door he climbs on to the bed and hands Loki one of the bottles before picking up his son. They feed the children in silence for a few minutes until Loki speaks up.

“Are you going to tell me what is weighing so heavily on your mind that you are not here in this moment with me, with us?”

Steve grimaces, “its Bucky. Their mission. Natasha was shot.”

Loki jerks his head up to look at the blonde.

“She’s going to be fine,” Steve hastily adds, “Celia is with her.”

“And Bucky?”

“I don’t know. Frigga went after him, but hasn’t come back.”

Looking back down at his daughter Loki responds, “then you must go. They will need your help.”

“I can’t go! I can’t leave you now. And I wouldn’t even know where to start looking even if it was an option.”

“Is there someone else? Someone you trust to go in your stead?”

Shaking his head, Steve answers, “that’s just it. Other than you and Bucky….. “

“I could go. It will be simpler for me to travel,” Loki offers.

“No! No way. There is no way I am letting you go any where.”

Loki quirks an eyebrow up, “I do not recall you having the power to let me or not let me do anything Rogers.”

 _Shit_.

“No that’s not…. I didn’t mean it that way. God Loki, you just had twins. _I’m_ exhausted and I wasn’t even carrying them.”

They are interrupted by the ringing of Steve’s cell phone. Reaching over, the blonde answers it when he see’s Tony’s number displayed.

“What the hell Steve!” Stark shouts. “Barnes blew up an army base? I didn’t think you could be so stupid. Why would you send him in anyway?”

“He didn’t blow up the base! He and Natasha were ambushed. She was shot, but he didn’t make it out yet.” The baby in his arms starts to fuss.

“Hold on,” Steve shifts his position, tucking the phone between his ear and shoulder. 

“Was that a baby?”

“Yes Tony, it was,” Steve says tiredly.

“Wow, uh, congratulations I guess.”

“The base,” Steve tries to draw Tony back on subject. “Can you talk to Rhodey and see if he has any information on where Bucky may be?”

He can tell by the silence on the line that Stark will likely disagree. He may have cooled off towards Loki, but his hatred for Bucky Barnes is as strong as ever.

“Tony, please. Can you just ask?”

Before the billionaire can respond, there is a knock at the bedroom door and Frigga pushes it open.

“I’ll call you back.”

 

 


	31. Chapter 31

 

 

Chapter 31

“May I come in?” The Queen asks from the doorway, where she stands.

“Yes of course,” Steve tells her, expression grim, not sure if she has come with good news or bad. 

Walking over to the bed, Frigga leans in to take a look at her grandchildren as a smile spreads across her face. “How do they fare?” She asks, well aware of the distress they were in just prior to the birth. 

Loki shifts on the bed, “they are well. Would you like to meet them?”

Frigga inclines her head in an oddly formal way to Loki, “If you permit it,” but Steve can see the excitement in her eyes. 

“Steve, can you bring the rocking chair from the nursery? That way mother can hold them both.”

“Yeah, of course,” Steve answers and lays his son down next to Loki on the bed, then immediately goes to retrieve the chair. When he returns, he finds Frigga sitting next to Loki on the bed. Their heads are close together as they talk. The baby in Loki’s arms has a fist curled around Frigga’s finger while their son grips on to Loki’s fingers from where he is laying at the gods side.

Once the Queen is seated, Loki hands her his daughter, “this is Eiren,” he tells her before turning back to the bed and taking his son in his arms. “And this is Eirik.” He places the baby so he is resting on the opposite arm as his sister.

Steve marvels at the ease with which Frigga holds both twins. She takes a few moments to simply enjoy her grandchildren, but she can sense Steve getting anxious with each passing second.

“Bucky is alive. He was taken before I could get there. His captors transported him to a prison they are calling the Raft. I was able to mask my presence on one of their transports and get into the facility. It is surrounded by a great body of water. I did not see where Bucky is being held, but I did see other prisoners, maybe 10 in all.” She smiles down at Eiren who yawns sleepily. 

Steve is up pacing the room, “ok, he’s alive, that’s good. Mystique is still out there too, but she’s an unknown quantity at this point. Unless you saw her?” He adds looking at Frigga.

“It is my understanding that she is a shape shifter, so I cannot know if I saw her or not.”

“Right. I don’t think they would have moved him to the Raft if they intended to kill him right away, so we just need to get to him.”

Loki’s eyes follow his husband around the room, knowing he is trying to figure out a way to rescue Bucky and who he can send in, but Loki already knows the only option available. And even though he doesn’t like it, he knew what had to happen as soon as Frigga suggested it while Steve was out of the room. He reluctantly turns his gaze and addresses the Queen, “Mother, are you hale?” 

Her eyes flick to Steve before answering, “I am well, strong, able to help as you see fit Loki.” 

With a nod, Loki acknowledges his mothers answer, his mind made up.

Steve is still pacing around the room, the conversation between mother and son barely registering. “I can contact Sam and maybe Scott. Just have to figure out how to get them to the Raft…..after we figure out where it is….. I’ll try calling Tony back and see if-“

When he turns to pace back towards where Frigga is sitting with the twins, he notices Loki kneeling at her feet with his hand resting gently on her cheek. Her eyes are closed and his hand is glowing faintly. 

“What are you doing?” Steve asks full of concern.

Without looking away Loki answers, “get your shield. We’re going after Bucky.”

“We can’t! You just had twins Loki! And we don’t even know where he is. I’ll find another way.”

“Steve,” Loki begins as he stands, “get your shield.” He picks up his blades from the bedside table as a light travels over his body revealing the black leathers of his uniform. He flicks his wrist and changes Steve’s own clothes into his matching uniform. 

“We can’t just-“

“Yes, Steve, we can. We need to get Bucky out of there.”

“But…”

“Steve!” The Queen calls out. “Go. I have given Loki the location so he can teleport both of you safely. He has borrowed power from me, but it will not last. I will watch over Eiren and Eirik.”

The blonde furrows his eyebrows, conflict written clearly on his features. 

Loki places a hand on his husbands arm, “we need to go.”

Swallowing hard, Steve nods his head. He kneels in front of the rocking chair and kisses both babies on the head, “we’ll be back before you know it.” He looks up at Frigga, “take care of them.”

The Queen nods her assent and Steve turns to Loki who is standing with the shield in his hands, having retrieved it from the closet. “Lets go.”

 

Loki brings them to the deck of a large structure surrounded by nothing but ocean for as far as Steve can see. Moving quickly, they duck into a doorway that leads down a stairwell. "We need to move fast, it’s a good bet they already know we’re here,” Loki advises. “We should split up. I’ll head for the other prisoners while you look for Bucky. Once I get them out, I’ll find you.”

At the bottom of the stairwell there is a hallway that leads off in either direction. Loki grabs Steve by the back of the neck and pulls him in for a kiss, “I’ll come find you,” he repeats before taking the right hallway and disappearing around a corner.

Steve turns left and jogs down the hall. There is nothing for a long while and Steve is starting to wonder if this hallway leads to anything at all. Finally, he turns a corner and finds an elevator door, but there are no buttons to call it. Using his shield, he pries the doors open enough to see that the elevator is at least 50 feet below him. Immediately an alarm begins to blare. He repositions his shield on his arm, takes a breath and jumps down the elevator shaft. Two thirds of the way down, he swings his arm out and embeds the edge of the shield into the side of the shaft to stop his fall a few feet from the top of the elevator. Ignoring the jarring of his arm, he plants his feet on the wall, yanks the shield loose and drops the rest of the way, landing in a crouch. 

He can feel the elevator lurch into motion as it starts to ascend and uses the shield to bash an opening in the top. A quick look shows the elevator to be empty and he has to assume the intent is to crush him at the top of the shaft. Widening the hole, he drops down inside and hits the emergency stop. 

Opening the doors he finds only a solid wall and no way out. He climbs back out to the top of the elevator and assesses his options. He needs to get the car to descend to a floor where he can get out. He puts his shield on the harness and pulls out a small laser cutter that is kept in one of the many concealed pockets of his suit. Powering it up, he cuts through the thick cable tethering the car to the top of the shaft, causing it to plunge several feet before the emergency brakes kick out from the sides and lock into place, stopping the free fall after only a few feet. Steadying himself, he places the shield back on his arm, then rears back and smashes the emergency brake on one side of the car. On the opposite side, he braces his legs and does the same thing, causing the car to drop again at an alarming rate. Once again he uses the shield to stop his fall and hangs off the side of the shaft as the elevator impacts against the ground below him. Yanking the shield loose, he allows himself to fall again, the final 15 feet to land on the top. He climbs back in the hole and is rewarded with the site of a set of doors which he wastes no time in prying open.

Steve jerks back out of the way of incoming gun fire. He counted 5 soldiers in his brief glance in the hall. Not wanting to seriously injure or kill any of them, he does some quick figuring and then leaps in front of the opening and lets the shied fly before ducking back inside.

 

Loki has his blades drawn, both are already stained with the blood of those that tried to stop him. He moves with a single minded determination to get this mission over with and get back to his children. He knows Steve would prefer he not take lives unnecessarily, but he personally has no such qualms.

As he strides down the hallway, a group of five more soldiers rushes out at him from a side door. He throws up a shield to deflect incoming gun fire and slashes out with one of his blades at the first man he gets near. The god cuts through the soldiers with ease and continues down the hall until he comes to the door Frigga showed him. Throwing open the door to the cell block Loki finds another four guards. This facility was obviously set up to keep prisoners from escaping, not to stop someone from coming in and breaking them out. 

In 4 cells he finds the prisoners that Frigga told him about. It is only a matter of moments to disable the locks on the cell doors with a pulse of magic to the control panel. He flings open each of the cell doors, but none of the prisoners make a move to leave. In the first cell he takes a closer look at the 2 men laying on the small cots along the far wall. He reaches out and feels for a pulse on the nearest mans neck. Just as his hand makes contact, the man opens his eyes and looks blearily up at him. 

“You’ll find these prisoners will not be very cooperative as long as I have this,” comes a voice from behind him.

Loki turns and comes face to face with General Ross. In his hand is a small device that the god recognizes as one of the suppressors. With a growl, Loki pulls both of his blades and advances on the General.

“Wait!” Ross takes several steps back as a ripple of blue travels over his skin.

 

 

 


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a companion piece over in The First of Many. Chapter 13 Babies part 2.

Chapter 32

 

“ _General_ ,” Loki sneers as the ripple of blue travels over his body, voice changing to match the glamour of the nearly nude blue female body that he now wears. “Are we going to play this game?”

The General smiles, “very clever. There have only been a few that can recognize me in another form,” he says as his body shrinks and shifts before turning a deep cobalt blue to match Loki’s glamour, "and most of them are dead.”

Loki dissolves his illusion and stares at the mutant with a blank expression. “Am I supposed to feel threatened? I think you will find me hard to kill.”

Mystique glides forward and runs a hand down the side of Loki’s face, “we don’t have to be adversaries. We are so very much alike, you and I.”

The god reaches up and grabs her by the wrist, “that may be,” he concedes. “However, the fact that you abandoned Bucky and Natasha instead of sticking to the plan, does not make me very inclined to work with you in the future.”

“I do believe it was you who abandoned them first. And yet here you are.”

Loki can hear the question in her voice. “I do not have to justify myself to you Mystique. But know that I am very displeased by having to be here right now. So I suggest we get this over with before I become down right angry,” he snarls as he sends out a tendril of magic to snake around her body, effectively binding her in place. On reflex she drops the device in her hand and he takes a moment to enjoy the look of panic that flits across her features. 

“Now why don’t you tell me what your interest is in these prisoners?”

Mystique bares her teeth at the god, who just looks at her stoically as though he has all the time in the world, even though he can already feel the borrowed power from Frigga starting to wane.

He can see the moment she gives in and has to hide his smirk. “They’re mutants,” she tells him. “Ross was experimenting on them, trying to find a way to shut them down. To make them docile.”

Glancing back over his shoulder to the cells Loki responds, “it would seem he was successful.” Turning back, he stoops down and picks up the device, ignoring the twinge of pain from his incision site and the slight dizziness when he straightens. “It would appear our friend Ross has been very busy then, working on suppressors for mutants and magic users.”

He pushes the button to deactivate the device at the same time as he releases his hold on Mystique. Immediately, she rushes into the first cell to check on both men. Then she makes her way through each one, ensuring each prisoner is okay. As they emerge from their cells Loki is surprised by the variations of mutations before him, now that they are no longer suppressed. 

“I assume you have a plan to get them and yourself out of here?” Loki asks.

Mystique’s skin ripples again as she takes on the form of the General again. “Of course. It only makes sense to move them since the prison is under attack. By the way, thank you for that.”

“Pretty risky plan, hoping for a diversion like that.”

The smile that she flashes the god is not quite genuine. “It was a calculated risk. I figured if Barnes was caught, Ross would have him sent to what ever high security prison he was keeping them.” She gestures towards the other mutants who are all gathered around. “And I knew Rogers would come after him. He’s fairly predictable.”

Loki just shrugs. “I think you’d be surprised. Where is the real Ross?”

The mutant just grins and shoulders past him, with the prisoners in tow. He opts to let her go, knowing that he doesn’t have the energy or time to spare.

 

Steve has advanced down the hallway, leaving the soldiers he first encountered rendered unconscious. He comes to a door to the left that is locked but has a small window that allows him to see inside. The room is empty except for an ominous looking chair with straps to secure a person at the hands and feet. Further down the hall, he finds 2 more such rooms, all empty. From behind him, he picks up a sound coming back from the elevator shaft. With no where to hide, he turns and squares up into a defensive stance, shield raised protectively in front of his body.

He lets out a sigh of relief when he sees a familiar leather clad body drop into the elevator through the hole in the ceiling. It takes Loki a moment to straighten up from the crouch he landed in, a hand going to his side, causing Steve to frown in concern. Jogging back down the hallway, Steve steps over the prone bodies of the soldiers that attacked him.

“Are you alright?”

The gods smile is forced and the blonde can tell, despite his answer. “I am fine.”

“Okay….where are the prisoners?” Steve asks.

Loki begins to work his way down the hall way before responding, “on their way out.”

Hurrying to catch up to the god, Steve pushes, “how?”

“I ran into Mystique. Seems that was her plan all along.”

Trusting that Loki will explain later and frankly relieved to not have to worry about getting the prisoners off the Raft, he continues to follow his husband until they come to a bend in the hall. This hallway is shorter, with 4 doors along one side. The first two doors are standing open. Loki holds his hand out to indicate that Steve should stop. Drawing his blades, the god crouches down and peers around the corner. The room is empty and so they move on to the next one with the same result. The third door is closed and locked. There is a small window in this one and so they move to the end of the hall after verifying the room is empty. The last door is closed, but through the window, Steve can see Bucky strapped down to a gurney. His metal arm is held out away from his body and appears to be clamped into some type of device, effectively immobilizing the soldier. 

The blonde drops down and Loki crouches beside him. “He’s in there, but I can only see part of the room. If there’s someone in there with him and we try to come straight in the door, we’ll be easy targets.”

Steve is interrupted when the door clicks and starts to open.

“……. Yes General, Barnes is under. What about the attack? We’ve been on lockdown since the alarms started.” 

The man holding the phone listens for a moment, “Yes sir.” He finally says before ending the call and looking up into Steve Rogers’ very angry face.

“Marcus,” is the only thing Steve says before he raises his fist and punches the mutant in the face. Marcus goes flying back to crash into the far wall from the force of the blow, but he is quick to get up. He raises his hands defensively and they start to spark as he gathers energy to attack. He isn’t fast enough though and Steve rams him, leading with his shield. He steps back and looks at the man he and Loki once rescued from Kiev.

“Why?” Steve asks. “Why would you side with Ross?”

Marcus is leaning heavily on the wall, clutching at what must be at least 2 broken ribs. “Power. What other reason is there?”

Loki has moved over to check on Bucky, but he keeps one eye on Steve and Marcus. The soldier’s eyes are open but he is staring blankly up. Not seeing any means of sedation, coupled with what Marcus told Ross (who he assumes is actually Mystique still in disguise), and Loki is fairly certain Bucky’s programming has been activated. 

“I’m going to extract every secret from Barnes’ brain and when I’m done, there won’t be anything left of your friend,” Marcus sneers. “Maybe, I’ll order him to kill you first.”

With a shout of rage Steve lunges forward and smashes the shield into Marcus’ face, then chest and once again across his side. He only stops when he hears Loki behind him.

“Steve! Stop!”

The blonde glances behind him to see Loki freeing Bucky from the device securing his arm, but Steve is angry. More than angry. He is enraged at the thought that this guy has effectively turned on them, after they pulled him out of Kiev. He activated Bucky’s programming. And to be working with Ross? He knows he shouldn’t be surprised and shouldn’t take it so personal, but dammit Steve can’t help it. Especially right now, when he should be at home with his husband and their babies that are only a few hours old. And that thought angers Steve even more.

Letting his shield drop to the ground, Steve slams his body into Marcus again, pinning him against the wall. He pulls his fist back and punches him in the gut several times, then brings his elbow up and catches him across the face, breaking his nose.

Loki gets Bucky loose and looks over in time to watch Steve crack Marcus’ head back against the concrete wall before bringing a knee up into his groin. The mutant doubles over and makes a groaning sound that quickly changes into something else. Steve pauses in his assault when he realizes Marcus is actually laughing. 

“What’s so funny?” he snarls.

Still bent over, Marcus lifts his chin defiantly. “You. Such anger on behalf of your dear friend Bucky. Is it because you can’t save him? I bet you’ve tried….. to get rid of the programming….. but you can’t do it. And I bet that just makes you madder,” he taunts. 

Steve grabs him by the arm and throws him to the ground. Grabbing his shield he drops down to his knees and raises it over head.

“Steve!” Loki yells. “Don’t do this.”

From the ground Marcus smirks, “you wouldn’t do it anyways. Everyone knows Steve Rogers doesn’t kill.”

Lowering the shield and returning it to the harness across his back, Steve raises up to his feet, “you’re partially right. I don’t like to kill if I don’t have to, but that doesn’t mean I’ll stop him.” He points over to his husband who quirks an eyebrow and pulls his daggers.

Marcus’ eyes dart between the two men as Steve steps over to the table where Bucky is laying. “Be quick, I want to go home,” he tells the god without looking away from his friend. “Bucky? Hey, Bucky…” he grips Bucky’s chin and turns his face so his blank eyes are looking right at him.

The blonde ignores the scrabbling sound of Marcus trying to get away from the god. He tunes out the pleading as he watches Bucky’s eyes start to focus. His lips turn down into a frown at the wet squelching sound, but he pushes that away when Bucky blinks up at him.

“You ok Buck?”

Steve steps back as Bucky swings his legs off the gurney and sits up. The soldier looks over Steve’s shoulder to see Loki sitting on the edge of a chair with his head down, resting now that the rush of battle is over. 

“Should he be here?” Bucky asks gesturing to Loki. 

Looking back at his husband Steve questions him, “Loki, are you ok?”

“No. In fact, I am not. I have used the last of Frigga’s power so I can’t teleport out. I don’t have enough energy to climb back up the elevator shaft. And, I seem to have split open part of my incision."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At the end Steve made a choice that may seem out of character to some. But in the "to change his fate" verse it actually does.
> 
> We know Steve has a temper. It's surfaced enough times. 
> 
> We also know Steve will choose to put his family first when ever he can. 
> 
> Quiting the Avengers is a good example of both.
> 
> And while Steve doesn't kill if he doesn't feel it's necessary, he has no illusions that Loki feels the same way. 
> 
> But in the end, they both know the roll they fulfill.
> 
> There is a reason Steve holds the shield and Loki holds the daggers. 
> 
> And dammit, that asshat was keeping those boys away from their brand new babies.


	33. Chapter 33

 

Chapter 33

 

“Okay, let me see your side,” Steve requests, tugging gently at the clasps on Loki’s uniform until he is able to remove the leather top. He can already tell he is going to need more room to work and so he lifts the god and lays him on the gurney.

“Steve? What happened?” Bucky points to Loki’s stomach, now mostly flat with the absence of the babies. The incision red and angry along his side.

The blonde sets to work trying to heal, or at least close the three inch opening in Loki’s side. “They came a few hours ago,” Steve murmurs as he weaves his magic. 

Bucky’s stomach lurches as he swallows a lump in his throat, fearing the worst, “where are they?”

“At home, with Frigga.”

“And they’re…… are they….” Bucky stammers.

Sparing a glance over his shoulder, Steve smiles. “They’re good. Healthy. Beautiful.”

With an audible exhale, Bucky places a hand on his best friends shoulder, “thats good…. Great…. God Steve, you’re a dad.”

Steve turns back to Loki, trying to focus on getting the wound to close, while Bucky stands by, watching helplessly.

“Is there anything I can do?”

“Yeah, go see if you can find another way out of here.”

Bucky gives Steve’s shoulder a squeeze and walks out. He is back less than 10 minutes later, “there isn’t another way out.”

“Well that seems completely unsafe,” Steve comments wryly. 

“That’s the government for you.” Bucky replies sarcastically before gesturing to Loki who looks to be asleep on the gurney. “How’s he doing?”

“I got him closed back up. He’s supposed to sleep a lot after…… so he can heal and I think he burned through the power Frigga gave him faster than they expected he would.” Standing up, Steve paces the room, pausing only to glare down at Marcus’ body. “We’re going to have to climb out. I’ll need to rig something up so I can carry him.”

“Are you sure? That’s a long ways up carrying a body.”

“I know, but I don’t see another option right now.” Steve picks Loki up and carries him out of the room and down the hallway towards the elevator shaft. “I think I saw some rope in one of the rooms.”

Bucky hurries after him, “I already found it.” He gestures towards the end of the hallway where the soldiers Steve knocked out are now tied up.

“How about if I climb up first? I can look around and see if there is anything we can use to get him out.” He can tell just by the way the blondes shoulders tense that he is impatient. “I know you’re anxious to get out of here. Just let me take a look. A couple of minutes. That’s all I ask.”

Steve stops at the elevator shaft and turns to face his friend. “Yeah, go ahead. Just hurry.”

Without answering, Bucky enters the elevator car and hoists himself up through the roof. The grooves on either side for the emergency braking clamps are just big enough for him to use as handholds, but not quite enough for his feet and so he begins climbing, thankful for the extra strength the serum and his artificial arm give him. Even with that, it is a difficult climb and by the time the soldier is at the top, his arms are shaking.

He knows that despite how strong and how stubborn Steve is, there is no way his friend will be able to carry Loki up the shaft. Bucky just has to find another way to get him out. Pulling himself out of the shaft, the soldier turns a corner and then jogs down the empty hallway until he comes to a stairwell leading up to a doorway. Making a quick decision, he continues down the hallway and rounds the corner. He can tell right away by the state of the bodies he encounters that Loki must have been through this area. 

He smiles grimly to himself. After several years together, both Steve and Loki have changed, growing and adapting to one another, but at the core, they are still the same people they have always been. They are so good together, their differences combining and complimenting to make them a formidable pair and now with their children… Bucky shakes off the feeling that rears up. Now is not the time. Later, when he is home, nursing a beer alone in his apartment, then he will pull out this emotion and examine it closer.

He finds a storage room stocked with some tools, a first aid kit and other supplies. Looking around he tries think through his options. What he needs is something to strap Loki to so they can haul him up. He moves on until he comes to what looks like a security office. On the many monitors he can see most of the facility. In the lower levels Steve can be seen sitting on the ground next to the god, running his fingers through his black hair. A movement on one of the other monitors catches his attention. 

Outside, on the deck, there is a lone figure moving slowly, hand clutched to his side. The figure stumbles once, falling to their knees, before struggling back up and shuffling the last few feet to a panel embedded in what must be the stair well leading down into the facility. A fissure of cold runs through Bucky’s body as he watches the figure open the panel and pull down a lever. There is a loud clang that reverberates below him and repeats several times.

 

Steve jerks his head up at the sound. Three, four, five more follow and then silence. Warily he looks down the hallway before standing and gazing up the elevator shaft. Within seconds he knows he is wrong, it is not silent. Faintly he can hear something, a sound like……… water…..

He runs down the hallway and looks inside the first door only to feel his heart sink. Water, rushing in at an alarming rate. Now he understands the lack of other exits. If this measure is enacted, no one is meant to escape. He fights back the panic that threatens to claw its way into his chest. The water is already several inches deep and flooding out into the hallway. _Okay….. I can use this. Get Loki in the elevator shaft and let the water carry us up._

He spins and goes back out into the hall where he freezes in his tracks as he watches the water pour out of the elevator where it has already pooled around his husbands body.

 

 _Fuck!_ Bucky curses to himself. Going after the person on the deck is not an option. He has to get Steve and Loki out of the sub level before they drown. Running back to the storage room, he grabs an extension cord from where it hangs on a hook and runs back to the elevator shaft. When he looks down, all he can see is water. It rushes in through two large open channels set into the North and East sides, pouring down the shaft, sealing his friends down below.

 

The water gushes through the hole in the top of the elevator and Steve can hear the groaning of the metal that makes up the roof under the weight of the water that is accumulating in the shaft above, unable to drain fast enough through the hole. Steve has just enough time to grab ahold of Loki as the elevator roof gives way with a shriek of collapsing metal. 

The rush of water knocks his feet out from under him and for a moment he loses his grip on the god. When the initial onslaught is over, he finds himself standing in knee deep, freezing cold water, Loki clutched to his side protectively. Not daring to let the god go, Steve steps into the elevator, pulls his shield off his back and uses it to deflect as much water as he can and looks up. 

“Steve!” Bucky calls out as soon as he sees the glint of metal from the shield. 

The water is pulling at Steve’s legs trying to drag him back out into the hallway as it rushes past. He is forced to put the shield back on the harness in order to strengthen his hold on Loki. 

Bucky looks for something to tie the extension cord to so he can throw the end down to Steve, but all he finds is a metal bar inside the shaft itself. Luckily, it is just within reach and so Bucky ties it off and drops the end down to where Steve is now submerged to his waist. 

The cord isn’t long enough to reach Steve and he knows he’ll have to let the water carry him up. Its risky, holding on to the god, while the water continues to rush down on them in torrents, especially knowing that once he is able to reach the cord, he won’t be able to touch the ground. He pushes Loki against the wall, pulls the shield off the harness again and pins the god to the side of the elevator with a knee to his stomach and then uses all his force to embed the disc into the wall about a foot above his head. 

Pressing himself tight against the god, he is able to keep them both out of the direct flood of water pouring down. As it reaches his neck, Steve wraps one arm around Loki’s chest and grips the edge of the shield over his head with the other. He has a brief moment of near panic when he loses contact with the ground, but fights it back as he tightens the grip of both hands. 

He keeps their heads under the relative protection of the shield until the last possible second. They are closer to the water inlets now and the power of the down pour causes Steve to lose his grip on Loki. He is able to grab a fist full of hair before the gods head can sink completely below the surface and he pulls. Loki’s eyes fly open, wild and frightened.

“Steve!” he gasps, taking in a mouthful of sea water. 

“Hold on to the shield,” Steve tells him, pulling his arm within reach. Loki holds on with both hands as the water continues to rise, while Steve keeps one hand on the shield and the other around his husbands bicep. “Just hold on. Can you do that for me?”

The god nods, but doesn’t speak. The water rises until they are above the shield and can no longer hang on and so Steve shifts to stand on the surface of the disc, pinning Loki to the wall behind him again. The extra height puts the end of the cord at waist level and he grabs at it to keep from falling. He sputters and spits out mouthfuls of freezing liquid as it slams into the water next to him, buffeting his body around violently. Twice, his feet slip off the shield and the only thing that keeps them from sinking below the surface is Steve’s grip on the cord.

When the water is at his chest, he pulls the semi conscious god closer and secures the cord under his arms. “Pull him up!” He shouts to Bucky, who doesn’t hesitate and immediately starts to haul Loki up, hand over hand. The gods body swings wildly as it is pounded by the rushing water. When Bucky is finally able to haul Loki out of the shaft, the soldier is gasping for air, leaning heavily back on shaking arms.

He can see that Loki has passed out again and he forces himself to work the cord off the god, then moves forward to drop it down to Steve. 

“Steve?” Bucky calls out, eyes darting around, frantically trying to find any evidence of his friend within the elevator shaft, but there is nothing.

 

 

 


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34

 

Bucky drops the extension cord back down, then swings his legs over the edge of the shaft, getting ready to jump into the water to find his friend. Just before he lets go, he see’s a hand reach out of the water and slap against the wall trying to grab the cord. A second hand comes up and grabs on as Steve pulls himself up.

He has his shield across his back and Bucky wants to scream at him for going back for it. Steve plants his feet against the side of the shaft and begins to pull himself up using the cord. When he gets to the top, Bucky reaches out and drags him into the hallway where the blonde collapses next to his husband.

“What the hell Steve! You could have left the shield,” Bucky shouts at him, but he doesn’t continue when he notices the way his friend is shaking and trying to suck in breaths.

“Hey, slow down,” he tells him as he gently pulls the shield off the harness so Steve can lay on his back. Steve’s eyes are wide open and trained on Bucky’s face, but the shaking continues as his breathing continues to get faster. Soon he is trying to gulp down air as he raises one hand and grips Bucky’s arm hard enough to bruise.

 _Shit_. “Steve….. Stevie….. you gotta focus on me. Listen to my voice….. okay….. deep breath in….” the blonde tries to draw in a slower breath, only to have it cut off. He raises his head and shoulders off the floor, pulling himself closer to Bucky. “Stay with me Steve…. Breathe out…..” Bucky mimics what he wants his friend to do. “Now in….. slow…..thats it…..now back out……”

They repeat this three more times. Relaxing his grip on Bucky’s arm, Steve lowers his head back down to the floor. The soldier reaches up and covers Steve’s hand with his own and is barely able to suppress a shudder when he feels how cold the blonde is. He watches as Steve continues to struggle to bring his breathing under control. It starts to get better, but the shaking doesn’t stop. “We need to get moving, do you think you can walk?”

Steve’s eyes have been focused on the ceiling, but they flit briefly to Bucky. “Its okay if you can’t, but I can’t carry both of you at the same time.”

The blonde’s eyes widen and snap back to Bucky, before he tries to twist around and look for Loki. “He’s fine. Calm down, he’s fine. Right here,” he gestures to where the god is laying to their left. Steve squeezes his eyes closed and nods his head. “Okay…. Good…..I’m gonna get Loki.”

Bucky squats down next to the god and lifts him up in a firemans carry across his shoulders. “Alright, you ready?” He waits until Steve opens his eyes and focuses on him. “We need to go.”

Steve rolls to his side and pushes up to his feet, grabbing his shield on the way. He follows behind Bucky as the soldier heads towards the stair well leading up to the deck. When they get outside, Bucky sets Loki down so he is leaning against the side of the stairwell and goes to look at their options for getting off the raft.

There is a helicopter that he can fly, but he knows finding a safe place to land will be problematic. Arriving at an airport in a stolen government aircraft would not be a wise choice.

After a moments thought and a glance back at Steve, who is huddled close to Loki, he makes up his mind. Steve trails behind him as Bucky carries Loki to the helicopter and buckles him into one of the seats. He makes sure Steve is securely in and then walks back around the side of the stair well.

There he finds a man laying on his side, slowly bleeding out. He doesn’t even pause as he stoops down, takes hold of the mans collar and drags him to the edge of the deck where throws the man over the edge. Bucky watches the man’s brief struggle before he sinks beneath the water then he walks back to the helicopter, not feeling an ounce of remorse.

Once they are in the air, Bucky addresses Steve. “You okay back there,” he asks over his shoulder. When there is no immediate response he tries again. “Steve?”

“Yeah….I’m fine….”

“You sure?”

“Yeah……”

Bucky is almost sure Steve is going to say something more, but he remains silent. After about ten minutes, he is startled when Steve does speak. “It was the water. It felt like it did before, when I….. uh…” he clears his throat before trying again. “When I went in…… and…. Uh…. Died.”

Nodding his head, Bucky responds, “I get it. You can’t come away from something like that without a few scars.”

“Hmmm…” Steve hums noncommittally.

“Personally, I don’t like falling off trains into ravines…” he tries to say this lightly, to make Steve feel better, but it falls flat as they both acknowledge the truth behind his words.

“Buck…..” the soldier can hear the frustration in Steve’s voice.

“I’m gonna set us down where you guys use the bifrost. I figure we can get home from there.”

“Okay……Buck?”

“Yeah, Steve?”

“I’m sorry.”

“What for?”

Steve gestures back in the direction of the raft, “all that. I shouldn’t be….. I’m better than that. A little water shouldn’t do that to me.”

“Steve, that was more than a little water. I can’t think of anyone who wouldn’t have a tough time after that, even without what happened before. But just do me a favor will ya? Next time leave the shield. It can be replaced, you can’t”

“I know it can. That’s not the point. I wasn’t going to let the water have anything else. Its already taken enough from me.”

And Bucky can understand that. He lands in the open field and hops down.

“We’re gonna need a lift out of here.”

Reaching in to his pocket, Steve pulls out his cell phone, “I can call Tony.” He looks down at the water running off the screen and frowns.“Maybe not.”

Bucky snorts out a laugh, “maybe you should try putting it in a bowl of rice.”

He pulls out his own phone and tosses it to Steve. “Call him. I’ll ditch this,” he gestures to the helicopter, “and meet you later.”

“You sure?” Steve knows why, but he wishes things were different. He wishes that Tony could somehow forgive Bucky, but he knows that is not likely to ever happen. The look on Bucky’s face tells him not to argue.

“Yeah ok. Don’t be long. There’s a ravine just south of here-“

Bucky cuts him off with a grin, “a ravine? Is that supposed to be funny?”

“Hey, at least you’re not on a train.”

 

Steve is sitting on a blanket that they found in the helicopter, Loki laying next to him, still asleep, when Tony pulls up driving a large SUV. Steve is on his feet in a moment, picking Loki up. He carries his husband to the car and gently lays him across the back seat before climbing into the front.

Tony looks at the god in the rear view mirror, “is he ok?”

“He will be once we get him home,” Steve responds as he twists around in his seat as far as the seat belt will allow.

Tony puts the car in gear and starts the drive back to Steve and Loki’s home in Brooklyn.

“Thanks Tony,” Steve tells the billionaire when they pull up in front of the house.

Tony shrugs his shoulders, “yeah….. so the babies?”

Steve smiles mischievously, “we named the boy after Bruce and the girl after Nat.”

There is a flicker of hurt that crosses Tony’s face and it surprises Steve. “I’m kidding,” he hastens to add. “Would you like to meet them?”

“If its not too much trouble.”

Steve climbs out of the car and hefts Loki into his arms, “just let me get Loki settled in bed. He’s going to be out for a while. A few days at least, while his body recovers.”

Tony follows Steve to the front door, “so is that normal? To sleep like that?”

“For a Jotun, yeah. Gives the bearer a chance to recover and for the sire to bond with the child,” Steve recalls from his time learning from Jolnir.

Tony is just able to contain the giggle at the word sire, but just barely. He reaches out and opens the door for Steve. The blonde steps in and is greeted immediately by the sound of his twins crying loudly. He can feel Loki stir in his arms and walks down the hall way towards their room.

He passes by Natasha, who is reclined on the couch, looking much better than she did when he saw her last. The crying gets louder as he approaches the nursery and he stops to look in where he finds Frigga changing one child while Celia holds the other. The Queen notices her son in law standing in the doorway with her son held in his arms.

“They are well, just wet and hungry,” she reassures him. She looks Steve over before adding, “you seem to be in much the same condition.”

Steve huffs out a small laugh as the tension seeps from his body, “yeah, I guess so.”

 

 


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a companion piece over in The First of Many. Chapter 14 It is Envy.

Chapter 35

  
The next 24 hours are a complete blur to Steve. He lives in 2-3 hour increments at a time. Feed the twins, change them, get them back to sleep, check on Loki, try to nap, repeat. He vaguely remembers Bucky stopping by, but can’t remember talking to him. For the first 10 hours, he forgets to eat, until Frigga steps in.

As much as she wants to help Steve, she knows he has to be able to take care of the babies on his own. It was only when she realized the soldier had not stopped to eat that she finally had to say something. By the second day, Steve seems to have it more under control. Despite the limited rest he is getting, he insists that he is fine, even if he does show a flash of nervousness when she tells him she and the healer will be traveling back to Asgard the next morning.

“You’ll be fine Steve. It is time for you to bond with your children. You know everything you need to know.”

With a tired smile Steve responds, “I know. It’s just…… overwhelming is all.”

Frigga pulls her son in law into her arms, “it gets better. We’ll check on Loki once more before we leave. Now go rest while you can.”

Steve steps back from the embrace, nodding in agreement. Then he turns and walks down the hallway to his bedroom. Loki is still lying curled up on his side as he has been since they got back. After a short debate with himself, Steve goes to the nursery and grabs the rocking chair. He has moved it between the nursery and the bedroom several times, preferring to rock the babies in his own room at lot of the time so he can watch Loki. 

Once he has the chair placed, he goes back to get the second crib and move it to the bedroom as well. He has been keeping the twins in the same crib when they sleep and this way he doesn’t have to walk back and forth with them so much.

With the crib placed, he lays down next to his husband and closes his eyes until the next cycle begins again. 

And it isn’t long before Eirik starts to cry. Steve’s eyes snap open and he is on his feet in an instant, heading for the nursery. He does a quick check of the babies diaper and decides that must be the issue so he sets about changing the child, who settles down very quickly after that. He carries his son back to the bedroom and places him in the crib. It only makes sense to move the changing table now too, so he goes and gets that and spends the next few minutes arranging the pieces, while trying not to wake Eirik again.

When he is satisfied, he goes and gets Eiren and places her next to her brother and then lays back down next to Loki. When the next cycle starts and he feeds one baby and then the other, he decides he quite likes having them in his room. If he had a refrigerator and bottle warmer in there that would be even better…… and so he grabs his laptop and begins to shop.

 

When Frigga leaves, Bucky drives her and Celia to the field where they normally use the bifrost. In the car she turns to him and asks, “what troubles you Bucky?”

“What?” Bucky responds confused for a moment, but when he looks over at the Queen and she stares back with one eyebrow raised in a look that reminds him of a certain dark haired god of mischief, he knows exactly what she is asking.

“That obvious huh?”’

The Queen gives him a sympathetic smile before turning her eyes back to the road ahead.

After several moments of silence, Bucky finally speaks up. “I just, uh, I feel really selfish even thinking it. You know. Like, he’s my best friend and he has everything and I’m sitting in my crappy little apartment, alone, drinking crappy beer that I can’t even get drunk off of and I feel like shit because I don’t want to go over there and have to look at it all. I mean, I’m happy for them, but…… I guess it just makes me realize that I’m never going to have any of that?” He states it as a question, as though he is not sure of it himself.

“It is not selfish to want more for yourself, it is only selfish when you want it at the expense of others.”

Bucky only hums in response as he continues to drive.

As he parks the car, Frigga says, “Natasha should be fully well by tomorrow. She mostly required rest after Celia healed her wound,” Frigga nods her head in the direction of the healer who has been sitting quietly in the back seat.

“Yeah, I saw her before she went home.”

“She is a very interesting woman,” Frigga remarks as she gets out of the car and walks towards the center of the field, Celia following close behind. 

Bucky can only agree with the Queen, “yes…. She is.”

“What you need to ask yourself Bucky Barnes, is if you really want what Steve has and with whom you would share it.” The Queen turns her eyes skyward, “Heimdall, if you please.” And then they are gone.

Bucky pulls his cell phone out and before he can talk himself out of it, he calls Natasha.

“Hey,” she says in greeting.

“Hey,” he returns, “is it ok to come by?”

“Yeah, sure, everything ok?” Natasha asks.

“Uh, yeah, I’d just like to talk.” Bucky rubs the back of his neck with his hand nervously. 

If she picks up on it, she doesn’t mention it, instead she tells him to come by any time. “I’ll be here. I’ll wait for you, Barnes.”

 

Steve should be sleeping. He knows this and yet he continues to lay with his chest pressed close against Loki’s back, talking quietly, making sure the god doesn’t miss a moment of the twins first days, despite being deeply asleep.

“Eirik usually wakes up first. He’s louder than Eiren, but she’s fussier. There’s been a couple of times that I had a little trouble getting her to stop crying and she started to turn blue again. It fades once I get her calmed down though.” Steve moves Loki’s hair to the side and places a kiss on his neck. “I didn’t want you to be upset when she does it in front of you.”

There is a slight twitch of Loki’s hand and Steve wraps his arm around the gods body just a little tighter. 

“They’ve been sleeping in the same crib, its just easier and they seem calmer when they’re close to each other.”

For a few minutes Steve is quiet as he listens to the low breathing of his husband and children. 

“It’s so quiet,” he huffs out a soft laugh, “I mean when they’re asleep, obviously. But it gets so quiet. Especially now that your mom has gone back to Asgard.”

There is another pause while Steve’s mind processes what he wants to say next.

“No one else has come by. Bucky stopped by once. At least I’m fairly sure he did. That first 48 hours are a bit of a blur,” the blonde chuckles. 

“I can’t wait for you to get to hold them both once you wake up. I’ll probably get that big dopey grin on my face. You know the one. The one you tease me about. And don’t get mad, but I kind of promised you would read to them,” he smiles as he says this.

Loki ever so slightly shifts in his sleep, which causes his pelvis to press back and make contact with Steve, whose eyes open wide at the stimulation. The blonde pulls in a deep breath and closes his eyes again as he exhales.

Steve has never felt so tempted by anything in his life as he is by this. Or at least in this moment, he can’t recall anything. He tries to think about anything other than his husbands body and how badly he wants to touch and taste every inch of it. He realizes it isn’t working when another shift by Loki draws attention to the way the blonde’s hips are involuntarily grinding forward.

He debates continuing to lay there, using the friction from where their bodies meet to get off, but decides its wrong with Loki not awake. Instead, he gets up and walks into the bathroom where he immediately turns on the shower and then removes his sleep pants, boxers and shirt. When he is satisfied with the temperature, the blonde steps under the spray and lets it run down his back. 

He can only hold out for a few minutes before his hand drifts down and grips his cock. He doesn’t try to hold back the moan that he gives, but then his mind turns to the other room where his husband and children are sleeping. He purses his lips in an effort to stay quiet as his hand works along his shaft. 

It feels good, not as good as being with Loki, but he will take what he can get for now. He raises one hand and braces it on the shower wall, while his other hand grips tighter and moves faster. 

His hand stops and his head jerks up when he thinks he hears a sound from the bedroom. Whatever it was isn’t repeated and so he starts to stroke again, building up to the rhythm he had before. He is so close now, just a little bit more…. Just…..

His hand falters when one of the twins starts to cry. Eirik, he decides. He needs to go take care of him. He needs to feed and change them both. He needs…….

Gripping himself tighter, he resumes his strokes. His movements are harsh and quick. He needs this. He needs……

With a groan his seed splatters against the shower wall and washes down the drain. Steve quickly washes and throws on a pair of sleep pants before going back into the bedroom.

He gets a bottle ready and then takes his son over to the rocking chair where he feeds him, hoping to get the baby back in the crib before his sister wakes. Luck is not on his side and so he ends up prepping another bottle to feed Eiren. He has learned that the easiest way to do this is by sitting on the bed against the headboard, with them laying on either side of him. This way he can feed them both at the same. 

Once he is done, he carefully cradles a baby in each arm and then sits in the rocking chair, where he gently rocks them back and forth. It is peaceful and Steve is content, but he is overjoyed when he sees Loki briefly wake and drink some water before going back to sleep. 

 

 

 


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36

 

Steve stands outside in the backyard with a cup of coffee in his hand. The babies, now nine days old are asleep, strapped into a double stroller. His original intention had been to go for a walk to get out of the house, but the reality of the amount of gear he needed to take, _just in case_ , quickly set in and he decides he just isn’t up for the task right then. He’s tired and bored and feeling isolated. And most of all, he misses Loki. 

He’s had visitors. Tony stopped by and breezed around the house, opening doors and cabinets. He only stayed for about 30 minutes and Steve could tell the twins, who had started crying, were making him nervous. Two hours later a delivery driver stopped by with extra baby supplies and food for Steve. The blonde greatly appreciated the gesture since the refrigerator was getting low and he and Loki had drastically underestimated just how many diapers and how much formula the babies would go through.

Sam stopped by and brought lunch a few days ago. While he was there, he took it upon himself to do a load of laundry for Steve. It was nice to have someone to sit and talk to and when Sam helped with a feeding, the blonde was extremely grateful.

Steve was pleasantly surprised to see Bruce at his door the day after Sam came by. The scientist was timid around the twins, declining the offer to hold one of them. But it was a nice visit all the same.

Natasha came by twice, but only briefly. Steve couldn’t be sure, but something seemed off with her. Unfortunately, he has very little time to even think about what it going on with his friends. 

And then there is Bucky Barnes. The one person Steve expected to see a lot of. Bucky has not been by since that first day. Steve is hurt and a little confused by his best friends absence. This is one of the most important times in his life and not having Bucky there to share in it is disappointing, but he knows there has to be a good reason for it.

He takes another sip of his coffee and looks over at the twins again, not able stop the small smile that comes just from watching them sleep. The sound of the patio door opening causes him to turn to see who has stopped by now. He secretly hopes just thinking about Bucky has somehow made the man appear, but it is not Bucky stepping out onto the deck.

“Loki,” Steve breathes as he takes three large steps to close the distance between them. 

The god reaches out and pulls Steve to him, wrapping his arms around the muscular body. 

“You’re awake…When did you wake up?”

Loki can hear the pleasure in his husbands voice. “Not long ago. I saw you out here and took a quick shower. I felt positively disgusting.” He reaches up and touches his still damp hair as his lips curve up into a slight smile. His eyes flick over to the stroller and he breaks away from his husband to walk over to his children. 

Steve watches the god bend down to get a closer look, his hand gently stroking the cheek of first one and then the other twin. 

“How do you feel now?”

Loki doesn’t look up as he runs a finger over the soft skin of his daughters arm. “Positively ravenous,” he murmurs.

 

Pushing the plate of food away to indicate he is done, Loki looks at Steve, who is alternating between hovering over his shoulder and flitting around the kitchen.

“You look tired,” the god remarks as he takes in the dark circles under the soldiers eyes, even his movements are slower, less precise. “You should go rest.”

“I’m fine,” Steve insists, “besides they’ll be up soon for their next feeding.”

“I am capable of feeding a baby.”

“No, I know. Its just…..” he trails off, looking over at the stroller where they left the babies strapped in, not wanting to disturb their sleep.

Loki waits a moment and when it appears Steve is not going to continue he prompts, “its just what?”

“I missed you,” Steve says as he ducks his head.

The god can tell Steve is holding something back and is ready to question him about it when one of the babies wakes up and begins to cry.

“That would be Eirik,” Steve tells him as he begins unbuckling the child from the seat. “He usually wakes up first.”

Loki stands next to Steve and works on getting his daughter out of the stroller as well, “yes, you told me.”

Steve’s hands stop, “you heard me?”

“Of course I did.”

That is when Eiren starts crying. 

“Here, let me get her,” Steve says as he moves to take his daughter, “you can get him,” he adds indicating their son, who is still crying.

Loki frowns before gently pushing Steve’s hands away, “I’ve got her.”

“Loki,” Steve’s voice is tinged with worry, enough that Loki looks up to meet his gaze. “I just think it may be better if you-“

Stepping back from the stroller, Loki drops his hands to his sides. “What did you think I would do when I saw her like that?” He gestures to the baby and the Jotun markings that are spreading down her now blue tinged skin. The hurt in his voice is enough to break Steve’s heart and also alert him that he needs to tread lightly.

“Nothing! I just……worried. I didn’t want you to get upset. I know how much you hate that form.”

“On me, yes, but this is……these are our children.”

Steve resumes working the buckles on Eirens seat and then gently hands the baby to Loki, who immediately starts making soothing noises at her. “You’re right,” he begins as he reaches over to pick up their son. He is surprised when Eiren quiets in Loki’s arms, the blue fading from her skin. He tries to ignore the twinge of jealousy that he feels at the way the baby reacts to the god after he sometimes struggled to soothe one or both twins. “I’m sorry,” he adds lamely. 

“I’m going to choose to blame your comments on sleep deprivation,” Loki remarks, smiling down at his daughter, while he bounces lightly on his feet. “Come, let us feed them.” He leads the way into the kitchen and Steve counts himself lucky that his husband was not more upset as he follows after him.

 

Loki and Steve are in their bedroom, Loki gently rocking their son. Steve sits on the bed with Eiren on his shoulder, he is patting her back trying to get her to burp.

“You should try to sleep. You look exhausted,” Loki tells his husband.

“Thanks,” is Steve’s sarcastic reply, which causes Loki to grin. “But I’d rather stay up with you for awhile.” He ducks his head almost shyly, “I kinda missed you.”

Before either one can say anything else, Eiren burps loudly. Steve grins, right up until she also spits up all over his shoulder and down the back of his shirt. “Annnnndddd now I need a shower,” he frowns.

Loki snickers, “did you not cover your shirt?”

“No, I guess I forgot.” Steve has shifted Eiren to his other arm and is trying not to look at his soiled shirt. “At least I had a shirt on. A few days ago she got me without one. It was pretty gross.”

The look on Steve’s face, makes Loki laugh out loud, which he tries to stifle so as to not wake the sleeping baby in his arms. He stands and places the baby in the crib and then reaches for his daughter. “Here, let me take her. You go shower.”

The blonde hands her over as he stands and carefully pulls his shirt over his head. “Are you sure you’ve got her?”

“Steve.” 

Loki’s voice is stern and Steve’s shoulders rise up around his ears at the chastisement. “Ok, shower, I’m going.”

“Take your time, love.”

The tone of the gods voice makes Steve turn and look back at Loki, whose own eyes are running appreciatively up and down the soldier’s body.

Steve knows that look well and feels a pulse of want low in his belly. “Oh?”

“I thought I might join you in a few minutes. If that isn’t too much of a bother.” 

The light tease in the gods voice makes Steve smile and he cannot resist himself. “Didn’t you just take a shower?”

Loki quirks an eyebrow and just stares in response as Steve’s smile grows wider. “Ok ok, shower.” He takes his time stripping off the rest of his clothes, making sure the god gets a good look before heading into the bathroom.

Its not ten minutes later that the shower door opens and Loki steps in. Steve turns and immediately wraps his arms around the slimmer man’s waist. “I missed you,” he says, leaning in and kissing his husbands lips. His hands trace along Loki’s hips and up his sides. He pauses when he feels the scar from the birth. “Will this go away?”

Looking down at himself, Loki answers, “I’m not sure. If it doesn’t I will wear it proudly.”

He pulls Steve in for another kiss, curling one hand around the back of the blondes neck and resting the other at his lower back. A slight pressure on Steve’s back brings their bodies in close contact and Loki can feel the soldiers arousal as he starts to rock his hips forwards and back.

“Hmm,” Loki smiles, “you really did miss me.”

Steve jerks back, cheeks flushing pink in embarrassment, “sorry. Sorry.”

“Its ok love. Although, I’m not sure my body is quite ready for that yet.”

“Sorry,” Steve apologizes again.

“Don’t be. A couple of more days and I plan on ravishing you,” the god smiles with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. 

Steve’s blush darkens as his cock jumps and his pupils dilate at the thought. “I…uh….I think-“

He cuts off when Loki grips him firmly and begins to stroke along his length. Steve lets out a whine at the sensation and stumbles back a step until his back hits the wall. 

“That’s so…. God I missed you…..”

 

 

 

 


	37. Chapter 37

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a companion piece over in The First of Many. Chapter 15 Heartbreak.

 

Chapter 37

 

Loki walks in the living room in time to see Steve frown at his phone and throw it in frustration to land in the chair across from where he is sitting. 

“Bucky?” The god asks as he sits on the couch next to his husband. He gently tugs on Steve’s arm until the blonde shifts and leans his head on Loki’s shoulder. “Have you tried speaking to Natasha?”

“Yeah, she told me I need to talk to Bucky. I’m pretty sure she knows something, but with her its hard to tell.” Steve pauses to snuggle closer in to Loki’s side. “He still won’t answer when I call him and if I text, he only gives one or two word responses.”

“Well, at least you know nothing adverse has happened to him.”

Loki can almost hear the frown on Steve’s face, “yeah, I guess. I just don’t understand why he’s avoiding me.”

“I suggest you make it so he can’t avoid you. Go to his home and knock on the door. Don’t leave until he gives you an answer.”

Steve sighs tiredly, “I can’t do that. I need to stay here and help you with the kids.”

Pulling away from Steve, Loki looks directly at him, expression stern, “are you implying that I am not capable of taking care of the twins while you are out?”

“No! Of course not!” Steve backtracks. 

Loki stops him with a laugh, “I know love. Besides, Thor is back and will be stopping by this afternoon, he can assist me if I need it.” At Steve’s skeptical look, he adds, “Thor is surprisingly good with children. I imagine that someday he will have quite the brood himself.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes!” Loki exclaims in mock exasperation.

 

Steve knocks on the door to Bucky’s apartment and then knocks again. The third time he knocks louder, frustration mounting. He pulls his phone out of his pocket and is about to dial when Bucky opens the door. The former assassin turns and walks back into the living room, leaving the door open for Steve to follow. The blonde closes the door and closes his eyes, counting to ten, before turning around.

Even that is not enough to stop him from blurting out, “you wanna tell me what the hell is going on?”

He knows it came out harsher than he intended when he see’s Bucky tense from where he is now sitting down.

He tries again, “can you just….. why haven’t you been around?”

Steve's voice is plaintive, hoping there is a good reason that his best friend has been avoiding him. He’s tired, stressed and most of all hurt that Bucky has not been there for him. _Even Stark put in more of an effort_ , he thinks bitterly as he waits for Bucky to respond.

“I didn’t…” Bucky clears his throat before starting again, “I didn’t want to be in the way.”

Steve’s eyebrows furrow together, his mouth tightens before he answers, “bullshit.”

“Fine,” Bucky snaps. “What do you want to hear? That I’ve been sitting here wallowing in self pity thinking about everything my life isn’t. You’re over there with Loki and your kids, with your entire future ahead of you and I’m sitting here in a shitty apartment by myself. With no one and no future.”

If he expects Steve to sympathize and make him feel better, he is wrong. 

“So you're jealous? This past week and a half I've been learning to take care of twins, mostly by myself. I missed my husband and my best friend.” He holds up a finger to stop Bucky from interrupting. “Do you have any idea how isolated and alone I felt?”

Steve runs a hand through his hair as he starts to pace back and forth, “for the life of me I couldn't figure out why, you, my best friend wasn't around. And its because you're jealous?”

He breaks off with a bitter laugh and stops pacing to glare directly at his friend, “do you have any idea how jealous I was of you when we were younger? You had everything, you were healthy and strong, you had lots of friends and all the girls loved you and I had nothing, just you and my mom! And then she died.” His voice breaks a little and he has to stop to compose himself again. Bucky sits in silence and waits for Steve to continue.

“I was jealous. But I still kept coming around. Because we were friends Buck. That scrawny sickly kid from Brooklyn didn’t think he’d ever have any of this. And now here we are and I have Loki and these beautiful little babies and I thought you'd be happy for me. I wanted you to be happy for me.” Steve sounds defeated and heartbroken. 

He waits for Bucky to respond, waits for his best friend to say something, anything, to make this better. But it doesn’t happen and Bucky just continues to sit in the chair, staring at his hands. 

“I have to go, Thor’s stopping by today,” Steve tells him, pointedly and hurriedly walks out the door, trying not to slam it as he leaves. 

When Steve gets to his car, he sits in the drivers seat and stares blankly out the window. After a few minutes he starts the engine and drives. He should go home, to his family, but wanting to allow Loki as much time to visit with his brother as possible, he instead finds himself in his old neighborhood. He spends the next hour wandering around trying to see his past in the unfamiliar buildings. It doesn’t work and he ends up sitting in a coffee shop watching people walk by outside.

A young woman approaches from the right, pushing a stroller. Steve automatically sits up a little taller, trying to get a look at the baby. He watches as a man approaches from the opposite direction, greeting her with a huge smile and a kiss before bending down to coo nonsensically at the baby.

The scene is sweet and heartwarming and suddenly Steve has an overwhelming urge to see his family and so he leaves some cash on the table and heads home.

 

Loki turns towards the door when he hears Steve’s keys rattle in the lock. He’s holding Eirik up on his shoulder with one hand, while he pours himself a glass of water with the other. He has just a second to see the sadness on his loves face, before the blonde hides it away behind a smile and Loki has to take a moment to think about when Steve became so adept at hiding his feelings and why it took him so long to notice.  
He can’t say he is upset by the way Steve strides up and kisses him hello, or by the way he strokes his fingers across Eirik’s arm and talks to the baby in a slightly higher pitched voice than is usual. But he can see the hurt lurking just behind the cheer now that he knows to look for it.

“Where’s Eiren?” Steve asks.

Loki points to the new pair of baby swings set up behind the couch. “Thor brought his niece and nephew a gift.”

Steve walks over and squats down beside his daughter who is gazing intently at a group of toys dangling just above her. “That was really nice of him. I’ll have to be sure to thank him.” He reaches out and offers his finger to the little girl who immediately grasps it on reflex. Moving his hand back and forth, Steve makes silly faces at the baby before gently extracting his finger from her grip.

“How did it go with Bucky?” Loki asks as he steps past Steve to secure their son in the second swing. He turns both swings on so they begin to rock back and forth and then turns his full attention on his husband, who has yet to answer.

“Bucky?” he prompts again.

Steve looks at Loki and furrows his brows, “you cut your hair.”

“Your children have decided that my hair was the perfect length for yanking on. And so,” he gestures to the shorter hair, “Thor cut it for me. Do you not like it?” the god responds suddenly feeling self conscious. He reaches a hand up and twists a lock that now sits just above his shoulder.

“It's not that. Your hair has been long since I've known you.”

“Oh,” Loki replies lamely. Not sure what else to say. 

Steve steps close and grips Loki's jaw gently. He turns Loki's head side to side, closely inspecting his shorter locks. Letting go, he walks around the god to see his hair from the back. When he circles around to face his love, Steve reaches up and gently lays his hand on the back of the gods neck. Slight pressure is all it takes to guide Loki forward until their lips meet. 

Steve opens his mouth and deepens the kiss as the fingers on Loki's neck inch upwards. He tangles his fingers in the hair at the back of the gods head and tightens his grip, giving a firm pull that is just this side of painful. He is rewarded with a deep moan and he smiles against Loki's mouth. 

Pulling back, he fixes Loki with a smoldering look, "I think I like it quite a bit actually." 

Within minutes Steve has him pushed up against the wall and is kissing him forcefully. Loki knows Steve is trying to distract him, trying to distract himself, but no matter how much his body is crying out to let Steve continue, he reaches a hand up and gently pushes the blonde away.

“Steve,” Loki stops when the blonde tries to crowd in again. He firms up his wrist and stops Steve from coming any closer. “I want you to talk to me.”

This time the blonde doesn’t hide it so well and Loki can plainly see the flash of irritation followed closely by a look that Loki can only describe as lost. “Come,” he says as he pulls Steve along by the wrist to their bedroom. He guides Steve to sit on the edge of the bed and helps him off with his shoes and socks. The god continues to undress his husband until he is down to only his boxers. 

Once he has Steve laying down on his side, Loki strips off his own clothes and crawls into bed behind him and pulls the blondes back firmly against his chest.

“Tell me what happened with Bucky today.”

And so even though Steve doesn’t want to talk, he does. And when he tells himself he won’t get worked up over it again, he does. And when he tells himself he won’t cry, he just pretends it doesn’t happen and is thankful that Loki seems to be pretending for his sake too. 

When he has exhausted himself, he lays there enjoying the comforting warmth of the gods body pressed close to his.

He shudders when Loki presses a kiss to the back of his neck. “tell me what you need,” the god whispers, breath tickling across his skin.

“Are you….can you?”

Loki doesn’t need to be told. He knows what Steve is asking, knows exactly what he needs. “Of course.”

He takes his time preparing the blonde, only giving him the gentlest of touches. And when he is sure Steve is ready, he guides him on to his back so that he can look into those sad blue eyes as they become one.

“I love you Loki,” Steve breathes.

 

 

 


	38. Chapter 38

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The is a companion piece over in The First of Many. Chapter 16 Just the three of us.

 

 

Chapter 38

 

“Barnes! I know you’re in there. Open the door….. Or don’t. Makes no difference to me. I’m coming in one way or another.”

“Go away Loki. I don’t want to talk,” comes through the closed door.

The god huffs out an exasperated sigh and teleports himself directly into Bucky’s living room, “then sit there and listen, I don’t have a lot of time.”

Bucky scowls and grumbles at his friend, “I suppose Steve sent you.”

“He doesn’t know I’m here. And you’re going to keep it that way.” Loki pauses, waiting for Bucky to agree. When he doesn’t, Loki adds, “Barnes, I am not above resorting to violence.”

The tone of Loki’s voice makes Bucky’s head snap up. Loki seems so domestic when he is with Steve that it is sometimes easy to forget just how deadly he can be. The soldier only has to think back on how Loki killed every single man in that Hydra based where Steve had been captured when they first encountered the magic suppressors all those months ago. “Fine,” he finally responds.

“Good. Natasha came by yesterday.” He doesn’t miss how Bucky flinches at the spies name. “I spoke with her at some length.”

“She told you, did she?”

“Not everything, but enough.” 

“So you’re here to tell me to get over it? Is that it?” Bucky snaps.

With a sigh, Loki sits down on the couch opposite the chair where Bucky is sitting. “No, you have every right to feel the way you do. And to be upset. To feel like you are missing something in your life. I used to often feel that way. It is…. Hard….. to be alone.”

“Yeah, but now you have Steve.”

“And so do you.”

“It’s not the same and you know it.”

Loki tilts his head in acknowledgement. There is a part of him that can’t help but wonder what would have happened if Bucky had loved Steve in that way. He shakes off those thoughts as unproductive and turns his attention back to Bucky.

“It is not the same. And personally, I am grateful for that. But you do need to go talk to Steve.”

Running a hand through his hair, Bucky responds, “I know, its just….-“

“I’m not asking you to apologize. I am asking you to be there. That will be enough. And you better do it soon, before Steve changes our son’s name from Eirik James to Eirik Thor. Which is just awful.” Loki chuckles lightly as he stands up and heads for the door. 

“He wouldn’t!” Bucky exclaims in mock horror. He follows Loki to the door and pulls the slimmer man into a hug, “thanks Loki.”

When the solider holds on just a little too long, the god taps him on the arm and pulls away. “Don’t get any funny ideas Barnes. I’m already taken,” he jokes, pulling the door open.

“Ha ha, get out of my house.” 

Loki is glad to see the smile on Bucky’s face and he leaves feeling better than when he arrived. Now he just needs to get to the store to pick up the items he told Steve he would purchase and get back home before the blonde wakes up from his nap and notices how long he has been gone.

When the door is closed, Bucky leans his back against it and takes a deep breath. Loki is right, he needs to go see Steve. He heads into the bathroom to take a shower. Best to do this now.

 

Walking up to the front door, Bucky can hear both twins crying loudly. He inwardly cringes, thinking about Steve and Loki dealing with that all the time and wonders if maybe he isn’t as ready for kids as he thought. He raps his knuckles sharply on the door and it is only a matter of seconds before it opens, revealing a slightly frazzled Steve, who looks in need of both a shower and a good night sleep.

“Hey,” Bucky greets, feeling incredibly awkward after the way their last conversation ended. 

He in turn, is greeted by a blank stare. Steve’s short hair is standing up at odd angles and when he runs a hand through it, he somehow manages to make it worse. 

“Steve, I, uh-“ he is cut off when the blonde grabs him and pulls him into an embrace.

“I know Buck.” He releases his friend and steps back to allow him in to the house. 

“Where’s Loki?” He asks, not seeing the god.

“In the shower. Should be done pretty quick,” Steve explains as he picks up his daughter from her swing. “Can you get him?” He asks pointing at his son.

Bucky immediately picks up the crying baby, “hey little man. What’s got you so upset, huh?”

Even though his chest aches a little, holding the baby, Bucky can’t help but feel a pleasant sense of peace as he feeds the child who shares his name. And when he looks over and surreptitiously watches his friend, who was so immediately willing to forgive his selfishness, he wants to kick himself for missing any of this.

 

It is two days later when Loki answers a knock at the door. Eiren is tucked at his elbow, sleeping soundly. If he is surprised to see the dark haired woman at his door, he doesn’t show it as he steps back out of the way to allow her to enter.

“Mystique,” he greets without much enthusiasm, walking further into the room. 

She follows behind and smirks as her skin ripples, revealing her blue skin and red hair. She carries a folder in her hand, close to her body. That is when Steve comes down the hallway. He is dressed in only a pair of jeans, the smooth skin of his chest still glistening from his shower. His bare feet slap against the floor as he hurriedly intersperses himself protectively between Loki and the mutant.

The god smiles, from behind his husbands back, at the display. He feels a stirring low in his groin and has to refocus his attention on the matter at hand. Laying a gentle hand on Steve’s shoulder he applies just enough pressure to get the blonde to turn towards him. A silent communication passes between them as Loki attempts to reassure Steve with his eyes and Steve expresses his displeasure by the set of his mouth. The slight tilt of Loki’s head causes Steve’s brow to furrow and his lips to purse.

“What do you want Mystique?” the blonde questions over his shoulder, as he carefully takes his daughter from Loki’s arm and settles her into her swing, next to her brother behind the couch. 

The woman raises up on her toes and cranes her neck to see behind the couch. She hadn’t reacted when she saw the first baby in Loki’s arms, but seeing a second one causes her eyes to raise fractionally. 

It does not go unnoticed by Loki. “Do you have any children of your own?” he asks conversationally.

When she fails to answer, Steve asks again, “What do you want?”

She smiles with fake cheer, “I’ve come with a gift.” She lifts her hand and holds the folder out where either man can take it. 

It is Steve who grabs it, flipping it open. He scans through the documents quickly, not quite believing what he is seeing. “Is this all of them?” He asks.

“I am quite sure. My source was very motivated to provide all the details on the suppressors.”

Steve doesn’t like that tone at all and he looks up, narrowing his eyes, “who is your source?”

Loki takes a step forward and reaches out a hand to rest it on Steve’s arm. He has his suspicions on who this mysterious source is. “I think we can allow Mystique her secrets, in this matter,” he adds at the face Steve makes. “I think the more important question is, how do we know we can trust you?”

“You don’t,” she responds, seemingly unbothered by the question. 

Just as Steve is about to open his mouth to, no doubt, argue, Loki takes Mystique by the arm and leads her back to the door, “I’ll show you out.”

She walks backwards with Loki as she rakes her eyes appreciatively up and down Steve’s half naked body. The blonde sees it and immediately crosses his arms in front of his chest, having forgotten about his state of undress. When Mystique simply leers at him, he blushes. 

“Quit teasing my husband Mystique,” Loki warns. “You’re not his type.”

“Oh, but I could be.” Her skin ripples and Loki is left holding the arm of a copy of himself.

“Not even then.”

“Oh but look at him Loki. I think he rather likes the idea,” she laughs gesturing back to the blonde.

And in fact Steve is currently staring and the identical figures wondering just how identical they really are. Loki can see the way Steve’s pupils have dilated and the tenseness of his stance that she is not wrong. And isn’t that an interesting thought to file away for later. But for now, he squeezes her arm until she changes. This time back into the dark haired woman from before. Loki opens the front door and follows her out, closing the door behind himself.

“I have to say, I’m impressed that you kept him hidden all this time. I’m surprised none of Ross’s colleagues noticed you impersonating him,” he says, hoping to have his hunch confirmed. He is not disappointed.

 

When the mutant leaves, Loki goes back inside to his husband, who now has a bulky sweat shirt on. The god huffs out a laugh as he strides over and pulls the offending garment over his husbands head, revealing his all that gorgeous skin again. He leans in to kiss Steve, but the blonde places a hand on the gods chest.

“Did she kill Ross when she got what she needed from him?” 

Loki leans in again, this time Steve doesn’t stop him. The gods words whisper across Steve’s lips just before he closes the remaining distance.

“She wouldn’t say, but I don’t think we’ll have to wait long to find out. If she’s done with him, she won’t want to have to keep impersonating him.”

“True,” Steve pants. “Tomorrow we should really go over that file. It looked like 4 separate sites, we’ll have to plan to hit.” He crashes their lips back together.

“Yes…. Tomorrow……I’ll call Bucky…….. to come by,” Loki says between kisses. “But for now…….. why…… don’t you tell me…….. what dirty thoughts……. were going through your head…… when you saw two of me…..”

Steve moans into Loki’s mouth and drags him towards the bed room.

 

 


	39. Chapter 39

 

 

Chapter 39

Its early the next morning when Loki calls Bucky to come over. Ending the call, he sits on the bed watching his husband sleep. He can see purple finger shaped bruises scattered across the blondes upper arms, his hips and even a few on his ankles and thighs. The god had tried to keep any marks in areas that could be easily hidden, but he can already tell there are a few bite marks on Steve’s neck that may be harder to cover.

The serum and Steve’s magic should help heal the marks fairly quickly, but Loki figures he will offer to use his own magic to speed up the process once the blonde is awake. But that may be several more hours based on the state Steve had been in the night before. Too exhausted and sore to walk on his own, Loki had to carry Steve to the bathroom and place him in a warm bath to clean him up. The god had left him alone long enough to change the bedding, only to find Steve asleep in the tub when he returned. 

He had been so tired, Steve hadn’t even woken when Loki got up to feed the twins in the middle of the night. The god had been pretty tired himself and so he was grateful that they only woke up once.

Bucky arrives in time for lunch and brings a couple of pizza’s with him. He is just setting them down on the kitchen counter when Steve walks gingerly into the living room. 

“What happened to you Stevie?” Bucky asks as he looks his friend up and down. He can just see the discoloration on his neck that he suspects are a match for Loki’s mouth and has to suppress the smirk when Steve’s face turns a lovely shade of red. 

He congratulates himself for not remarking on the way Steve chooses to eat standing up, leaning against the kitchen counter, but it is harder to resist commenting on the bruising around his wrists that Bucky can see when he stretches his arm out and his long sleeves ride up. 

“Rough night?” 

Steve just looks at his friend and rolls his eyes before taking a drink from his bottle of water.

Bucky’s mouth opens, then closes, then opens again, “huh.” He would almost wonder if he was wrong, if not for the fact that Steve looks so content, despite his apparent discomfort and then there’s that little gleam in his eyes that he gets when he’s up to something. And, of course, Loki….. who looks like the cat that caught the canary.

Steve smirks around his bottle of water and picks up the file Mystique left the day before. He hands it to Bucky, who takes a few minutes to look it over. 

After several minutes, Bucky asks, “so how do you want to play this? We’ve got four sites here.”

“We’ll also need to deal with the restaurant Loki and I checked out, the one where they were shipping to the medical supply company in Florida, which we also need to deal with. We’re going to need a pretty large team to hit all these places at once,” Steve tells him. He looks at his husband,

“Loki, can you contact Sam, Scott, and Nick? I’ll talk to Stark and Nat and I’ll call Professor Xavier to see who he can spare since this benefits his students too.”

“I can also speak to Thor,” Loki volunteers.

“Yeah ok. That’d be great. Once we get our team together, we can work on a plan. Bucky, for now, I want you to come up with some ideas for tackling each site……” Steve trails off as his phone starts ringing.

“Hey Nat, what’s up?”

“Have you been watching the news?”

“No.” He glances into the living room and gestures for Loki to grab the remote and turn the TV on. “Hold on,” he tells the spy, “what channel?”  
“CNN.”

Steve relays that to Loki, who changes the channel.

_…….Ross was one of the harshest critiques of so called enhanced beings and was pushing for legislation to compel mandatory registration. This controversial stance has been met with vast criticism, but has been gaining ground in recent months……_

__

_……He has publicly denounced the activities conducted by groups such as the Avengers as dangerous to the general public, calling them rogue vigilantes with no regard for public safety….. ___

____

__

____

_…….Ross went so far as to have the former Captain American, Steve Rogers, stripped of his rank, calling him dangerous and a menace….. ___

______ _ _

__

______ _ _

_…….General Ross had recently been under investigation for misappropriation of government funds……. ___

________ _ _ _ _

__

________ _ _ _ _

_…..it is unclear if this played any roll in the apparent suicide……_

________ _ _ _ _

“Well, that didn’t take long,” Loki remarks as he turns the volume down and goes to pick up Eirik, who has been contentedly watching the stuffed animals dangling above his swing. 

________ _ _ _ _

The god then retrieves a bottle of water from the refrigerator and presses it into Steve’s hand, “you’re dehydrated,” he says at the face Steve makes.

________ _ _ _ _

Bucky snorts out a laugh, “yeah, I bet.” 

________ _ _ _ _

Grabbing a small blanket, Loki lays it out on the floor and proceeds to lay the baby down on his stomach before getting Eiren and doing the same. The god lowers himself to the ground and sits between them. 

________ _ _ _ _

Steve smiles fondly at his family and debates joining them on the floor, but thinks better of it, he still has a little work to do. He turns his attention back to his phone. “what is the news not telling us?” he asks as he puts the phone on speaker.

________ _ _ _ _

“Word is there was a file found with Ross’ body, from what Rhodey was able to tell me, there was enough in there to indict several high ranking officials in connection with the funds Ross took.”

________ _ _ _ _

“Good, we got our hands on some information ourselves. We’re putting together a team.”

________ _ _ _ _

“A team huh. Whats this team called,” Natasha jokes.

________ _ _ _ _

Without missing a beat, Loki calls out from the floor, “the Revengers!”

________ _ _ _ _

“The Revengers?” Bucky asked, while trying to hold back a laugh. Steve isn’t so controlled and can’t stop himself from giggling at his husband.

________ _ _ _ _

“Please tell me he is not serious,” Nat’s voice comes from the phone.

________ _ _ _ _

“I’m completely serious. I had shirts made and everything,” Loki responds, sounding very hurt, despite the grin on his face. 

________ _ _ _ _

Now Steve is covering his mouth to keep from laughing because knowing Loki, he will show up to their team meeting with shirts to hand out.

________ _ _ _ _

“I’ll have the file scanned and send it over to you. I want building layouts by Tuesday. Between you and Bucky, I want options and recommendations for each site by Friday. We’ll meet on Saturday to finalized a plan.”

________ _ _ _ _

“You got it, Steve. I better get on it,” she says just before ending the call. 

________ _ _ _ _

“I think I’ll head out,” Bucky announces. “We’ve already got the layout for the pharmaceutical company in Florida, so I’ll work up a plan to get in and out.”

________ _ _ _ _

“Thanks Buck,” Steve responds with a wave as he scrolls through his phone until he finds Tony’s number. 

________ _ _ _ _

He looks at Loki on the floor with the babies and decides that he is going to join his family after all. The god smiles sympathetically as he watches Steve lower himself slowly to the ground, where he lays on his side with his head propped up on one hand. 

________ _ _ _ _

“I told you, I would be happy to help heal you,” Loki offers.

________ _ _ _ _

Steve palms across the front of his pants, feeling his partially erect cock. Every movement causes a new ache to blossom and his mind to think, once again, about the night before. “No…… I, uh, like it,” the blonde explains with a blush, “reminds me of how amazing last night was.”

________ _ _ _ _

“It was quite good,” the god agrees with more than a hint of pride. “We do have something important to discuss regarding this mission, you’re planning.”

________ _ _ _ _

Running his fingers across the blanket to catch Eiren’s attention, he asks, “what’s that?”

________ _ _ _ _

“A babysitter.”

________ _ _ _ _

“Oh.”

 

 


	40. Chapter 40

 

Chapter 40

 

The living room is seriously over crowded, with barely enough seats for everyone. As it is, Steve had to bring in both rocking chairs, all the dining room chairs and a couple of patio chairs from the back yard. It would have been more convenient to meet in one of the conference rooms at Stark Tower, but Steve knows that having Tony and Bucky in the same room would be counter productive at best and more likely disastrous. And so he has his laptop set up so the billionaire can video conference with them instead. 

He walks around the room, picking his way through the mass of chairs as he talks, Eirik resting on his shoulder, while Loki sits in one of the rocking chairs feeding Eiren. Its not ideal, but it works. He starts by reviewing what they know from the file Mystique provided, adding in the information that Bucky and Natasha gathered while they were in California and Florida. He also covers what he and Loki learned at the restaurant/ assembly facility. The last thing he covers is the file that was found with Ross’s body. 

In all, they actually have a substantial amount of information. When Steve starts to go over the layout of the first site, Betsy offers to take Eirik to make it easier on him. Loki and Steve share a look when they both see what a natural she is with the baby. After going through the layout, he has Bucky go over his initial thoughts on infiltration, which are supplemented by Natasha as needed. Plans are discussed, modified and debated until each site has been gone over and a plan is put in place. 

They spend the next hour discussing who should be on what team, based on who works well together and what skills are needed for each one. The meeting is tiring, but productive and Steve lets everyone go home with the promise to meet up again in two days time to discuss logistics. Tony, Natasha and Fury are assigned the task of procuring transportation and equipment. In all, it’s a productive day.

 

After having put the twins down for the night, Loki follows Steve to their bedroom and watches as the blonde allows himself to fall back on the bed.

“I think the last thing we need to do is finalize the teams,” Steve tells him.

Climbing on the bed until he is straddling Steve, Loki responds, “tomorrow love. We’ll work on that tomorrow.” He lowers his body and kisses his husbands lips.

Normally, Steve wouldn’t put something like this off, but he’s tired and has something else on his mind anyway. “We need to talk about who is going to watch the kids while we’re gone.”

“I assumed mother would come stay with them. I already asked her and she agreed,” Loki murmurs as he takes Steve’s earlobe in his mouth and bites down oh so gently.

“Oh,” is the only response Steve is able to get out before Loki cuts him off with another kiss. 

The god nuzzles at Steve’s neck, alternating between kissing and nipping. He gasps in surprise when the blonde surges up from the bed, flipping them over. Wasting no time, Steve immediately pulls his shirt off over his head and then quickly works the buttons open on Loki’s, exposing all that pale lean flesh that he loves so much. 

Its not too much longer before Steve is sheathed in Loki’s body, kneeling, upright, on the bed, with the god straddling his lap. He likes this position, being so close, arms wrapped around each other. And even if it isn’t particularly fast or hard, it is so very good.

 

“Ok, so we have 6 sites to hit in total and I’d like to have someone who can fly or teleport on each team if possible,” Steve explains to Loki and Fury, as they discuss the teams for their mission. 

Nodding his head in agreement Loki points to the images of the restaurant, “this one should be the simplest, just destroy the equipment and get out. I would suggest either myself or Betsy to get in and out easier. And really, since I’ve already been there, it makes sense for it to be me.” He looks between the other two men before adding, “plus, I can also hit this site here.” He points to an office building about 1 hours drive away from the restaurant. 

Steve feels a twinge of disappointment when he realizes he and Loki will be hitting different sites. He prefers to fight with Loki at his side, but he knows it makes more sense this way. With the rest of the teams in place, Steve sets up a final meeting with everyone to finalize their plans.

  


Steve leans over the side of the crib, stroking his fingers gently over the wispy blonde hair on his son’s head. He trails his hand down along the child’s cheek, eyes flicking to the faint lines of his Jotun markings that can be glimpsed where the zipper on the front of his pajama’s has pulled slightly down.

“Steve,” Loki calls quietly from the door where he has been watching the blonde say goodbye to both twins. “We need to go.”

He can see it, the moment when Steve changes. The differences are subtle, but to Loki, they are easily seen. The slight stiffening of his posture. The hardening of his features. His entire stance. Even the timber of his voice. It all changes as Steve slips sideways into his role. 

Pulling back from the crib, Steve walks past the god out into the living room with a nod. He does a final check of his uniform pouches before moving to the kitchen table where the box with Loki’s blades and his shield are both sitting. Opening the box, he pulls out both blades, sending a tendril of magic, just as Loki taught him, into the protective runes etched into the blades before handing them to Loki, who quickly sheathes them within the black leather of his uniform, along with the dozens of small blades already concealed. Loki takes up the shield and infuses his own magic into the matching runes and then hands it to Steve to place on the harness across his back. 

Steve steps close to Loki, close enough to wrap his arms around the slimmer man and pull him into a deep kiss. “Lets go,” he breathes just before Loki uses his magic to teleport them away.

 

Fury stops the car down the street from the restaurant and looks over at the god. “You got this?”

Loki pulls his blades and with a toothy grin, vanishes. He reappears just inside the office located behind the kitchen. The office is empty and so he quietly pushes open the door to the shop below, draws his magic around himself to cloak his presence and makes his way down. There are three people working at the bench along the wall. All wearing white coveralls, gloves and masks. There is an array of small electronic parts laying in front of them and a box, with a dozen already completed devices. 

Dropping his cloaking, Loki steps forward and grabs the closest worker, quickly slitting his throat. A woman to the left grabs a gun from the counter beside her and manages to get off a shot, causing Loki to jerk back at the impact in his arm, before he is able to break her neck. The last worker tries to back away, hands held out in front of his body. 

Loki pauses for a moment, thinking. He could spare this man. But he will not. Its too early in the mission to have to think about captives. And so he doesn’t. A pulse of magic into all the electronic parts ensures they are unusable and a carefully set fire, covers his tracks. 

Inside the car, Fury is watching the restaurant through the rear view mirror. He doesn’t shift his eyes when Loki opens the door and gets in the passenger seat. 

“Any problems?”

“Nothing of note,” is the gods reply. He adjusts the mirror on his door so he can see behind himself and settles more comfortably in his seat.

Twenty minutes later, Fury starts the car and pulls away from the curb. They stayed just long enough to be certain that there are no other Hydra agents going in or out of the building. The few staff and customers of the all night diner were herded to a nearby corner, while the fire rages out of control, despite the presence of the fire department. 

“I wasn’t expecting you to burn it down,” Fury remarks sarcastically as he drives away. Earning him a roll of the gods eyes.

 

They had agreed ahead of time, that the small contingent of agents that joined them at the second site, would engage the ten or so soldiers they are expecting inside the building, while Loki and Fury infiltrate the lab which is the center of the operation. There they find four scientists working under the close observation of five guards. Crouching low beneath the window overlooking the lab, Fury jerks his head to the right before creeping along the floor closer to the door. He pulls his gun and waits for Loki to indicate he is ready. 

Flinging the door open, Loki throws two small blades forward, killing two of the guards instantly. Fury drops low and fires off three rounds. One guard drops, a second staggers back, but the third is able to get a shot off. The former director feels the punch in his shoulder at the impact of the bullet. It hurts, but Nick Fury has been shot before and in much more vital areas. 

Loki pulls two more blades from his uniform. One he jams up under the neck of the wounded guard. He yanks the blade free and spins to stab the remaining one, but his body stops and convulses violently as a surge of power travels through his cells. And it hurts. Oh how it hurts. The pain is blinding and consuming, the burn of fire, the sting of acid and the intense white agony of being torn limb from limb all coalescing into a single point centered right in Loki’s head. 

From the floor, Fury can see the crackle of power, as it arcs and travels over and through the gods flesh. He can smell the acrid odor of singed hair. Blue veins stick out from the gods pale face as his eyes roll back in his head until only the whites can be seen.

 

 

 


	41. Chapter 41

 

Chapter 41

 

From his position on the ground, Fury can see the guard that is using the energy weapon on Loki. He reaches for his gun, but doesn’t immediately see it. Glancing back to the god, he knows he has to do something quick and so he climbs to his feet and charges at the guard. In the brief second before contact, Fury’s hand strays into the stream of electricity and his entire body seizes in pain as he goes down, taking the guard with him. 

The guard rolls to the side and takes up his weapon again. He pulls the trigger, sending another deadly volley of energy at the god. During the brief respite, Loki had just enough time to pull his two long blades and he holds them up in front of himself defensively. He catches the energy on the blades and is able to slow it down. It still hits him, still enters his flesh, but he is able to control it, guide it, contain it. It hurts no less, but he doesn’t feel it consuming him. Although he has no doubt that it will in short order.

Fury struggles to his feet, hoping to draw the guard’s attack off Loki again. Before he can make a move, he hears a gunshot. Swinging his head around, Fury finds one of the scientists, forgotten in the fight, holding a gun, pointed directly at him. It takes him a moment to recognize the warmth spreading across his abdomen as blood.

“Son of a…..” he mumbles as he looks at the god again. He is glowing, eyes alight with the radiance of barely contained power. His face is contorted into a grimace as his mouth drops open, a scream issuing from his throat, guttural and deep. Fury can see the energy arcing across his teeth and through the roof of his mouth. There are wisps of smoke coming from his body. 

Fury’s arm feels leaden as he presses a finger to his comlink, connecting him to the rest of his team, “get every body out. Now.”

 

Steve is standing back to back with Thor in the center of a large warehouse. They are surrounded by Hydra soldiers, engaged in battle with what is left of the troops from this facility. There are two large trucks, fully loaded down, that Steve absolutely does not want to get away. Thor twirls Mjolnir and lets the hammer fly, taking out three more Hydra soldiers as Steve aims and throws his shield out where it ricochets against a wall and impacts against the mechanism holding open the roll up door at the end of the warehouse. The door slams down to the ground, trapping the two large trucks inside.

Running to the door, Steve grabs his shield and leaps across the hood of the nearest truck. He pulls the driver out and quickly knocks him out, then ducks behind his shield as the driver for the second truck pulls a gun and shoots at him. Thor is there in an instant and he disables the driver by smashing the side of his face into the truck door. 

“A dozen more remain,” Thor remarks, gesturing behind the trucks to where the last of the soldiers are waiting for the two blondes to emerge.

“What? You gettin’ tired?” Steve jokes as he adjusts the grip on his shield.

He gasps and almost drops the shield when a crackle of energy travels across the surface and shocks him hard enough to make his leg muscles clench and spasm. It dissipates just as quickly as it appeared.

“Loki….”

“Steve?” 

Steve stares wide eyed at his shield when he answers, “It’s Loki.”

 

It is only seconds before Fury receives the response in his ear that his team is out of the building. Out of the corner of his eye he see’s the scientist who shot him, open a tall storage cabinet that looks to be filled with the same energy weapons being used on Loki. Fury knows he is out of time and so he forces himself to move. He staggers forward and steps directly in front of the beam of energy, taking the full force into his own body. 

Loki snaps his mouth closed at the abrupt cessation of the energy being poured into his body. Fury! He has to get Fury away from that weapon. There is no way his human body can survive that amount of power. Loki reaches his hands out to steady himself and he sees the energy jump across his skin, between the tips of his fingers. 

“Loki,” Fury gasps out. Causing Loki to jerk his eyes up as he tenses to spring forward. “Burn it down.”

He knows he is too late and it is clear Fury knows it as well.

 

Thor doesn’t bother to ask Steve what he means, instead he simply jumps over the hood of the truck he is behind and lets Mjolnir fly. Running after the mighty weapon, Thor strikes at the soldiers, decidedly less concerned with hurting them as he was previously. Still behind the trucks, Steve spends a moment trying to focus on his husband to see if he can sense anything at all. To his dismay he cannot feel anything and even the magic infused into the shield is not helping. He needs to get to Loki, but to do that, there are twelve Hydra agents standing in the way.

He pops up from behind a truck and throws his shield taking out two. A powerful punch to the jaw knocks out another when he joins Thor back in the fight. It is only a matter of moments before they have the room cleared.

“Take me to him,” Steve tells Thor.

The god leads Steve outside and immediately swings Mjolnir, launching them into the air.

 

He hates himself already for what he must do, but Loki looks Fury in the eye when he does it. Pulling all the power together, he pushes it out, sending it crashing into the former director’s body. He barely has time to get a magical barrier in place before the entire building is leveled.

There is nothing left, only small heaps of rubble here and there, and surprisingly little of that, a testament to the strength of the blast. Loki can hear something, but can’t quite make out what it is over the insistent buzzing in his head. When someone lays a hand on his shoulder, he flinches back, spinning on his heel, hands raised defensively. He has enough presence of mind to register the lack of electricity sparking at his fingertips with relief. 

“Loki?”

Its Steve. And Thor. Steve is talking to him, but Loki can’t quite make out what he is trying to say. He wrinkles his brow in confusion and looks down at his hands again to be sure they don’t hold any danger, before allowing himself to fall.

Steve catches Loki before he can hit the ground and scoops him up in his arms. 

“We need to find Fury and the rest of the team,” Steve instructs, hefting Loki’s body so he can press a finger to his com and switch to the appropriate frequency for the gods team.

They find the team a mile away where they left their transports. Steve carry’s Loki the entire way, trying not to think too hard about the blood trickling out of both of his ears and his left eye. His eyes won’t stop straying to the streak of silver, beginning at this left temple, that has appeared in Loki’s normally jet black hair. 

Without Loki’s input, it takes a few confusing minutes of questions before Steve is able to determine that Fury was most likely killed when the building exploded after he called for the team to get out. Losing men is always hard, but this is more personal. And Loki, who is laid out across a couple of seats in the back of the transport, Steve can’t even imagine what must have happened. He radios in to each of the three other groups in turn. Natasha and Scott have finished with the medical supply distributor in Florida and Bucky is just making his way out of the facility in Maine with Betsy. 

It is Sam who responds from the site in California where he and Tony are. “We’re done here. Looks like in addition to the suppressor parts they were shipping out to that restaurant for assembly, they were also making weapons, high tech, Stark thinks energy based. He grabbed a few to check out before leveling the place.”

“Good. Great. Get back as soon as you can.”

Sam can hear the tension in Steve’s voice, “is everything ok?”

Steve looks over at Loki and frowns, “no.”

 

 


	42. Chapter 42

 

Chapter 42

 

"Can you tell me what happened?" Steve asks as gently as he can. 

Loki looks at him blankly. Blinks slowly, but doesn't respond. 

"Loki, I need to know what happened in there. What happened to Fury." 

He hates pressing the god, but he has to know. All he has right now is a destroyed building and a missing, presumed dead team mate. Loki turns away and gazes out their living room window, lips pursed together. 

Just as Steve is getting ready to speak again, Loki replies, "he's dead." 

Steve sucks in a breath. He was fairly sure Fury was gone, but to have the actual confirmation, now it's real and it hits him harder than he expects. Right now, he can’t think about that though.

"Okay. Can you tell me what happened?"

When Loki turns to look at his husband, Steve's heart aches for the pain he sees etched onto his features. "I killed him." Loki turns back to the window and tries to ignore the look of horror on Steve's face. 

"I need you to tell me what happened." 

Loki whips his head around and for just a moment there is a flash of anger, before it fades away again. "Do you not believe me?" 

And how does Steve answer that? So he doesn't. "Can you at least show me?" he asks sliding off the couch to kneel at Loki's feet. 

They have done this before. Loki has shared memories with Steve in this way. The god nods slightly and raises his hands to either side of Steve's face. His touch is gentle, almost timid. The blonde closes his eyes and allows the memories to wash over him. He watches as energy courses through Loki's body. He cannot feel the pain, but he is aware of Loki's memories of the pain. It is intense and overwhelming. When it stops, he can feel Loki's relief and how it threatens to drag him into unconsciousness. And then there is more pain. He tries to control it. To direct it. To survive it. 

And Fury. "Burn it down."

In his head, Steve can see Loki raise his hands in front of his body. He can see the harsh glow of too much energy as it crackles across his skin. It is mesmerizing and utterly horrifying. Loki is looking Fury in the eyes and Steve can see the resignation on the former directors face. Then he is gone. Everything is gone, surrounded in an impossible glow of energy that is too much. 

Steve lurches back from Loki, sprawling on his back on the floor with a gasp. The god looks miserable and scared and Steve can’t get up fast enough to wrap his arms around his husband.

  
"We need to get everyone together for a debrief," Steve announces as soon as Natasha answers her phone. 

Based on her conversation with Sam, she already knows something went wrong on Loki and Fury's mission, but as of yet, no one had any details. 

"Yeah. No problem," she tells him. "I'll call everyone together. 6 o'clock, at your place?" 

"Not here," he answers almost too quickly before adding, "there's a lot to go over. And with the kids here...." 

"You don't have to explain. I'll get it set up and text you the location." Natasha listens to Steve fumble distractedly for a few more sentences before she finally just makes an excuse to end the conversation. 

Setting the phone down, Steve sighs quietly and runs his hand down Loki's arm. The god is curled up on his side on their bed. His eyes are closed and if Steve didn't know better, he would think Loki actually was sleeping, but he does know better and can tell that the god is in fact awake, just no more responsive as he has been for the past few hours. Despite Steve’s attempts to talk to Loki, the god remained quiet, only issuing a small whine of protest when Steve scooped him up and placed him on their large bed.

 

Forty five minutes later, Steve gets a text with an address, thankfully not terribly far away. He bundles Loki in their car and heads out after spending some quality time with the twins. Even placing Eiren on the bed against Loki's chest had only achieved a small sad smile. But the hand Loki gently laid on her chest made Steve feel at least a little better.

The blonde had only spoken to Frigga briefly, just long enough to ask for her to look Loki over for injuries. Immediately after, she left the two men, understanding that Loki was in distress and that Steve was the best person to care for her son. Steve would have to be sure and thank his mother in law for all her help with the twins.

Pulling up in front of a run down church, Steve has to double check the address before he parks and gets out of the car. Sam pops his head out from a side door and beckons them over. Steve places his hand on Loki's lower back and guides him into the small church and down a set of stairs that clearly gets used for meetings of some type,

“I know a guy who oversees a veterans group here,” Sam explains to Steve’s questioning look.

The blonde nods once and takes a look around, noting that they are the last to arrive. And he is glad for that, anxious as he is to get this over with. He guides Loki over to sit next to Thor, not missing the fact that Bucky is sitting with Sam and Scott while Tony is standing against the back wall with Natasha. He can only hope that having Tony and Bucky together won’t back fire, but he has to trust that Nat and Sam can keep things under control because he really only wants to do this once and right now all his focus is on his husband.

“There isn’t any easy way to say this, but we lost Nick today,” Steve begins. He pauses to give his words a chance to sink in.

“Damn,” Sam mutters.

From his seat next to Bucky, Scott speaks up, “what happened?”

Steve tells the group about how Loki shared his memories with him and starts to describe the details of Loki and Fury's mission, but he is cut off by Tony, “I think we need to hear it direct from Loki.”

The stream of emotions that flash across the gods face is almost too quick for Steve to catch, but he doesn’t miss the shame, followed closely by fear? 

“I killed him,” Loki speaks quietly.

It seems as though everyone tries to speak at once and Loki visibly flinches with each new voice.

“What?”

“How?”

“I’m sure there is an explanation.”

“Had to be an accident.”

“Brother.” Thor places a hand on Loki's arm that Steve knows is meant to be reassuring, but the dark haired man twitches as though he wants to jerk away. 

It is Sam, whose voice breaks through everyone, “lets all calm down.” He turns to the god, “I know this can’t be easy. Just take your time and tell us what happened.”

It comes out haltingly, in fits of starts and stops, but when Loki finally stops talking the entire group sits in stunned silence.

“Loki, how are you doing?” Sam asks.

The god jerks his head up and narrows his eyes, his mouth opens to respond, but Tony cuts him off, “you were electrocuted Loki. Do you need to be checked out by a doctor?” He flicks his eyes over to Steve already able to tell that Loki is not likely to be very forthcoming about any of his own injuries given the circumstances.

“Frigga looked him over when we first got back. She doesn’t think he'll have any lasting damage, other than,” he gestures to his head, indicating the silver streak in the gods hair.

“New hairstyles aside, I think we all have a fairly clear picture of what happened,” Tony responds.

“Stark, must you jest about everything?” Thor growls.

“About most things, yes,” the billionaire quips. 

Loki jerks to his feet, “if you'll excuse me.” He heads for the door.

Steve immediately starts to follow after him, but is stopped by a hand on his arm. “I'll go, you guys go ahead and finish up the debrief,” Sam tells him before following the god out the door.

He finds Loki leaning against the old red brick that makes up the façade of the exterior of the church. He has both arms wrapped tightly around himself, head bowed. The god does not react at all when Same leans against the wall next to him.

“You know, back when I was para rescue, I had a partner. Name was Riley. We were a team. Had each others backs. Looked after each other. We were close, like brothers,” Sam pauses to take a breath, glancing at Loki to see if he has moved at all. He hasn’t.

“We got sent out to provide air support for a ground team while they extracted a couple of injured guys from a ravine. We came under fire from four different directions. Riley, he uh, he started falling. One of his wings was shot up and he couldn’t control his decent. He died on impact.”

“Why are you telling me this? Our situations don’t compare,” Loki lashes out.

“You’re right. They don’t. The difference is, you looked Nick right in the eye when he died. I had to watch grainy video from my body mounted camera so I could see that Riley went down after I shot him out of the sky. Friendly fire, its called.” He chokes out a half sob, half laugh before continuing. “You had to make a terrible choice, but I don’t really think there was an alternative that would have allowed both of you to walk out of there alive.”

“Is this where you tell me that you forgive me. Do you offer me absolution on behalf of your friends?”

“I can’t give you that. What you did, what happened back there, that wasn’t your fault Loki. You were in a situation where all of the possible outcomes were just shit, but you don’t need my forgiveness, or Steve’s, or anyone else.”

“Then what do I need?” Loki snaps, voice an odd mixture of anger and pain.

“You need to forgive yourself.”

 

 

 


	43. Chapter 43

 

 

Chapter 43

 

Steve watches Sam follow Loki out the door, eyebrows drawn together with worry. When he turns back to the room everyone can see it on his face.

“Ok, so clearly we need to talk about this and I think for now Thor and I should stay out of the discussion, for obvious reasons.”

Natasha speaks up from the back of the room, “I don’t think there is a lot to talk about.”

“Sure there is,” Tony responds immediately, causing everyone in the room to look at him. “Look, not that I want to play devils advocate-“

“Yes you do,” Bucky cuts him off. “You’ve never liked Loki and now this is your chance to say ‘I told you so'.”

“Bucky….” Steve warns, hoping to avoid a confrontation.

“What?” He snaps. “Its true. You know it is.”

Swallowing hard, Steve looks between the two men, “lets just hear him out.”

Bucky huffs in irritation and sits back in his seat, arms folded across his chest.

“Tony,” Steve invites the billionaire to continue.

“Right, so as I was saying. We have to look at his history. He has racked up quite a death toll since coming to Earth.” 

Steve opens his mouth to argue, but closes it again, with a nod of his head in reluctant acknowledgement. He knows that Loki is more ruthless than he is on missions. While its something Steve has been able to reconcile with himself, as he tends to err the opposite way and be too compassionate towards their enemies, he knows some people will never be able to look beyond the deaths.

“There isn’t anyone alive to back up his story either.” Tony waves a hand towards Steve. “I know he ‘shared' his memories with you, but you have to admit that its not in either of your best interest to admit that he outright killed Fury.”

Scott speaks up for the first time at this, “but neither one of them denied that Loki killed him. Although personally, it didn’t sound to me like Loki even did it.”

“Scott’s right,” Bucky adds. “I don’t see how Fury would have survived that energy weapon and I think he knew it. He stepped in front of it to save Loki.”

“But we don’t know that, do we? We only have Loki's word,” Tony argues.

“Ok, so how do we resolve this?” Natasha asks. 

Sam walks back into the room just in time to hear her. “Resolve what?”

“Stark thinks Loki killed Fury on purpose,” Bucky snarls.

For once, Tony doesn’t rise to the bait and keeps his mouth shut.

Sam considers for a moment before speaking. “We know that Hydra was developing an energy weapon. We have independent corroboration on that from one of the other sites and I’m willing to bet there is a paper trail showing where those weapons were being made. We just have to find it.” He looks directly at Tony, “how quickly can Jarvis get through all the data we gathered?”

Tony can't help but look a little smug, “already working on it. I can redirect him to prioritize a search for any reference to those weapons.”

“Good, get on that. And in the meantime are there any tests that can be run to look for injuries or damage on Loki? I would think that an energy weapon that powerful would have to leave some residual damage even with Loki's advanced healing.”

Steve silently praises Sam for being so level headed and gives a tight smile first to Thor, who has been extremely quiet and then to Sam. He has been trying to resist asking after the god, knowing Sam would have said something when he first came back in the room if there was an issue.

“Then I think we should get Loki back to my lab so Bruce and I can run some tests,” Tony announces.

“No way,” Bucky cuts in. “You’re not impartial in this either.”

Before Steve can say anything, Thor stands and looks at everyone gathered. “That’s enough! You sit here and argue Loki’s intentions as though you know what he was going through at the time. Did you not notice how Loki failed to describe any of his injuries? Can you not see, with your own eyes how grievously he is injured?”

Steve looks to his brother in law with a frown, “Frigga said he was ok.”

“Did she?” Thor counters.

_How is he?_

_He will be fine. He needs to rest_.

Steve had been so relieved to hear that Loki was going to be okay that he didn’t even notice the slight omission. He heaves a frustrated sigh, “no, she said he _will_ be fine. Not that he is.”

“Do not be aggrieved with mother. I have no doubt that Loki asked her to not reveal the extent of his injuries.”

“But I should have known. I should have seen. He’s my husband.” Steve’s voice is heartbroken as he looks towards the door, thinking about how he has failed to protect Loki yet again.

“Loki is well versed in hiding his ills. No doubt, given that he blames himself, it only makes sense that he would use his injuries as a form of self punishment,” Thor reasons. “I have the benefit of 1000 years of history with my brother, so do not find fault in your care for him.”

 

After several more minutes of discussion, it is decided that Thor will fly Loki to Stark Tower and meet Tony there, who will be using his suit to get back. A quick call to Bruce and he agrees to meet them in the lab so they can begin examining the god immediately. Betsy suggests that they also call in Dr. Hank McCoy of the Xavier Institute, so he can independently verify all results. Everyone else will stay behind and finish the debriefing. 

Steve goes out into the hallway to find his husband. The god is sitting with his back against the wall, knees drawn up to his chest. And now that Steve knows to look, he wonders how he didn’t see the pain Loki is in. Sitting down beside Loki, Steve scoots close until their sides are touching.

“Thor is going to take you to Stark Tower. Bruce and Tony are going to run some tests to see what kind of damage you sustained from that weapon,” Steve tells him.

The god doesn’t respond and so Steve continues, “I’ll be there as soon as we finish up here.”

There is still no response and Steve heaves a sigh, “Loki, I need you to trust me.”

Finally a response, barely a whisper, “I do trust you.”

“Then why didn’t you tell me that you were hurt? You can’t keep hiding things like this from me. Don’t you think I should know?”

Loki keeps his eyes down, focused on his hands. “I did not wish to worry you.”

“I’m your husband, I’ll always worry Loki.”

“Is this why you are sending me to Stark Tower?”

Steve raises a hand and rubs the back of his neck, “yes and no. I want you to get checked out, but it was decided that we should try to get some independent corroboration of what happened back there.”

Loki turns to look at the blonde, “why? I already admitted that I killed him. What else do they need?”

“They need to know for sure what happened. Its….. they just need to know.”

Thor steps out into the hallway, “brother, are you ready?”

Getting to his feet, the dark haired god looks to Thor, expression blank. “Very well then,” Thor states and turns to exit the building with Loki right behind him. 

They are already gone before Steve realizes he didn’t say goodbye.

 

Several hours later Steve opens the door to the lab at Stark Tower. They had managed to wrap up the debriefing relatively quickly, but the drive had been excruciatingly long. The first thing Steve see’s is a man completely covered in blue fur, bent over, looking in a microscope. At the sound of the door closing the man looks up, adjusting a pair of glasses perched on the bridge of his nose. 

“Ah, Captain Rogers. I’m Doctor Hank McCoy. You can call me Hank. Tony and Bruce went to collect one last set of samples from your husband.”

“Oh. Okay.” Steve looks around, feeling incredibly awkward, until Jarvis speaks up.

“Captain Rogers, Loki can be found in medical exam room 12, located just down the hall to the left. I have taken the liberty of announcing your arrival.”

“Thank you,” Steve tells the AI. Turning back to Hank he says, “it was nice to meet you.”

The Doctor smiles and Steve can’t help but notice the mouthful of sharp teeth. He withdraws from the lab and goes in search of room 12. Luckily its not hard to find. Located as Jarvis indicated, just down the hall. Opening the door, he finds Tony standing to one side of an exam table and Bruce on the other, drawing a vile of blood from Loki’s arm. 

“Hey,” Steve says when Tony and Bruce both look at him. Loki is reclined back on the table staring at seemingly nothing. 

“We’re just about done here,” Bruce tells him. “We need to run this newest set of samples and compile a report. Hank, Dr. McCoy,” Bruce corrects himself, “is working on some tissue samples in the lab.”

“Yeah, I ran into him already.”

Capping off the needle he was using, Bruce disposes of it and walks out the door with Tony right behind him. The billionaire pauses to squeeze Steve’s arm as he passes. 

“There’s a room set up for you guys.”

Steve nods to Tony in acknowledgement. 

“I don’t hate him you know? We just have to do this right.”

 

 


	44. Chapter 44

 

Chapter 44

 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Steve asks as he reaches over and tucks the strand of silver hair behind Loki’s ear.

Loki reaches his hand up and gently brushes Steve’s away. He quickly works the offending lock of hair into a braid and secures it with a tie that he conjures. “What’s there to talk about?”

“This. All of this. What happened with Fury, what’s happening now. Take your pick.”

When Loki doesn’t respond, Steve sighs, “I just wish you would tell me what you’re thinking.”

“What I’m thinking is that I killed Nick Fury-“

Steve opens his mouth to argue, but Loki cuts him off. “All the explanations and justifications in the world are not going to change the fact that he died directly by my hand. And all of this,” he waves a hand out towards the door leading to the hall, “is not going to change that. It may ease my culpability, but it will not change my guilt.”

Steve has to take a moment before he responds. “You’re right it won’t change anything for you, or for me. But this is beyond what I think and what you feel at this point. There’s more happening here than we know and I think its time we get some answers.”

Loki knows that tone of voice, Steve’s determined voice. Under any other circumstances, that voice would send a shiver of desire down his spine, but now, now it just makes him tired. He just wants to go home. He wants to lay in his own bed and hold his little ones and shut everything else out. 

“I’m going to go talk to Tony. Get some rest.” Steve leans in and kisses the top of Loki’s head before standing and walking to the door.

Just as his hand grasps the handle he hears, “I love you Steve.” It’s tentative and unsure and the blonde immediately turns back.

Leaning down, he gently presses his lips to Loki’s and whispers, “I love you too.”

 

As soon as Steve walks into the lab Tony sets down the tablet he had been working on. 

“Spangles,” he greets.

“We need to talk.”

“I agree.”

Steve pauses for a moment, not expecting Tony to agree with him, but before he can respond, Tony calls over his shoulder, “Bruce! Look! Cap’s got his confused puppy look on.”

“His what?” Bruce asks as he pushes his chair back away from the counter he is working at.

Tony makes a circular motion towards his face and then Steve’s. “Confused puppy.”

Bruce can see the scowl on Steve’s face and knows its time to shut Tony up before he makes the man any angrier. “I just finished the last sample. Now would be a good time to go over the results.”

“Yeah, ok. Jarvis, can you pull everything up. And call Hank back to the lab.”

 

The explanation is long and drawn out and some of it goes right over Steve’s head, but thankfully Bruce is there to keep Tony from rambling and being too technical.

“So if you look at these samples you can see the amount of cellular damage Loki sustained and the progression of healing over the subsequent samples. There is no way he should be alive. Asgardian or not. The energy was literally cooking his cells from the inside out.”

Steve blanches and glances towards the door, thinking about the pain his husband must have been in, is probably still in.

“Okay. But I don’t really see how that makes any difference.”

“We don’t have a body to test, but given the damage Loki sustained, it is likely that Fury may have already been dead when Loki blasted him,” Hank explains. 

“I don’t think that’s going to matter to Loki. In his memories, he is sure Fury was alive.”

Hank pulls his glasses off and begins to clean the lenses on his shirt tail, “that may be the case, but there is also an argument for the case that Loki was in so much pain that he was not in total control of his faculties.”

Steve frowns at that. “What are you saying?”

Bruce interjects, “just that his memories may be faulty and he may not have been in complete control of his magic.”

“Plus there’s also the fact that only a crazy person would allow themselves to be almost killed just so they can kill someone else,” Tony adds casually as he pops a handful of trail mix in his mouth. “Its not like he didn’t have plenty of other opportunities to do it, if that was his goal.”

“Stop talking with your mouth full,” Bruce admonishes before turning back to Steve. “There is also the lack of motive. It doesn’t make any sense. If he wanted Fury dead, he could have done it at the restaurant in the fire. Make it look like an accident. Plus we have the statements from the rest of the team who heard Fury on the comms ordering them to clear the building, then telling Loki to _burn it down_.”

“Alright,” Steve looks at Tony and narrows his eyes, “so is this enough? Do you believe him now?”

“Oh, I always believed him-“

“But you said-“

“What I said was I hate to play devils advocate.” Before Steve can argue again he continues, “you’re too close to this and we needed objective data.”

“For what?”

The display in front of the men changes, “I believe Sir is referring to this,” Jarvis says.

An image of a graying man appears on screen. “Mr. Stark, your presence is required at a senate sub committee hearing. Details on the date and time will be sent via encrypted message.”

“This came just before the debrief. The timing is too much of a coincidence for this to be about anything else,” Stark tells Steve. “There won’t be any denying our involvement once the questions start. We’ve got enough to justify the Avengers getting involved based on Ross’s files, but you, Loki and Barnes are another story.”

Steve nods as he walks a few steps away while he thinks. “So whats your plan?”

“My plan is to walk into that hearing with Romanov, armed with every bid of data we have on Ross, and the tech he was having built for Hydra. We have to assume they know about the raids. Which means everything is going to come out. Including how Fury died.”

Steve frowns, “so then why do all of this, if you’re just planning on telling them everything?” Steve waves a hand around the lab.

“Ross was hot for you and Loki. Anyone he was working with will be as well. They’ll call for his head and we’ll know who they are. These test results, along with everything else we’ve put together, is our best bet at keeping them from coming after him.”

“Okay,” Steve runs a hand through his hair, “but why the secrecy, why not just say that’s what you were doing?”

“Because none of us can look at anything Loki does objectively and that’s what we need right now. We’re all too close to this. But the numbers, the data, that doesn’t lie.”

“You still could have told us that’s what you were doing,” Steve presses.

For a moment, Tony doesn’t say a word. Steve continues to stare at him, waiting for some type of response. “Look, I’m trying to do the right thing here.”

Steve starts to say something, but Tony cuts him off, “if I told you I wanted to do this to help Loki, would you have believed me?”

And Steve has to stop and think. Would he have believed Stark? Or would he have questioned his motives and interfered? He wants to think he would have welcomed Tony’s support, but, the man is right, Steve does not think objectively when it comes to his husband. 

“What do you need me to do?” Steve asks.

“Have Romanov call me so we can pull all the debriefing notes together. Then take Loki home. We’ve got two days before the hearing and I want to get all our data verified by at least one more independent lab.”

“Thank you Tony,” Steve says as he turns to go.

Tony calls after him, “I told you I don’t hate the guy. I actually kinda like the bastard. But do not tell him I said that!” 

 

 

 


	45. Chapter 45

 

Chapter 45

Steve sits cross legged on the bed making silly faces and babbling at Eiren, who is laying on the bed in front of him. He glances to the side in time to catch the corner of Loki’s mouth twitch up. The god is reclining against the head board, long legs stretched out in front of him as he feeds Eirik. Its nice, this time together as a family and Steve leans over to kiss Loki on the cheek. 

He tries to keep his mind here, with his little family, but its hard, knowing that right now Tony is sitting in front of the senate committee. He has tried to act like he isn’t worried, has tried to focus on Loki as he treads through his guilt and grief over Nick’s death. The most animated Loki has been is with the kids and even then it has been subdued. The tiny hint of a smile is the most he has seen in days. 

And so he is surprised when Loki speaks up, “I was thinking, would you be up for going out?”

“Out? Out where?”

Loki sets the now empty bottle on the bedside table and shifts Eirik up to his shoulder. “We could take them to the zoo.”

“The zoo?” Steve echoes, incredulously. 

“Or maybe a fair or in to the city,” Loki responds, voice just a little too casual.

Steve is immediately suspicious, but decides to play along. “The zoo sounds good. When did you want to go?”

“Now, if you are up for it.”

The timing of this unusual request is……. After a moment Steve decides that the timing is actually perfect and it will probably do them some good to get out and do something as a family, a normal family.

 

Steve grins at Loki over the top of Eirik’s head. The blonde is holding the baby against his chest, bouncing lightly on the balls of his feet. They are standing in front of a large below ground display that lets you look inside the sea lion habitat. One of the large animals glides past the glass and Steve angles his body, pointing out the sea lion to the baby in his arms. A large group, with several young children, enter the room and the kids immediately crowd in to the glass to see the animals. The sight makes Steve smile again.

Loki glances to the side and looks over the group of what appears to be a multi generational family. He has been patient for hours and based on some of the looks being cast their way, this time, he thinks its going to pay off. 

“Shall we move on Steve? Give these little ones a chance to see?” He gestures loosely towards the new comers and then turns a smile towards the adults in the group. 

The blonde looks at the group of adults standing to the rear and nods his head towards them in greeting before heading to the exit with Loki pushing the stroller behind him. Steve stops when he notices that Loki is lingering near the large tank with seals. He walks back over and stands beside the god. 

Loki reaches into the stroller and unstraps Eirin, holding her to his chest in much the same way Steve is holding Eirik. Steve shifts his hold on his son and wraps an arm around Loki’s waist, pulling him in close. 

The timing could not have worked out better. The group from before emerges, with the kids leading the way again. 

“Excuse me,” a voice comes from behind the men.

Loki pulls away so they can both turn.

“Captain Rogers?”

Even though Steve tries to hide it, Loki can see the way he tenses and can tell the falseness of the smile that he puts on his face. “I’m afraid I’m no longer a Captain.”

The man, who appears to be in his late sixties responds, “my father was one of the men you saved in the 107th. You will always be Captain Rogers as far as I am concerned.”

Steve blinks, ”thank you. Uh….. this is my husband Loki.” He gestures to the god and Loki is proud of the way Steve only stumbles a little over the introduction. 

The man nods his head at the god, but quickly turns his attention back to Steve. “It was an honor to meet you, I’ll let you get back to your family.”

“Yes, you too. Thank you.”

Loki smiles brightly at the group as they trail out of the exhibit. Once they are alone again, Steve turns back to the water to watch the animals swim, “you want to tell me what’s going on here?”

The god watches one of the seals haul itself out of the water and on to a rock, “the political climate is changing Steve. Attitudes are changing. I have no doubt that Stark will ruffle many feathers today in the Senate, but it will also bring to the forefront those whom we can and cannot trust. In order to bring Hydra down, you need allies. Not just on the battle field. The country, the world even, needs a symbol to rally around.”

Steve turns to look at his husband, “Captain America was that symbol, but I’m not him anymore.”

“No, you’re not,” the god concedes, “and it is not my intention to suggest you take that mantle back from Sam. He is doing an admirable job, but you are more than Captain America. More than a title, more than a shield. Ross may have taken your Rank and he tried to paint you as a criminal, but that is not who you are. You are a good man and people can see it. They are drawn to it.” 

Taking a moment, Steve lets that sink in. “And all this?” He asks, gesturing around the zoo. “What was all this about? Not that I’m complaining," he hastens to add.

“This is about proving a point. Have no doubt that public opinion can be one of your greatest allies. You are a hero to generations of people and it will take more than just General Ross and a handful of Senators to destroy that. And you cannot possibly believe that we have lived in Brooklyn all this time and no one has recognized you?”

Steve’s eyes open wide, “I always try to be careful when I go out, use a disguise.”

“Ah yes, the patented Steve Rogers disguise, ball cap and sun glasses,” Loki laughs. “I’m sure no one can see through that.” He grins at Steve’s look of indignation. “Come, I wish to look at the snakes in the reptile house.”

 

Steve presses the end call button on his phone and sets the device on the side table before dropping down on the bed beside his husband.

“Tony said he is going to send over the recordings of the hearing first thing in the morning for you to look over.”

Looking up from his book, Loki nods, “I’ll go over them and see if I can identify any potential allies. Natasha is very astute at this sort of thing as well, so I will ask her to help me.”

“Great,” Steve responds as he reaches over and takes the book out of Loki’s hands.

He places it on the table along side his phone before inching closer and pulling the god into his arms. “How are you doing?”

“I am….. fine….. I suppose.”

“Fine?”

“Having something to take my mind off….. Nick…. helps.”

Steve doesn’t respond. Instead, he tightens his grip around Loki and runs his fingers through his hair.

 

The hearing is boring, mostly. Even Tony’s snark cannot keep Loki’s eyes from drooping as he watches the recordings from the small camera Tony had concealed in his suit. 

“Pretty boring stuff,” Natasha remarks from beside him.

“I cannot believe Stark made it through the entire thing,” Loki quips.

Natasha hums, “occasionally he can act like a grown up.”

Loki stops the recording on a shot of the full committee and turns to Natasha, “I figured one of them would bring up Nick’s death.”

“They will. See these three here,” she gestures to the screen, “this is where its going to come from, but its too early for them to tip their hand.”

“These two,” Loki says, pointing to the screen, “look like they may be worth talking too.”

The spy points to one of them, “I agree. Senator Caldwell has spoken out for mutant rights on several occasions. She hasn’t been in office long, but has a lot of influence because of her families name. Old money, but she seems to have a level head.”

“And him?” Loki asks about the second person, sitting to the side of the committee, “who is he?”

“Yeah, that’s interesting. General Watson. He’s actually over seeing the whole Ross thing.”

“So all we need to do is help General Watson connect the dots between the money used to make the suppressors, General Ross, the Raft and Hydra,” Loki surmises dryly. 

“We’ll be working on that, but there is another issue we have to deal with,” she says.

Although he is sure he already knows, Loki asks anyways, “and what’s that?”

“These guys,” she gestures to the screen again, “they know Steve is a threat to Hydra. They’re going to come after him and they’ll use you to do it.”

Loki frowns and looks away. This isn’t anything he didn’t already know, but it is still hard to hear. 

“You have to be prepared for everything to come out. Not just Fury, but everything before that too. And they’ll do more than Ross did.”

The god nods in acknowledgement. “When Steve is tied to me, it will not be good.”

“No, it won’t,” Natasha agrees. “The best thing Steve has going for him is his name and reputation. We just need to tie you to him, instead of the other way around.”

For the first time Loki actually smiles and Natasha can’t help but notice the mischievous edge to it. “Luckily, I’ve already started working on that. Did I tell you we went to the zoo yesterday?”

 

 


	46. Chapter 46

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki sets his plan into motion.

 

Chapter 46

Steve wakes up and the first thing he noticed is Loki pressed up against his back, the second thing is Eirik fussing and the third is the clock reading 6:42am. He furrows his brow and tries to extract himself from Loki’s grip, but the god just pulls him in tighter.

“Where are you going?” He mumbles sleepily.

“Eirik….., but I’ve got it. I must have slept through their night feeding, so you go back to sleep.”

Loki reluctantly releases his husband and immediately shifts to lay in Steve’s warm spot. “They slept through the night,” he murmurs as he burrows down further into the blankets, clearly not really awake.

Steve just smiles and picks the baby up out of the crib. “In that case, guess who’s gonna move back into their nursery so your dad and I can have our room back?” He coos at the infant. “That’s right, you and your sister.”

 

“Central Park, huh?”

“Yes, I understand it to be quite lovely.”

“And exposed.”

“Don’t think of it as exposed, think of it as public relations. Oh and we have plans to meet Stark for dinner.”

Steve gives his husband a skeptical look, “I just feel weird…. taking the kids out like this….” 

“I know. And if I had my choice, I would hide you and the twins away from the world and keep you all to myself, but we know that isn’t really an option.” The god buckles Eiren in to her car seat and then straightens back up. “If you’re good, I may even buy you a hot dog from one of those street vendors for lunch,” he teases before planting a chaste kiss on Steve’s lips.

The blonde chuckles as he gets in the drivers seat, “oh well, in that case, lets go.”

 

Steve has to admit, the park is nice and even though the twins are really too young to get anything out of it, it still feels good to get out. And Loki is true to his word and does indeed buy him a hotdog, two in fact, but only after Steve agrees to forgo wearing his hat and sunglasses.

He is recognized twice over the course of the afternoon. The first time is by a man whose wife is deployed over seas. He asks for a picture to send her and Steve immediately agrees. They talk for quite a while, only parting when Eiren starts to fuss and Steve realizes he enjoyed it, really enjoyed it.

The second time is even more rewarding. Loki spots a young boy standing off to their left. He is wearing a faded and well worn Captain America shirt, obviously a hand me down since Captain America merchandise was only sold for a brief time when Steve first came out of the ice. When the god points the boy out to Steve, the child edges closer to what must be an older brother, tugging gently on the older boys sleeve. 

Both boys look over, heads close together as they talk. After a minute, the older boy grabs the younger by the hand and they both head over. 

Steve smiles brightly, “hi!”

It is the older boy who responds, “are you Captain America? My brother thinks you are.”

“Well, I-“

“Yes. He is,” Loki cuts in with a quick look at his husband.

Emboldened by being correct, the younger boy takes a half step forward, “how come you don’t fight bad guys anymore?”

Steve looks to Loki for help, not entirely sure how to answer. Thankfully the god is prepared. “Steve still helps people and stops bad guys.”

The older boy eyes Loki skeptically, “who are you?”

“Are you a hero too?” the younger one asks at the same time.

“I am Loki,” the god states simply, figuring it would be best to avoid any details about himself. 

“Are you a hero?” the boy asks again, causing Steve to grin.

“I go where Steve goes.”

The teen looks between the two men, then at the stroller beside them, before finally glancing at their left hands. “Uh huh.”

“Do you know Iron Man?” The younger boy asks excitedly.

Steve chuckles, “yes we do. In fact, we are having dinner with him tonight.”

“Whoa…. He’s so cool. Not as cool as you though!” he adds hastily.

“Thank you. I really appreciate that.”

The teen speaks up, “that other guy, that new Captain America, do you know him?”

“Sam? Yeah I know him. He’s a good friend of mine.”

“How come he’s Captain America now?”

Steve glances at his husband who just grins. “Because I asked him to and I think he’s doing a really good job.”

The teens phone beeps and he pulls it out, glancing at the screen before putting it away. He takes his brother by the hand again, “c’mon Jake, we have to get back to mom.” 

Jake reluctantly starts to walk backwards, “I like his wings!” the younger boy exclaims. “But you’re still my favorite.”

Steve laughs, “thanks.”

Jake looks up at his brother pleadingly and then breaks away from his brother. He runs back and grabs Steve around the waist in a hug. 

The teen rolls his eyes and walks back to the men. “Would you mind taking a picture with him?” He asks as he pulls his phone from his back pocket. 

“I don’t mind at all.”

 

Somehow Steve had thought they would be having dinner at Stark Tower, but he really should have known better. At least the restaurant isn’t fancy so Steve doesn’t feel awkward dressed in his jeans and button down shirt, not to mention the two infants in their carriers on either side of him at the table. 

At least the food is good, even if it is hard to eat when he is holding a baby to his shoulder. Tony laughs when Loki leans over and cuts Steve’s meat for him and the god just grins, “jealous Stark?”

“You two,” Tony points between the two men, “you can just keep your little piece of domestic fluff.”

Loki snickers as he leans over to check on Eirik who is laying contently in his carrier, reaching up for the toy shapes dangling above him.

“I got another summons today,” Tony announces.

Steve can’t stop the frown that creeps across his features, but it doesn’t stay when his daughter blinks her green eyes at him sleepily. He shifts her and lays her back in her carrier so he can resume eating. 

Around a mouthful of chicken, Steve asks “same thing as before?”

“Don’t know yet. Probably more of the same.”

Loki looks up, “how long do we have?”

“This one’s not for three weeks.”

“Then we have some plans to make,” Loki remarks before turning to Steve, “how do you feel about visiting some museums?”

“Huh?”

“Stark, can you get us a pair of tickets to the theatre? Maybe a dinner reservation?”

“Kid friendly?”

Loki gives his husband an appraising look, which causes Steve to blush under the scrutiny. “No, not this time. And I’ll need a name of a place to procure some appropriate formal wear.”

“Ohhhh, Steve’s got a date,” Tony teases. He turns to Loki with a grin, “if you play your cards right and buy him a nice dinner, he may even let you get to first base with him.”

Steve decides to play along and heaves a fake, put upon sigh, “only first base?”

Tony turns serious for a moment, “don’t let him pressure you in to sex Steve. Not until you’re ready.”

He tries to keep a straight face, but in the end, Steve can’t and he snorts out a laugh. In all it was a good day. And even though his is nervous about spending more time in the public for the sake of his image, he is kind of looking forward to going out to the theatre and a nice dinner with his husband.

 

 


	47. Chapter 47

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a companio piece over in The First of Many. Chapter 21 Slow and Deliberate.

 

Chapter 47

Speechless. Steve is completely speechless when Loki comes in the living room. The blonde had been leaving instructions for Betsy while Loki finished getting ready. But Steve stops mid sentence when he sees his husband in his black slacks, paired with white dress shirt, black tie and long black suit coat, that falls to within a few inches of his knees. The slim fit of his suit highlights his long lean frame and the green and gold scarf he drapes around his neck sets off the bright green of his eyes.

Suddenly Steve feels inadequately under dressed in his silvery gray suit, light gray shirt and blue tie. He watches as Loki tugs a set of black leather gloves on and has to drag his eyes away, back to Betsy. 

“Go. I’ve got this. Thor will be here in less than an hour to help. You don’t need to worry,” she tells him with a grin.

“I know, its just-“

“Steve. Its fine. They can handle it. And Thor has been looking forward to spending time with his niece and nephew. You wouldn’t deprive him of that now would you?” Loki asks, giving Steve his best innocent look. 

“Well no-“

"Betsy was so excited about watching the twins, she practicaly screamed when I asked her," Loki teases, flashing a smile to Betsy.

"I really did," she laughs. "Thor and I are going to stay up all night and watch movies, it'll be great!"

Steve furrows his brows, "all night?"

Loki jumps in, “And after all the trouble Stark went to, to get reservations for us-“

“No you’re right.” Steve rolls his eyes and reaches out grabbing Loki’s hand.

With a grin to Betsy, the god laughs, “don’t wait up,” before he teleports them to the garage at Stark tower where a car is waiting for them. 

 

Once they are in the back of the car, Loki leans over to Steve and whispers in his ear, “you look so good, I’m almost tempted to forgo our night out and just have you right here.” 

“I’m…uh….not sure….I mean…..” 

Loki rakes his eyes up and down Steve’s body, enjoying the blush that spreads across the blonde’s cheeks and down his neck. Leaning in, he takes Steve’s hand and places it on his half hard cock, “you have no idea what you do to me.”

Steve just groans, slouches down lower in the seat and tries to discretely adjust himself.

The car pulls up in front of the restaurant and the driver opens the door for the men to get out. There is a small group of people standing outside to the side and immediately Steve is assaulted with the flash of cameras. He flinches back involuntarily and stops in his tracks, until Loki grabs him by the hand and leads him inside. 

“What was that?” he asks once they are seated at their table. 

Loki waves a hand nonchalantly, “it is entirely possible that Stark may have tipped off a select few reporters that you would be here.”

The corners of Steve’s mouth turn down, “I wish he wouldn’t have done that.”

Loki picks up his wine glass and smiles coyly over the top of it. “The point of being seen in public, is to be seen in public love.”

 

Leaving the restaurant is much worse, as more reporters have gathered outside. This time they shout questions in addition to taking photos. Steve hates it and he is grateful to have Loki, who is a natural at handling this type of thing, at his side. 

“Come love, lets give them a few good shots and then we can go,” the god murmurs. 

“I really don’t want to do this.”

“Play nice and I’ll make it worth your while,” the god teases quietly as he flashes a grin for the cameras. “Just give them your old war bond selling smile.”

Steve laughs and responds, “this _better_ be worth my while.”

 

It is more of the same at the theatre and Steve is grateful to get inside and take his seat. He doesn’t remember much about the show. He does, however, remember the weight of Loki’s hand on his thigh. He also, remembers the way the god keeps his hand on the small of his back, warm and reassuring, as Steve talks and takes pictures with anyone who approaches during the intermission. And its not so bad, with one very notable exception.

As they get ready to leave, Steve tries to put it out of his mind, tries to focus on all the positive things people said, but he can’t. Even though he poses for some pictures outside of the theatre, his smile is not so bright.

 

Back in the car, Steve turns to his husband, “I’m sorry.”

Loki blinks at him, “for what?”

“For what that lady said.”

“Ah, I see. Well rest assured that was not the first time I have been called a monster. Or a murderer for that matter.” Loki replies just a little too nonchalantly.

Steve frowns at his husband. “You’re not either of those things,” he insists.

“You cannot deny that the deaths of all those Shield employees was my fault.”

“But you weren’t yourself! God Loki, you were tortured and mind controlled and sent here.”

“That does not negate the fact that it happened by my hand.” Loki lifts a hand to quiet Steve when the blonde scowls and opens his mouth to protest. “This is what people know of me, if they know anything at all.”

“Well, I don’t think that about you.” 

Steve is indignant and it makes Loki smile softly at he lifts a hand to cup the side of his face, “no, you wouldn’t, would you. But this is part of the reason we have to do this. You need to be seen and I need to be seen with you.”

 

Back in the parking garage, Loki takes Steve’s hand, “I’d like to show you something.” He waits a moment for the blonde to nod his agreement before opening the way to Yggdrasil. They arrive in front of a small home, with a simple garden in the front.

Steve turns to his husband, eyes drawing together when he sees the sadness on Loki’s face. “What’s this?”

“This is the home of Mary Armstrong.”

Steve looks at Loki blankly, not sure if that name is supposed to mean anything to him or not. 

“Her sister Lisa was one of those killed that day. She left behind two sons, both living with Mary now. The oldest, Scott, wants to be an astronaut. Billy isn’t sure, but he loves baseball. He’s quite good too.”

Loki walks closer, along the sidewalk, “this home was purchased using funds set aside for each of the surviving families. Carefully routed and sourced to look as though the funds are coming from a remnant of SHIELD. There are many such homes, dozens upon dozens, along with scholarships, trust funds, tuition payments, any other manor of assistance that can be given.”

Steve’s mouth drops open at the implication of what Loki is telling him.

“I cannot bring back their loved ones. And no amount of money will ever undo the destruction I have wrought upon their lives, but-“

He is cut off when Steve pulls him in to a desperate hug. “Why didn’t you tell me?” He whispers against the gods neck. 

“I do not do this for recognition. I do it for penance. I only revealed it now so you can understand that I accept responsibility for my actions and will continue to do so. I do not want your faith in me to waiver, or for you to defend me blindly, when they use me to get to you. And they will. I only ask that this,” he waves a hand out towards the house, “remains between us.”

“But-“

Loki pulls away and gazes at the house again. “I think we should go to the park tomorrow.” 

“Loki-“

“Or would you prefer something else?”

“Loki-“ Steve reaches out and takes Loki’s hand, but he is cut off again.

“A picnic?”

“Loki….” Steve breathes as he pulls the god into his arms and runs his hand up and down, along his back. He can feel Loki tense against him before drawing his arms up to wrap around Steve’s waist. 

“I’m sorry,” Loki apologizes, “I seem to have ruined our night out.”

Leaning back enough to look into the gods eyes, Steve says, “no. You’ve made it amazing. You’re amazing.” 

"Come, I will take us home." 

"Home? I thought we were staying out. Isn't that why you have Thor and Betsy staying over?"

"Originally, yes."

Steve leans in and whispers in the gods ear, "then take me where ever you planned on us staying. I feel the need to show you just how amazing you are."

 

 


	48. Chapter 48

 

Chapter 48

 

Steve likes the park. Not too close to their home, but not terribly far away. It does necessitate driving, but with all the gear they end up taking for the twins, it works out. There is a nice jogging path and the blonde has taken to doing his daily runs there, while Loki entertains the kids.

Every day that they are there, they attract more and more attention. Most of it good, but some bad and not all of it directed at Loki. The god doesn’t shy away from it though and ensures that they arrive at the park at the same time everyday and sit in the same spot. 

A few times, Steve started to ask Loki why he does that, but once they are approached by a young man in a suit and Steve is handed a summons, he understands why. And he is grateful to the god for making sure he could be easily found in public rather than have someone from the government show up at their home.

Sitting on the ground next to Loki, Steve scans through the document before handing it to the god.

“How convenient that it coincides with Starks summons,” he remarks dryly.

 

Steve utterly hates these things and he is grateful when he is called to speak before the committee of three early in the day. It starts out innocuous enough, with basic background information on his military service, leading up to being pulled from the ice. He finds it odd that nothing is said about the Avengers, but keeps it to himself.

“Mr. Rogers, are you aware that just a few weeks ago there was a coordinated attack on several facilities, including a laboratory, a shipping facility, a restaurant, a private sector tech manufacturer and a medical supply company?” Senator Grant asks.

Steve leans forward slightly to ensure the small microphone picks up his reply. “Yes.”

There is a pause when the committee member waits for more, but Steve just sits back in his seat.

With a huff the man asks, “would you care to elaborate?”

Steve finds it really hard to hold back the smirk that wants to spread across his face and silently curses Loki for being such a bad influence when he answers, “Yes, I am aware.”

There is silence for approximately twenty seconds before the committee member gets frustrated.

“Mr. Rogers. Can you confirm that you led these attacks without the approval or sanction of any authorized United States government agency?”

“Yes.”

The man sits back in his chair, clearly frustrated with Steve’s responses. A woman, Senator Johns, leans forward this time, “Mr. Rogers. You were summoned before this committee to answer questions regarding the coordinated attacks on several locations, including civilian facilities. We can compel your responses if necessary.”

Steve blinks at her and tries again to suppress his smirk. “I have answered. Maybe you should ask better questions or at least stop wasting time and ask the ones you really want. I have a family to get home to.”

An older man, with graying hair, Senator Green, picks up a note pad and adjusts his glasses and all Steve can think as he prepares to speak is ‘ _finally_ ’.

“Mr. Rogers. It has come to our attention that there were casualties as a direct result of these attacks. Specifically the death of Nicholas Fury, former director of SHIELD.”

When he doesn’t elaborate Steve asks, “is there a question in there?” _Here it comes_.

“Please explain the circumstances leading up to former Director Fury’s death.”

Steve finds it interesting, but not surprising, that they are completely glossing over the reason for the raids. Clearly they don’t want him to talk about any links between the facilities and Hydra. 

“As you are well aware, my team and I conducted raids on six separate locations tied to the development and creation of anti magic devices. Each site was part of the manufacturing and distribution chain, from design, material supplies, assembly, testing, shipping and sales.”

“And Nick Fury?”

“Nick died at one of the sites as a result of the discharge of an energy weapon.”

Senator Grant makes a show of leafing through his own notepad. “Our sources indicate that Nick Fury was killed by the alien Loki. Whom we understand you have a personal relationship with.”

Steve smiles, “well, he is my husband.” He ignores the ripple of voices that goes through the room and instead keeps his attention focused on the three people in front of him.

The woman speaks up indignant, “Loki is an alien.”

Steve just smiles, “he’s a Prince of Asgard, one of the nine realms, of which Midgard, Earth, is also a part of.”

“So you are not _actually_ married,” She states rather emphatically.

He manages to suppress a put upon sigh, but he cannot stop from rolling his eyes. “ _Actually_ , we entered into a marriage verborir.”

The woman looks at him blankly and Steve grins in anticipation before continuing. “A binding; unbreakable, between mages.”

“Mages,” Senator Green repeats skeptically.

“Well, yeah. I mean, I’m still only learning and I’ll never have a fraction of the ability that Loki does, but I do alright.”

The woman doesn’t react and neither does Senator Grant beside her, but Senator Green is clearly shocked. “And how did you come to be a……..mage?” He asks excitedly.

Steve flashes a grin at the other two members, ignoring the question, “we were also married on Asgard by the All Father. He said it was to ensure our official standing within the Realms.” He gives a shrug of his shoulders.

Senator Green interjects, “so what does that make you, in regards to the royal family of Asgard?”

“Prince Consort,” Steve answers, cheeks pinking slightly.

There is a ripple of murmurs that travel around the room, before Senator Grant clears his throat, shooting a slight glare at the woman beside him, “lets return to the original topic.”

“By all means,” Steve responds, leaning back in his seat and crossing his arms over his chest.

“Can you confirm that the alien Loki was responsible for Nick Fury’s death?” 

“Loki did not kill him.” 

“How can you be certain? You yourself were not present at that facility.” A statement of fact, not a question.

Steve keeps his face neutral, “Loki and Nick Fury were at that facility with a small handpicked team. To my knowledge, none of you were at that facility either.” He leans forward again, eyes flicking between the woman and the man next to her. “The only other people in that building were Hydra scientists and soldiers. Which leads me to wonder where you came by your information.”

The shade of red that the committee members face turns is quite satisfying. 

“According to records that were released when SHIELD was destroyed, Loki killed approximately eighty people when he first arrived on this planet. What do you have to say about that?”

Steve does a passable job of looking innocently confused. “I was under the impression that I was summoned here to discuss the attack on several Hydra bases where dangerous energy weapons and anti magic devices were being made.” He pauses for effect, “am I mistaken?”

 

Tony nods at Steve as they pass each other in the small aisle. Immediately upon sitting down, Tony pulls out a tablet and presses a few buttons.

“You wanted to talk about Fury’s death?” He says, looking over the top of his tech glasses.

Before anyone can answer, Tony touches his tablet screen and with a swipe of his fingers across the screen and up into the air, everyone in the room can see what he is looking at.

“These are aerial images of the site Fury and Loki were at, before and after the raid. As you can see, the building was completely destroyed. Recordings from their teams communication devices indicate that they encountered several Hydra members. Statements from their team along with examination of Loki’s injuries after the raid indicate that they were attacked with an energy based weapon.” A series of documents flash across the image, too fast for any details to be made out.

He pauses and grins at the committee members as one by one, they try to speak into their microphones, only to find that they are inexplicably not working. 

“A copy of the transcripts have been sent to each of your inboxes, along with the results of the comprehensive medical examination of Loki’s injuries, independently verified of course, a full set of the team members statements and copies of the plans for energy weapons located at one of the other facilities. There is a lot of information and so I’ll give you some time to look it all over. A full set, along with all the data from each site has also been sent to General Watson.”

Tony looks at the committee as though a question has just occurred to him, “you do know who General Watson is, don’t you? He’s heading up the investigation on General Ross and the alleged misappropriation of military funds. Its interesting that the medical supply company in Florida was selling devices that suppress magic. And according to their records every invoice was signed personally by Ross. Now I can sit here and draw a line from those invoices all the way back to a California affiliate of Hammer Industries with flow charts and diagrams, but I’ll spare you the details and just send those documents over to you as well.”

The billionaire flashes a smile at the committee members. “I’ve got places to be and you have a lot of reading to do, so I’ll just sum this up.” He gestures at his tablet, shutting down the projection. “The World Security Counsel, specifically Alexander Piece, was after Loki from the start. They wanted to use him as a lab rat, find out the secrets of his magic, use that information for themselves, maybe even turn him into an operative. And isn’t it interesting that Peirce was part of Hydra?”

“We know Ross was after him too. Why else contract for anti magic devices, especially when he didn’t know Steve even had magic, until he got caught up in one meant for Loki.” Tony pauses, as though something else has just occurred to him, “Its odd that you two were the only ones here that weren’t surprised by that.” He points between Grant and Johns. 

“But that’s all changed hasn’t it? You aren’t really after Loki anymore because you want to dissect him. No, now your goal is to use him to get to Steve Rogers. The loss of every one of these facilities, every single raid that has been conducted, the years worth of planning, that has to be a huge set back and that’s your concern now. So now you’re focused on Steve Rogers, because he is and always has been, the biggest threat to Hydra.”

Tony looks over to General Watson who is seated behind and to the left of the committee members. The General leans over and speaks quietly to his aide. The aide nods and catches the eye of the guards posted near the exit. Tony gets up from the table, picks up his tablet and strides down the aisle towards the exit. Steve follows him out, to a chorus of shouts from Senators Johns and Grant.

General Watson stands and watches as the guards detain the two committee members before going after Steve and Tony. 

 

 


	49. Chapter 49

 

Chapter 49

 

“Captain Rogers!”

Steve can’t help the way his shoulders inch up closer to his ears. He slows his pace, but doesn’t turn, able to hear rushed footsteps in the hallway behind him.

“Captain Rogers!”

The blonde flicks his gaze to the side, catching Tony’s eye as he stops and turns back. “I’m no longer a Captain,” is his immediate reply. “General Ross saw to that.” He surprises himself with the bitterness of his tone.

“Actually, no, he did not,” General Watson answers.

Steve opens his mouth to respond just as down the hall, people begin to file out of the hearing room and the noise level increases dramatically. 

“If you’ll follow me, I have an office where we can talk.”

Even though he wants to get out of there, Steve nods, his curiosity winning out. A quick glance to Tony and all three men turn down a side hallway. The General leads them to a large office with a conference table that can easily seat ten. Taking a seat on one side, he indicates for Tony and Steve to sit opposite.

Stark doesn’t waste any time and jumps right into it, “Ross told the world that Steve was stripped of his rank, what gives?’

“General Ross made statements to a news outlet that were not authorized by the US Government.”

Steve stays quiet, content to allow this to play out. 

“There were no formal court marshal charges brought up against you, Captain Rogers. No military tribunal was ever convened. Your full military rank is in tact.”

Again it’s Tony who speaks, “and you didn’t notify Steve because……..” He makes a gesture with his hand towards the blonde.

“Because, the US Government has no knowledge of how to contact him to rectify the situation. 

“Has or had?” Steve asks, eyes narrowing.

“Has. Hence why your summons was delivered to a park.”

Steve doesn’t even try to hide the relief that he feels. Until Stark opens his mouth.

“You want us to believe that no one tried to find him? Captain America? The man who brought down SHIELD?”

General Watson taps his hand on the table lightly, “I didn’t say no one tried to find him.” He looks directly at Steve, “there are a few trusted individuals who have been monitoring your activities.”

“And we’re supposed to believe that the government just chose not to come knocking on his door?” Tony scoffs.

If he is irritated by Tony’s interruptions, the General doesn’t show it, but he does direct his response to Steve. “As I said, only a few people know of your location. And before you ask,” he shoots a look at Tony, “it suited our purpose to allow Captain Rogers to operate as he has been.”

“You mean, it suited your purpose to allow Steve to run around cleaning up your Hydra problem.”

General Watson sits back in his chair and shifts his eyes between Tony and Steve, “yes.”

Steve leans back in his chair as well and crosses his arms over his chest. He’s getting his questions answered and watching Tony’s indignation on his behalf is actually kind of amusing. 

Tony huffs, mouth dropping open and then snapping closed again. 

“Getting rid of SHIELD was a blow to Hydra, but we know that there are still agents entrenched in the government. My team has been tracking your activities, your raids have gone a long way to rooting out those agents, but there is still a lot to be done.” 

Steve just sits, waiting. He already knows what’s coming.

“I have a proposition for you Captain Rogers.”

 

Steve opens the front door and the first thing he hears is Eirik crying in his swing. 

“Loki?” He calls out as he sets his keys and a bag of take out food down, then pulls off his jacket, tossing it over the back of the couch. 

“Here!” Loki pokes his head in the living room and Steve can just see that he is holding their daughter before he disappears down the hallway again, calling back over his shoulder, “can you get him?”

Walking over to the swing, Steve reaches down and unbuckles the baby from the seat and lifts him up. “How’s my little man? Huh?” he coos.

“Were you good for daddy today?” he continues to babble to Eirik while he bounces lightly on his feet to soothe the baby.

The child quiets almost immediately and gazes up at Steve with his wide blue eyes. 

“How was your day?” Loki asks from behind him where he is now leaning on the wall watching the blonde.

Steve turns and grins at his husband, “interesting. I brought dinner.” He jerks his head towards the bag sitting on the table by the door.

Loki pushes off the wall and goes to take the food in to the kitchen where he immediately starts to unpack it. “If you change him, we can eat and then its bath time.”

“Bath time, huh?” Steve raises an eyebrow suggestively, causing Loki to bark out a laugh.

 

Dinner done, kids bathed and put to bed, Loki is sitting on the couch with Steve leaning back against him. Both men have stripped down to their underwear. Loki has both arms wrapped loosely around the blondes bare abdomen. The fingertips of his right hand trail lightly across the hard muscle and soft skin. He can feel the way Steve tenses and his breath stutters on each down stroke of his fingers and Loki can’t help but smile at the ease with which he can elicit a response from Steve. 

“Tony sent you the video of the hearing?”

“Yes, quite entertaining.”

“Turns out Ross never actually got my rank stripped from me.” 

“And how does that make you feel?” Loki murmurs as he splays his fingers out flat on Steve’s stomach, taking note of the way the blonde’s breath quickens ever so slightly. 

Steve doesn’t answer right away as he considers. “Not as good as I thought it would. I guess it just stopped being as important as it once was.”

Loki hums quietly. 

“General Watson made me an offer today. He has a small team that is trying to flush Hydra out.”

Loki starts to move his hand again, running his fingers from Steve’s chest, down to his thigh. 

“He wants us to keep doing what we’ve been doing. Working from the outside, while he works from the inside.”

Drawing his hand back up Steve’s thigh, tantalizingly close to the blondes cock, Loki can feel the shiver that travels up his spine. “And what does he have to offer you?” He asks, hand stroking up and down Steve’s body. 

“Information, leads…… a limited amount of support.“

“What is it that gives you pause?” 

“He wants the ability to send us after targets that he chooses sometimes, but in exchange we would have some protection since we were hired by the military.” Steve pauses, thinking. “I don’t want to get pulled in to another mess like SHIELD.”

Loki lays his palm flat on Steve’s stomach again. “Then you won’t. I think it would be best to sit down with Natasha and as much as I hate to say it, Stark, to go over everything.”

Steve shifts, trying to relieve some of the pressure on his cock where it is trapped inside his boxer briefs. “The General is supposed to send over a formal proposal tomorrow- ahhhh,” he hisses as Loki’s hand works beneath Steve’s waist band and wraps tightly around warm flesh. 

“Good. Tomorrow we will look it over, but for now…” He withdraws his hand and pushes at Steve’s underwear with both hands as the blonde lifts his hips just enough for them to be slid down and then dropped on the floor. 

Steve’s head drops heavily on Loki’s shoulder when the god grips his length in his right hand and begins to stroke him. Bringing his left hand lower, Loki cups his balls and gently fondles them. The blonde can’t help the low moan that issues from his throat. 

A soft chuckle is felt more than heard from Loki as he continues to work Steve’s flesh. “Are you close love?”

All Steve can do is squeeze his eyes shut and nod his head in response. “I want to hear you. Are you close?” Loki repeats as his grip loosens ever so slightly.

“Y-yes-yes,” Steve stammers and then shouts, “yes!” as the god’s hand squeezes and sends him over the edge. 

 

 


	50. Chapter 50

 

  
Chapter 50

The elevator dings and the doors open at the same time that Steve’s phone chimes an alert. Pulling it out of his jacket pocket he opens the message and is greeted with a selfie of Loki laying on the floor, on his side, with both twins sitting up in front of his chest. It’s adorable and Steve can’t help but grin as he steps out into the hallway of Stark Tower’s penthouse.

He makes his way over to the large sectional sofa where Tony is lounging with his feet up on the glass coffee table. 

“Hey Spangles! Grab a piece of couch!”

Steve glances around and is relieved and a little surprised to see that Tony does not appear to have a drink nearby. He chooses to sit in an overstuffed chair to Tony’s right and his mind immediately thinks about the different ways he and Loki could have fun in it. He runs his hand thoughtfully over the soft leather for a moment, then jerks his head up when Tony clears his throat.

“Remind me never to let you and Loki up here alone,” he quips and of course Steve immediately blushes.

“I don’t….. I wasn’t…..” He crosses his arms over his chest and tries to look serious, giving up on denying what was in his head.

Tony gestures to a large envelope sitting on the table next to his feet. “Pepper dropped off a counter proposal for the agreement for you and General Watson.”

Steve raises an eyebrow. He wasn’t aware Pepper had been around. She had been pretty scarce after she left Tony a while back, choosing to run the company from the California office. 

“You can look it over and see if you want anything changed,” Tony continues.

“I’ll take it home and look it over with Loki, but I’m sure its fine.” 

He opens his mouth to add something else, but stops when Pepper herself walks in the room.

“Hey Steve!” She greets cheerfully.

“Pepper. How have you been?”

“Good.” She looks at Tony and gives a smile before turning back to the blonde. “How have you been?”

“Good. Staying busy with the twins.”

Reaching up and pulling her hair into a pony tail, Pepper responds, “I bet. They’re adorable.” She grabs a dress jacket to match her skirt off the kitchen island and pulls it on. “Oh, when you see Loki, can you tell him I’ll be about 15 minutes late for lunch tomorrow? I have a meeting and I think its going to run long.” She walks over to Tony and leans down from behind the couch to pat him on the chest and place a kiss on his cheek. “Don’t forget we have dinner reservations at 7 tonight,” she tells the billionaire and then she breezes into the elevator with a last wave to Steve.

Steve blinks trying to process everything that just happened and to prioritize the questions he wants to ask. He settles on, “so you guys are back together?”

Tony lays a hand out flat and wiggles it back and forth. “We’re trying.”

“And that’s…….good, right?” Steve asks cautiously.

The wistful smile Tony throws over his shoulder towards the elevator is enough of an answer. 

“Ok. So whats this about Pepper having lunch with Loki?”

Picking up the TV remote, Tony shrugs a shoulder, “you hungry? I could go for lunch. Jarvis, lets order from that little taco place from last time.” He turns to Steve, “tacos okay with you?”

“Um, yeah, sure.”

 

Steve walks in the house and heads straight for the kitchen where he finds Loki feeding the twins. He is telling them a story and even though Steve is sure they are too young to understand what Loki is saying, they seem riveted. For just a moment Steve listens as well, taking note of the different tones and inflections Loki uses. The god is using his magic to cast small illusions to illustrate the story, but periodically scoops up a spoonful of baby food and feeds it to one of the twins, who automatically open their mouths to take the food, but keep their eyes on the illusions.

Not wanting to interrupt feeding and story time, Steve walks over to check on the pots that are simmering on the stove. Loki flashes him a brief smile as he walks by.

When the last bite of food is gone and the story is concluded, Loki quickly cleans up the minimal mess and takes first one baby and then the other and places them in a playpen to entertain themselves for a few minutes.

“How was your meeting with Stark?”

“You know that’s cheating right?” Steve asks instead of answering the question.

Loki lifts a hand to his chest, affronted look on his face, “what’s cheating?” But he can’t hold the expression for long and breaks out into a grin.

“I was wondering how you never get anything on you when you feed them, but I always seem to wind up with peas in my hair,” Steve remarks as he stirs the pasta sauce Loki started.

“But you look good with peas in your hair,” Loki teases as he reaches up to ruffle Steve’s blonde locks. 

Setting the spoon down on the counter, Steve reaches up and grabs Loki’s hand and then pulls him in for a kiss. He pulls away knowing now is not the time to get lost in each other. “Its still not fair. You’re so great with them.”

Loki rolls his eyes at the pout in his husbands voice, “need I remind you that they both want to sit on your lap when its time to wind down for bed?”

Steve only hums in response, he does cherish rocking the twins to sleep each night. 

“I brought home the agreement for General Watson. We can look it over tonight once the kids are down. I’d like your input.” He pauses before continuing, “Pepper said she may be late to lunch tomorrow.” There is a clear question in Steve’s voice.

With a smile, Loki dumps pasta into a pot of boiling water, “ok,” is all he responds as he gets dishes and silverware out. He doesn’t have to look at Steve to know he is curious and getting frustrated with his lack of response and it is really hard to hold back his smirk.

When he turns back around, Steve is leaning against the counter, arms folded across his chest, one eyebrow raised and Loki can’t help the laugh that bursts from his mouth. The corner of Steve’s mouth tugs up in response, even though he tries to stifle it

“When I was working with Stark while you were on Jotunheim, he may have mentioned Pepper a few times.” He serves two plates of food and passes one to Steve so they can sit and eat. “It is quite obvious that he loves her, he is just awful at dealing with emotions.”

“That’s an understatement,” Steve murmurs under his breath.

“When you asked Stark to have his attorney look over the agreement, I may have done…..some things….. to make sure the request made it in front of Pepper.”

“Nothing illegal, I hope,” Steve interjects.

Loki gives his best innocent look, “I would never….”

Its clear by the look on his face that Steve isn’t entirely satisfied so Loki adds, “you could ask Bruce and Jarvis, I suppose, if you want more details.”

“I might just do that.” Steve knows he won’t. He can draw his own conclusions. “I still don’t see how that leads to Pepper being back with Tony and you two having lunch.”

“Oh, that…” Loki waves a hand nonchalantly. “A few well placed calls to the legal department, couple of emails back and forth that she may or may not have been copied on,” he grins, “and she actually called me. Turns out she was flying in for a board meeting and so we met for lunch to go over the proposed agreement.”

Steve puts his fork down and just looks at his husband. He had no idea Loki was doing any of this. 

“She is extremely insightful. I can see why Stark gave her control of his company.” Loki lifts his own fork to his mouth, “I rather like her,” he adds before taking a bite.

“So you’ve met with her, how many times, to talk about the agreement?” Steve asks trying to get a clear picture in his head.

Loki chews thoughtfully for a moment before answering, “three times so far, but to be honest we have also been discussing ways to work on your public image.”

“Okay, just…um….why didn’t you tell me?”

For a moment Loki doesn’t know how to respond, feeling like he miss stepped some how. “Are you upset with me?” He asks cautiously.

“No! Not at all,” the blonde rushes to reassure. “I just, I don’t know…..” He trails off. 

Loki quirks his head to the side, “it is not as though I intended to not tell you.” He’s feeling defensive. “You do not tell me everything you and Bucky get up to on your playdates.”

“Hey, its okay, I’m not, I’m not upset……” he stops for a second, thinking. “Playdates? Bucky and I don’t have playdates!”

Holding a finger up to silence his husband, Loki pulls out his phone, dials a number and puts it on speaker. As soon as the call connects he asks, “are you free for lunch tomorrow?”

“Sure, Steve and Bucky having another playdate?” Natasha responds.

Steve huffs indignantly, “we don’t have playdates!” Which makes Natasha laugh. 

“Yeah, you keep telling yourself that Rogers. So lunch tomorrow?”

“Pepper and I are having lunch, I thought you might like to join us.”

“So we can all talk about Steve behind his back?” Steve huffs again at this. “Yeah, I’m in. Text me the time and place. Have fun on your playdate Steve.” She ends the call before he can respond.

“Not a playdate,” he grumbles.

 

Later that night, after dinner, after bath time, after the kids are asleep, Steve lays with his head on Loki’s bare chest, feeling sated and relaxed.

“You know I wasn’t upset earlier right?”

“About your playdate?” the god teases, causing Steve to bite his chest playfully. 

“No, about you secretly working to get Tony and Pepper back together.”

Loki runs a hand up and down Steve’s arm, raising goose flesh on his skin, “I simply afforded them a reason to speak to one another. Anything beyond that is up to them.”

Steve lifts his head to look into his husbands gorgeous green eyes, “you’re incredible. Did you know that?”

 

 


	51. Chapter 51

 

Chapter 51

 

Lunch with Pepper and Natasha was good, enjoyable even, although they both pester Loki into bringing the twins next time. They did manage to finalize the agreement for Steve and General Watson and now, three days later, Steve is sitting across from the General ready to sign the final document.

Steve will be treated as an independent contractor/ informant. His identity and that of anyone he works with, will be kept out of any and all government documents. General Watson can, at his discretion, provide Steve with intel on targets of interest. Steve, in turn, has final say if any such targets are to be engaged and in what manner. If Steve, or anyone on his team is captured, or implicated in any wrong doing, on foreign or domestic soil, the United States army will publically disavow any knowledge of their actions. Steve can request assistance from General Watson, in the form of personnel and equipment, before, during or after operations. General Watson can choose to provide such support or not. Both parties agree not to interfere with the operations of the other. The agreement can be terminated by either party without notice. 

There are other clauses and terms and overall, Steve is satisfied with the arrangement. He goes home with a large file of intel to look over. Dropping the file off and changing clothes, the blonde heads out to the restaurant where he is meeting Loki and the kids for dinner. He takes his bike since Loki has the car, Steve gave up on arguing about the god not having a valid license long ago, and lets his mind wander while he drives. 

 

He is still several blocks away when the sky lights up and the ground shakes with an explosion ahead. Traffic immediately screeches to a halt and it is only Steve’s quick reflexes that keep him from crashing into the car that skids through the intersection in front of him. His stomach twists into knots, knowing that his family is likely in danger. 

Speeding up, he weaves through the stopped cars and pedestrians who are now filling the roadway. Rounding the corner, his worst fears are confirmed when he can see that the explosion is centered on the restaurant they were meant to meet at. He ditches the bike and takes off at a run into the smoke and flames.

“Loki!” He shouts over the noise of people screaming and crying.

There are injured people staggering out of the restaurant and in the back ground, Steve can hear the sirens of incoming emergency vehicles. He stops to help a woman who is staggering under the weight of the unconscious teen age girl she is carrying out. 

Not seeing Loki outside, he ducks inside the broken doorway and is immediately enveloped in smoke. There are flames licking up the walls, flaring up when they touch fabric or paper. The flames spread across the ceiling, looking eerily like liquid running across glass. As the fire intensifies, sections of the suspended ceiling start to collapse, igniting tables and linens. There are only a few people still inside and Steve starts to check each one, ushering them out, even though he desperately wants to get to his family.

He carries an elderly man with an obviously broken leg outside and to the paramedics that have just arrived and starts to head back in. A police officer attempts to stop him, but Steve tries to push past him. 

Placing a hand on Steve’s arm, the officer tells him, “you can’t go in there. It’s too dangerous.”

“I have to get my to my family,” Steve says, shaking the hand off and starting for the door again. 

Several more officers and a couple of firemen have come closer and they move to block his path. He doesn’t have time for this, but knows fighting these men is not an option, especially when he glimpses the beams of several flashlights bobbing within the darkened interior of the building.

“Are those your men?” he asks, gesturing inside to the lights.

“No. They’re not.” The officer turns back to the assorted emergency personnel and hisses, “everybody get back! Move! Set up a perimeter.” 

Steve takes the momentary distraction and runs around the corner of the building, heading for what must be a back entrance.

The officer turns back, “where did he….? Dammit. Find him. The last thing we need is more civilians running around.”

One of the firemen speaks up, “you know who that was right?”

“No. Should I?”

“Steve Rogers. Captain America.”

The officer looks back at the building and frowns. The lights can’t be seen anymore, either moved on or obscured by the flames, he isn’t sure, but he has a scene to secure, casualties to see to and an unknown number of hostiles in the building.

“Pull back. Call it in to SWAT. He’s got a little time while we get set up.”

 

Steve leans against the wall, to the side of the door and pulls out his phone. He is hoping that maybe there will be a message from Loki telling him that he and the kids are safe, that they were running late. But there is nothing. He sends off a quick message to Sam Wilson, knowing that he doesn’t live too far away and hopefully can get there quickly. The reply comes fast, telling him that he is already geared up and headed that way. 

Steve debates for a moment. Does he wait for Sam or does he go in by himself. Its quiet inside and so either Loki is hiding with the kids or……. He can’t think about the alternative, but that is what spurs him into action. It only takes seconds to assess his situation; he’s in an alley, has no weapon and there is an unknown number of bad guys between him and his family.

Grabbing a lid from a metal trash can, he holds it in front of his body and quietly eases the door open. It’s dark, but the smoke isn’t as thick back here. Ducking down, he inches his way inside, eyes darting around looking for the telltale beams of flashlights, ears straining for any sounds. 

The room he is in looks to be mostly storage. There are some tables and stacks of chairs, cleaning supplies and shelves full of linens. Up ahead and through the next door way, he hears two voices. 

“Are you sure he’s in here?”

“Yeah. I watched him walk in pushing a stroller with Rogers’ brats.”

Steve’s fist clenches in anger, but he resists the urge to leap around the corner and bash the man’s brains in.

“Then where are they?” 

The blonde can hear the frustration in the man’s voice.

“I don’t know, but the stroller is in the private dining room. You’d think those kids would be screaming though.”

“Go back and check the offices again. Make sure Jonesy didn’t miss anything.”

As soon as Steve hears one set of footsteps retreat, he leaps around the corner, swinging his make shift shield out in front of his body. Its not as good as his real one and it dents when it impacts the mans face, but the sound is still satisfying as he watches the man crumple to the ground. Grabbing him by the ankles, Steve drags him back into the storage room. He starts to look for something to tie him up with when the back door swings open. 

Steve twists around with the lid in front of his body, ready to charge who ever steps through, but stops short when he see’s his friend.

“It’s me,” Sam whispers. “Where’s your shield?” he asks, eyeing the trash can lid.

“I don’t carry it with me all the time.” Steve tries not to let his irritation come through in his voice, grateful as he is for the back up.

“So what’s the situation?”

“I’ve got at least two more in here. Assume the same gear as this guy,” he kicks at the man on the ground. “No sign of Loki or……” He cuts off, raising his hand to his mouth to stifle the sob that wants to escape.

Sam steps forward and rests a hand on the blondes back, “hey. I’m sure they’re fine. Loki’s probably got them holed up somewhere, just waiting for you to barge in all hero like and rescue them.” When Steve only looks at him blankly, he adds, “we got this.”

 

They move through the huge kitchen and storage areas silently, checking every corner, every alcove. Sam looking for the attackers, Steve focused on finding his family. Steve is getting more and more agitated by the minute and when a gunman rounds the corner from the dining room, he grabs the man by his neck and drags him farther back into the kitchen. 

It is only Sam’s intervention that stops Steve from inflicting any permanent damage and truthfully, he isn’t entirely convinced that Steve would not have killed him. As it is, they won’t be getting any answers out of him for awhile. He knows there is at least one more person out in the dining room and as he is about to tell Steve that he should wait while Sam goes ahead, the back door to the restaurant opens and another team of eight start to file in. 

The leader holds up a fist, stopping the other men in their tracks once he see’s the tied up body in the storage area. Crouched behind a prep area with Sam, Steve can see the leader give the signal for his men to fan out. They are effectively trapped. 

He doesn’t have his shield, or any weapons. He knows Sam has his guns, but he doesn’t want to start a shootout, especially when he still doesn’t know where Loki and the kids are. 

Before he can formulate a plan, something catches his attention. To the left, along the wall, a set of six wire racks, filled with boxes and bins and cans of various sizes, shapes and colors. Except for the two in the middle. They are identical, every box, every bin, down to the direction the can labels face and the ears of corn sticking out from one of the boxes. 

He shifts and crawls forward to get a better look, just as the illusion fails, revealing a freezer door in place of one of the racks and all hell breaks loose.

 


	52. Chapter 52

 

Chapter 52

 

It’s chaos, yelling and shooting, all while Steve is trying to make his way to the freezer door before any of the gun men can get there. The first time he tried to make a dash out from behind the prep area, he was driven back by gun fire. Now he is sitting behind the counter, trying to control his breathing while he gingerly prods at his shattered collar bone. It was a lucky shot. And not a clean one.

Sam fires off several rounds from both his guns and then quickly checks Steve’s wound. Frowning, he shoots a glare at Steve before handing him a small caliber gun that he pulls from a concealed thigh holster. 

“Don’t do anything else stupid,” he hisses and then crawls to the other side of the prep station.

There is a lull in the shooting and in the reflections of the dishes stacked behind him, Sam can see that of the eight men that entered the restaurant, six are left standing. Two have moved along the wall and are within several feet of the freezer door. The other four have spread out taking up defensive positions.

Using hand signals he lets Steve know the relative positions of their assailants. Sam already knows its pointless to try and stop Steve from going for the freezer. He saw the illusion fall too. What he needs is a distraction to give the blonde a chance. And when there is a large crash from the dining room, as something large collapses from the fire, he knows he has it. 

More importantly, Steve knows. And he is moving before Sam can even turn back to look at him. Gun raised, Steve shoots the man closest to the freezer and then charges the second man when he raises his own weapon. Sam leaps up from behind the prep counter and opens fire with both guns. His first two shots hit their marks as gun men fall, but the last two men are able to take cover and return fire. 

Steve is grappling with his opponent, but manages to turn and use the man’s body to block the gunfire now being aimed at him. Flesh is not an effective shield and only the first two shots are stopped while the second two punch through the side of the now dead man and into Steve’s abdomen. The blonde staggers and drops the other man, sluggishly raising his hand to fire off a shot in retaliation. 

It goes wide, but Sam’s shot doesn’t, leaving only one gun man left, plus the unknown number from the dining room. 

There is another crash from the dining room and a cloud of smoke billows in, partially obscuring the glint of red and gold armor. The last gun man opens fire on Tony, who advances easily. Raising one hand, he disarms the man with a shot from his repulsor and the room goes quiet. 

Steve leans heavily against the freezer door, right arm hanging uselessly at his side, left hand clutching at his bleeding stomach. His shaking legs finally give out and he slides down to the ground, barely conscious. Tony’s face plate retracts and he is kneeling at Steve’s side in an instant, Sam not far behind. 

Sam carefully pulls at the fingers of Steve’s left hand, but stops as soon as he see’s the pink of bowel mixed in with the red of blood. 

“Where are Loki and the twins,” Tony asks Sam, voice subdued, as he watches the former military man quickly check the rest of Steve’s wounds.

“In there,” Sam responds tilting his head towards the door Steve is slumped against. 

“Okay. Jarvis, roll an ambulance, one of ours, lights out, back door. Prepare medical for four. Two adults, two pediatric. One adult with multiple gun shot wounds. Assume one adult and two pediatric hypothermic.”

“Yes Sir.” There is a pause, ”Sir, with current traffic and distance from the tower, ambulance eta is 1.27 hours.”

“How long with lights and sirens?”

“47 minutes.”

Sam is slowly moving Steve, trying to lay him flat on the ground. Tony looks around and finds a stack of table linens and brings over several pieces that Sam uses to cover the wound in Steve’s abdomen before placing the blonde’s hand back over it.

“Steve, I need you to focus for me. We’re going to move you, but you need to hold this in place.” He places his hand over the top of Steve’s, applying just a touch of pressure until he is sure the blonde understands.

“Sir,” Jarvis cuts in. “Half a mile to the east is a field large enough to accommodate a helicopter. I have taken the liberty of dispatching one. Dr. Banner is on board. Sending the location now.” 

To the AI, Tony responds, “got it.” He looks at Sam and takes hold of Steve’s legs so they can move him to the side out of the way of the freezer door. 

Once they have room, Tony pulls open the door. The freezer is large and at first he see’s nothing beyond the racks of food storage. In the far corner, sticking out from a second row of racks, he see’s the black heels of a pair of leather boots. 

He has only been in the freezer for moments and Tony can already feel the cold despite being in his suit. He lowers the face plate and adjusts the settings on the suit to warm it up, then steps around the corner.

Loki and Steve’s twins are sitting on the concrete floor wearing nothing more than cotton rompers. Between them sits several small stuffed toys that they are pushing between themselves contentedly. Tony knows all about the twins lineage. He has never personally seen their Jotun forms, but he has no doubt that is what he is seeing now. If the blue skin and prominent lighter ridges weren’t enough, the blood red eyes that Eirik turns on him make it clear. 

The baby gurgles, lifting up one of the toys, offering it to Tony. 

“Hey little guy,” he says, kneeling down and taking the offering, “thank you. How’s your daddy?” Tony reached over and touches Loki’s shoulder.

The god is laying partially turned on his side, facing away from the twins. Tony can tell he is not conscious. Gently Tony rolls Loki to his back and immediately wishes he hadn’t when Eiren starts to cry, followed by Eirik. The right side of Loki’s face is burned from below his eye, down his neck and across his chest. There is another burn covering most of his left hand and forearm.

 

Sam has lifted back the blood soaked linens covering Steve’s abdomen. Laying as he is, on his back, everything seems to be back more or less where it belongs, but he is sure that when they try to move Steve again they will have to be cautious of another prolapse. For now the blonde is drifting in and out of consciousness, but that changes in an instant with the first cry from his children.

Steve’s eyes fly open and his body jerks as he tries to sit up. Sam immediately pushes at his chest, trying to keep him down.

“Its okay! Steve! They’re fine!” Even injured, Steve is stronger than Sam and the former para rescue does the only thing he can think of to get control of Steve. He shifts his hand and squeezes down on the blonde's shattered collarbone, feeling the broken bones grind under his fingers. 

Steve’s body seizes in a rictus of pain before collapsing and Sam lets go reflexively. “Hey, sorry man. But you gotta stay with me.”

Louder he shouts, “Tony!” He doesn’t know what he expects the billionaire to do. For all he knows, the man is dealing with an even worse situation in the freezer.

 

“Stay right here kiddo’s. I’m gonna go check on your dad.” He stands and then adds, “your other dad,” to clarify.

He steps away and immediately the kids start to cry louder, frightened now, by the tension they can sense around them.

 

“Shit!” 

Steve has started to struggle again with the increased distress of his twins. When Tony steps into sight he keeps pushing the blonde down, but immediately asks, “are they........?” Trying to be vague in case the answer is negative in any way.

To his great relief, Tony tells him the twins are fine, but Sam can see he is holding something back. He chooses not to ask about Loki, focusing instead on trying to keep his friend down. “Bring them out here so he can see them.”

Steve is near delirious with pain and confusion, but when Tony steps out with the still blue twins and sets them down beside him, the blonde calms almost immediately, as do the babies themselves. 

“Tony?” A very familiar voice calls out from the alley behind the building.

“Bruce! In here!” Tony yells back, relieved.

Bruce enters the kitchen wearing only the special stretchy pants that Tony made to withstand his transformation into the Hulk. He takes a moment to look over the scene and then kneels beside Steve.

“What do we have?” He asks Sam, knowing he will get a precise run down of the important information from one medical personnel to another. He listens and gently touches Steve’s abdomen when he looks at the wound. 

“Sam, go check on Loki. Tony, find me a roll of plastic wrap,” he directs.

 

Inside the freezer, Sam checks Loki’s wounds and decides he can risk carrying him, so he scoops the god up in his arms, surprised at how much the slim man weighs and takes him out to the kitchen. He emerges just as Tony is handing a large roll of plastic wrap to Bruce.

Laying Loki on the ground out of the way, he helps Bruce cut away what is left of Steve’s shirt and wrap his abdomen tightly in the plastic. It’s not pretty, but it should be enough to allow them to get the family out of there. 

After a brief debate, they decide that Sam will fly Loki to the waiting helicopter and Tony will take Steve since he will have the best chance of holding him if Steve starts to struggle mid flight. Out in the alley, Bruce surrenders to the Hulk and holds out his large hands to cradle the small twins to his chest before bounding away. 

When Tony touches down at the helicopter with a combative Steve in his arms, he finds Sam already there buckling Loki to a gurney. He stops and goes to help Tony with Steve, but they both struggle to get him under control while trying not to injure him further. When Hulk lands heavily thirty feet away, he approaches and gingerly lets Sam take the children before relinquishing control, sinking down to his knees.

“Steve. Hey. Look! Here they are. See. And Loki’s right over there.” Sam tilts his head in the gods direction and watches as Steve’s eyes focus. His gaze flits over both twins before drifting to the side to where Loki it laying. He sucks in a rattling breath and then falls still. 

Bruce is exhausted from his transformation, but he knows now is not the time to rest. “Let’s get them loaded up and to the Tower.”

 


	53. Chapter 53

 

Chapter 53

 

As soon as the helicopter sets down on the roof of Stark Tower, Sam is out, helping to unload both gurney’s. He and Bruce push them directly into the waiting elevator, which immediately descends to the basement medical level.

It takes Tony a little longer to get out, as he is wrangling Steve and Loki’s twins. He is left standing awkwardly with one twin on each hip, waiting for the elevator to come back up. Luckily the children seem content to play with the small toys he remembered to grab off the freezer floor. 

Once the elevator arrives, Tony steps in and then realizes he has no idea where he should go with them. Taking them to the daycare set up on the second floor for Stark Industries employees is out of the question, as is his lab. The penthouse is not baby proofed and neither are the medical levels. 

“Sir, I have taken the liberty of calling Betsy Braddock. She will be here within the hour to assist.” Tony heaves a sigh of relief as the elevator doors close and the car starts to descend, but only as far as the penthouse.

When the doors open, Pepper is standing there, waiting to take one of the babies. 

“I thought you had meetings all day?” Tony asks, even though he is incredibly grateful for the help.

Grinning over her shoulder as she walks away cooing at Eirik she responds, “I cleared my afternoon schedule. Figured you could use a hand with these two.”

“Don’t know what I would do without you, Pep.”

“Well, for starters you would be changing this little guys diaper on your own.”

“….What?”

“His diaper. He needs to be changed. And probably fed.” She grabs a throw off the top of the couch and lays it out on the floor before setting the baby down. “Happy should be up with a few things from the daycare to get us by and then he’s going out to pick up supplies.”

“Yeah, supplies that’s good.”

 

Beyond the glass window that separates the room from the hallway, Sam can see the door burst open and the medical staff start to stream in. Several come into the room where he is waiting with Loki, who is still unconscious, while the rest stream into Steve’s room.

Loki’s clothes, already partially destroyed in the fire, are cut off and the Doctor starts to look over the god’s wounds. He dictates details on the severity of the burns to one of the nurses, who diligently writes it all down. 

“I want a full set of scans. We may be dealing with head trauma, based on the loss of consciousness and lets get going on treating the hypothermia,” the Doctor orders. He turns to another nurse, “call Dr. Carson. He’s a burn specialist.”

Sam stays back out of the way while a portable scanner is set up in the room. The images come up in real time and Sam can’t help but be impressed with the sophistication of Stark’s equipment. 

“Looks like we have a skull fracture and……..” the Doctor pauses as he looks over the rest of the images as they come up, “that looks like it.”

He turns to Sam, “I don’t see any other internal injuries or fractures. So that’s good. We will need to get the swelling down in his brain. Once Dr. Carson gets a chance to look over his burns, we should be able to work up a plan. I’m not going to lie, his recovery will be long and quite painful. He’s probably looking at skin grafts and a lot of physical therapy. Even with that, he may not regain full use of his arm.”

And now Sam has a dilemma, does he tell the Doctor who Loki is and that he is not human? Or does he wait? Figuring they will find out sooner or later Sam decides to tell the Doctor, who listens intently and then orders the nurse to carefully document everything so they can see any signs of Loki’s advanced healing kicking in.

 

Bruce steps back out of the way when the medical team swarms in so they can get a look at Steve’s wounds. The nurses make short work of cutting away what remains of Steve’s clothes. And then they carefully cut the plastic wrap from around his torso. 

With the plastic wrap cut away, Bruce can finally get a good look at Steve’s wound. Its bad. Much worse than his initial look at the restaurant indicated. His abdomen is swollen and the flesh is an angry red. The edges have started turning black and there are thin purple, spidery lines spreading out towards his sides. 

The blonde weakly lifts a hand to push at where the Doctor is probing at his shattered collar bone. He is barely coherent, but Bruce can see his mouth moving. Stepping close to his head, Bruce leans in, trying to stay out of the Doctor’s way, until he can finally make out what Steve is saying. 

Resting a hand on Steve’s uninjured shoulder, Bruce tells him, “they’re fine Steve.”

His eyes are pleading as he turns them towards Bruce. “I promise. They’re fine. Loki’s next door. Sam’s with him right now. Eirik and Eiren are with Tony.”

His reassurances don’t seem to be helping and so he speaks up, “Jarvis, can you tell me where the twins are?”

“Ms. Potts is currently playing with them on the penthouse level. Ms. Braddock in en route. Sir is in the elevator and will arrive on the medical level in approximately 27 seconds.”

Steve’s lips move again and even though no sound comes out, Bruce knows what he is asking. 

“Jarvis, what is Loki’s condition?”

“Mr. Rogers appears to have second and third degree burns over 20% of his body. Mostly centered on his face, neck, chest and left arm. He is currently stable, but unconscious. Sir has a burn specialist on call and he should arrive within 15 minutes.”

Out in the hallway Bruce can see that Tony has arrived and he steps out to speak with him after quietly reassuring Steve that he will be right back. 

“How are they?” Tony asks as soon as the door to Steve’s room closes behind him.

Bruce relays everything he knows to the billionaire, which honestly isn’t much. A flurry of movement beyond the glass draws both men’s attention back to Steve who is pushing away the nurse trying to start an IV line. A male nurse holds Steve’s arm so she can try again and this time Steve jerks out of the man’s grip and tries to sit up. 

One of the staff opens the door, “Dr. Banner, we could use your help. We need to keep him calm so we can start the IV.”

“Here,” Tony types some commands on the tablet he brought down with him and hands it to Bruce, “take this.”

The screen shows a live feed of the twins playing with their stuffed toys on the floor of the penthouse. Bruce accepts it gratefully and takes it right over to Steve, standing just by his head, as he did previously. 

“Hey, take a look.” Bruce angles the small screen so Steve can see it. The blonde immediately begins to relax, laying back on the bed, as he watches his children.

Seeing her chance, the nurse steps back up and deftly places the IV line. Bruce watches her and only now realizes that the spidery lines have moved up Steve’s torso and are now arching out towards his shoulders and up his neck. He can hear the air as it wheezes in and out of Steve’s lungs. Bruce gives a worried glance to the Doctor and then looks back at Steve and smiles.

“They’re pretty cute. If Tony’s not careful, Pepper is going to want a baby after spending time with Eirik and Eiren.” He tries to joke, tries to keep Steve focused on the screen and not on what the medical team is doing. 

Bruce can almost watch the lines as they creep up Steve’s neck and start to spread across his cheeks. He can see the way Steve’s hands are both gripping the sheet on the bed. On the screen Eiren picks up one of the toys, a small dog, and hands it to her brother.

“Do you think they have magic?” Bruce knows Steve can’t really answer, but he asks anyway, just so he can keep Steve’s attention on the screen. 

Steve’s eyes squeeze shut and Bruce can see his throat bob as he swallows. The blonde gives a barely perceptible nod as a single tear runs down the side of his face. 

Bruce watches as Eirik starts to hand the toy back, but stops with his arm held out in front of him. The infant tilts his head to one side and looks over at Eiren with his wide blue eyes, so much like Steve’s. Eiren’s own eyes widen as tears start to run down her face. She doesn’t make a sound. Neither child does. 

The only sounds are the rattle and wheeze of Steve’s labored breathing, the beeping of the medical equipment and the urgent murmurs of the Doctor and nurses. Then there is nothing except the shriek of alarms as Bruce is practically shoved out the door. And all he can do is watch helplessly as the medical team tries to bring Steve back. 

 

 


	54. Chapter 54

 

Chapter 54

 

Sam practically jumps back when Loki surges up from the bed without warning.

“Steve!” the god gasps.

“Hey, whoa, calm down,” Sam raises his hands in a placating gesture.

Loki looks at him briefly before his eyes start to flick around the room and then down at his own body. With a sharp tug, he yanks out the IV line in his arm and swings his feet over the side of the bed. Sam can see the burned flesh on his left arm as it cracks and starts to ooze. 

“You need to lay down.” Sam tries to use his most soothing voice, the one he reserves for soldiers in the throws of a flashback or PTSD episode. 

Before he can say anything else the shrill sound of alarms start to go off in the room next door. That’s all it takes and Loki lurches unsteadily to his feet. Sam starts to reach for him, but stops short when Loki raises his hands defensively in front of his body. He doesn’t truly believe that Loki would intentionally hurt him, but he opts to stay back, just in case. 

When Loki strides, albeit a little wobbly out of the room, Sam takes a moment to open a large supply cabinet and grab a hospital gown, before following him out. In the hallway the sound of alarms is louder and are mixed with shouted orders from Steve’s doctor. 

Loki’s own doctor and nurse rush into the hallway from the elevator, but a quick shake of Tony’s head, keeps them back as the god steps to the window looking into Steve’s room. Sam takes the opportunity to drape the hospital gown over Loki’s shoulders.

“What are they doing to him?” the god asks as he watches the nurses inserting a long tube down the blonde’s throat, while the doctor presses buttons on a machine that has been wheeled over to the bedside.

Bruce steps to the god’s side, “he isn’t breathing,” he pauses and swallows down the lump in his throat, “and his heart isn’t beating. They’re trying to bring him back.”

Loki tugs the gown around his body and only flinches a little when Steve’s body convulses after the doctor places two rectangular devices on his chest. 

“They’re shocking him, to try and restart his heart,” Bruce explains. 

There is no reaction from the god on the second, third and fourth shocks and only a slight twitch of his hand when the alarm tone suddenly stops and is replaced by the beeping of Steve’s heart monitor. It isn’t the steady rhythm that it should be, but its something and Loki is opening the door to the room as soon as he hears it. 

To his credit, the doctor makes no effort to ask Loki to leave and the god is grateful that he will not have to deal with that. 

“Who was with him when he was brought in?” he questions.

“Dr. Banner brought him in.”

Loki turns back to the window and gestures for Bruce to come in. When he turns back, the doctor continues, “Captain Rogers was shot multiple times. The bullets fragmented and appear to have been coated in some type of fast acting poison. We don’t know what it is and do not know how to counter act it. We’ve done what we can for now, but he isn’t breathing on his own and we don’t know how long we can keep his heart beating. I’m afraid it doesn’t look like he has much time.”

When Loki doesn’t respond, the doctor looks to Bruce who tells him, “thank you.”

“We’ll leave you alone. He’s been given a large does of morphine, so he shouldn’t feel any pain.” And with that, the entire medical staff files quietly out of the room.

“Jarvis, can you seal off the room, stop any audio or video feeds and give us some privacy?”

The AI doesn’t respond, but the window turns opaque and the door lock clicks into place, letting Bruce know his orders have been carried out. 

Reaching out, Loki takes Steve’s hand in both his own. He lowers his head and closes his eyes as his hands start to glow. The glow slowly spreads up Steve’s arm and begins to creep across his chest, “Is there anything else you can tell me?” His voice is soft, almost a whisper.

“Not…..no…..there isn’t.” Bruce looks at the god, “can you heal him?”

The glow begins to recede back towards Loki’s hands, and the god makes a choked off noise, “I can feel the poison, the wrongness in his body, but I am unable to fight it. If I were uninjured, but my body is using much of my power to keep me conscious.”

He pauses, hesitant to say anything more, but speaks anyway, “I can draw it out of him. But I need a vessel in which to place it.”

Bruce perks up, “a vessel? Sure, what kind of vessel?” He is already looking around the room.

“Another person. I can draw it out and into another. I would take it myself but there is no way to guarantee I can get it all before it kills me, in my current state…..” he trails off, but Bruce doesn’t need him to continue.

It only takes him seconds to come to a decision. “Use me.”

Loki looks up at him sharply, “what?”

“Use me. Loki if you can save Steve then you need to do it.”

“I have already been the cause of death for one of his friends, I will not be responsible for another,” the god hisses.

“You won’t be. At least, I don’t think…..” Bruce pleads, “Look, before, when this first happened to me, I got real low and I tried to end it, tried to put a bullet in my brain. It didn’t work, I woke up and realized the other guy had just spit it out.”

The thoughtful look on the gods face causes Bruce to keep talking, “I can do this, the other guy can do this!”

“And if you are wrong? What then Banner?”

“Then at least I tried. And if I die, then I died trying to save a friend. No more and no less than Steve would do for any of us.”

On the monitor, Bruce can see that Steve’s heart beat is becoming more erratic, “Loki, we don’t have any more time.” He can see the god wavering and so he gives the final push, “you don’t want your kids to grow up without him do you? You can’t do that to them, when you have a chance to stop it.”

He knows it’s a low blow, but he cannot regret it, will not regret it. And when Loki grasps on to Steve’s hand with his left and reaches out for Bruce with his right, the scientist knows he has won. 

At first, he doesn’t notice anything as he watches Loki’s hand glowing around Steve’s, but then he can feel a burning sensation traveling up his arm, from the place where Loki is griping him. It hurts, it burns and Bruce can feel the Hulk start to rage against the pain. 

He pleads in his head for the Hulk to hold on, just hold back. It won’t do to let him out before Loki can transfer all the poison and he doubts in the gods weakened state, that he would be able to hold on to him if the Hulk took over. 

The scientific part of him wants to watch as the purple lines recede from Steve’s body, drawing up his arm to Loki’s hand, but the man in him is fighting the need to writhe on the floor from the unbearable pain. 

Out in the hallway, Tony and Sam are looking at each other in confusion, not able to see or hear what is happening in the room. “Jarvis, what’s going on in there?”

“I am sorry sir, but Dr. Banner has enacted privacy protocols.” 

Out of the corner of his eye, Loki can see the way Bruce’s skin seems to ripple as the Hulk tries to take control. The scientist screams as he feels the poison rush through his system. 

Out in the hall, Tony yells, “Jarvis, emergency override privacy protocols!”

The door lock clicks and Tony jerks open the door, but stops short when Bruce turns, face shaded green and yells, “stay back!” 

He lets out a scream of anguish that morphs into a roar as the Hulk finally fully emerges. Stumbling back, Hulk smashes into a storage cabinet as Loki collapses to the ground. Tony lifts a hand towards Hulk and tries to look as non threatening as possible.

“Hey big guy. It’s okay. Why don’t you let Bruce come back out?”

The Hulk drops to his knees, causing everything in the room to rattle and roars again, head thrown back. He slams his head into the partially destroyed cabinet. With another roar, he braces his hands on the floor and for the first time Tony can see purple lines pulsing under the green skin. With each passing second, the lines expand further across Hulk’s body.

A large green hand reaches up and grabs at a wall mounted sink. It gives with no resistance and is thrown at the glass window looking out into the hallway. Tony catches a glimpse of Sam herding the stunned doctors and nurses to the elevator. Unsurprisingly, he stays behind when the elevator doors close. 

“Jarvis! Shut the water off to this floor!” Tony shouts and the AI complies immediately, stopping the water from gushing out of the broken pipes.

Dropping to his hands and knees again, Hulk smashes a fist into the floor before throwing his body against the already destroyed cabinet. The behemoth sinks further down and Tony can hear his labored breathing. He huffs out several more breaths and then stills, shrinking back until only the naked, unconscious form of Bruce Banner is left. 

It’s quiet. So terribly quiet after all of that and Tony can only look around in shock. It’s the sound of feet crunching on glass that brings him around. 

“What the hell just happened?” Sam asks as he gingerly steps over to Loki and checks his pulse. 

It is thready and week, but there. Miraculously, the equipment monitoring Steve is still in tact and so Sam is able to see that while the blonde is not breathing on his own, his heart seems to be beating stronger and with a regular rhythm. He also notes the lack of purple lines on his skin.

“What ever happened, we need to get the doctors back in here and get these guys set up in new rooms.”

 

 


	55. Chapter 55

 

Chapter 55

 

Its calm. Finally. The only sound coming from the low beeping of monitors and hushed voices.

“How are they doing?” Sam asks as he offers Tony a fresh cup of coffee. When he doesn’t take it and instead steps closer to look at the display for Steve’s heart monitor, Sam sets the cup down on a counter.

“Better. Bruce is pretty wiped out, but he’ll be up and around in no time.” Tony walks over and picks up the mug, taking a slow sip. Sam smiles wryly as he watches. “Doctor said they should be able to take out Steve’s breathing tube later today. Now that the poison’s out, he should heal fairly quickly.” 

“That’s good.” Sam is relieved, but he can hear the wrongness in Tony’s voice and he knows he will have to draw it out of him one sentence at a time to figure out just what is bothering him. 

“Loki woke up briefly. Had him moved in here so he could be closer to Steve. Seemed to help. I guess.” Tony sets his coffee back down on the counter and all but collapses into a chair at the end of Steve’s bed. “How are the kids?”

“Betsy’s got them. They’ve calmed down, which is good.” Sam shifts, setting his own, nearly empty cup down. “I thought about bringing them down, but I’ll wait until one of them,” he gestures to Steve and Loki in their respective beds, “is awake enough to…….” He trails off and then starts again, “I don’t want to scare them.” His eyes are focused on Loki, more specifically, on the burns on his face.

“No, I guess you wouldn’t.” Tony agrees.

Sam turns to him with a soft smile, “why don’t you take a break, go spend some time with Pepper, maybe get some rest. I’ll stay here and keep and eye on things and make sure these two don’t get into any more trouble on their own.” He tries to joke. It falls flat, but Tony gives a wan smile anyway before he gets up and starts to turn away.

“Hey, are you okay?” Sam asks, hoping that Tony will open up to him about what’s on his mind. “You know I’m here, if you want to talk. I’ve been told I’m pretty good at listening.”

“There’s a couple of things in my workshop that I need to finish up, but let Jarvis know if you need anything,” Tony replies, completely ignoring the offer.

Sam watches Tony leave and then jumps at the voice coming from behind him.

“You should go rest as well.”

“Dammit Loki, you scared the hell oughta me.” He shakes his head with a grin. “How long were you awake anyway?”

The god pulls himself up into a seated position with the aid of his bed rail. “Long enough to know you think I may scare my kids.”

From his tone alone, Sam can’t tell if Loki is joking or actually offended. Going for the safest course, Sam changes the subject. “How are you feeling?”

Loki lifts his burned left hand in front of his face and looks it over. The charred skin glows faintly at the edges and Sam can almost swear there is new pink skin at the edges of the burns. 

“Did you just…..” He begins.

The shrug Loki gives is noncommittal, “I can heal myself, but it will not be quick. At least not until I have rested adequately…… and even then….. I think for the time being…..” 

Sam waits, not wanting to interrupt the god while he gathers his thoughts. 

“How does Bruce fair?”

“Tony said he’s fine, resting.”

It is several long minutes of silence as Loki picks at the edges of his blanket before Sam speaks again.

“You did the right thing Loki.”

Loki’s head jerks up, the look on his face venomous. “You can’t know that. What if he had been wrong and Hulk wasn’t able to fight off the poison? I would have been responsible for not only Nick Fury’s death, but also Bruce’s.”

“Did you respect Nick?” Sam asks.

With a sigh Loki responds, “we may not have always agreed on things, but yes I did respect him.”

“Then allow him the dignity of his choice.”

“I do not think it was his choice to die, any more than it was Bruce’s,” Loki snaps.

“I’m sure you’re right about that. But it was Nick’s choice to save you, just as it was Bruce’s to save Steve. Don’t dishonor their decisions, just because you may have chosen differently. I can tell you with certainty that both of them knew exactly what they were doing.”

 

Just a few short hours later, the doctor and nurses have come in to remove Steve’s breathing tube, at Loki’s insistence, after watching the blonde struggle towards consciousness. The fear in his eyes, when he first snapped them open, startled Loki to his feet uttering nonsensical reassurances to his beloved husband as he leaned over the bed, his own injuries forgotten.

And now he watches the doctor as he pulls the long tube out of Steve’s airway as the blonde coughs. After ensuring that Steve is stable, the doctors and nurses file back out. Immediately, he opens his mouth to speak, but all that comes out is a pained whisper that the god cannot make out. 

“I’m here love,” Loki reassures, stepping close and taking Steve’s hand in his. 

The blonde can’t quite suppress the wince when he see’s the burns on Loki’s face. 

“It looks worse than it is,” he tries to reassure, apparently ineffectually as the corners of Steve’s mouth turn down.

“I will heal. With enough rest and time.”

At this, Steve tries to shift on his bed and pulls on Loki’s hand to bring the god closer, an invitation to lay down next to him.

Loki's eyes grow wide in mock surprise, “Steve! I don’t think either one of us is in any condition for that!”

Steve rolls his eyes dramatically and pulls harder on Loki’s hand. This time, the god relents without a struggle. He positions himself on his uninjured side and smiles, happy to be close to his husband after everything that has happened. 

“Twins?” Steve whispers just loud enough for Loki to hear.

“Upstairs with Betsy and Pepper. I imagine they are quite content.” Loki turns his gaze up, “Jarvis what are Eiren and Eirik doing?”

“Eiren is napping and Ms. Braddock is currently rocking Eirik.”

“Thank you Jarvis. Please inform everyone that Steve is awake and doing well and that we will be resting for now and wish not to be disturbed.”

“Of course, Mr. Rogers,” the AI responds. 

“And can you let Betsy know she can bring the kids down in a couple of hours?”

“Will there be anything else?”

Loki looks at Steve, who shakes his head, “just dim the lights a little.” As soon as the words are out of his mouth the lighting level lowers. “Thank you Jarvis.”

 

Sam knows he should feel bad, but he tries not to as Pepper opens the door to Tony’s lab and leads him in. She breezes over to the billionaire, who is sitting at a workstation soldering together some components for who knows what. 

“I told Sam you would give him a tour of your lab,” she tells him before planting a quick kiss on his cheek and squeezing his shoulders. 

And then she is gone, just as quickly as she arrived, leaving Sam standing awkwardly in the doorway. He was already planning on trying to talk to Tony, but when Pepper approached him and told him she was concerned, he decided sooner would be better than later.

“She send you up here to talk to me? Or was this all your idea?” Tony asks, not looking up from what he is working on.

“I’m just here to look around,” Sam denies and then adds, “but, if you wanted to talk…..” He shrugs his shoulders.

Seemingly satisfied with what he has done, Tony sets down the items he was working with and stands, stretching his back in the process. 

“Right, so, since you’re here.” He heads over to a large clear panel suspended on either side by metal framing. Tapping on the screen a few times, he brings up an image of Sam’s wings.

“I was looking over the design for your wings. And while its serviceable, I could make it great.” Another few touches, brings up a second image beside the first. “Take a look,” he invites.

Sam steps up to the screen and looks at the new design while Tony touches and manipulates the image to show different components. With a swipe of his hand, the image appears as a three dimensional, life sized, holographic model. 

With a few hand gestures, Tony turns the model and demonstrates the new features he has planned.

“Those Kids are pretty cute,” he says suddenly, keeping his eyes fixated on the display. “Their lucky to have both of their dads. And Steve and Loki are good parents.”

 _Ah!_ Sam thinks, but doesn’t respond. He knows from experience that sometimes its less about talking to someone about their issues and more about listening, as they work through it on their own. 

“Sucks that something could happen to them and then those kids would be left alone. That can mess a kid up.”

Continuing to manipulate the image, Tony separates the wing pack from the holographic version of Sam.

“I think Pepper may want kids. But I can't do that. I can't bring a kid into the world and not know if I can be there for them. And with this,” he gestures to the row of iron man suits behind him, all in various states of construction and repair, “its not like there is a Sam Wilson to take over being Iron Man for me.”

And now Sam is starting to understand. But he thinks he’s pushed enough for now and decides to steer the conversation away. “This design looks amazing. Can you do it?” He knows full well that Tony can, but asks anyway just to give the man something positive.

Tony swipes his hand in front of the image and it disappears. “Almost done. Should be ready for you to try out in a couple of days.”

 

 


	56. Chapter 56

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay in posting. I hope everyone had a great Christmas holiday and wish everyone a wonderful new year. Fingers crossed I will have a story to post for new year's eve for this series as well.

 

Chapter 56

 

Loki and Steve have been staying in a guest suite in Stark Tower while they heal. The god wants to go home, but he also wants Steve close to the Doctors just in case. Eiren giggles as she reaches out to touch the illusion of a cat Loki has cast to entertain the kids while Steve sleeps on the bed beside him. 

He grins at his daughter and makes the cat jump after a toy mouse. Both toddlers laugh and Steve stirs slightly in his sleep. Briefly, Loki debates taking them out to the living area of the guest suite, but ultimately decides he would rather stay close. It’s not that Steve needs him, the blonde seems to be healing nicely from the poisoning and his broken collar bone. Its just that Loki wants to keep his little family together like this for a little while longer.

When Steve’s eyes flutter open and he gives Loki a sleepy smile, the gods heart skips a beat. And when Steve sits up and scoots closer, his stomach does a little flip. The blondes eyes narrow and a frown starts to creep over his features as he looks over Loki’s burned skin.

“I’m fine,” Loki tells him, before Steve can even ask. “A few more days and I should be good as new.”

He can tell Steve is not completely satisfied by his response, so he gestures to the twins to draw his attention away. It works, even if Steve purses his lips together, very aware of the way Loki is trying to distract him.

“Hey,” the blonde says as he takes Eiren’s hand and gives it a little squeeze before ruffling Eirik’s hair. 

The twins’ attention is still focused on the cat and so they barely react to their father’s touch. But when the cat jumps on Steve and perches itself on his shoulder, both children laugh and try to scoot forward to get in his lap.

Steve laughs and happily scoops both of them up into his arms. “If you’re not careful, they’re going to want a real cat,” he teases. 

Loki just grins at his husband, “are you hungry love?”

“Starving,” Steve responds in between making silly faces at the twins.

“Then we shall eat and after, get you in the shower.”

With a mischievous smile Steve responds, “you’ll be joining me then?” 

“If you desire it,” Loki purrs.

“You know I do.” Steve ducks his head as a blush starts to spread across his cheeks. “Just take it easy on me, still healing remember?”

 

“What’s going on?” Steve asks as he drops down on the couch next to Loki.

The god’s expression quickly changes from the slight frown he had been wearing to a smile that is too bright to be anything but false. When he looks at Steve and see’s the unamused look on his face, Loki drops the smile and leans his head down to rest on the blonde’s shoulder.

“I miss our home,” he says before quickly adding, “Tony has been most generous, allowing us to stay, but…. And I know it is important for you to be here while you heal...its just.....”

Steve lifts his hand and rubs the back of his neck, “to be honest, I’m ready to go home too. I just want to make sure _you’re_ healed up enough, before we go. And…. Since I’m being honest, there is a part of me that is nervous about taking Eirik and Eiren out again.”

Loki nods, “I understand that.”

Pulling back, Steve looks pleadingly at his husband, “I mean it Loki. I don’t think I’ve ever been that scared in my life. The thought of losing the three of you, its too much.”

“I don’t think I can ever make it up to you. I put our children at risk. Everything I have done to bring you into the public eye…. I have been focused on your reputation, on not letting my presence in your life detract from your good name. I wanted to make sure you had the public’s support when they tried to go after you. And I know it's selfish, but it was nice, not having to hide who we are.... I never thought they would be so despicable as to hurt children.”

Steve wraps his arm around Loki and pulls him close so the god is resting his head on Steve’s broad chest. “I’ve been fighting Hydra for so long. Nothing they do should surprise me anymore. This just makes me more determined to end them once and for all.”

 

“Captain Rogers, Sir would like to see you and Mr. Rogers in his lab, when you have a moment,” Jarvis announces while Steve and Loki are feeding the twins.

Without looking up, Steve responds, “thank you Jarvis. Please tell him we will be up in about twenty minutes and that we will have Eiren and Eirik with us.”

“What do you think that’s about?” Loki asks.

Steve shrugs his shoulder and is pleasantly surprised that the action is relatively painless. “Not sure. But he didn’t seem happy earlier when I told him we’re going home in the morning. He offered to let us move into the tower permanently.”

“Would you want that?” Loki’s voice is cautious, unsure. 

“Not unless you changed your mind. Otherwise, I’m ready to go home.”

 

It takes them closer to thirty minutes to get up to the lab. Both kids needed to be washed up and changed. The counters and floors had to be wiped and Steve had to change his shirt due to the baby food stains on it. Loki of course, much to Steve’s chagrin, remained food free, as usual.

Surprisingly, Tony was much more relaxed about having the children in his lab than either Loki or Steve anticipated. They expected him to be antsy and nervous with them around his delicate equipment and when Loki mentioned it to Tony, he responded that the lab is somewhat baby proofed already because of Dum E. 

The one armed robot pokes its head up, tilted to the side, facing Tony, at the mention of its name.

“Oh, don’t look at me like that,” Tony tells it, “you’re a menace.”

The robot hangs its head dejectedly and Tony is quick to add, “but you know I couldn’t live without you buddy.”

Immediately the robot lifts its head, or is it its arm? And begins to excitedly rock back and forth. Of course it bumps into a table, causing a series of tools to roll off the edge. Instead of hitting the floor, they float suspended in air until Tony walks over and replaces each one on the table. 

“See, baby proof,” he tells Loki and Steve with a satisfied smile.

“Wow, Tony, that’s incredible.” Steve looks over at Loki to see his husbands reaction.

Loki steps closer to the table and squats down to get a closer look. He tightens his grip on Eirik who tries to reach out for everything within sight.

“I’m impressed. You managed to set up a localized stasis field.”

He picks up a ruler and drops it off the edge of the table. It falls for a few inches and then stops, held in suspension in front of his eyes. Eirik reaches out for the tool and Loki leans in so the child can grab it before standing back up again. 

“Its still small scale. Each table has a power source and sensors that aren’t really practical for large applications, but it’s a solid start.” 

Eirik sticks the end of the ruler in his mouth and starts to gnaw on it. Reaching in to his shirt pocket, Steve pulls out a small stuffed toy and offers it to his son, while Loki takes the ruler, once he lets go and places it back on the table. After wiping it off, of course. 

“Ok, so as great as that is, that’s not why I asked you up here.” 

Tony walks over to a large work table with a lot of electronic parts strewn across it. Always a fidgety person, Steve can tell Tony is actually nervous now. 

“This whole, uh, thing, that happened. With you guys getting hurt and all…. Steve, you were in street clothes and didn’t have your shield. And you’re spending more time out in public. And I was working on Sam’s wings, doing some upgrades and I thought- ‘why not?’ and so I made you this.” 

He picks up a watch and thrusts it towards Steve. The blonde reaches for it with his free hand at the same time that Loki reaches for Eiren with his free arm. Steve helps as he jostles both children a bit until Loki has one resting in each arm where they can watch their father. 

“It goes on your left wrist,” Tony advises and watches in anticipation as Steve straps it around his wrist. 

Steve has approximately 4 seconds to admire the watch before he see’s something flying directly towards his head.

His body tenses automatically and he brings his arm up defensively to block what turns out to be a nerf dart that falls harmlessly to the ground after bouncing off the face of his shield. 

Or, now that Steve really looks at it, not his shield, but rather a holographic image that when he tentatively touches it, is actually quite solid. He looks at Tony, eyes wide with amazement. 

“Tony, this is incredible.” He flexes his wrist experimentally and the shield retracts back into the watch. “I don’t know what to say….”

“I’ll need to do some adjustments once you’ve had a chance to try it out. It’s anchored to the watch so you can’t throw it and it behaves a little differently than vibranium, so you’ll want to practice to get the deflection angles right.”

Steve is still looking at the watch in awe when he responds, “yeah, I’ll have to spend some time working with it, but Tony, really, this is amazing, tha-“, he cuts off as he flexes and deploys the shield again to block the flurry of darts coming from the nerf gun Tony pulled out from the drawer at his work table.

The twins start to giggle as they watch their father duck behind the shield. A click is the only warning Steve has when 4 nerf cannons drop from the ceiling and start to fire at him from different angles. 

By the time all the darts have been shot, some 400 of them, Loki is grinning while the twins laugh uncontrollably at their father. And Steve has a pretty good feel for the way the shield behaves. 

“I think I’ve got some pretty good data, if you leave it here, I can make some adjustments and have it ready before you head home tomorrow.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so I took some scientific liberties here, but its Tony Stark so anything is possible, right?


	57. Chapter 57

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay in posting. I got distracted by a different fic and had to get it out of my head.

 

Chapter 57

 

Home. Loki didn’t realize just how important their little house in Brooklyn was to him until he stepped back through the door with Steve and their children. It had only been a few days, but the circumstances were enough to really make Loki appreciate the life he and Steve have created for their little family. 

As they continue to heal, they pour over every report, every scrap of information that has been accumulated on Hydra over the past several months. It’s a lot of information, but Steve finds it disconcerting that they have not found any trace of a leader other than what points back to General Ross. 

He knows there is someone else pulling the strings with Ross gone and Steve is determined to find them. He shares his concerns with Loki, the only person he trusts completely, with the possible exception of Bucky, and the god agrees.

 

It's been barely two weeks since Steve and Loki have been home. They have just managed to get back into their daily routine with the kids but have not ventured out to the park or to any of the other places they had been going since the attack at the restaurant. 

There had initially been a lot of news activity about the attack and possible motives. At first Steve was upset to see pictures of himself, Loki and the twins in those reports but it was soon pointed out by Tony that public opinion was strongly in his and Loki's favor, with most people expressing outrage on such a blatant attack on innocent children. 

This isn't the way Loki wanted to bolster Steve's, and therefore his own, image, but at least something good will come out of such a terrible situation.

 

General Watson sends over a file on a lead for Steve and the blonde gets to work analyzing it immediately, hoping it will contain information that he can use to track down whoever attacked his family. His determination to take down Hydra is stronger than ever and he spends most of his free time working towards that. 

So it is only three weeks after being home, that Steve and Bucky find themselves in rural Montana breaking into what looks to be an abandoned training facility. At least it appears that way, right up until it doesn't. 

Steve is pressed against a wall, inching his way forward, senses on alert for any signs of activity. Bucky is trailing about twenty feet behind him, watching his back. Steve holds up a hand indicating for Bucky to stop and presses his back against the wall he had been moving along and listens. 

Faintly, he can hear a humming coming from just ahead. Pulling off a glove, he runs his hand across a joint in the concrete wall and can feel air movement. He replaces the glove and looks the joint over carefully. 

There's something here, he knows that for sure. The question is do they scout around more or does he take the direct approach. One glance at Bucky makes up his mind. Steve paces about ten feet from the wall, turns to face it and squares his shoulders, shield held up in front of his body. 

Out of the corner of his eye he can see Bucky give a shake of his head and reach into one of his utility pouches, pulling out a small set of detonators. He moves along the wall to where Steve had been standing and gives the blonde a look of pure exasperation, before beckoning him back over to the wall.

“Really?” Bucky asks as he places several of the detonators along the seam in the concrete.

“What?”

“You were really going to just bust through the wall with your shield?”

Steve opens and closes his mouth, but doesn’t reply. 

“Do you know how mad Loki would be if I allowed you to do something so stupid? You don’t even know what’s behind it. And what if you injured your thick skull?”

Steve doesn’t answer, but he does narrow his eyes at his friend. There isn’t time for anything else as Bucky grabs him and pulls the blonde several feet away.

Bucky sets off the detonators and the wall splits open along the seam, falling in heaps inside the building. Steve doesn’t wait and moves forward in a crouch, shield held protectively in front of his body, while Bucky follows at his back, rifle held at the ready just over his friends shoulder. They move with practiced familiarity that can only come from countless hours spent watching each others backs. 

It’s a bust. Completely empty. No weapons. No files. Nothing. And so is the next location General Watson sends two weeks later and the one a month after that. Each location is empty and it makes absolutely no sense.

 

“Its like they went into hiding,” Steve laments, causing Loki to hum. 

If he had been paying more attention, he would have picked up on the irritated tone. But he isn’t. 

“There has to be something we missed. Some lead.” Steve closes his eyes, pulls in a sharp breath and then exhales slowly. “I’m going to go back over everything we have. There has to be something.”

This time Loki doesn’t verbally respond. He just pulls his hand away from where he had been stroking their cocks together and rolls to his back.

Steve opens his eyes and looks at his husband in confusion. “Why’d you stop?” 

Loki practically jumps off the bed and grabs his pants off the floor, shoving first one long leg and then the other in. “Why did I stop? Really? I’m not sure when you started thinking Hydra is good pillow talk, but its not!” 

“What?” Steve sits up, swinging his feet over the edge of the bed to place them on the floor, and grabs the discarded sheet, pulling it up over his lap, hiding his already flagging erection. “I was just telling you what I was thinking! Like you asked me too!”

Loki tries to zip up his slacks, but his own erection makes for a difficult and somewhat precarious task. He gives up and just allows his pants to fall open in the front, exposing every inch of his length. “I was trying to have sex with you. Not plan a raid,” he hisses. 

And then his tone changes into something much more like a seductive purr, mixed with just a hint of danger. The tone alone is enough to reawaken Steve’s cock. “In my mind, I thought you would tell me how you wanted me to touch you.” 

He takes a few steps over to Steve’s side of the bed. “I had hoped you would tell me how good I was making you feel.”

That voice, low and purposeful, it does things to Steve and Loki damn well knows it.

Loki steps a few feet closer until he is standing just in front of Steve. “I wanted to hear you moan my name as you came.”

He reaches out and grips Steve by the chin, making sure the blonde is looking directly at him, “but maybe you just need something to keep you from talking at all.”

Its almost funny how wide Steve’s eyes open and the way his pupils dilate. But there is nothing funny about the way Steve nods slowly, but very enthusiastically. 

Releasing Steve’s chin, Loki turns and walks a few steps away. With his back to the blonde, he picks up his shirt off the floor and slides one long arm into a sleeve.

“What are you doing?” Steve stammers, unable to completely keep the whine out of his voice. 

Loki grins as he pulls on the second sleeve, but quickly adopts a bored expression before turning to look at his husband. “I thought you wanted to talk about Hydra?”

It has the desired effect, when Steve surges off the bed, letting the sheet drop to the ground. He reaches down and squeezes Loki’s still hard cock, before sinking down to his knees and taking it in his mouth. 

The god tries to keep up his bored act, but the slight waver in his voice betrays him. “I suppose _I_ can talk about Hydra if you’re going to be busy.”

Steve growls around the cock in his mouth, causing a shiver to run up Loki’s spine.

“What’s that?” Loki teases. “Not interested in hearing about Hydra right now?”

What ever he is about to say next is cut off by a particularly hard suck that almost makes his knees give out. 

He composes himself, as much as he can, given the circumstances and asks, “how about a rousing discussion about truth? Honor? Patrio….. fuck….. Steve…...” 

Turns out, he doesn’t have much composure at all when his cock is down his husbands throat.

Loki can feel the low rumble of Steve’s amusement as it travels along his shaft and he has to reach a hand out to steady himself against the dresser. He wants to hold out. Doesn’t want this to end, but Steve seems determined to bring Loki over the edge. And as he swallows down every inch of Loki’s length again, he does just that.

The god takes a moment to recover before hauling Steve up by the arms and pushing him down on the bed. Now that his mouth is free, Loki decides he wants to hear every single sound that he can coax from between those lovely pink lips. And if Steve is able to string together any coherent words, well then, Loki will just need to try harder. 

 

 


	58. Chapter 58

 

Chapter 58

 

Loki walks in the door and takes his jacket off, draping it over the chair. This had been an inconvenient time to get called away to Asgard, the only good thing being at least the trip had been quick. Now, he is ready to spend some time with Steve and the twins. 

It’s late, so he expects the twins to be asleep and Steve to be in bed. From the kitchen, he hears a sound, soft enough that he almost dismisses it, but just before he heads down the hall way, he stops and flips on the light.

He flinches back when he see’s Steve sitting at the kitchen table.

“Why are you sitting here in the dark?” 

Steve looks at him and blinks, “you’re home.”

The corners of Loki’s mouth turn down. “Yes. I am.”

Steve doesn’t respond for a beat and then, getting up from the chair, he puts his arms around Loki. “I missed you.”

“So you sat here in the dark waiting for me to come home?”

“Well yeah.”

“Are the twins asleep?” 

Steve’s eyebrows furrow together and then smooth back out. “They aren’t here.”

“What do you mean they aren’t here? Where are they?” Loki tries to keep his tone even, but it comes out a little high pitched. 

Asgard had been frustrating and exhausting and he really was hoping to see the twins and then curl up in bed next to his husband. Maybe even wake him up to say hello properly. 

“I sent them to the sitter. That way we can have some time alone.”

And that’s nice and disappointing and odd, all at the same time. But Loki dismisses it and holds out his hand for Steve to take, then leads him down the hallway towards their room. 

When they get there, Loki pulls Steve in and kisses him slowly. Parting his lips, he gently nudges Steve’s mouth open deepening it. He can feel Steve fumbling through the kiss and breaks it off prematurely. Loki unbuttons and removes his shirt, then his pants before stretching out on the bed, fully expecting Steve to follow. 

Except he doesn’t. He stands there. Looking around the room. Not moving. 

“Love?” Loki questions, sitting up. “Are you not coming to bed?”

The blonde tilts his head and frowns slightly, “yeah, of course.”

Loki sighs and flops down on his back at the less than enthusiastic tone of his husband. He missed him, but is quickly losing any interest in sex.

When Steve just stands at the foot of the bed, Loki gets up and runs his fingers through his short blonde hair, then dips down, mouthing at his neck, attempting another shot at seduction. He glides his hand down and pulls at the button on Steve’s pants before lowering the zipper. Loki gracefully sinks to his knees and starts to lower Steve’s pants. 

“I have missed you so. I only got through those endless meetings by thinking about how I would come home and allow myself to get lost in your body. I want to feel every inch of you. I want to lay back and have you ride my cock until all I can think about is you.”

Looking up, Loki tries to gauge Steve’s reaction. His cheeks are flushed, which is not unusual and his breathing has quickened. Again, a good sign, but then when Loki reaches in his pants and pulls out his cock, there is a distinct lack of reaction, which is unusual.

“Would you like that love?” Loki gently moves his hand along Steve’s cock, hoping to illicit the desired reaction. “I think I’ll start by taking you in my mouth and seeing just how long it takes you to beg for more.”

Steve’s entire body stiffens and a hand flies to Loki’s shoulder. Looking up, Loki is surprised to see fear and uncertainty in Steve’s face rather than the lust he expected or at least hoped for. He sighs in frustration. He knows he isn’t being fair. If Steve isn’t in the mood, then he isn’t in the mood. 

“It’s late. Why don’t we just go to sleep,” he suggests. He is certain he doesn’t imagine the relief on Steve’s face as the blonde pulls out a pair of pajamas from the dresser and retreats to the bathroom to put them on. 

Its also hard to ignore the way that Steve stays on his side of the bed when he emerges, rather than curling up against Loki. The god is certain something happened while he was gone, but Steve obviously isn’t ready to tell him just yet. He goes to sleep with a distinct sense of disquiet.

 

Loki’s eyes snap open in the dark. He listens intently, trying to determine what woke him and what has the hair on the back of his neck standing on end. Normally, being pressed so close together when they sleep, Steve would have woken immediately, sensing that something was off, but the god can tell that he is still laying on the far side of the bed. 

He can however tell, just by his breathing, that he is awake. Loki assumes that Steve must have been woken by the same thing that woke him. He doesn’t have time to consider any other possibilities before Steve is on him, dragging a knife through the space where Loki’s neck was just a fraction of a second before.

The blade only missed by the width of a hair and only then because Loki had been about to reach for the lamp on his bed side table. As it is, he can feel blood leaking from the shallow cut Steve did manage to make. 

Loki has a tight grip on Steve’s wrist and flips them off the bed onto the floor. The blonde’s back hits the ground first and Loki lands hard on top of him, losing his grip in the process. Steve rears up and head butts Loki in the forehead, splitting his skin open. 

Jumping back to catch his breath and assess the situation, Loki watches as his husband rises to his feet and squares up, ready to attack again. And then he stops. But he keeps the knife raised in front of his body. Loki uses his magic to illuminate the room and he can see the way he is breathing hard and his eyes are darting around. 

“Steve?”

He doesn’t answer right away. In fact, Steve doesn’t seem to do anything. Until he gives a small jerk of his head and looks directly at the god. 

“I’m so sorry. Loki, I’m so sorry.” He looks absolutely crushed, but also wary. Unsure of how Loki is going to react. 

“Steve, what happened?”

“I- I don’t know. I was asleep and then something woke me up and……” he stops and takes a couple of tentative steps forward. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what happened. I must have been having a nightmare.”

He steps closer and reaches up to swipe through the blood dripping down from the cut in Loki’s forehead. “We’ll get this cleaned up and then go back to bed.” 

His smile is soft and full of remorse and Loki leans in to accept the offered embrace. But this time he is prepared. And when the knife that Steve still had concealed in his hand disintegrates in a blinding flash of light just before it pierces the skin in his abdomen, Loki is ready for it.

The god takes advantage of Steve’s momentary blindness and grabs both sides of his head in his hands, sending a pulse of magic into his husbands brain, rendering him unconscious instantly. 

The first thing he does is call Betsy Braddock, who confirms his worst fears, she in fact, does not have the twins with her. The second is he ties Steve up. He reinforces the rope with magical bindings and then gags him as well. 

With that done, he sits on the end of the bed and rests his head in his hands. It takes him a moment to calm his breathing and untangle the jumble of thoughts in his mind. He takes a moment to pull on a set of clothes and then teleports directly to Bucky’s apartment at the foot of his bed. 

If the circumstances had been different, Loki would have been impressed with the way the former assassin rolls out of bed, snatching a gun out from under his pillow as he goes, before the god even had a chance to move. 

“Dammit Loki!” He curses from the floor. “I almost shot you. What the hell is going on?”

“Get dressed. We need to go.”

Bucky takes one look at his friend and decides not to argue, “yeah okay. Gimmee a couple minutes.”

“You have 90 seconds.”

It takes him 68.

They appear in Steve and Loki’s bedroom and find Steve still bound, but very much awake and glaring defiantly over the gag in his mouth. 

“What the fuck Loki?” Bucky yells as he drops to his knees and pulls the gag out.

“Bucky! Thank god. I don’t know what happened,” he babbles, eyes darting between his husband and friend. 

Bucky starts trying to loosen the ropes, but can tell they must be reinforced with magic. Looking back over his shoulder, he tells Loki, “you need to release your magic so I can untie him.”

Before the god can respond Steve starts to talk, voice low and filled with urgency, “Bucky, listen to me. Somethings wrong with Loki. I don’t know what he told you, but he attacked me and then tied me up.” 

Bucky’s hands fall to his sides and he looks back over his shoulder at Loki who is sitting on the end of the bed again, head in his hands.

He turns back in time to see the look of intense hate on Steve’s face before he has time to hide it. 

“I’m sorry buddy.”

“Wha-?” Steve is cut off when Bucky shoves the gag back in place. But he starts to struggle against his bonds, body thrashing on the ground. 

Its hard to watch and so Bucky turns to Loki. “Can you knock him out.”

“For short periods. Longer if I stay near.”

Bucky looks at his friend again. Steve is still struggling, but not so violently now. And he is grateful for he gag that muffles what Bucky is sure is a string of long and inventive curses. 

“Do it. And then tell me what the hell happened.”

 

 


	59. Chapter 59

 

Chapter 59

 

Bucky is pacing back and forth, occasionally looking over at Steve who is still laying bound on the floor. The only good thing, is Loki has rendered him unconscious and so he doesn’t have to listen to his best friend struggle against his restraints anymore. 

The god himself is sitting on the edge of the bed, head still in his hands. 

“Tell me again what happened. Don’t leave anything out,” Bucky instructs.

And so Loki goes through it again. Moment by moment until the point when he went and got Bucky. 

“Maybe he has a concussion?” Bucky suggests.

“I didn’t find any injuries when I checked,” Loki responds, sounding positively morose. 

“Maybe it would be a good idea to have Stark use some of his equipment to run some tests. Maybe he can see something that you missed.” He tries to say it gently, not wanting to make it sound like he is doubting Loki’s abilities. 

The look Loki gives him is sharp, but he pulls out his phone and places the call. Once he confirms he will arrive with Steve shortly, he kneels down beside the blonde and places his hands on either side of his head.

Bucky stays back and watches. He knows what Loki is doing. The god had done the same thing to him years ago. It takes several minutes, but Loki finally pulls away, sitting back on his heels. He doesn’t say anything, just stares down at his hands.

“What did you find?” Bucky asks, knowing by the gods reaction that it can’t be good.

“Nothing. There’s nothing. He doesn’t have any memories of the past few years.” He looks up at Bucky, eyes brimming with unshed tears.

“Nothing of our life…. The twins…” he covers his mouth to stifle the sob that tries to come out.

“He told me he sent them to the sitter, but he has no memories of them. I don’t understand.”

Bucky blows out a breath and reaches down to help Loki to his feet. “We’ll get it figured out and we’ll find them.”

Loki doesn’t respond, just looks at Steve on the ground. 

“I mean it Loki. We’ll find them. Why don’t you go ahead and take him to Stark and I’ll go over this place top to bottom and see if I can find any clues.” 

He places his hand on Loki’s back and applies just enough pressure to get the god to start moving. Bending down, Loki carefully picks Steve up in his arms and teleports them away. 

The first thing Bucky does is call Natasha and ask her to come over and help him and then he calls Sam, asking him to head to Stark Tower because Loki is going to need every bit of support he can get.

 

Right away on the first scan, Tony finds something. 

“What’s this?” He points to a small spot on the imaging screen. 

Bruce steps forward to get a closer look and then grabs a pen light and shines it into Steve’s right ear. 

“I think there may be something in there. Hand me those forceps,” he gestures to the table where he had been working just before Loki arrived with Steve.

Carefully he extracts what appears to a small metal device from within Steve’s ear canal. He hands it off to Tony who shows it to Loki. 

“Do you know what this is?”

The god’s eyes flick between his husband and the device, “I’ve never seen that before.”

“Interesting. Can you keep him sedated while Bruce finishes the scans and I’ll take a look at this and see what we’ve got?”

Loki just nods and sits down to watch the two scientists work. Sam comes in at some point and presses a bottle of water into Loki’s hand before pulling up a chair and sitting beside him. It takes several hours and Loki is exhausted from keeping Steve unconscious the entire time, when Bruce announces that the rest of the scans came up clean. 

Several feet away, at another work station, Tony has the device completely disassembled. “It looks like a comm unit.” He looks at Loki again, “and you’re sure you’ve never seen it? Steve never mentioned anything?”

“No. Nothing.”

Loki’s phone rings and he practically drops it, in his haste to answer it. Sitting so close, Sam can’t help but notice the way Loki’s hands are shaking as he tries to answer the call. He reaches over and gently takes the phone from Loki’s hand. The name on the screen reads ‘Bucky’.

“You find anything?” Sam says as he answers, putting the phone on speaker.

“Other than two empty coffee cups in the kitchen sink, nothing.”

“Two cups? Do you know if anyone came by to visit?” He asks Bucky, but also turns to Loki to see if he knows.

Bucky answers as Loki shakes his head, “wasn’t me or Nat. Thor’s not in town. So unless it was Stark or Bruce, I don’t know. Maybe Betsy?” He offers.

“When I talked to her earlier, she said she has not spoken to Steve in a couple of weeks.” Loki’s answer is spoken softly.

Natasha speaks up, “Loki, this may sound weird, but how many cans of formula and packs of diapers do you usually keep on hand?”

Loki furrows his brows, “the twins go through a lot so usually no less than five cans and three cases of diapers. Why?”

“Well there is only a single can of formula that is almost empty and a couple of diapers. Their car seats are also gone. So I would be willing to guess that where ever they are, they are being cared for.”

“Okay. That’s something at least,” Sam responds.

“How is Steve?” Bucky asks.

“Still out. Tony and Bruce found a comm unit in his ear, but we don’t know where it came from.”

“Actually,” Tony interrupts, “we do. This particular device was manufactured by Hammer Industries. I had Jarvis run the serial number and it looks like this batch were sold to the United States Army.”

“That’s interesting,” Natasha says.

Tony nods, even though she can’t see him, “yeah. I think we may need to pay a visit to General Watson and see if he can tells us anything.”

Loki gets up from his chair and walks over to where Steve is strapped down to a bed. He lifts his hand and holds it close to his chest. Its only now that he notices something he missed before.

“Bucky, can you check Steve’s night stand for his watch?”

“Yeah. I didn’t see it earlier, but I’ll go look again.” 

They can hear Bucky moving through the house and the sound of drawers being opened and closed. 

“Its not here.”

Before anyone else can say anything, Tony announces, “I’m on it.” He swipes his hand through the air in front of his face, bringing up a holographic screen. “Jarvis, can you locate it?”

“Certainly sir,” the AI responds and immediately displays a red dot, superimposed over a map of the United States. The map zooms in until it is focused on Pennsylvania. And then it zooms in closer, focusing on a deeply forested area. 

“That’s odd,” Tony remarks as he manipulates the image. “Loki, does this place look familiar to you?”

The god walks over to stand in front of the image, “no. I don’t recall ever being there or even discussing it with Steve.”

“Then I wonder what his holo-shield is doing there,” Tony wonders aloud. 

As one, every person in the room turns to look at the blonde.

“Natasha, why don’t you and Barnes head out to the site and see what you can find out. Jarvis send them the coordinates. Loki, you keep an eye on Steve. Bruce, see if you can work up another means of sedating him so Loki doesn’t have to do it. Sam, you come with me.”

There is silence over the phone line for a second, but then Natasha speaks up, “you got it. We’ll report back as soon as we take a look. Loki?” 

“Yes,” the god responds quietly.

“Hang in there. We’re gonna find them and figure out what’s going on.” 

She ends the call before Loki has to even think of a response. And he is grateful for that. 

Tony heads for the door and Sam follows behind, squeezing Loki’s shoulder as he walks by. 

Out in the hallway, he falls in step beside Tony, “where are we going?”

“We’re going to get Hulk’s containment cell set up for Steve. Loki looks like he is about to drop from exhaustion and stress. I think we need to get Steve secured, have Loki get some rest and then set up a meeting with General Watson. 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> It you like it, I'd love to hear about it.


End file.
